It's quite evident I do not own Grey's Anatomy, if I did, there would be no need to write this. We'd all be anxiously anticipating, not skeptical about their wedding day.
Spoilers and tweet, marketing hypes, promotional photos, sneak peeks and disclaimers are all making me wish we knew nothing about the landmark 100th episode. For me, a die hard Meredith & Derek fan, anyone's wedding but theirs tonight night will be a disappointment. Therefore, in anticipation of what apparently may not happen, decided to channel some positive thoughts to what most of us hope will happen, but are realistic enough not to expect. Most of all, hoping I am completely wrong about being disappointed with the lack of a Mer Der wedding, and that at the end of 100… we will not feel the rug has been pulled out from under us again.
Borrowing some dialogue and possible scenarios from sneaks, and the promotional photo from season finale that inspired me to write this unlikely story.
Think I may have borrowed some dialogue and concepts from my other fics too, but that's not plagiarism, right? This note may indeed be longer than the story, and you will note, unlike my other writing, did not pay as much attention to the authenticity of the wedding ceremony or vows and such, as it was really the end of the story I wanted to get to. Hope you enjoy this implausible fanfic sneak peek, intended for the most part as tongue in cheek, maybe even a satire. It's their wedding day - I so hope we have the real Mer Der wedding tonight and are dazzled by all the unexpected turns the episode seems to promise. Warm regards, Jasmin...ever the eternal optimist about this couple.
Our wedding day - May 7, 2009
"Just a normal day," Meredith said looking straight to the altar, sunlight filtering through the stained glass windows around the church.
"Normal day," Derek said, "going to work."
"Just a normal day," she sighed, "that ends in a ceremony in a churchy church."
"Has nothing to do with us," he said as they both continued to glance around while standing in the nave of the intimidating structure and turned he his face to meet her gaze, "we're just the bride and groom." and the look in his eyes, that look reserved exclusively for her warmed her heart.
We're getting married tonight," she stated.
"We're getting married," he said and she smiled, and then both looked away, straight ahead to the altar, almost as if they were two marionette's being manipulated in someone's dream, or nightmare.
After taking care of formalities with the minister they returned to the hospital, the start of what they both pretended was a normal day. Their friends, however, had a different story.
Cristina's peppy annoying greeting, soon to be followed by the sarcastic words Meredith could always count on, balanced by Meredith's apparent calm proclamation it was about the marriage, not the wedding, a statement foreshadowing what was yet to come.
Unexpectedly this day, their wedding day would be also remembered as the day the groom presented the bride with an unusual gift, her first solo surgery, only to be pestered by both the chief of staff and the best man.
"Congratulations," Derek said the moment she walked out of the scrub room, where he'd waited patiently for her to finish the surgery.
"It's an amazing feeling," she told him, "like the first time I was in the operating room, with you, remember…"
"Uhmmm…you were waiting here when I came out of that surgery," he smiled and kissed her lips softly. "Wondered why people ever do drugs," he said earning a smile that made her eyes shine brightly.
"You remember…" she smiled and kissed him back.
"There's very little," he told her, "I don't remember about you…about us."
"Thank you," she told him, "for making that happen today, my first solo surgery."
"You deserved it," he said, "I'm proud of you Meredith."
"Ready," she said, changing the subject, "for our wedding?"
"Are you…ready to be Mrs. Shepherd?"
"Derek," she ignored his comment, and told him, ordered really as they walked along the hospital corridor holding hands. "Talk to Mark, and tell him to stop being an ass, or I'm going to ban him from the wedding," she said and they shared a secret smile.
"What has he done now?"
"You saw him, standing over me in surgery and then threatening me…"
"Mark threatened you," he said incredulously, "Mer…he can't be that stupid."
"Wanna bet," she laughed, and repeated what he'd told her about the second time around and making sure he didn't have to do it a third time.
"He is an ass," Derek told her, "you want me to uninvite him?"
"No," she said, "I get the feeling I'm stuck with having him around for a long while."
"Why?"
"Derek, you can't be serious, I'm talking about Mark and Lexie, they're together, seems like he's not toying with her," she said as they reached the door to the resident's lounge.
"Hey," he said, as soon as they walked in, and cupping her face, smiled into her eyes, "any regrets…second thoughts?"
"None," she said, and their lips met.
"Let's go," he said, "we've got a wedding to get to."
