Thanks to 'ohthestuffoflegend' on tumblr, this all came out suddenly, which i actually think helped because i needed a break from writing Mark's baby story stuff on fictionpress because lets be honest, I've been working on that shit for nearly a year and jesus, i needed a distraction.
But she still made me feel too much with her nice little analysis of Alex leaving Gene and neither of them getting anything in the end... ow...it hurts...
Alex Drake looked out the window of Luigi's. It's winter, she thought sadly to herself as she watched the snow fall gently onto the ground. Inside, the pub was noisy. The lads were changing the lyrics to Christmas carols, and a fire was roaring in the fireplace. There was a tree in the corner of the trattoria, and fairy lights twinkled around the bar.
"You doing okay, ma'am?" Shaz asked, sitting next to her.
"Yeah," Alex said, looking down at the pint of beer someone had bought her earlier in the night. "Sometimes, I just can't believe how the year has gone."
"You know the Guv wouldn't want you to be moping about. Especially not now. Not at Christmas."
"I know. Christmas is a time of cheer and good will toward men," Alex responded sarcastically.
"And chasing criminal bastards around to get back what they've nicked," Ray said, sitting down across from her.
"I didn't realise you were even listening," Alex said, giving a small smile.
"Yeah, we stopped singing because Chris about died laughing with 'Oh Come All Ye Faithful'. He's in the back, still giggling. Poof." Ray took a long drag on a cigarette.
Shaz rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "I'll go get him sorted," she said.
"I'm sure she will," Ray said in an undertone to Alex, waggling his eyebrows.
Alex stifled a laugh. Her smile faded soon after, however, and she was back to brooding over her pint.
Ray cleared his throat, slightly uncomfortable. Although he and Alex had grown closer since Gene had disappeared at the end of January, he was not able to handle outpourings of emotion. It just wasn't one of his talents.
"You doing okay?" he finally asked.
"You know, you're the sixth person to ask me that today?" Alex responded, studying him for a moment.
"You just seem more out of it today. Like you were back in February, after they changed the Guv's status to 'missing and presumed dead'.
"It's just the holidays getting to me," Alex said, pretending that the words Ray had spoken didn't break her heart. "We would always spend them in the office together, since neither of us had any family to go to. Now I'm going to be in the office with a DCI who doesn't believe that women belong on the force."
"You know we could switch, if you want to. I'm supposed to work Boxing Day with Chris. No Dannell in sight."
Alex smiled. "As nice as that sounds, I can't. Dannell will give me hell and you know it."
Ray sighed. "You're right. Sodding bastard. God, I miss the Guv."
"We all do," Alex said softly, remembering back to January. Gene had simply gone to meet a snout. It was a perfectly routine matter of business and no one had thought anything of it, until three hours had passed and he hadn't come back.
Gene had said that he was meeting with Robert 'Rancid' Jameson. They had gone out to find the man, but Rancid had been lying dead by a skip, along with Gene's warrant card and Quattro key. They had found the Quattro a few streets away, but it was no longer the pristine red car Gene had loved so dearly. Someone had slashed all the tyres, and the windows had been smashed out. Dents covered the car, as though someone had hit it repeatedly with a sledgehammer. They had called out a missing person's report on him, but after that, it was up to Fenchurch West to get anything done.
However, with nothing to go on, they hadn't gotten very far.
After a few weeks, Gene's case had been deemed cold, and he was declared dead. This had been too much for Alex, and she had had to take a few weeks of compassionate leave.
It still agonised her to this day that Gene was gone. She had shared a level of trust with him that she had never shared with anyone before, not even Pete. He was the only one whom she had let her guard down around. He was able to see all of her imperfections, her weak moments, and she didn't mind him seeing them.
She had been the same for him. He had given her glimpses into his past as well, told her things that no one else on the team would know. On the top, he was all swagger and bullshit, but underneath that layer, he was genuine and caring. She knew that he cared about her. He had proven that more than once.
What she wasn't sure of – what she would never be sure of – was if he loved her or not.
