Disclaimer: I do not own nor claim to own this franchise or any of its characters.
Forever
How long will you live? How long will you be remembered? What is your mark on this god forsaken world? I am eternal. I will never be forgotten. I will change the very face of the world. They said nothing lives forever when I was just a boy, but look at how much older I have gotten since I was told that. I have met every relevant figure in time. I have fought in every major war. I have owned every tyrant, every cult, every corporation and I yet am not satisfied.
They say that being immortal is not what it's cracked up to be. You get bored, you get lonely. I have never experienced either thing. I was there when Marilyn Monroe learnt to sing. Impressed yet? Like I said, I never got lonely, perhaps that could be my raving antisocial personality. Or maybe I'm just a sociopath. I was in Pearl Harbor when it was bombed. I was in Rome while it burned. I was Helena of Troy, the father of Christianity. I am the most informative man you'll ever meet. I could tell you how everything went down. But I will live forever and a day, dear.
But there have been bad times too. I've died by hanging, beheading, poising, drowning, eaten alive, impaled with a tree, crushed by rocks, slit throat, electrocution, lethal injection, shock, stroke, cancer, heart attacks, turned inside out in a time machine, motorboat accidents, aeroplane accidents, car accidents, motorcycle accidents, bicycle accidents, choking, strangulation, suffocation, sawn in half, falling into a jet engine, stabbed, shot, bombed, blunt force trauma, brain parasites, eldritch abominations, Satan, Hera, Kali, that weirdo named Saiou, pencil through the eye, possessed, The Dying Man and I'm sure thousand other ways, I've lost count. I also can't remember what exactly I'm doing, who I am, what my motivations are, but hey, I'm immortal.