Time Left: thirty-two seconds

By the way, this fic doesn't follow the timeline in the twilight series. It was also made before I read Breaking Dawn.

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EDWARD…

The skies above us were full of kaleidoscopic colored clouds, painted by the lofty orange glowing sphere slowly rising from the trees' shadows. It was a marvel, a work of art, a miracle of whom they call god.

Watching sunrise for the forty-third thousandth of my life wasn't my ideal thing to when Bella told me that she wanted to talk and spend some time with me. I didn't want to agree because it was a silly idea but she pushed me in to it. And I, who was the vampire, therefore should be stronger, had given in to a silly human's wants—and I thought I was strong.

It was, after all, an unhealthy thing to do. If Charlie, her father, would notice her absence in the house from 5AM until whenever I get her home, she'd get into a big scenario of trouble. But she insisted and said that her father won't wake up until seven and her persistence and countless pleadings made me agree. It was hard not to.

Bella and I have talked about this day three days ago and the plan was that we were the only ones who were going to watch the crack of dawn in our "meadow"; until Alice saw the whole thing coming and asked if she and Jasper could come too. Emmett heard our conversation and he wanted to take Rosalie too. I didn't want them to come along but Bella only said,

"They promised not to disturb us" and she gave me a look that said, 'shut up and let Alice have her fun' or so I thought.

It was somewhat bizarre to watch sunrise instead of dusk since we all loved the twilight. But it was the first morning of summer and Bella wanted to spend that first summer day with me.

Just the two of us. Until of course, Alice ruined everything; just as she ruined most likely everything for me. It was strange how a girl like her so small could irritate me a hundred times her size.

We parted ways when we reached the field; each of us finding our own spot as we scattered in the meadow. Bella and I sat in the middle. So here we are, watching the dull colored clouds morph from dark blue to lilac, then to sky blue.

The human gasped when the early bright lights stroked my face because I glistened like a prism, creating small rainbows everywhere. I wonder why that still surprised her—but those small gasps of awe that she made never failed to make me smile inside.

Her gasp got even wider when the sun's golden rays touched Emmett, Jasper, Rosalie and Alice; and we all looked like big treasure piles of gleaming gold—except for Bella, of course. She blushed as she watched me with awe and curiosity when I lifted my hand to fix my ruffled my hair. I didn't know what to do every time she blushed.

I would get quite curious and I would ask my self, why was she blushing? Was she shy? Embarrassed? Or was it just because of me?

She drives me crazy in every move she does…I love her too much. She's just human. She's supposed to be my food… I barely even know her and I was willing to lose everything even my life and my soul if I ever have one just for her.

When the sun's show ended, I stood up and reached for her hand which she took and I helped her up.

"Ok, sunrise is over. We better get you some breakfast. Come on, we're going home" I said.

"But why? I'm not yet hungry" She reasoned.

"Charlie will be worried when he knocks at your locked door and there won't be anyone to answer. Remember, we just escaped. You didn't really ask for his permission. Just be thankful that he's a bit dizzy after that cocktail party he went to last night." Then I turned to Alice and rolled my eyes and fortunately, she saw it so she stuck her tongue out "and besides," I added, "We didn't come here for a family reunion"

"Ok, I get your point but let me say goodbye first" she said as she turned to Alice and Jasper's direction then to Rosalie and Emmett's.

After that, she went back to me and held by hand, pulling me with her to the green shady meadow's boundary. We walked out of the clearing, still holding hands with her leading the way. When we were hidden behind the lush vegetation and the tall gigantic trees, I held her hand tightly; but not too tight for she was fragile. We took a few more steps until she stopped so I stopped too.

"Is there something wrong?" I asked as I wrapped her warm body in my cold arms, her back facing my front.

"Well, the reason why I wanted you to spend the first day of summer with me is because I…I…we have to talk." She looked serious now.

