Rewind – Chapter One

I'm in a really bad mood today, so I'm just gonna write this now. I need this so badly.

[Edit] Well then. I'm in a bad mood again. This is just going to be the story I go to when I get depressed, because, for whatever reason, depressing things make me feel less depressed.

[Edit] My other notes made it seem like this was a vent fic. I'm sorry, it's not. I actually have a twisted plot to go with this torture, I promise you.

Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist does not belong to me. Break Me Down does not belong to me.

( 1 )

-[ Scream My Name ]-

A long day alone
Emptiness is so real
Never having peace of mind
Running from what I can't see
And there is nowhere left to hide
Turn and face these empty eyes
All alone, heart untold

My screams and the screeching of the blade were the only sounds in the room. There was no more laughing from my captors. There were no more crackling sparks from the broken light above us. There was no more clanking of metal as Alphonse tried desperately to help me. There was blood in one of my eyes, I couldn't see out of it. I couldn't see Alphonse, he was too far away. So unreachable.

Help me, please...!

My little brother's eyes had dulled, becoming almost blood red without the normal ring of white in the center. His armor was slumped against the bloodstained pillar he was chained to.

The knife hit the side of my face again, and my head was snapped to the side. I let out a single, desperate cry, when I lost sight of Alphonse. There was only one person blocking my view, only one person in the room other than him, actually. Me.

Because, Alphonse...

The knife had suddenly lodged itself between the bones in my arm. Agony was crawling up the limb, leaving stinging trails of blood, but I had to check to make sure that I wasn't dreaming again. I just couldn't tell anymore! I was screaming, right? Everything always hurt, so bad...

The person was silent. Though the pain and crimson splatters, I couldn't even make out his face anymore. He was just a nameless bringer of peace in this confusing nightmare. The knife was gone. Then it was back. Suffering grew, tears flowed, and life grew weaker. It was as simple as that. But when this newly found order left, things started to shatter, ripping apart at the seams. It still hurt, oh yes it hurt, so badly, but it wasn't that simple. Alphonse, only in that moment, was hurting more.

The man was gone. The knife was gone. The blood remained, drying on my prone body, the floor, and the lone hand-print on the front of Al's chest plate, reminding me exactly of what I had to do to remove Alphonse from this kind of torture.

I could never suffer more, there was just no way.

Alphonse, listen to me!

He was starting to stir a little. I still couldn't see him, the dried blood had started to seal my eye shut and the other eyelid was too exhausted to lift itself anyways. The small clink of chains that couldn't have been mine was reason enough to believe my brother was returning.

The silence stretched onwards, unbroken except for the tiny breaths of the defeated Fullmetal Alchemist. My head hung forward, my lips slightly parted in a vain attempt to make breathing easier. It didn't help at all, the still air drifting sluggishly into my lungs and doing its best to drive away the ever present dizziness lurking at the corners of my mind.

There was a noise from my right, but I couldn't really tell what it was. It seemed like a voice, but that was impossible.

Alphonse never spoke.

The word scratched my sore throat as I whispered my desperate plea, "Alphonse...?"

There wasn't a response. My hopes plummeted, and a sharp sigh escaped my mouth as I inwardly scolded myself for even humoring the possibility that Alphonse was okay again.

"Brother?"

My whole body jerked, pushing against the rough chains keeping me upright, and my eyes snapped open. I looked to my right, trying to choke back the cry I was so close to voicing and ignoring the bloody mess of a shoulder that was partially hidden under the damaged port. My bloodshot eyes met with glowing white orbs, and my bloodied lips immediately twitched upwards into what I supposed was a grin. My teeth clenched down on another shriek as a new gash scraped its way across the tightly wound chains.

Alphonse was there. Really there. He wasn't hanging off of the pillar any more, and his helmet was turned in my direction, his stare focused directly on me.

Please, Alphonse...!

