Author: ED of Oblivion
Title: Graveyard Shift
Rating: PG (K+)
Genre: Humor
Summary: (RE0) Ever wonder where those freshly killed zombies disappear to after you leave the room? Billy and Rebecca find out… (One-shot)
Warnings: Small bit of gun violence and graphic gore, mild profanity, slight OOC, PWP.
Disclaimers: I do not own Resident Evil 0. Resident Evil 0 belongs to Capcom Entertainment. I am making no profit off of this fiction.
--------------------------------------------
Graveyard Shift
"Damn zombies." -MoonlitMeowth, fanfiction author
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Billy pushed open the door into the dining room, Rebecca close behind, leaving the lobby in their wake.
"Come on," Billy urged, starting to head towards a door on his left. "Once we find the key for that blue door, we might actually get somewhere—" Suddenly, he stopped in his tracks, scanning the space of the room in confusion. Rebecca raised an eyebrow.
"Billy? What's wrong?" The ex-marine looked puzzled; he scratched at the back of his head.
"I distinctly remember killing a zombie in here," he answered slowly.
Rebecca shrugged. "So?"
"So… where is it?" Billy gestured around him. While the place itself wasn't necessarily spotless, it was clean of any fresh blood, remains, or any other indication of recent zombie slayings. "Because I'm sure as hell it didn't just get up and wander off."
"Well… are you sure this is the same room you're thinking of?" Rebecca asked. "I mean, they're pretty much everywhere."
"Rebecca, this was one of the first rooms we went into," Billy argued. "Don't you remember? It was over in the corner and I asked you for the shotgun, but you wouldn't give it to me, so I kicked it and picked up that table leg right there and beat its head in, but that didn't work so you wasted a grenade on it instead?" Rebecca cocked her head to one side in a thinking pose.
"Ohhh," she said, recognition lighting her face for a brief second before mimicking Billy's confusion. "That is weird. It couldn't have wandered off somewhere else; it blew up and everything…"
"Yeah," Billy agreed, taking one more glance around the room. He hoisted the shotgun (now in his possession, thank you very much) over his shoulder and cleared his throat. "Well. Even if we see the damn thing again, we'll just blow it up some more."
"Aye-aye, sir!" Rebecca mock-saluted.
After another hearty round of wandering aimlessly through the rooms and hallways of the training facility, it wasn't long before the pair encountered another of the living dead. Billy cocked the shotgun and fired, blowing the zombie's head clean off. Said zombie buckled and fell to the floor, its unnaturally warm blood spilling messily onto the hallway carpet.
"Annnd another!" Billy crowed triumphantly. The slightly impending threat gone, the two continued on down the hallway, Billy searching for more shells on him to reload the shotgun as they turned the corner. Suddenly, Rebecca caught his arm, looking behind them.
"Wait, Billy, it looked like that zombie was holding something," she said, turning around. As she re-rounded the corner, something else caught her eye, and she stopped. Billy followed, mirroring her expression as they both watched a zombie appear at the opposite corner of the hallway. The sound of squeaking wheels accompanied his ghostly moans; he was dragging something large behind him, and neither Billy nor Rebecca wanted to find out what.
"Reload, Billy," Rebecca urged. Billy continued to search his pockets, so far unable to find his box of shotgun shells. The zombie was getting closer, dressed in a bloodied Umbrella maintenance uniform, Rebecca finally noticed; he must have gotten attacked during his shift, the poor guy…
"Billy, hurry." Rebecca kept her voice calm. Billy was still searching.
"I'm not the only one with a weapon, girl, use your handgun!"
"But I'm out of ammo!"
"Oh, what, are you kidding me? Since when did you run out of ammo?"
"Quite a while back, actually. But you looked like you were having so much fun with the shotgun; I didn't want to just stop you!"
Billy grit his teeth, about to spit out another rant, when he noticed just how close the zombie was getting; it was just in front of the headless zombie sprawled on the floor, and getting closer still. The squealing wheels suddenly halted as the former maintenance worker let go of whatever he was dragging behind him, and slowly raised something over his head.
"Uuuhhnn…"
"Oh, God, Billy, he's got a mop!"
"Damn it! Where the hell are those shells?"
The approaching undead stopped just next to the fallen zombie; slowly, it raised the mop higher over its head, moaning grossly. Billy and Rebecca could only watch as the janitor zombie twisted its arms and brought down the mop—
—onto the oozing puddle of blood and began to clean.
Billy and Rebecca simply stood, stumped, their jaws slacking slightly.
"Um…"
"…Do we even bother killing that one?"
"Uh… no. No, just leave that one… C'mon, let's just keep going…"
"Uuuhhgnn…"
--------------------------------------------
FIN
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Good endings are for losers. XP
Seriously, do you guys ever wonder where those zombies go after you kill them and then come back after leaving the room? I do. And here's my answer. The zombie janitor! No, not janitors — janitor. There's only one, and he's everywhere. XD
This didn't come out exactly how I wanted it to. I still think it's enjoyable; just not the same way I envisioned it. My original idea was for no one to actually see the janitor, that he just comes into the room after Billy and Rebecca leave, but I guess I forgot as I was writing. (sweats) And I'm too lazy to go back and write it again, no matter how short the whole thing is.
This isn't supposed to be a masterpiece; just an evening of boredom. All I ask is that you try to entertain it.
Enjoy! :D
And Happy Halloween, you guys.
-EDWARD-