A Time to Heal

by D. M. Evans

Trying to prove he’s not handicapped, Ed insists on a nice ‘normal’ play day in the snow.

A Time to Heal

The Recovery Series # 2; Winter

D M Evans

Disclaimer - not mine, all characters belong to Hiromu Arakawa et al, Square Enix and funimition.

Pairing – none, Ed/Winry/Al friendship

Rating – T

Time Line – manga based, no real spoilers provided you know how Ed and Al were injured, takes place in the winter after Ed first gets his new leg

Summary – Trying to prove he's not handicapped, Ed insists on a nice 'normal' play day in the snow.

Author's Note – This was written for the 4 purposes community. Thanks to Mjules and Evillittledog for the edits.

"I don't want to just sit here." Ed pouted, staring out the frosted window. The night before had brought the kind of snowfall children everywhere salivated over. A thick, pristine white blanket lay over the town. Ed could hear the neighboring kids playing and he wanted to join them.

"And just what do you plan on doing?" Pinako looked up from the knitting she used to keep her fingers nimble.

"I can go out," he said stubbornly, thumping a hand down on his thigh. The automail leg he had only just been given jumped with the motion.

"I see. You can barely walk around in the house and you want to go out in the snow," Pinako scoffed, turning back to the sweater-in-progress

"I can do it." Ed's chin jutted out, his eyes turning to slits of sunlight.

"I'll go with him, Granny," Al said from where he sat in the corner, rubbing Den's belly.

"If he's going to ruin our brand new automail, I'm going to keep an eye on him," Winry proclaimed. Leaning over the back of the couch, automail book in hand, she narrowed her eyes at Ed who glared back unrepentantly.

Pinako threw up her hands. "Just don't cry when you get cold."

"I won't," Ed promised and the old woman raised an eyebrow at that, wishing the eleven year old would just acknowledge his pain. It might be healthier for him.

"Come on, Brother." Al put his big metal hand under his brother's remaining arm to help him up. Ed wasn't really able to push Al away but Winry thought he would if he could. He didn't want help or pity, almost pathologically so. What Ed wanted least was to be told what his limitations were. Winry knew he wanted to be whole and healed and he wanted it now. Things were still strained between him and her after she told him two days ago that he should take more time to relax and let Al bring him books to research for ways to cure themselves instead of trying to drag himself over to their house to find them.

Winry wasn't sure why that upset Ed so much. Maybe the mere suggestion he needed help had set him off. Ed had always been the 'I want it now' sort and she could feel his pain at not being able to instantly fix the damage done to him and Al. Then there was the guilt he so obviously felt about what had happened. Winry just wished that Ed would find another place to vent rather than her but until he did, she would bear up to him because she hoped that when the anger was played out, he'd start to heal.

Ed valiantly tried to walk without stumbling. Winry knew he'd fall outside, especially with only one arm to balance himself. Ed barely had any control of his leg. He was still using his thigh to do most of the movement, flicking the leg out at the hip. The knee and ankle were barely bending or bending at the wrong time, sometimes slamming into the ground, other times missing it and pitching the boy onto his face. Ed was too stubborn to take the time to let himself master the skill. He wanted to walk and run at this very moment. Delays were unacceptable.

He barely tolerated Winry's assistance at pulling on his boots and only because he couldn't do it one-handed. She pinned up the sleeve of his coat so wind wouldn't race up the flapping sleeve and she caught the heartrendingly sad look in his eyes as her movements acknowledged that a part of him was still missing.

"When do you think I'll get my arm?" Ed asked quietly, eyes downcast.

Winry rested a hand on his new metal shoulder, barely able to feel it through his sweater and coat. "Let's get you used to using your leg first, Ed."