"Al!" I shouted, the sudden movement making my throat seem like it was collapsing in on itself, but it was worth it. Because this was Alphonse, finally. He was better!

But then there was another noise, and my exhausted neck dutifully turned my head towards the entrance to the room. The silhouette standing in the doorway was so terribly familiar. I knew this. But I still turned back to Al, trying to keep the slightest hope alive that he would stay with me this time.

It died as soon as I saw his eyes, dulled and lifeless again. Then the man's needle was digging into the skin near my eye, pulling the torn skin together, and I was screaming again.

It was all the same. All lost. All frozen. I didn't try to talk to Alphonse anymore. If you could call it that. Al wasn't there anymore. It was just his empty shell, the soul trapped submissively inside a metal prison.

I supposed that was me as well, but that didn't stop me from feeling the pain. The scars had grown old, they had nearly given up on me. Just hurry up and finish it, anything would be better than seeing what had become of us. We weren't the infamous Elric brothers anymore. We were the broken, tortured husks of human beings.

What was I supposed to do again? I had forgotten at this point. I knew, somehow, that they had wanted me to do something... But I couldn't remember what!

I shook my head violently, the thoughts too complicated to comprehend. I let myself settle into that small part of my brain still intact, the part that held the knowledge given by the Gate. I let the knowledge wash through me, distracting me from the real world, though one might call what I was escaping to a far harsher reality.

But that reality didn't involve Alphonse's absence, and that was all that mattered.

And then an absence was filled, and there was someone else in the room. I could just tell now, though I had stopped caring weeks ago.

"Hey, pipsqueak!"

Oh, his voice was new. I silently took note of this new presence, then retreated back into the calming information.

"Hey! I'm talking to you!"

There was a dull pain near my right knee, but I didn't feel like responding to it.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!"

The dull pain strengthened, and my brow scrunched in annoyance. Why was there another person here anyways? They had stopped hurting me weeks ago. They had admitted defeat! Were they lying?

I tried to pull back into awareness, curious of the intrusion, but something was holding me back. Little hooks digging into my consciousness, trapping me in the blackness of my empty mind. I felt like screaming, but nothing could escape my lips. The old chains dug into my stomach, scraping against the scarred skin. I was choking, I couldn't breathe!

It was then that I decided that I didn't like this newcomer at all.

Finally, the bindings on my mind and body dropped, and shoved me forwards, into awareness, into reality. My eyes opened, sending an overload of information to my brain.

It first registered that there was an actual source of light in the room. The small light from above had burned out long ago, leaving no way to see well in the small space. Not that there was much to see, normally.

But now, there was. There was a person there. She looked like a teenager, with long, spiky black hair and a skimpy black outfit. That was a lot of black, it seemed.

But I was getting distracted. The person was saying something, looking down at me as I lay limp on the floor.

"This is your last chance, pipsqueak."

That's odd, her chest looked awfully flat for a girl's… Wait, chance for what?

"Make us a philosophers stone, now, or I'm killing your stupid excuse for a brother!"

Brother? Right, Alphonse. I let my tired eyes drift towards him again. The same as ever, not responding, eyes dulled, covered in dried blood.

"Can you hear me? I'm going to kill him! He'll be gone!"

Gone? He was already gone. What point was there? What was a philosophers stone again? I couldn't remember. My head hurt…

The girl- or was it a boy?- kicked my stomach, making the breath lingering in my throat rush out all at once. It's face was twisted into an expression of anger. At least, I thought it was. It must have been, but I didn't remember any of the other people being angry when they hurt me. Just purposeful.

He started walked towards the suit of armor that was still chained to a pillar, his feet hitting the ground with a loud thunk with each step. I finally sucked in another breath as the person stopped in front of what used to be Alphonse. My eyes were stretched wide, right to their limit.

I couldn't figure out why I cared so much. Alphonse was lost a long time ago. Nothing would change if he left again. After all, I had survived the first time, hadn't I?