The church was filled to capacity for the eagerly anticipated nuptials of the couple referred to as a legend in the halls of Seattle Grace, even by those considered a thorn in Meredith's side. The double doors opened and the wedding party began its procession and a collective gasp was heard as the bride expected to walk down the aisle walked toward the altar dressed in lavender, and in her place dressed in white stood a pale and grateful friend, who had unknowingly planned her dream wedding.
Toward the end of the ceremony Derek rose from his seat, a keen observant would have noticed long before the collective gasp that echoed through the church that the groom had been sitting on a pew, and joined Meredith at the altar and exchanged smiles as the other bride and groom were pronounced husband and wife and a tender kiss exchanged, but remained in their place as the minister addressed the congregation.
"Most of you," the minister began, "gathered here tonight to witness the marriage of Meredith Grey and Derek Shepherd, and instead witnessed the ceremony of Isobel Stevens and Alex Karev. It was the express wish of Meredith and Derek to give their friends the gift of this beautiful wedding, so lovingly prepared by the bride," and the congregation broke out in applause, and Derek placed his arm around Meredith's waist.
"Are you ready," Derek whispered, as he and Meredith locked gazes.
"Yes," she said, her eyes glimmering with unshed tears, and they walked to stand next to the minister.
"Tonight," the minister spoke again, "I have the honor to officiate two ceremonies, as the bride and groom you expected to see will now exchange their vows," he said and electrifying excitement filled the candle lit church. "You may begin."
Meredith and Derek faced each other and smiled, and he reached to hold her hands in his. "Meredith, once when I didn't even know I was drowning, you saved me and brought hope and love back to my life," she resisted the urge to bite her bottom lip, but he felt the slight trembling of the hands he held, "tonight, before our friends and family," he smiled, happy his mom and his sisters accompanied them, "I promise to love you, take care of you, honor and cherish you, to do all in my power never to hurt you again as I have," he said, and the regret in his voice and the shame in his eyes was met with hope and forgiveness, "and from this day forward, you can count that, this time," he emphasized, "I will always be there," and then a smile, "to hover and breathe for you…every day…any day you need me…for the rest of our lives."
She began, her voice barely audible, a whisper filled with emotions, "Derek Christopher," he smiled, once again delighted by the small pendant she wore, the something borrowed his sister Kathleen had insisted she wear when right before the ceremony was to start he had shared with his family the change of plans, and that she'd used his middle name because his mother had mentioned it, "you were right…to know you was to love you," his heart skipped a beat, "I want to be your wife, have kids with you, have you build us a house and grow old with you…I want to spend the rest of my life with you," she said and their reflections mirrored deep emotions as eyes glimmered with joy, "and I promise to love you in good times, but especially the bad, in sickness and in health, and to hold you in my arms every day of our lives."
Theirs were not traditional vows, they couldn't be. Theirs had never been a traditional relationship.
"Do you have the rings?" the minister asked, and Derek got ready to say no, but Mark appeared out of nowhere and placed a ring in her hand, catching Derek off guard, "Meredith, repeat after me."
"Derek," she said, "will you wear this ring as a symbol of my love for you, a promise of fidelity and my commitment to you," she spoke softly and poignantly, as she slipped the ring on his finger, "my soul mate."
"I don't have your rings," he said his voice in a bit of a panic, before Mark stepped up again and placed his mother's ring in his hand along with the wedding band he'd purchased long before he'd proposed, or rather imparted his elevator love letter.
"You didn't tell me," he said for her to hear only.
"I changed my mind," she smiled.
"Meredith," he began, at a loss for words, and reached for her hand, "I give you this ring," he paused, remembering the shameful act when he batted it away, then again, very quietly, "you don't have to do this."
"I do," she said, "I want to."
"Meredith," he covered her hand, his thumb gently caressing it, "will you wear this ring," he held his mother's engagement ring, "take this ring, as a symbol of a love that lasted long after my father was gone, the kind of love I vow to share with you beyond our lifetime," a tear escaped as she nodded and he wiped it away before slipping the ring on her finger, "will you forgive me," he said only for her to hear.
"Yes," she answered.
Then taking the wedding band he said, "please accept this as a symbol and promise of my commitment that I will cherish and protect you, in sickness and in health, in good times, but especially the bad," he repeated her vow, "and know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you, one hundred and ten years worth."
The vows had not been intended to be private, but they were as they spoke quietly and softly to each other, but none of the guests cared, they had gathered to witness the marriage of Meredith and Derek, and witnessing the vows was more than enough to make everyone happy, especially the small group surrounding them at the altar, Cristina, Lexie and Mark.
"You may kiss the bride," was all they heard as the minister recited some formalities, and to the delight of their friends and family exchanged a kiss that sealed the commitment of a lifetime, one begun in a bar long ago.