He almost protested. She could see the words forming but then he didn't. He just sighed and started for the door, managing to walk with increasing ease. Winry paused in the doorway, looking at the immaculate snow cover marked only with some rabbit and bird tracks and some crazed patterns from Den. What had that dog been up to? The pines held fluffy clusters of snow. All the other kids they had heard from the neighboring fields seemed to have already gone inside, or more likely, had gone down to the mill creek. It was fun to run and slide on the ice but even Ed didn't suggest trying that. At least he was acknowledging some sort of limitation.

"So pretty," she breathed, her breath crystallizing on the wind.

"Such a girlie thing to say," Ed snorted, bullying his way out into the snow followed more sedately by Al.

Winry watched him walk, a wide base of gait to keep himself steadied. The automail barely bent as Ed did all the work from his hip. "Ed, bend that knee."

Ed glanced back at her then down at his leg. She could see the concentration on his face, his brow beetling just under the brim of his stocking cap, as Ed tried to force the knee to bend. He stumbling along then fell into a drift.

"Brother!" Al scurried to help Ed up and Ed batted his hands away.

"I can get up on my own," he snarled and Al shrank back.

Winry scowled and ran over to the brothers. She booted Ed hard in the butt. His eyes widened in shock. "You don't yell at your brother. We know this is hard on you, Ed, but you can't keep being mean to everyone." She kicked snow at him. "You're the worst patient ever."

To her surprise, Ed didn't yell back. His eyes went wet and glistening. Feeling awful, Winry flopped down in the snow and tossed her arms around his neck, crushing him to her. "I'm sorry, Ed. I know you're scared," she whispered, "But you keep pushing me, Al and Granny away. We understand you want to be independent but you're hurting us. Don't you think it hurts us to see you injured this bad? Do you know many nightmares I had after that night, after seeing you with blood all over? Granny didn't want me to see your wounds but she couldn't save you alone. I thought you were going to die, for days and days, I couldn't sleep and now, when I know you're going to be all right, I still want to help you. You need to let us do that, Edward."

Ed buried his face against her neck, hiding in the woolly scarf. She thought maybe he was crying but she knew better. This was Edward and boys didn't cry. "I'm sorry, Winry. I didn't mean to make you scared." His voice sounded rough.

Winry rubbed his back, looking up at Alphonse. She wished she could read emotions on his metal face but all she got was a vague sense that he felt so left out. She also felt somehow guilty at making Ed upset but he needed to hear it. Of course, if he actually cried, he'd never recover his pride. "Just let us help a little." She sat back and to break the mood, yanked his stocking cap down over his eyes and nose then jumped to her feet.

"Al! Kill her!" Ed squalled, yanking off his cap by the bright blue and purple tassel.

Instead Al picked Ed up and set him on his feet. "Do it yourself, brother, if you can catch her."

"Yeah, Ed, come on, let's see you move that leg." Winry danced in the snow back and forth, taunting him.

Ed lurched after her; sometimes, as they played, he even got his leg moving almost to trotting speed. He fell several times but each time Al picked him up and got him going again. Ed finally gave up, panting against a pine tree. He reached out with his one gloved hand and balled up the snow that ladened a bough. "Oh, Winry," he called and pelted her when she turned to look.

Winry wiped the snow from her face and grinned evilly. "Automail or not, I'm taking you down." She charged after him.

Ed tried to backpedal and fell. "Al!"

"You started it, Brother." Al just shook his head and settled in to watch.

Ed shrieked as Winry pounced on him, half burying him in the snow. Sitting on his belly, she hit him at will with snow. Ed flailed and spewed words his mother would have washed his mouth out with soap for but Winry didn't care. He seemed like his old self then. Finally, he snared her scarf with his teeth, yanking it so it gapped then dumped snow down her jacket.

Winry bounced on his belly then got up. "Edward! That's cheating."

"How could it be cheating?" Ed demanded, his cheeks like apples from the cold. "You're beating up on a one-armed boy!"

"Yeah, well you started it." She kicked snow at him.

"And I finished it." Ed looked up at her smugly.

Winry raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"

"Brother, aren't you cold yet, sitting in the snow like that?" Al broke in before they could start really squabbling again.

