A/N: Hey guys, I love Danny, Screw anyone who says otherwise, he's awesome. I'll admit his show had some issues but he's still fucking awesome. I love all his philosophical sayings, freaking people out (probably on purpose) about the Iron Fist and his backstory, his fifteen year old hip hop music on the fifteen year old ipod, all his meditation scenes, and walking around barefoot in New York.
I think this is something Danny would do further down the line, when he becomes more comfortable with himself, his company, his team, being a hero. I always thought Danny Rand/Iron Fist was kind of a dork, a funny character, pulling pranks, cheesy jokes, that sort of thing, which I hope we see develop later on in Iron Fist and The Defenders. I hope you enjoy, Happy Reading!
Disclaimer: I don't own Iron Fist, Daredevil, Luke Cage, Jessica Jones or the Defenders,
Joy
Joy's late, very late; she's just glad that she's the co-CEO so no one really cared if she's a minute or 45 late.
"Hey Nikki," she greeted the receptionist at the front desk, Danny's habit of finding out literally every employee's name rubbing off on her, a good habit she supposed.
"Good Morning Miss. Meacham," Nikki greeted back politely with a smile on her face.
Her heels clicked loudly down the hall to the elevator where she met none other than Danny Rand himself, chilling in a corner, with dark blue jeans, a green button up, and you guessed it, no shoes. Joy rolled her eyes. "Really bro," she deadpanned pointedly looking down at his bare feet.
"They mess up my chi, plus shoes are still weird, little sister," he defended himself, wiggling his toes for effect. Then, to her utter horror, he dipped a comically huge spoon into a jar of...mayonnaise...ughah… and shoved the huge spoonful into his mouth.
Her jaw dropped, and she gagged a little, her hurriedly eaten toast looked for an escape hatch, "The hell is wrong with you!?" she practically yelled. Danny fought hard to keep the shit eating grin off his face.
"We didn't have mayonnaise in K'un Lun, I missed it." He tenderly stroked the jar, rapidly shoving the "mayonnaise" into his mouth, making Joy cringe away from him in apparent disgust. He cackled evilly inside his head.
"Ugh, oh my God you're so weird!" Thankfully the elevator dinged and she sprinted out of it to her office.
"Have a good meeting sis!" Danny called after her. The elevator door closed, and Danny let out a cackle, shoving a spoonful of vanilla pudding masquerading as mayonnaise into his mouth. K'un Lun really didn't have mayonnaise, or pudding. He missed the pudding more, but this was bloody awesome. He was so thankful for youtube and elevator prank videos. God he loved youtube and google.
Random Rand Employees who don't want to get fired for calling Danny completely insane, not that he would fire anyone, he's too nice
The elevator was packed nearly to capacity when one of their fearless, yet very odd leaders joined them. But instead of standing facing the numbers like everyone else, he faced the people, an excited grin plastered over his face. One or two of the more fun loving braver employees smiled back at him.
"Simon says pat your head," Danny called patting his head. A few people laughed, one groaned, an intern looked terrified, and about half the people started patting their heads.
"Simon saaaays, blink your eyes rapidly!" and off he went blinking a mile a minute along with most of the elevator.
"Simon says hop on one leg," and everyone started hopping. Almost everyone was grinning or chuckling, except a particularly grumpy old man in the back.
"Hop around in a circle!" he yelled. Two people hopped around in the middle.
"Ha you're out!" the previously terrified intern yelled triumphantly, then looked scandalized for getting so into it. Most of the elevator just laughed.
"Simon says poke your neighbor!" and he dramatically poked the amused woman next to him, and she poked him back triumphantly. The grumpy man in the back sighed and looked at his watch and the elevator numbers impatiently, before a few mischievous fingers poked his sides and back. He sighed, children, every last one of them, he thought to himself. Then one finger poked his side again and again until he smirked and turned poking the perpetrator mercilessly, cackling.
"Simon says stop poking your neighbor!" Danny giggled, in the corner where four elevator riders cornered him and they stopped reluctantly.
The elevator door dinged on the 15th floor and everyone groaned. They were having fun; nobody wanted to go to work yet. "Simon says goodbye!" Danny waved as everyone filed out, apparently they all worked on the same floor.
Ward
Ward rubbed his eyes tiredly as he walked into the building, ignoring everyone and everything in his way. Two interns scurried away from him seeing him in his thunderous mood.
He jabbed the elevator button and sighed when the elevator door dinged immediately. The doors opened onto none other than Danny Rand, his annoying pseudo little brother. He wore a pair of decent slacks, though they were wrinkled, an ugly yellow button up and a pair of ghastly green tennis shoes Ward knew he disliked because they messed up his chi or something, saying the only thing he actually liked about them was the color.
