Every day consists of twenty-four hours so that people can be secure in the knowledge that even the worst days must come to an end. When the sun sets and you lay down to fall asleep you can always rest easy with the thought that things will look better in the morning. Even if you're lying to yourself the lie makes it just a little bit easier to close you eyes and bring the day to an end.
But the nights when you can't close your eyes, those nights are never ending.
Beth Greene had had her share of sleepless nights in her eighteen years. She'd had nights after the outbreak where nightmares kept her awake, where every noise was a dead person coming to eat her. Some nights would always be worse than others. Some nights didn't just end when the sun came up.
The night that the farm was attacked and over run was one of them. Even if she could have slept in the truck sandwiched between T-Dog and Lori she felt as though she would never sleep again. She kept rubbing her hand hoping to erase the phantom feel of Patricia's death grip on the last thing she thought could have kept her alive. Beth could not even shut her eyes because the second she so much as blinked Patricia's face swam in front of her closed lids, walkers tearing out her neck. She could not even bring herself to worry about anyone else at first so haunted was she by the memory.
She stared out the truck window at the darkness and felt as if her whole life had gone up in flames with the barn. As the sun rose and the bleakness of their situation was thrown into the light of day she collapsed against Lori who clutched her almost as tightly as Patrica had. She could not bring herself to join in T-Dog's and Lori's debate of whether to turn back or keep going. Honestly she was just afraid of turning back and coming up empty. If they kept going she would likely never see her family or Jimmy again, but if they turned back she might find out that she never could. She didn't want to kill her hope that her family might still be alive somewhere.
After they did turn back Beth stared out the window again. She was the first to see the car on the road before them. The three in the truck sighed with relief that at least someone else had made it out alive. They all tried in vain to make out who was in the car. They couldn't see through the blood stained tinted windows to see anything more than at least two people. Beth crossed her fingers that one of them was her family. As they neared the area where they had left the supplies for the little girl who had been in her family's barn a motorcycle cut in front of the car before them and they let out a laugh of joy at seeing Daryl and Carol astride it.
Seeing Maggie and her father as she tumbled out of the truck filled her heart with so much relief she thought she might explode. She wanted to rush at them but found she couldn't get her legs to work that fast. She had been so convinced that they were dead that seeing them alive was filling her with shock. Collapsing against her father's chest and feeling Maggie's arm go around her she felt the dark of the night begin to recede as tears filled her eyes.
The winter they spent on the road before they found the prison was full of many sleepless nights. Often she was too cold to sleep for more than a few minutes at a time before she woke up shivering. It didn't matter how many blankets they found or how hot a fire they built she constantly shivered, her teeth chattering so much she often tasted blood from biting her lip. One night was particularly cold. The group huddled in a clearing in the woods, a plastic tarp underneath them to protect them from the snow. Fires burned on either side of the tarp and Beth curled in a ball underneath a tattered plaid blanket. Her eyes refused to close and she stared into the flames before her, watching them twirl and flicker in an unrehearsed dance. Finally she gave up on the idea of sleep and sat up wrapping her blanket tighter around her shoulders. Looking around she searched for whoever was on guard duty, finding Daryl propped against a tree a few feet a way. Careful not to rustle the plastic of the tarp to much she crept towards him, cautiously stepping over the sleeping figures of the group. His eyes flickered to her briefly before looking back out into the darkness of the woods.
Sighing she sank down next to him curling her knees to her chest and wrapping her blanket around them, cursing the holes in her jeans from when she had tripped over a tree root a few days back.
"I can keep watch." she whispered to him. It wasn't like she was going to sleep anyway so why not do something productive?
Daryl kept staring forward. "I got it." he muttered back in his gruff voice. Beth looked at him out of the corner of her eye and saw that he looked about as able to sleep as she did. Sighing she shuffled backwards to lean her back against the tree trunk next to him, the side of her body inches from his. He looked at her once before continuing to stare into the darkness.