The planned reception followed as friends and family enjoyed the bittersweet celebration clouded by the almost certain terminal illness of their friend, and then all hell broke lose as an unprecedented trauma forced them back to the hospital. But, not before Meredith and Derek spent time with his sisters, and his mother made a point of speaking to them privately.
"Meredith," Carolyn spoke, "welcome to the family, I knew you were the one for Derek the moment I met you."
"Carolyn," Meredith said, "you must have thought I was crazy with that ridiculous ponytail and…then when I told you…"
"Sweetheart, you are the one for him, I knew it when I met you. I confirmed it when you told me you were not the girls Mom's like…and you were right. Derek, don't look at me like that," she said as she saw him scowl.
"I told you, she was the one, and when she spoke the truth to me, I had no doubts," she said reaching for Meredith's hand, and looking at the ring he'd given her, "I knew she was the one meant to wear the ring I wore all those years."
Meredith accepted with her mother in law's words that part of the commitment she'd made was also about forgiveness. She had told him she'd forgiven him for the incident in the woods. The ring also had a new significance. His mother had accepted her, unconditionally, and that in itself was priceless, maybe she could continue to heal and forget the years of parental abandonment.
Dreams of honeymoons placed were on hold for two different reasons, and it was late into the night when Meredith and Derek reached the front steps of their current home.
"Meredith," he smiled, as he stopped her before opening the door, "we have to do some things right," he teased her.
"Like what," she asked smiling,
"This," he said and swept her into his arms to carry her over the threshold of the darkened foyer, and followed the intimate glow of the fireplace.
"Derek," she gasped, "what …when did you do this…?"
"I can't take all credit," he said, as he released his hold of her, and pressed his body intimately against her as they stood facing each other, "Mark and Lexie helped."
"You trusted Mark," she laughed, "after that awful path he led you for your non-proposal?"
"And your sister, don't forget your sister, but I think Izzie may have had some input."
"She must have," she smiled, referring to the balloons around the room, and the paper wedding bells on the fireplace screen, and the flowers.
"Do you hate it? We can't go on a honeymoon for another week, since we moved the wedding date."
"We kind of moved and then cancelled an entire wedding," she teased.
"But," he teased her, "the honeymoon…that was never going to be cancelled."
"Promises…promises…" she said, as his lips met hers and he devoured her mouth.
"Mrs. Shepherd," he said, by this time, his breathing labored, "happy wedding day…"
"Happy wedding night," she smiled, as the night began with a slow and sensuously delightful exploration of the other's favorite things.
They lay on the floor naked and sated, a light sheen of sweat still covering their bodies, and they smiled, and laughter echoed through the room as they recalled the first time together, never expecting that night would forever change their lives, and subsequent moments spent in the very same room fulfilling each other's passionate desires.
"I love you Meredith," he said, as their bodies became the other's playground where tender words and caresses served to entice, and he quickly reached for her and she lay on top of him.
"I love you Derek," she said as her lips found his, and he deepened the kiss, eliciting moans of pleasure that were only the prelude to a night of passion.
Neither knew how much time elapsed as they lay in each other's arms, his body still joined with hers, and as he attempted to leave her, her body reacted by contracting gently and holding him within her, "don't …" she whispered, "stay inside me."
"I love you," he said, their bodies still joined as one.
"I love you too Derek, I have loved you…forever…"
Early in the morning hours their bodies instinctively sought the other. The embers of the fire long extinguished were not a reflection of their need for each other, and a few whispered endearments again fanned the flames of passion, the prelude to the timeless ritual when two bodies joined as one, found the perfect rhythm, the perfect fit as their movements rose to its inevitable crescendo. His groans, her moans, further enticed the other, and whispered words of I love you, had added to the poignancy of their first time making love as husband and wife, and the sounds of her pleasure echoed through the room as he looked deep into her eyes and witnessed the ecstasy of her surrender, and she his as their love was consummated and their mutual ecstasy sealed what was undoubtedly a love of legends.
Their honeymoon trip had been a total surprise to Meredith. They had returned several days earlier and she smiled as she stood in the kitchen fondly remembering the last day of the trip. Looking out the kitchen window her smile suddenly faded, and she brought a hand to her abdomen and closed her eyes, hoping the now too frequent sensation would disappear. But, she knew it wouldn't, it hadn't since the first time she'd experienced it when Derek had played baseball hermit in the woods.
"Mer," Derek called out, as he walked in the kitchen, "why did you get up so early?"
