I do not own Hetalia or any of it's characters
This is just something I wrote...it's pretty freaking random. I am living proof that you do not have to be on crack to write crack fiction :)
Enjoy!
Reviews are highly appreciated!
The birds were chirping and the sun was shimmering and smiling brightly in the sky above that morning. "Ahhh." France rose from his slumber, stretched his arms and yawned. "L'amour is in the air this morning!" he sighed, dreamily. He shook the shoulder of the sleeping lump beside him. "Wake up, Romano."
Romano's brown eyes flittered open and he turned to face France. His eyes widened and she shot up from the bed. "What the fuck am I doing here? And why am I naked?" he shouted.
France tilted his silky, blond head to the side. "I thought you know."
"Blasphemy! You bastard! You drugged me! Fuuuuck!" The naked Romano frantically ran back and forth across the spacious room.
"Romano, would you kindly turn your voice down a little?"
"Like fucky fuck I will!" the furious Italian screamed
France sighed.
Romano suddenly collapsed and burst into a fit of tomato sized tears. "What if you gave me crabs? Is escargot an STD? What about AIDS? Oh dear God, what if I'm pregnant?"
"You're not pregnant."
"Oh my tomato! You got me fucking pregnant!"
"N- "
"Fuck you! Bastard!" Without putting his clothes on, Romano jolted from the fluffy, pink bedroom.
France exhaled. He should have foreseen this from Romano. France rose from his bed and crossed to the window then clapped his hands together twice. A few seconds later, a few sparrows flew into the room from the forest outside carrying a pair of red pants and three blue jays fluttered in with a blue shirt and all the forest birds began to dress him. Following this, two doves draped a blue cloak around France's shoulders. After the birds had finished, he turned to the mirror and hummed in approval. "I am beautiful."
France spun to face the fluffy white bird who was his stylist. "Am I beautiful, Pierre?"
"Tweet tweet tweet!"
"Oh!" France sighed. "I am flattered!" He turned back towards his room. "What am I going to do today?" Before he could finish this thought, his phone rang with a ring that announced Spain was ringing. France jubilantly skipped to the phone and pressed answer.
"Salut!"
"What did you do to Romano?" Spain demanded.
"Nothing! It's more of what he did to me!" France chuckled.
"This isn't funny!"
"I know that it is not! Mon dieu!"
"I am going to get you!"
"Oh, Spain. You are so cute when you are angry."
There was only silence on the other line.
"Spain?"
"I'm going to get you." Click
France drew the phone from his ear and stared at the screen which was the French flag. "This isn't good."