As the night dragged on she felt herself grow numb with cold. She drew her hands up to her mouth to blow on them, her teeth beginning to chatter again. After a few minutes of this Daryl reached over and placed his arms around her shoulders pulling her close against her side. Beth looked up at him in confusion as his other arm moved the blanket he had over his legs to cover her as well.
"You keep shaking like that you're gonna bring a horde of walkers down on us." he explained not taking his eyes off their surrounding woods. The warmth from his body eventually soaked into her and for the first time in weeks she didn't feel like a block of ice. The night dragged on with every sound seeming like imminent death but for once, with Daryl's arm still resting around her shoulders, she felt safe.
As the sun rose slowly to cast its light down on them Daryl removed his arm and passed her his knife. "I'm gonna catch a few minutes of shut eye. You good?" she took the knife with cold fingers and for the next hour before the others awoke she alternated watching the woods and stealing glances at the man sleeping by her feet.
On the night that the Governor attacked the prison and beheaded her father she could not have slept if she had wanted to. Her eyes were filled with the sight of her father's head being removed from its body and her feet were not allowed to rest. Daryl had pulled her out of the prison and as they ran her shock began to wear off. She followed after him panting as they ran through the woods walkers always close on their heels.
They never felt safe enough to stop, nor did they want to leave the prison to far behind them so they ran in an ever growing circle with the prison at its center and waited to come across another survivor. As darkness fell Daryl decided that they needed to stop before they both passed out from exhaustion the way they had in the field earlier. Wordlessly he built a fire that they huddled in front of as Beth quietly said good-bye to her father in her mind. Eventually she could not sit still any longer and when Daryl refused to go with her to keep looking she grabbed her weapons and left. Only the thought of walkers stopped her from stomping her feet as she headed back out into the woods. Minutes later she heard something behind her and spun, knife in hand. Daryl looked at her with a raised eyebrow and they continued on in silence. The night grew ever darker as they grew quieter, each retreating deep inside their selves. As the sun rose the next day and they began to track other survivors she felt a tiny ray of hope build inside her. The ray was extinguished as they came across the bloody remains at the train tracks and she finally burst into tears admitting to herself that they were all alone. Beth could feel her will to live beginning to diminish as it had the day she slit her wrist open. In a desperate attempt to keep the blackness at bay she held onto the thought that somewhere there had to be other survivors. She held onto that thought as desperately as one held onto a piece of debris adrift on the ocean. The sun shone down on them brightly but as she stared at the gory remains in front of her it might as well have been the dead of night.
Weeks passed in a sullen silent blur as she and Daryl slowly gave up on finding anyone else. By unspoken agreement they turned their backs on the prison and headed out into the woods. One night a thunderstorm raged above them drawing walkers into the woods and staggering around in search of the noise. Knowing they had to get someplace safe they headed onto the road in search of a car. The one they found they couldn't get started so Daryl motioned for them to get inside the trunk which he tied shut, leaving just a crack open for them to see through. Beth held her breath as tightly as she clutched her knife as the walkers shambled by them. Their moans and groans filled the night air as thunder rolled over head. At some point in the night rain began to fall, the pattering of the drops as they hit the trunk added to the clamor. At some point when a large group of walkers was moving by Beth let out a small whimper. Thankfully thunder crashed overhead at the same time disguising it but in the lightening shining through the trunk she saw Daryl turn to look at her. He moved one hand off his cross bow and reached for her, pulling her tight against his chest. Beth almost collapsed against him in the relief of being held after weeks of being stone walled but his arms did not wrap around her in an embrace. One hand still clutching the crossbow the other covered her mouth until the horde of walkers shuffled by.
Beth felt her heartbeat in her throat as he crushed her to him tighter and breathed slowly through her nose until the group passed them. Slowly Daryl removed his hand from her mouth. For a moment Beth stayed against his chest, closing her eyes and relishing in the feel of another human's body pressed against her. She wished for the night in the woods when Daryl had held her close to prevent her from shivering. This Daryl was colder than any night that winter had ever had. Slowly she moved away from him to the other side of the trunk, she felt his eyes follow her the whole way.
