Disclaimer: This is a fanfiction based off the anime, which is based of the manga Inuyasha. Although this story is my own, the base for it belongs to Rumiko Takahashi.
A roll of thunder echoes in the distance, bringing forth another torrent of rain. No birds sing today despite the spring season and shadows take control of the world as the sun hides behind layers of grey clouds. The world seems devoid of life, reflecting the loss he feels.
Inuyasha sits in the cold hut, staring blankly at the wood panels of the walls. The cold doesn't bother him, the numbness he feels does. Nothing is the same while still being as it was. The mattress he sits on still lies unmade; the kettle near the fire still holds the remains of breakfast from hours ago while a pile of clothes still lie near the shelves, waiting for her to fold them. Those things remain untouched, even her smell still permeates the air, but her soul is gone.
The bundle in his arms shifts, shocking him back into the present.
In his arms, wrapped in a soft blanket she had knitted after months of practice, is their child. His body is wrapped tight, but he had somehow wriggled his arms free. His eyes are squeezed shut but he knows what lies behind them; chocolate brown eyes, her eyes. His black hair is finally dry and lies in a fuzzy mess around his face and ears, dog-ears that is. Each one seems too big for his body, almost falling over.
Despite the fact the small half-demon lying in his arms is his own son and hers, he can't help but glare at the baby.
"You did this." He growls.
The baby looks up at him, finally opening his eyes.
Inuyasha bares his teeth, feeling anger take over as he looks into her eyes. "She was healthy, she was happy, she could have lived if it weren't for you!"
The baby's eyes water. Despite not knowing what he's saying, the emotions rolling off his father frighten him.
Inuyasha doesn't care that his son is afraid of him. Because of him, he had lost her, the one girl who had ever truly loved him. She had accepted him, cared for him, and made him the happiest being alive when she agreed to become his mate. They had lived together for the past few years at the edge of the village where everything had began. He had built their home with his own hands, making it as close to her home in the other world as he could.
He wanted her to be happy and never regret choosing him.
The home was simple, holding only several rooms. The room he had put the most care into was their room, though. He built a platform for their bed, put in a window that faced the God Tree, put in shelves and a small indention where clothes sat, everything he could remember from her time. When he brought her to the home two years ago, he knew he had done well. Her smile was the most beautiful thing, softening his cold demeanor every time. She had touched everything, making sure it was all real. When she saw the bedroom though, he was instantly wrapped in her arms and held that way into the early morning hours.
They had been happy.
Sango and Miroku stayed near by despite the initial anxiety felt at rebuilding the slayers 'village. They had been wed in the short months following Naraku's demise. She had said goodbye to her brother Kohaku the day of his death, saddened that he couldn't be saved but happy his memories or her came back before closing his eyes for good. Soon after their wedding, Sango announced her pregnancy. No one was surprised then, but were when she gave birth to twin girls eight months later. Almost a year after the twins were born, she announced she was once again pregnant. Just a few short months ago she had given birth to the son Miroku had been praying for.
Kirara stayed with Sango of course. She had originally been bored with the lack of action and excitement. As soon as the twins were born though, she instantly took over as a babysitter and toy. She'd watch over them while they were napping so her master and husband could enjoy time together and play with the girls, allowing them to pull on her tails and tease them with games of peek-a-boo as Kagome called. Even when the twins began to sit up, crawl and walk, Kirara had been there as a goal to get to or bench to pull themselves up. The girls loved her, and as soon as her master gave birth to their son, she happily took care of him too.
Shippo had stayed close as well. He had taken up residence with Kaede, helping tend to her gardens and make deliveries. As the years went by her eye site had diminished and bones ached, making Shippo's assistance all that much welcome. His demon senses and strength were a bonus too. More then once he had sniffed out parasitic weeds as shoots, saving the sensitive herbs.
Inuyasha and Kagome were mated soon after their friends' wedding. They kept their partnership discrete, fearing the reaction of outsiders, but the villagers were well aware and very supporting. That was three years ago, and eight months ago, their secret was out in the open to anyone who looked at the pair.
Kagome had become pregnant with a half demon's baby.
