Banana Cream Pie
By Lomeinie
Rating: G
Spoilers: General Season 2
Summary: Rose finds out the very sticky consequences of not listening to the Doctor.
Beta: KRWalker, thanks for being such a FANTASTIC beta!
Disclaimers: I do not own the Doctor or Rose as they both belong to the BBC. Since I have made no money off of this story, I expect not to be sued over it.
Author's Note: This bit of silliness was written as a result of a challenge by my friend aricadavidson.
The 404 in the text marks the section my beta has yet to get back on me on. I'd wait for her feedback and suggestions but I'm not sure where she's gotten off to. I'll correct that section in the future after she gets back to me.
0o0
Rose glared at the Doctor's back, following him into the TARDIS. She was wiping in vain in at her face -- an action that succeeded in only making the mess worse. A combination of melted ice cream, fruit syrup, whipped cream, and chocolate sauce covered every inch of her and was quickly drying into a thick, sugary shell.
Her hair wasn't in much better condition. There were remains of various sticky substances matting her locks down against her forehead, and a cursory assessment of her clothes had told her it'd be a lost cause to try to salvage her outfit. She'd never been very good with the wash, but she still knew getting chocolate sauce stains out of clothing was nearly impossible.
The Doctor had gone straight for the controls, and after he had sufficiently freed his hand with a clean rag, he set the controls to take them into the vortex. Rose waited for thirty seconds after the time rotor started, and then though it better to wait another ten seconds before she cleared her throat.
The Doctor eventually turned his eyes her way, an expression resembling sheer annoyance on his face, "Don't look at me like that. I'm not the one who gave the signal for a food fight back there." He moved around to flip more switches, his back once again to her.
Rose walked closer to him until she was deliberately in his path before retorting in exasperation, "How
was I to know that grabbing a second treat off the tray of a passing waiter was the universal signal to start a food fight?"
404
"Simple, you listen to what I'm telling you about a planet before we step out the door," he snipped while moving around her. "Do you even listen to anything I say?"
Rose stayed put in her spot, "Course I do." The Doctor offered her a skeptical look. "I do." When more skepticism entered his eyes, Rose acquired a sudden interest in the gunk beneath her nails, "Except when you prattle on so."
"Aha, I knew it!" He waved a finger at her, "I knew you weren't listening to me before when I said 'If you want another treat, just push back from the table, and stick the feather in your hair.' I knew it because you had this look on your face like it was going in one ear and out the. . . Wait a minute, hold on! When do I ever prattle on so?" The Doctor asked sulkily.
Rose looked at him again, retorting in a sweet yet sarcastic tone, "I don't know except maybe like just now?"
"None of your cheek, Rose Tyler," he responded in kind, "And don't think I don't know what you're trying to do."
"How do you mean?"
"You're trying to make out what happened on Maazuokookus to be my fault when you know very well it's not." He crossed his arms before he announced, "Now that we're safely adrift in the vortex, I'm going to go get cleaned up." He started out of the control room, firing off over his shoulder, "Might I suggest you do the same?"
The Doctor's abrupt departure caught her off guard, so she only got out on short phrase before he moved completely out earshot, "Use all the hot water, and I'll kill you!" But he's gone so she doesn't hear his response if he ever bothered to give one.
It's just as well as Rose realized how silly her threat sounded when the TARDIS seem to have a never ending supply of deliciously hot water. Speaking of the TARDIS, she must have stood there long enough to warrant protest as the lights started dimming visibly in the room. Rose looked up towards the ceiling and said, "All right then, I suppose you're tired of me dripping sticky all over your flooring, eh?" As if to respond in the affirmative the TARDIS seemed to audibly groan at her, causing Rose to smile. "Right, I'll go get cleaned up too then."