"And I, I never understood what was at stake. I never thought your love was worth its wait. Well, now you've come and you've gone. I've finally worked it out, finally worked it out"
Daryl never had an issue carrying weight. He grew up hunting and working on cars. Both of those activities had left him physically fit and able to lift heavier items. Hell, it wasn't that the body currently in his arms was even that heavy. He could remember a time when he had started sassing Beth Greene about being heavier than she looked.
But unlike the last time he swept her up in his arms in a similar position, there was a heaviness that was not present before. The heaviness aided the guilt that was weighing down his soul. He should have known wanting something as nice as Beth Greene would end in disaster. Dixon's didn't get nice things. He was too late and Beth was dead because he fucked up.
Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead like Merle, like his Mama, like anything he ever loved, his mind repeated on a mantra.
He could remember one day his daddy telling Merle and him that "Dixon's don't get no nice things." At the time the only part he remembered was Merle's smart mouth telling their daddy that was a double negative, which meant Dixon's do get nice things. The only thing Merle got was a beating. But maybe Will Dixon had been onto something.
Daryl had hesitated, their last conversation outside of telling her he would meet her on the road was cut off. He liked to think if they hadn't been interrupted that he would have been brave to elaborate. That he wouldn't have left her to make assumptions. He should have told her in that moment what he was feeling so she could have known, maybe if she had known she wouldn't have recklessly stabbed that cop. Maybe if she had known, she wouldn't be dead.
Daryl had thought nothing would have caused his heart the steady thrum and at the same filled with heaviness as the moment she breathlessly mouthed "Oh". But that wasn't true anymore, no. Carrying her dead body was beating that and he wasn't sure he'd ever recover.
"I never should have told you. I never should have let you see inside. Don't want it troubling in your mind. Won't you let it be?"
Daryl will never be able to explain in words the pain of abandoning Beth's body because of the herd. They had barely dropped the coffin into the ground. They hadn't even had the opportunity to cover the coffin with dirt.
Maggie's grief stricken screams echoed and pierced his soul. Though, Maggie's crying hadn't been the worst part. Abandoning Beth hadn't been the part.
Listening to Noah's account of what had happened to Beth and what the male cops really did at Grady made his stomach clench. Her actions for stabbing the female cop seemed less insane, less out of character for her. She had ended fighting for family, for justice, for good to remain in this forsaken world.
Daryl couldn't help but think that Beth was the last of the good in the world. Sure, he still had his family and he believed they were good. But Beth was a kind of light that would never be able to be replaced.
At night, when he wasn't hunting or on watch, his sleep was plagued with nightmares. Nightmares that depicted Beth at the hands of a faceless cop screaming for her family. Those dreams always left him in a cold sweat.
The morning after a particularly bad series of nightmares Noah approached the hunter.
"I shouldn't have told you about Grady. I'm sorry man." Noah looked genuinely upset. Daryl knew his nightmares weren't a secret and the kid felt like he made the situation worse by being honest about the monsters that hid behind those walls at the hospital.
"Nah, needed to know. Needed to know the truth, ain't yer fault I failed her" Daryl usually didn't waste words trying to comfort others. Not since the loss of Beth, but he figured the kid didn't need to blame himself anymore. He escaped because of her twice, and to him that was enough to know the kid was good.
"I don't know if this will change anything for your nightmares, but Beth she was tough. She fought. She was never a victim, she was a warrior in there" Noah placed a hand on Daryl's shoulder before hobbling over to Eugene when his name was called.
Daryl knew his head and his heart wouldn't let it be, but at least maybe his nightmares can show Beth fighting back with some of the things he taught her.
"She is something to behold. Elegant and bold. She is electricity running to my soul"
Daryl was rooted to his spot. He remembered Rick's friend Morgan, the one he considered bat shit insane. But at this moment he could have dropped to his knees and worshipped Morgan as the new messiah.
Beside Morgan was the impossible, he rubbed his eyes and she was still standing there. Beth fucking Greene had been brought back by Morgan or they had somehow missed her being alive. That thought clenched in his gut.
The oversized green military jacket and laced up hiking boots and her standard matted ponytail sent chills down Daryl's spine. He figured she could have worn the same blood spattered clothes they partially buried her in and he would still see her as the most beautiful creature to walk the planet.