Never before had he thought her more beautiful then when he saw her with his child. Her smile was always pure, her hands always resting on the slowly growing bulge and the glow she held seemed to be caught by everyone she touched. Every night he lay down with her, curled up against her back, arms around her stomach, holding both her and their child close.
He had been happy, genuinely happy for the first time.
Then, this morning, the moment came.
She had been eating her breakfast when she cried out in pain. Instantly he was at her side, concern taking over rational thought. Once the pain passed, she looked up at him with a smile and he knew it was time. Their child was coming into the world.
He took off instantly to get Kaede and their friends on the way, feeling as though he were in a dream.
He came back not ten minutes later with the old priestess, monk, slayer and two demons and in tow. He went to her side, nuzzling her cheek to comfort her and apologize for being away while she needed him.
The labor took most of the day. Kaede stayed close, preparing herbal treatments for pain every time the last one faded while keeping her comfortable. Sango took care of everyone, bringing water and food at meal times and keeping curious visitors at bay. Miroku left the hut not long after arriving, taking the demons with him to give the couple privacy and watch over his young ones. Near mid day the moment came. Her cries became more anguished much to his dismay, but he knew all would be better soon. They would be a happy family of three and that their son or daughter would be a true beauty.
An hour after hard labor, he finally heard it; the high-pitched cry of their child.
He couldn't see anything with his mate in his lap, but Kaede held him up after cleaning him. He had a son. Tightly bound in the blanket his mate had made was their son. Inuyasha reached out, taking the screaming baby from Kaede and cradling him in his arms so she could see as well. She smiled, slowly lifting her hand to caress his cheek.
Their son then stopped crying and looked at his mother. Her smile intensified when she saw that he has her eyes. Her hand then touched the base of his over sized dog-ear.
"Half-demon." She murmured weakly.
His senses perked in a second. He damned himself for being so wrapped up in the child for not looking out towards his mate. She was bleeding heavily, her heartbeat was slowing, and her breathing was becoming shallow. Kaede reeked of panic.
He looked at his mate; she was pale, but still smiling at their baby.
"Kuro." She whispered, running a finger over a fuzzy black ear. Her eyes then began to close and it happened.
Her heart stopped.
Inuyasha had sat stunned. In his arms he still held their beautiful baby boy, but in his lap laid the soulless body of his mate. Kaede sensed that it was too late and sat back. She seemed stunned at what had just happened. Inuyasha looked up at her face. She seemed to have aged another 10 years in the past few seconds. Her searched her expression, his eyes asking the one question she knew she couldn't answer.
The old woman shook her head. Standing slowly, she then walked over to him, picked up their son and walked over to the stunned demon slayer standing in the doorway.
He couldn't believe it…Seconds ago everything had been perfect, now everything lay in ruins.
That had been hours ago, and still he hadn't moved from their bed. Kaede had returned not long after leaving, picking up the bloody linens and taking away her supplies. A moment later a few men showed up to take her away. He gave her one last caress on the cheek before they took her. Sango came back not too long after the men left and to bring him the baby. He was screaming in the demon slayer's arms, but Inuyasha made no move towards the child. Sango's eyes were blood-shot and tears still streamed down her cheeks. She finally shoved the baby into his arms after a few seconds of waiting before racing off into the arms of Miroku, wanting someone to comfort her.
Now he sat, anger finally pouring through him. Someone had to be blamed, some had to be at fault for what had happened. His eyes never left his son's face. He was to blame; he had done something to make this happen. A growl begins to reverberate in his chest.
His son grabs hold of the two locks of hair near his bangs and pulls, bringing his father's face to his. Instantly, Inuyasha's anger dies. The gesture is the same she had used when he wouldn't listen to her to get his attention. Inuyasha looks at his son's face again, seeing so much of her in him. The color of his hair and eyes, the stubborn look, he even has his lower lip poked out, just like she use to do when she was pouting.
His eyes begin to water. No, his son wasn't to blame. No one was to blame. Curling up, his son cradled near his stomach, Inuyasha lays down and let's the unshed tears fall for his loss.
His mate, his best friend, his guardian angel, the one person who truly understood him, was gone.