"Hi Ward!" he chirped, holding his roughed up backpack out in front of him.
"Danny," he sighed, not wanting to deal with his annoyingly upbeat brother.
The elevator was silent for two seconds then Danny's backpack squirmed, like something was trying to get out. Danny gripped the backpack tighter, glancing nervously at Ward, Danny's lips doing this weird tick thing. He turned away slightly, opened the top of the bag and whispered, "Hey, stay still." Quietly but still loud enough for Ward to hear him. Ward looked straight ahead, I'm not getting sucked in, I'm not, nope, weird hippy brother is not there, nope.
"I want to come back ouuuut!" a different high pitched voice called, from the bag. Ward whipped around, wide eyed at Danny who turned his head slightly to see Ward for a second before hurriedly turning back to his talking backpack.
"You can't come back ouuut." Danny whispered back, imitating the voice coming from the bag.
"I have to come back ouuuuut!" the voice said again, more urgently this time.
"Why?" Danny asked seemingly bewildered.
"I want to see the boys," the voice said dreamily.
"The only boys left on the elevator are Ward and me." Danny said jerking his shoulder back at Ward, seemingly exasperated with his friend in the bag. God that sounded weird.
"Oh Mr. Ward, he's always so sad. I will serenade him!"
"What? No don't-" But it was too late. The thing inside Danny's bag was singing to Ward, serenading him. Oh Jesus…
"La, La, La, La." the girly voice in the bag began in a sing songy voice.
"Mr. Ward, you're always so grumpy, you grunt and growl and bark at everyone. You're like a pissed off Rottweiler. You should smile more, Mr. Ward, it lights up your pretty green eyes, makes your gelled back hair look less douchy!" Ward dropped his face in his hands ignoring Danny's back shaking with suppressed laughter.
"Ok, you can stop now," Danny whispered, struggling to keep his laughter inside.
"LA,LA,LA,LA!" the bag sang shrilly, "Mr. Ward-" Danny cinched the bag closed. The singing muffled. Then Danny opened the bag again, "La La La!" came out shrilly.
He closed the bag, the voice muffled, he opened it,"LA" closed it, Muffled, Opened it "LA" Muffled, "LA" Muffled, opened it, "It's a good trick Curly,"
"Say goodbye."
"Goodbye Iron Maiden, Mr. Ward," the voice called from Danny's bag, a flirtatious tone on Ward's name that made the man in question shudder.
Danny turned back around clutching the bag, grinning unashamedly.
Ward shook his head, glaring daggers at his little brother, "The hell is wrong with you!"
Danny just burst out laughing. The elevator dinged on the top floor. Ward just stared at Danny, "You are so weird!" he said as he exited the elevator.
"I'll take that as a compliment," Danny called to his back, grinning, leaning against the back of the elevator.
Thank God mom made him take all those ventriloquist classes when he was a kid and learned to throw his voice. He spent a full minute cackling in the elevator at the expression on Ward's face when his bag started talking to him.
He hit the button for the lobby. He exited the building, calling a goodbye to Nikki at the front desk, heading for Colleen's place still cackling intermittently, causing several passers by to look at him like he was a crazy person.
More Random Rand Employees!
The elevator was almost empty except for four people. One of them Danny Rand, recent elevator prankster extraordinaire and three employees, Mary Jones, Juan Marcelo, and Christie Delaware, whom he got to know recently and they were down for a good prank that morning. They all faced the back of the elevator, occasionally letting out an anticipatory giggle waiting for people to enter the elevator. A moment later Danny's wish came true as a group of businessmen and women entered the elevator, pushing the buttons for their floors, scanning their badges first, before retreating to the back of the elevator, facing Danny and company. Michael, an account recognized the blonde as Danny Rand, whom he met a few days ago when Danny visited his department to get to know the people who worked in his company. That day he was friendly, funny, earnest, slightly wary, but overall optimistic. Today though his blue eyes held a glint of… mischief? Michael glanced around the elevator slightly nervously wondering what was going on as one woman Danny had been staring at for a full 30 seconds slowly turned around facing the back like Danny was. Then another man also turned around facing the back, two women followed, until it was only Michael facing the front. Feeling extremely bewildered, Michael felt himself slowly turning toward the back, conforming to the herd. He glanced at Danny before he was turned completely finding the man failing to contain a shit eating grin on his face.
The elevator dinged, three of the men turned around and exited, while two woman hesitantly stepped into the elevator. "Something funny on the wall over there?" one of them asked, chuckling a bit. She had been in the elevator playing simon says with Danny on Tuesday, so she knew this was one of his elevator pranks. Both women faced the front not turning around, to Danny's disappointment for their short flight up two floors before exiting.