"No," Ed said but they knew it was a lie. They could see it in his eyes and Winry knew better. The metal had to be conducting cold straight into his bones.

Al helped him up anyhow. "I was getting cold just looking at you." Another lie they all let pass, knowing full well that Al could feel nothing but no one wanted to think about that.

"I'm fine. I want to go sled riding," Ed pronounced, gesturing to the hill behind the house.

"Are you determined to break your automail?" Winry asked, thrusting her fists against her hips.

"I won't." Ed started tromping for the hill.

"You don't have a sled, silly," Winry reminded him.

"You're bringing it," he replied with a shrug.

"Al, you'd better wait down at the bottom. If Ed falls off, make sure he doesn't suffocate in a drift," Winry said wearily. "Though it might be easier that way."

"I heard that!" Ed growled and Al tried to hide a snicker.

Winry snagged the toboggan from the side of the house and started dragging it. Catching up to Edward, she slipped her free arm around his waist. "Lean on me if you need to."

"Shouldn't have to lean on a girl," Ed pouted but he did just the same as he struggled up the hill.

Winry was able to slow him down, keep him from being too impatient. Ed didn't fall, even if he stumbled occasionally. He got his knee bending, trying to navigate the drifts. He was sweating by the time they got to the top but he was starting to master moving his leg. "Get on behind me." Winry sat on the sled.

"But I wanna steer!" Ed protested.

"You just don't want to admit you're too short to see over me." Winry grinned up at him. When Ed's screaming and flailing at being called short toppled him, she yanked him onto the sled behind her. He grabbed hold one-handedly and they didn't make it halfway down before he fell off, taking her with him.

They never made it more than half way down after several tries. Al moved to the hill's mid point just so he could be there faster to get Ed up out of the snow. Winry wanted Ed to give in but he seemed to be having fun in spite of his absolute determination to make it to the bottom. She dragged the toboggan up once again.

Ed leapt on before she could. "You suck. You can't drive."

"Edward, I do not suck!" Winry got behind him, trying to wrestle him off. Ed managed to kick off with his flesh leg and over the hill they went. Winry squalled and latched onto him. "Ed, you can't steer one handed."

"Can, too!"

"You're heading right for Al!" she shrieked.

Ed yanked on the steering ropes and managed to plow sideways. Al, seeing the danger, started to run but the heavy armor didn't move well in snow. The toboggan crashed into him, knocking the boy down, then slid on top of him, hanging up on the metal shoulder spikes. All three kids screamed their way down the hill until Al crashed headlong into Den's dog box. Winry and Ed were catapulted off of him. Ed sat up in the drift, looking around. "Hey, I made it all the way to the bottom without falling off!" Ed said brightly. "You okay, Al?"

Winry growled and grabbed Ed by his scarf. She toppled him back over into the snow and sat on him, pressing his face into the cold fluff. "You could have killed us. I told you, you couldn't steer one handed."

Ed squirmed to get his face out of the snow, kicking and wiggling hard under his friend until he wormed free. "Oh, like you can steer a toboggan in the first place." Realizing his brother hadn't responded, Ed added. "Seriously, Al, you okay?"

Alphonse plucked the broken toboggan off his spikes, straightened out his helmet's tassel then got up and opened his chest plate, burying his brother in the snow that had filled him up. "What do you think?"

Ed wiped snow from his eyes. "Aww, Al."

"We wrecked the dog box," Al said then squatted down, drawing an array in the snow. He fixed the wood of the box and the toboggan. "Are you two trying the hill again?"

Ed shook his head. "I think I got snow up my shoulder. It hurts." They could see the cost of that admission reflecting in his gold eyes.

Winry and Al helped him up. They were all snow-encrusted as they shuffled towards the house. Balls of ice decorated the fringe of Winry's long hair but it was worth it. Ed's mood seemed a little lighter, even if they had flattened Al.