She turned to face him, a smile that did not quite reach her eyes on her face. "A touch of jet lag, I think."
"That's the third time this week you're out of bed before I am," he pouted.
"I'm sorry," she said, kissing him softly. "I'll stay in bed tomorrow morning," she said, glad her earlier queasiness had disappeared, "promise…morning sex tomorrow."
"Yeah," he smiled, and grabbed her by the waist and kissed her.
"I have to go," she said, "early rounds."
"I'll go with you," he said.
"That's ok, you don't have to be in so early," she told him, hoping to have some time alone in the morning at the hospital.
"I'll come with you now, we can come home together, we have a similar shift."
"Oh…" she hesitated, "ok."
He wasn't sure what to make of her behavior. "You don't want me to come with you?"
"No, of course not, why would you think that?"
"Uhmmm…" was his only comment, but by that afternoon he had no doubts his wife was avoiding him, and he did not like it. The following morning, unlike their conversation the day before, he woke up alone, again, and found a note that she'd see him at the hospital.
Meredith was unaware of her husband's musings, or that it was he that had paged her to the resident's lounge shortly after her shift started.
"Hi," she said when she saw him, and brushed his lips with hers, but he did not react, but rather pulled away from her a bit and stood with his hands in the pockets of his jeans. "Is something wrong," she asked him.
"You tell me," he said, the tone deceptively calm, and his look one she did not understand.
"Nothing's wrong," she said, a half smile on her face, "why would you think that?"
He took a deep breath, "maybe it has something to do with the fact that you're avoiding me."
"I'm …I'm not…" she said, again the half smile that gave her away, "Derek, I just had to come in early this morning…"
"And last night, after I got stuck here and you went home, you were asleep…at nine o'clock ."
"I was tired, I'm sorry," she said, and came closer to him, "I fell asleep."
"And the last three mornings you have left our bed before I even wake up, I'm not a mind reader Meredith, if I've done something wrong, if you're mad at me…I have no idea what I did."
"I'm not mad…and you haven't done anything wrong," she said softly, facing each other she smiled.
"Then why are you avoiding me…"
"Derek," she said, and reached up to caress his face.
"Don't do that," he snapped at her. "Meredith, I damn well know there's something wrong."
"There's nothing wrong, Derek…I just haven't been feeling well, and haven't wanted to bother you," she smiled, this time, a secretive smile, "in the mornings."
"You're not feeing well," he said, concern now overriding his earlier feelings of anger, or better yet disappointment. "Why didn't you tell me, what's wrong…Meredith…how can I take care of you if you don't tell me?"
"Well," she said, and she closed the distance between them, "there's nothing you could have done…and… "
"If you're sick…and there's something wrong…"
"Derek," she said quietly, "I'm not sick, there's nothing wrong, except I've been feeling like crap, especially since we got back and…"
"Meredith," he said, a realization beginning to dawn on him, and he reached for her, holding her close to him, his hand firmly yet tenderly grasping her upper arm.
"Derek," she said hesitantly smiling at him, and the look on his face told her all she needed to know, erasing any doubts or fears.
"Meredith," he whispered, mesmerized by her smile. "There's nothing wrong?"
"Well…" she said, never more sure of the happiness she felt, "only if you've changed your mind about wanting my crappy babies…"
He was overwhelmed by the emotions he experienced within a matter of seconds, unable to say anything he simply held her, never wanting to forget this moment as she looked at him with pure joy in her eyes.
"You're…you're sure…"
"I think so…"
"You…you're ok? Have you seen a doctor?"
"I'm ok…"
"Are you sure?"
"Are you happy?" she asked, though she had already seen his answers, as she glimpsed the depth of his soul.
"Do you even have to ask," he said, and they were lost in each other's gaze. "Are you?"
"After the initial shock you mean," she said, with a soft quiet laugh.
"Shock…" he mumbled, "you're not happy?"
"No…" she said, her mouth inches away from him.
"No…" he repeated, still not sure how he should react to her response.
"Ecstatic," she said upon his lips.
"You are?"
"A baby Derek…we're having a baby…"
"Meredith," he said, and both reached for the other simultaneously and he embraced her, holding her tightly yet tenderly, until he pulled away slightly to look at her, and one hand cupped her face, his thumb caressing her cheek.
"Derek, are you happy?"
"Ecstatic," he echoed her sentiments. "Words…just…I love you Meredith…I love you so much…" he said kissing her softly, unwilling to let her go.
"I love you Derek," she said, and pulling away ever so slightly reached for his hand and brought it to her abdomen, "we love you too."