DISCLAIMER: I do not own nor claim to own the Characters in this story. The magic that is Twilight was created by Stephanie Mayer and therefore she is God :P

NOTE: I am a fanfic virgin. This is my first go at it so be gentle and review!

Edwards POV

October

As I walked up the path to our...MY family's home I really didn't know if I could make it the whole way. What was I going to say, what was I going to do? My whole life, my whole being after, has never experienced such pain.

I gasped for air, knowing my lungs had no need for the oxygen, falling to my knees I dug my hands into the dirt and cried. I cried out for my soul, the being of my existence, my lost love. "BELLA"

November

December

January

"How could I not see this coming?!!" I heard Alice hiss to someone, I didn't care who. Nobody could see this coming, I could not even hear them coming and I was by her side, when... when it... I choked with emotion. I couldn't even bare thinking it, I didn't want to remember, I didn't want to exist anymore!

I heard someone coming up the stairs, I knew with their slow movement they were hesitant to even come near my room, let alone knock on the door like they were now.

I didn't move I remained still, not even bothering to listen to the person's mind, to see who was annoying me by being 'alive' and she not. I snorted at the thought of saying that any of my family where 'alive'. The person, knocking misinterpreted my snort as a cue for them to enter.

Alice, of course it was Alice. It always was. She had taken the news worse than the others. I know her and Be...were close, but, I think that she felt worse for not seeing.

"Edward..." She hesitated, trying to read my face. I didn't move, still staring unseeing through my glass wall. "Please come downstairs, if not to see us at least please hunt"

I finally saw my reflection, and God did I look awful. My hair was lank, my eyes look sunk into my skull and even though it was no mirror, I could see the blackness of my eyes. I clucked a small chuckle and turned to Alice. She took a step back.

"It's ironic isn't it" I mutter, talking to myself more than Alice. "If windows are the eyes to the soul what do mine say about me" My eyes prick, and if it were possible I would have cried.

Alice rushes to my side in one graceful move. She looks nervous. I hate that. My own sister scared to be in the same room as me! I should have guessed that months of solitude and no hunting would make another person wary to be near me.

"I couldn't stop it. That... that thing! I... I ..." I choked on my words, and Alice took my hand in hers.

"Oh Edward, you can't beat yourself up like this. There was nothing anyone could have done, nobody could have guessed what would...!" She cut off, and for the first time I looked into her eyes. They were as dark and lifeless as mine.

"Edward!" She snapped, standing up "I can't bare it anymore. I love you, and I love Bella!" She looked at me as she saw me wince at the sound of her name. "She's gone Edward, and I miss her too, and I know it's not nowhere near how you are feeling" She sighed and ran her fingers through my hair. "You still have the rest of your family Edward, we all love you, and we want you back..." She trailed off and sighed, her tone changed.

"Jasper is waiting under your window for me. He demands I go hunting" She patted her stomach and tried her best to lighten my mood smiling. "I've eaten nearly as little as you Brother"

As she walks away the dry thud in my throat aches and roars into a flame I feel I cannot extinguish.

"You're welcome to join us" With that she jumps from the window and I follow.

Jacobs POV

How much longer would they be? I thought as I padded up and down the treaty line. I was looking for any sign, anything at all that my Bella and her filthy reeking bloodsucker had returned. It had been so long. I just wanted to see her goofy smile!

I was done waiting; it had been what, 6months. I whistled, wow, I don't think I had ever been away from Bella for so long. My chest ached, I knew when she returned, she wouldn't be the same. Stupid bloodsuckers. Ruin EVERYTHING for me!

That was it; I'd had enough waiting around like some stupid lap dog. I headed over to the Cullen's place. I hated giving 'them' a name, but Carlisle had cast his magic spell over me whilst treating me one evening after patrolling. I mean come on, who would send me to a 'real' doctor, who from my temperature would think I should be dead let alone from the intensity of the injuries I had suffered.

I keep sniffing the floor, trying to pick up their scent. My hackles rise as it feels like someone has just poured bleach down my throat. Yup, I was on the right track. I pick up my speed into a light jog. I love being in wolf form. Everything is so simple as you see and feel through the wolfs mind and body. The only downfall was the pack mind thing...man I was lucky tonight. Everyone had enough of me the last few months. Every time I phased everyone phased back almost straight away, fed up of my constant thoughts of Bella. I say almost, seeing as though Leah would always stay a little longer to snicker at me and tell me how she wasn't coming back and to get a grip of myself. "Bella doesn't want you now, so do you think she will seriously want you anymore when she's one of them?!"

I was glad to be alone, listening to the thud of my heart and the drum of my paws on the soft forest floor. "Whoa?! What the" I'm outside the bloodsuck...Cullen's house and I can hear someone. If you have come back already and not told me, so help me Bella!

The smell stops me in my tracks. Edward...alone. I peek through the undergrowth and see him walking slowly towards the house. He suddenly falls to the ground screaming Bella's name.

I have never seen anyone look in so much pain, his face, god his face. I felt like running over to him and ripping apart every piece of him. I just can't move it's like I've been speared to the floor. His face although in pain it shone like a beacon. I just wanted to run over to him now and grab him in my arms. "Jacob what are you thinking!" I huff to myself and turn to run with one last glance...

His face....my heart aches and a tear falls from my eye. I phase back to human form and start the long walk home as confused as hell.