Seeing her again, was like Georgia right after a storm. It felt as though the world had stood still and there was a brief moment of darkness before light surged as the electricity turned back on.
Daryl figured from now on Beth would always be the electricity that powered his soul. Nothing would ever be as important as her.
"And I could easily lose my mind. The way you kiss me will work each time. Pulling me back into the flames. And I'm burning up again, I'm burning up again"
Daryl was hesitant about being affectionate with Beth in front of the group. It wasn't that he was embarrassed of her or that he thought the group would judge him. Most had connected the dots with the way he grieved when he had thought he lost her.
The group had silently supported the duo as they fumbled through their feelings and expressing said feelings.
No, Daryl hesitated with affection in front of the group because each touch of their lips set fire inside of his soul. He thought each one would burn right through him. Each kiss was similar to the moonshine they used to ignite that cabin. It was the spark and with each kiss he felt closer to placing his past behind and becoming the man Beth had told him she believed him to be.
Daryl didn't kiss her in front of the others because he wasn't ready to show the fire Beth ignited in his soul as they connected.
"Lips generous and warm. You build me up like steps. Eyes innocent and wild"
Daryl sighed against Beth's lips. They had gone out on their routine hunting trip. They always managed to find game, but the first few minutes was always spent kissing.
The fire was always there, around their family it was a simmering slow burn but when they got moments together without the eyes of the group that fire became a scorching inferno.
Beth pulled after several minutes of lazy kissing. Her wide doe eyes looked up and she smiled with her swollen lips.
"We better catch some dinner, Mr. Dixon. You gonna continue teaching me how to track and use that crossbow?" Beth asked like she did every time.
"Course, gotta make sure you got some useful skills" Daryl told her gruffly. He knew that she understood he was only kidding. He had told her plenty of times he had never met anyone as smart as her or had quite the range of skills that she possessed.
"Thank goodness I've got the best teacher around" She teased back.
It took a moment. Daryl felt pride and fear swirl in his belly.
"Ain't the best, just the only one around" Daryl was okay with that. He had made peace with that a while ago.
"Even if others could teach me, I'd only want you to teach me. I'd only want you" Beth told him. Her eyes held that same wild innocence they held the day they argued outside of the moonshine shack.
Her eyes challenged him to find an argument to her subtle way of building him up. To see that he was worth something, that he was a valuable member.
Daryl couldn't think of words to respond so he pulled her close and kissed her.
"And I could easily lose my mind, the way you kiss me will work each time. Calling me back to bed, singing Georgia on my mind"
The state sign had seen better days before the apocalypse took away the upkeep. The damaged sign was on its last leg, but Daryl could still read the elegant script. "Thank you for visiting Georgia, come visit again"
Daryl remembered the time he shared with Beth that he had never been outside of the state of Georgia. She was the only one in their family with this knowledge. The only one who seemed to understand his hesitation as he looked at the sign.
He felt uncomfortable traveling into an unknown territory, but he'd be damned if he forsook a safe haven. Especially one that could offer security for Beth to grow old without seeing anymore horrors. After almost losing her twice, he planned on keeping her glued to his side while still giving her the best shot at an actual future.
His thoughts were racing but they came to a screeching halt when she laced their fingers together and brought their conjoined hands to her lips giving the briefest and lightest kiss.
"You gonna miss Georgia?" Beth quietly asked him.
Daryl contemplated that question. He didn't think so. The old sentiment of stuff he never had growing up didn't hold him back anymore. Not when Beth helped break down those barriers.
"Nah, got all I need here. You're all the Georgia I need" and with that Daryl took his first steps outside of the Georgia state line holding onto Beth. The world was still filled with dangers, but the only thought Daryl cared about was that Georgia was never his home. No, his home was in the body of Beth Greene and wherever she went, he would follow.
Thank you for reading, stepping back after a brief break is always a little nerve wrecking so let me know what you liked or hated.
I'd like to dedicate this to Ashley (Akiraflame), Jazzy (Jazznsmoke), and Kels (coolstoryshawty). These three beautiful beautiful souls have been my cheerleaders and therapists as I stepped back into writing. You guys are everything, thank you so much for being incredible.
As always, I don't own TWD or any of it's characters. I also don't own the song Georgia performed by Vance Joy.
Joy, Vance. "Georgia" By Vance Joy. Dream Your Life Away. Atlantic Records, 2013.