Granny seemed to be expecting their return. A big fire raged in the stone fireplace and she had pulled two chairs and a stool for Al in front of it. They could smell hot chocolate wafting in from the kitchen. She brought out two cups crammed with her own homemade marshmallows. Winry knew Ed probably felt a little guilty about drinking it in front of Al because she did.

"So, he didn't break anything," Granny observed as the kids kicked out of their boots and snowy clothes. "Besides my dog house."

"And my head. It's probably dented," Al said, sounding like he was pouting.

"I can fix that, Al. I just need a pencil," Ed said, heading for the fire.

Granny caught his arm. "In there. Get out of the wet clothes. I have a robe for you and some boxers." She pointed to the bathroom. "Winry, your stuff is in the patient room."

Once they were changed into fluffy robes and slippers, the kids sat down at the fire with their hot chocolate. Winry looked over at Ed. "Let me see your shoulder, Ed. I want to be sure you didn't get snow where you shouldn't have."

Ed sighed and opened his robe, letting it slide off his silver shoulder. He resolutely kept his eyes on the fire and Winry peered at the automail port. Granny watched over her shoulder, making sure the girl did it right. She pulled the cap off the end where the arm would eventually attach and gently probed it with a finger to make sure it was snow-free. Ed hissed just a little as it registered pain along his nerves.

"Doesn't look bad," Granny pronounced then she went into a patient room. She came back with a hot water bottle and draped it over Ed's shoulder. "That should help."

"Thanks, Granny," Ed said, sucking in a marshmallow.

"Do you feel better now, Ed? You look…happier," Winry said cautiously.

Ed balanced the cup on his metal knee and looked over at her. "I think for the first time I really feel like I'm going to heal. I know you and Granny keep telling me I'm doing okay but it seems so slow. Today, I felt like king of the hill, even if I flattened my brother. Sorry Al." He shot Al an apologetic look.

Al's metal shoulders rolled. "It's okay, Brother. You've always been dangerous when it comes to controlling things that move."

Ed snorted, rolling his eyes.

"You're doing better than you know, Edward," Winry said. "It usually takes two to three years to get used to automail. You're doing it in a matter of months. It's amazing really but I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. You're the most stubborn person I know."

"And I have the best automail mechanic in the world and I bet when you get older and train more, you'll be even better than Granny," Ed said brightly.

Winry put her arms around him, nearly sloshing chocolate down his back. "Thank you, Ed!" she squealed then kissed his cheek.

Ed went pink to his hairline. "Aww, don't do that. Everyone knows girl kisses give you cooties."

Winry sat back with a humph. "No, that's boy kisses."

"No kissing period!" Granny called as she headed into the kitchen.

Ed pouted then shot his brother a guilty look. Al, even knowing Ed had once fought him for marriage rights to Winry, said nothing. He was just pleased to see Ed almost acting like his old self.

"You did good out there, Ed," Winry said. "But no more sled riding for a while. If you break that leg, Granny will break your butt."

Ed nodded sagely. "I know. But I'd like to go back out later and we can all build a snowman. Al, you're really good at that."

"Thanks." Al almost seemed to smile. "Are we working together or is it a competition like you usually turn it into, Brother?"

"No competition. You two cheat and use alchemy," Winry said, wagging a finger.

"That is not cheating," Ed said in his defense. "But no, I want to do something we all can do together."

Winry smiled, setting her mug down. She put a hand on both brothers' knees. "That sounds like a lovely idea."

"Aww man, don't make it sound all girlie," Ed moaned.

She slapped him in the chest. "Okay only no shaping boy parts on the snowman like last time."

"I was doing a self portrait in snow," Ed replied proudly.

"Then why was it so tall?" Al asked and Ed sputtered, his automail leg kicking wildly.

Winry just sat back and let them fight it out. For a moment, it felt like it did before their mother had died, before they had gone away only to come back and do this to themselves. For a moment, she felt like she could breathe easy. For the first time, she was positive her friends would one day heal.