His Kagome was gone.
(3 years later)
Kuro covers his mouth to hold back a giggle. His hiding spot is perfect. Down wind, behind thick foliage and covered in mud, he knows he wont be found. Granted the degree is extreme when hiding from a human.
"Kuro! Kuro this isn't funny, your daddy will be very mad!"
Kuro doesn't even flick an ear at the yell. He hadn't done anything wrong, he'd simply wanted to play a game of hide and seek…without his babysitter knowing it.
"Kuro!" The voice is further away now. The toddler giggles audibly this time, reveling in his victory at out smarting a human. Perhaps outsmarting isn't right, more like out sensing, but a win is a win to the young half demon.
"Keep doing this and you'll be kept inside all day." Kuro yelps and falls forward at the unexpected voice. He rolls over and looks sheepishly up at his father. Inuyasha isn't amused. His arms are crossed with both eyebrows pushed into a glare. One sniff from Kuro tells him his father is only annoyed, not angry with him.
"I'm serious Kuro, Miroku has three kids of his own and he doesn't need to stress about another."
Kuro frowns at that.
Sighing, Inuyasha squats down to look at his son. "We're a pack, we take care of each other, remember?"
Kuro just looks away. "But Aunt Sango and Uncle Miroku have a family together."
Inuyasha falls back. He hadn't seen that coming.
Kuro looks back at his dad with his wide brown eyes. Every time he looks at him like that, Inuyasha can't help but remember her. His long black hair, chocolate brown eyes, thin frame, he looks just like her. He sits cross-legged and holds his arms out. Kuro scrambles up and into his father's lap. He plops down with his knees up and back against his father's chest. Inuyasha smiles, remembering how Kagome use to sit with him in the same position…back when she was still alive that is.
"Why don't I have a mommy?"
Inuyasha stops breathing. Crap…he had thought about this moment many times, but now that it actually is happening, he can't remember what he had planned on saying.
"Uh…" Inuyasha watches as Kuro turns in his lap. Mud is caked over the left side of his face, leaving only his eye and part of his cheek visible. The pleading is obvious though.
Letting out the breath he had been holding, Inuyasha reaches into his fire rat robe, pulling out the gold locket hidden inside. He pulls it off, and holds it in front of his son. Kuro looks at the shiny gold before placing a small, clawed finger on it. He traces the outside of the heart before his father pops it open with a quick flick of one of his claws. Kuro gasps at what's inside. He instantly notices his father's face in one half, but it's the face on the other side of the heart. He hold up both his hands and holds it while his father cradles his hands and the locket.
The other face is that of a woman, a pretty woman too. Even though she looks like she's yelling, her face looks warm. Brown eyes, long black hair…wait a second. Kuro looks between his dad and the pretty woman.
"Mommy?" Kuro looks back at his father with an excited look.
"Yeah, that's your mom kid." Inuyasha gives a small half smile before letting it drop.
"…Why isn't she here?"
"She'd be here if she could."
"She died didn't she? Like Grandma Kaede."
"Yeah."
Kuro looks at the picture of his mother. "How?" It's almost a whisper; the tone alone radiates his son's disappointment.
"She died giving me you." Inuyasha looks up at the sky, watching a flock of birds before continuing. "The day you were born, something went wrong and she passed away. She got to hold you and name you though. She really did love you Kuro, don't doubt that." He looks back at his son's muddy face. A stray tear is snaking its way through the muck. Inuyasha uses the pad of his thumb to wipe it away.
"I killed her?"
Inuyasha's eyes widen, fearing that his son remembers the hours after he was born and the hatred he once had for him.
"No Kuro, you didn't. No one killed your mother, it was an accident."
Kuro closes the locket with a click. "I wish she was still alive…"
"Me too kid." Inuyasha pulls his son close. "But I think she's still here in some ways, watching over us."
A breeze brushes by, pulling gently at their hair but the sensation is localized at their ears, caressing them softly. Inuyasha smiles at the sensation. "I love you too Kagome."
A/N: Done, hope you guys liked it! I know it's an angst fic, but I'd been chewing on this one for a LONG time. Thanks for reading, please review!
Love, MiLou