The sun rose before the storm ended and they huddled in the trunk for what felt like hours before Daryl slowly untied the bandana and let them out. The cold terror of that night did not end for two days until the light of the burning house filled the sky. The fire burned away not only the darkness outside but the darkness in Daryl as well.
More time passed and they began to fall into a comfort level that she had never shared with anyone before. As the nights grew colder he began to hold her shivering form as he had that night so long ago. The warmth of his body always put her at ease no matter how terrible their lives had become. No matter how surly he acted she was always glad that she had not been left out here alone.
One night after spraining her ankle they took refuge in a funeral parlor. Despite the pain in her ankle Beth found herself having one of the best nights of her life. Playing the piano and singing relaxed her and the sight of all the food made her happier than she had been in months.
As Daryl stared into her eyes in the light of candles she began to realize exactly what they had become to each other. A bright flare of happiness unlike anything she had ever felt burned through her. It was extinguished only minutes later as Daryl screamed from the front door at her to run. Leaving him behind was the hardest thing she ever had to do. She got outside and made to run around to the front to help him with the walkers. Her ankle slowed her down and she never even saw the man standing in the shadows of the house as he hit her in the back of the head with a shovel.
She woke up in darkness an intermediate time later her head pounding fiercely. Stifling a groan she made to sit up only to realize that her hands were tied tightly together as were her ankles, one of which still throbbed.
Her eyes slowly adjusted to the darkness and she realized that she had to be on the floor of a closet somewhere. Her heart began to pound in time with her head as she wondered what had happened to not only her, but to Daryl. Cautiously she managed to sit up and feel around her for something to cut the ropes with. Her fingers had just brushed over a lose nail in the hardwood floor beneath her when the doors slid open and light assaulted her eyes.
"Oh look whose awake!" a male voice cried happily. Beth blinked up at him against the brightness and saw a small man in a plaid shirt grinning down at her with broken teeth. She scooted back against the wall and pressed herself flat against it as the man reached down and grabbed her upper arms pulling her to her feet. She bit back a cry as pressure was put on her ankle.
"C'mon boys! Let's have some fun!" the man cried over his shoulder to the open door as he unsheated the knife at his hip and moved to cut the ropes at her ankles. Beth knew exactly what he meant by 'fun' and felt herself grow cold at the thought. The ropes snapped free of her ankles and a fire suddenly filled her.
There was no way in hell she was going to let these men touch her. They would not steal one of the last things she had left in this world. She would make sure of that or die trying.
Footsteps were approaching the room as the man before her grabbed her arms again. She reared her neck back and head butted him hard, she blinked back stars as his nose cracked and he began to curse. Knowing she had only seconds to spare she turned and grabbed the knife from his lose hand hold. She twisted it in her hands and got it caught on the ropes which she began to saw at. She flinched as the knife bit into her flesh but she kept going. Wiping blood from his face the man growled at her and lunged just as she managed to cut the ropes binding her wrists. His hand was inches from her neck as she swung her arm and stuck the knife just below his windpipe.
The man's eyes went wide and she pulled the knife from his neck to let him drop to the floor where he lay coughing up blood and wheezing through the hole in his windpipe. She lunged to the door of the room which she locked against the pounding of fists that had just reached it. Turning back to the man on the floor she grabbed the gun from his back pocket and searched him for any other weapons as someone began to throw themselves against the door. Beth searched the room frantically and saw a window. She darted to it and managed to push it halfway open but even as she did so she knew she'd never get away fast enough, not on this ankle. The man on the floor stopped breathing and Beth knew she had only minutes before he turned and the door was broken down.
Her eyes landed then on a cabinet in the corner of the room. She darted to it and threw open the bottom doors, thanking whoever might be listening that they were empty. She squeezed herself inside and shut the doors just as the walker on the floor rose its head and the door to the room broke open. She clutched her stolen gun tightly in her hand as someone walked into the room and cursed at seeing their friend on the floor.
"Dumb fucker. What kind of man can't handle a teenage girl?" he cursed and there was a sound as if he had kicked the man. Suddenly there was a terrible scream and the sound of tearing flesh. Beth closed her eyes and held her breath as the man outside continued to scream. There was two gunshots then and she could hear the panting breath of another man.