On that floor another man entered the elevator, brow creased in confusion. As he waded into the black jacketed backs of the crowd, he tried to turn around to face the front like a normal human, but a minute of staring into the blank eyes of the man in front of him he quickly turned around.
Danny could barely keep his excitement in check, it's working! Yay! The next couple floors continued in the same manner until it was just him, his new pranking buddies, and a woman he remembers as Marcy Nelson, who works in Marketing. She realised it was just her and Danny and the other three who were facing the back when she first got in. She slowly turned back around, eyeing the pranksters suspiciously. Danny's blue eyes wide and earnest glinted innocently as if to say, who me? She just smiled, shook her head at her boss's antics and got off on her floor, "Happy pranking Mr. Rand," she called casually as she exited the elevator.
"Have a nice day, Miss Nelson," he replied as the elevator doors closed. Marcy turned back around to the closed door, surprised. She didn't think he would remember her name. They only met once two weeks ago. She smiled, pleased; it always felt good to be remembered.
"Yay! I can't believe that actually worked!" Mary exclaimed her red hair bouncing up and down as she bounced in the elevator. She's always wanted to do this.
Danny grinned at her antics, high fiving her and the other three. The elevator dinged and the moment before it opened the four of them got back into position to do it all over again.
The Defenders
They took the only working elevator down from the thirty-fifth floor of a building undergoing construction that they happened to be fighting ninjas in. Fucking Hand! Maybe this wasn't exactly the best time for this, but it might lighten the mood a little so Danny started spinning in place. Jessica rolled her eyes, Matt smirked at their youngest's antics, and Luke let out a laugh. "What the hell are you doing?" Jessica asked slightly annoyed, reluctantly amused.
Danny shrugged, "Spinning,"
"I can see that dumbass, why?" Jessica asked looking at the overgrown puppy, spinning, in an elevator, post battle.
Danny just shrugged and kept spinning. The elevator was slow, really fucking slow, and about five floors down, Luke started slowly spinning with his friend, seven more floors down and Matt starts spinning, "Jesus, why are you two spinning?" Jessica threw her hands up exasperated with her strange friends.
"I'm not sure," Matt responded confused, letting out a nervous chuckle.
Jess held out the longest, only starting a slow spin ten floors to the bottom, speeding up only slightly towards the end. The elevator dinged to all four Defenders spinning in place, "Jesus why the fuck am I spinning?" Jessica asked bewildered. She stopped spinning and got out of the fucking weird spinning elevator.
"Oh that was awesome!" he chuckled.
"What?" Matt asked, also wondering why he was spinning in an elevator.
"I've been doing elevator pranks and experiments all week! This was the second funniest one."
"What was the funniest?" Luke asked curious.
"When I had a conversation with my bag and it talked back to me, with Ward in the elevator." Luke raised his eyebrows and Matt let out a laugh, "God you should have seen his face!" The three exited the elevator and started walking down the street.
"Wait, the bag talked back?" Matt asked bewildered.
"I'm a ventriloquist," Danny said the same way he said "I am the Immortal Iron Fist" to literally every single person he met.
"Of course you are," Luke sighed, Jesus, his friend was weird, but a cool weird, sometimes.
"Yeah my mom made me take lessons. I got really into it. I even kept doing it in K'un Lun, scared the shit out of Lei Kung when his chopsticks started singing!" Danny grinned fondly at the memory.
"That's cool man," Luke said clapping a hand on his back.
"Pineapples!" A deep, hoarse sounding voice came from Luke's left. He jumped about a foot in the air and Danny was cackling evilly behind him.
"Gotcha!" he laughed.
"So why did we all start spinning, especially when Jessica thought it was so stupid?" Matt asked.
Danny shrugged, "Social norms, when it was just me, I was breaking a social norm, standing still, looking straight ahead in the elevator. When Luke joined me, it was up for grabs who was breaking the norm and who was obeying it, when Matt joined, Jessica was the one breaking the social norm by not spinning and her superego, the part of her that wants to follow the rules, probably a very small part, corrected that, and that's why she started spinning, or at least that's what the internet told me." Matt remembered something about that from a sociology class he took years ago so it made sense.
"What other pranks did you pull?" Luke asked curiously. He needed a good laugh to distract from the constant ninja battles.
"I ate vanilla pudding out of a cleaned out mayonnaise jar and freaked Joy out, and I got a packed Elevator at Rand to play Simon says with me, and some friends and I got a few packed elevators to turn around and face the back of the elevator; it was fun!" Luke chuckled imagining a group of tight ass business people playing Simon says on an elevator with Danny.
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K9KID OUT!