Alex had realised that she loved him over a year before. They had been at a conference in Lewes on Bonfire Night. Together, they had gone to the giant bonfire that night. They had stood together, watching it burn, enjoying the festivities and talking amongst others. Later that night, she had seen him as the bonfire dwindled, staring into the flames. His face glowed in the firelight, and Alex had known he was miles away at that time. She knew that he was brooding over something, and she had known to leave him alone at that time. But it was that moment when she realized that she loved the man.
Someone had pushed into her then and she had looked away. By the time she looked up, Gene was no longer staring at the bonfire. Instead he was next to her, saying he was ready to leave.
When Gene had disappeared, she had still admitted nothing to him, too afraid of what he might do when she admitted such a thing. She was afraid that he wouldn't love her back. And now, he was gone and he would never know how she felt. She would never know how he felt. Any opportunity they had was over.
"Signorina, Signore," Luigi said gently. "I am closing now. You must leave."
Ray nodded at the man. Since Gene had disappeared, Luigi had gotten much less abuse from CID. It seemed as though they had only insulted him to make Gene happy.
"We're just leaving," Alex said, smiling at him. Luigi smiled back, albeit a little sadly. He was able to sense her moods, and could tell whether she needed to be babbled out of a sad mood, or to be left alone to brood.
"Buonanotte," Luigi said as they left.
"Night, ma'am," Ray said as she went to the stairs behind Luigi's.
"Night, Ray. I'll see you tomorrow."
"At least Dannell will be gone tomorrow. He's got a meeting at Scotland Yard."
"Thank God," she said, truly meaning it. She walked up the stairs to her flat, stopping outside of it, concerned. Her door was open. She left it unlocked sometimes, but it was never open when she got home. She wished Ray had not left yet. She would have gone down and asked him to accompany her upstairs, just to check the flat over. As it was, all she had was an Italian downstairs who had closed up the restaurant for the night. Still, being armed with a knife would be better than being armed with nothing.
Quietly, she backed away from the door and walked down the stairs that led into Luigi's restaurant. She knew this door would be unlocked until Luigi went upstairs for the night.
Alex entered the restaurant and went into the kitchen, where Luigi and his staff were cleaning up the dishes from the night and preparing for the next day. As she walked in, they all looked up.
"Signorina, are you okay?" Luigi asked, concerned.
"I think someone is in my flat," she said softly. "I need a knife or something. My gun is at work."
Luigi, looking worried, nodded and handed her a large knife. "I am coming with you, signorina," he said, grabbing a cleaver for himself. "I am not allowing you to go in there by yourself."
Alex nodded. A man and woman armed with two enormous sharp objects might be enough to put off someone with a gun.
They walked up the stairs silently, stopping at the top. "I'll go in first, Luigi," she whispered. "When we get in, stay quiet until we've investigated the whole flat."
Luigi nodded, holding his cleaver a little higher. Alex walked in front of him and pushed the door open silently, quietly entering into the flat.
She looked around the kitchen, seeing no one and walked into the living room.
"Bloody flaming Nora," she swore, making a mental note that she was spending too much time with Ray.
Luigi, right behind her, dropped his cleaver on the floor. He uttered several curse words in Italian, each one said with a little less force until he was completely silent.
A man was lying on her couch. His long, dirty-blond hair was stained with blood and his clothes were ripped and torn. They swamped his figure, and she could tell that the man had been starved for quite a while. His feet were bare, and there were open wounds over his knuckles. He was face down on her couch, facing toward the wall. One of his legs flopped off the sofa, and one arm was tucked underneath the pillow, the other bent next to his chest.
"Gene?" she whispered, dropping the enormous knife. It had to be him. She knew it had to be him. However, there was no response from the man lying on her couch.
Fear forgotten, Alex walked over to him and knelt down next to the couch, putting her hand on the man's back. She could easily feel his spine through his clothes. Alex could feel a lump in her throat, but swallowed it, saying Gene's name once more.