"Fuck. Fuck fuck." he whispered and Beth held her breath as he walked into the room. "Where are you bitch?" he called in a shaking voice. There were no other noises in the room. Beth crossed her fingers that he was the only one left in their group and slowly she eased the cabinet door open a crack. The man, well more of a boy really, had his back to her his eyes drawn to the half open window. Slowly she opened the door enough to get the gun out and clicked off the safety, holding her breath.
The boy froze at the sound and turned to her but by that point she had already fired the shot. The bullet caught him straight between the eyes and he toppled over backwards, bits of blood and brains staining the wallpaper behind him.
Scrambling out of the cabinet Beth quickly searched the two new bodies and stole their weapons before heading out into the rest of the house. It was empty of others and she found a bag that she filled with food and water that was piled on the counter. A quick glimpse out the window showed her that several walkers were approaching the house drawn from the gunshots. Swinging her back on her shoulders and tightening her grip on one of her new guns she moved to head outside when her eyes fell on car keys by the front door. Another look out the window showed her a lone car parked ten feet from the house. She tore open the door and managed to sprint to the car as best as she could on her ankle. She fumbled the keys once as she tried to unlock the door and cursed as she stooped to pick them up off the wet grass. A walker reached out for her, fingers brushing her chest before she shot it through the head. This time she managed to get the door unlocked. Walkers began to swarm the car as she peeled out backwards crushing two behind her. She had never been more thankful for Shawn teaching her to drive the truck when she was twelve as she swerved onto the road walkers turning to follow after her.
She drove a few miles away before she had to pull over she was shaking so bad. Locking the doors she shrugged off her pack off food and tossed it in the seat next to her. Looking over her shoulder at the rest of the car she was treated with the sight of a lot of garbage but nothing useful. The car had half a tank of gas but no map. She leaned her head back against the seat's headrest and took a few deep breaths before starting the car again. She had to find that funeral home and more importantly she had to find Daryl.
Night fell and having no idea where she was going she took random roads and hoped she would stumble upon something familiar. As the car's tank grew lower and lower she took a turn in the road. Her headlights suddenly shone on a man standing in the middle of the road, a weapon pointed directly at her.
Slamming on her breaks her heart pounded wildly against her chest and she moved to reach for the gun at her side before her eyes realized exactly who she was seeing. Letting out a cry of surprise she flung open her car door and moved to jump out. Her weight landed on her bad ankle and she collapsed against the car door.
"Daryl." she breathed out as she got her feet underneath her. Leaning on the car for balance and staring at the man before her whose eyes had finally adjusted to the light enough to see her. Slowly he lowered his crossbow to his side and stared at her. Time seemed to both stop and fly by as they gazed at each other before he suddenly rushed forward. She hobbled out to meet him and they crashed into each other in a hug that lifted her off her feet.
Her arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him tight to her as his arms crushed her body. She could feel the metal of the crossbow biting into her back but she didn't care. He was alive. Daryl was in her arms and he was alive. Nothing else mattered, not now.
Slowly he lowered her to the asphalt and she gazed up at him. A cut on his cheek caught her eye. Rising her hand to it she tilted his face into the light.
"How?" she asked softly as his hand reached up to cup hers.
"Met this group of guys on the road. Turns out there's not that many good people out here after all." he said with a shrug. "How'd you get away?" he asked softly.
Beth shrugged with a small sad smile. "I stooped to their level." she admitted on a whisper. "I guess I'm not that good of a person either." she looked down to hide the tears that had sprung to her eyes.
Daryl's finger suddenly went beneath her chin to raise her gaze to his. "You're the best person left out here." he whispered closing the small distance between them with a kiss.
As Beth wrapped her arms around him she felt the darkness she had been living in finally began to recede. His kiss rose through her like a sunrise and she felt the twinge of something inside her she had thought was long gone, hope. As he lifted her off her feet again and the sky lightened around them she began to believe that even the darkest nights must come to an end.