The man jumped suddenly, tensing up, his hands curling into fists. Alex backed away nervously, not anticipating the hostile reaction. However, as the man became aware of his surroundings, his tensed muscles slowly relaxed.
"Bolly?" he asked quietly. Alex's heart broke at the sound of his voice. It was soft and hoarse, carrying none of the authority it had done once before. His eyes were dark and hollow, and one was tinged green underneath. His nose looked as though it had been broken at least once, and there was a long cut down his cheek.
"Gene," she murmured, moving back closer to him. "We thought you were dead."
He shook his head, his long hair flying out. "Far from it. Got close a few times, but I persevered, me." He smiled bitterly. "They wouldn't let me die."
Tears were falling freely from Alex's eyes. Luigi was still standing next to the chair. Gene noticed both knives glinting on the floor and looked at her.
"Were you going to finish the job?" he asked.
Alex hoped he was joking, but his tone was so mild, so hurt, that it seemed impossible. He was looking at her almost as a man dying of thirst would look at water, the desperation evident in his eyes.
"We didn't know who was in my flat," she explained.
Gene raised his eyebrows in acknowledgement and nodded once. "Seems as good of reason as any," he muttered to himself. "I helped myself to some food and water," he said in a sudden topic change. "I hope that's okay."
"Of course it is," Alex responded, tears still flowing down her face. She pitied this man, a shadow of what he used to be. Usually Gene would have stormed in here, demanded food, and whined that it was only suitable for women and rabbits. Now, he was seeking her approval.
"Luigi," she said, still staring at Gene. "Do you have some leftovers from tonight that Gene might possibly be able to have?"
"Si, signorina," Luigi said, still staring in open mouthed shock. He picked up his utensils and backed out of the room, leaving the two of them alone.
"Gene, what happened to you?"
Gene's face hardened for a moment. "I went to meet Rancid, but he was dead by the time I got there. Bastards jumped me and knocked me out. I woke up in their pissing flat and they had the time of their lives beating the shit out of me."
"How did you get out?" she asked, knowing there was much more to the story that he wasn't telling her.
"I didn't. They threw me in the Thames. My hands and feet were tied together."
Alex just noticed the rope burn on his wrists. "How did you survive?" she whispered, wanting nothing more than to sit by him and hold him in her arms. However, he was giving off the feeling that he didn't want anyone to touch him, and she respected that.
"I flexed a bit when they were tying the ropes around my wrists. That made them loose enough that I could slip out. Once I got to shore, I untied my feet."
He lapsed into silence once more, staring at her, seeming to drink her in.
"You need to be checked out by hospital."
"Fat chance of that," he said, sounding like the old Gene for a moment. "I'm not going anywhere near one."
Alex bit her cheek, surprised at how quickly she could get annoyed at him. "Fine. You won't go tonight. But tomorrow, you are going to get checked out."
"Or what?" he challenged.
"There is no 'or what.' You are going. You've been missing for eleven months. You come back here, emaciated and bruised, and you think you're fine. All those open wounds on your hands? Who knows what the Thames water has in it?"
"Just put some ointment on my hands and I'll be good as new. Please, Alex. Don't make me see one."
Alex, shocked by the sudden use of the word 'please,' stopped and looked at him. There was something he was hiding, a real reason why he didn't want to go to hospital. And she was going to find out why.
There was a knock at the door as Luigi entered with a plate full of steaming food. "For you, signore Hunt. On the house."
"I hope so," Gene muttered. "I haven't got any bloody money." He nodded at the Italian in thanks, staring in wonder at the food. Alex walked Luigi out, thanking him for the food and coming up to defend her for the night. After she bid him off, she walked back to where Gene was slowly savouring the spaghetti.
"I haven't seen this much food in ages," he admitted to her. "Tastes amazing."
Alex felt her heart breaking for him again, but knew that eventually he would be back to normal. She would make sure of that.
"Gene," she said quietly. "How would you feel about staying with me for a few weeks?"
Sorry if this isn't up to the quality of my other fics. It's been a year since I've played with these two and to have Gene screwed up is not something I'm really used to...