"What do you want to talk about?" I asked as I uncoiled my arms around her and placed it on her shoulders to show her that I was going to listen to her.
What could she want to talk about? Our marriage? My proposal? Was she going to back out? I know she would not dare to set our deal off but I was prying to know. However, I just listened.

"I think it's about time that we…talk about…" she trailed off as she blushed, her face, crimson red. She restrained herself from smiling but I decided to wait for her to continue her statement rather than interrupting her before I discourage her to continue. "I was thinking that we talk about…" she trailed off again. I was getting a little more anxious and at the same time suspicious. "About 'US'" she continued, giving her last word with emphasis.

"What about us?" I asked suddenly more confused but still curious

"When will we do it?"

"Do what?" I asked obliviously.

She sighed for she knew that I was clueless. But I really was.

Slowly, she detached my hands that rested on her shoulder and placed them on her hips as she crushed herself at my body. I answered her by returning an affectionate hug. Her sweet smelling hair met my lips and I inhaled every bit of her.

But Bella was always unsuspected, and I suddenly felt as if I would fall down when I felt her lips on my collar bone, going up to my neck and after some time, she went up to my cheek but tracing my jaw line with her lips first.

She wobbled a little so I stiffened my clutch on her hips so that we wouldn't fall down. Finally, she reached my lips and when she kissed me, I kissed her back—with caution, of course. Just like before, she would force my mouth open but I would pull away. But not today, no; because when she kissed me, her hands were playing with the buttons on my shirt but she didn't have the urge to open it yet.

Her soft brown eyes had that extreme longing when she looked at me. She was proposing sex to me—again. And of course, I knew I had to restrict once more. My swift hands grabbed hers as I stepped backwards away from her. She instantly groaned in frustration but I only smiled and said,

"Bella, love. We had this talk before, we're not going to do this unless you become more…durable" She frowned. "It's too risky, Bella. I don't want to lose you like this. I'm scared that I might hurt you but don't worry I'll stick to our deal…after marriage. I'm sorry" I added.

She groaned again. She was frustrated…and I'm sure that she's mad.

But no, I didn't want her to pout during the whole trip just because of me. So what I did was that I took a swift step towards her again and quickly held her face at vampire speed. So fast that she didn't even know that I didn't touch her until I kissed her warm lips; when her human mind realized that I was kissing her, she instantly moved her lips gently with mine. I didn't need to breathe after the kiss but she did so I pulled away.

"Let's go. I'll carry you" I mumbled. Then I bent down to grab her by her knees and then a hand at her back for support while her arms curled around my neck; and I ran as fast as I could back to my car so that we would get on time at Bella's before Charlie wakes up at seven (Alice confirmed that he'd wake up at seven).

When we got back to my car, Bella didn't even utter a sound. Although I knew that she wasn't mad at me anymore, it disturbed me a lot when she was still pouting. I tried to ignore her but she still kept the intolerable frown even until when I opened the car's door for her. I sighed and told her,

"Bella, I hope you understand why we can't do it"

"Yes, I know it's for my safety…but it's just unfair." She replied as I tucked her in and fixed her seatbelt then I went to the driver's seat.

"Bella, love, don't be like that" I mumbled as I started the engine of my Volvo.

I drove while she looked outside the window, still silent. I'm already used to her fretting but this time, it was different. She never sulked this long before…ok, now she was just being bratty but I couldn't stay mad at her for less than five minutes. True, I was dismayed that she still wanted the forbidden action of our love at this time but I knew that I couldn't stop her for in fact; she was already stronger than me.

Again, I began to feel uncomfortable because she was upset because of me and I hated it. I was about to say sorry when the front of the car started emitting smoke or rather, steam. I stopped the car and we both got out. I saw the worry in her eyes as we went in front of the car.

First, we let the steam disappear then we went forward. The car's radiator looked bad but it wasn't something I couldn't handle. Now if I only had water to cool the cap…but we needed Rosalie because there was something more about the car's overheating. I think there was something in the engine that I didn't understand and didn't want to touch so I called her while Bella looked at the engine. After I told Rosalie what happened, she agreed to meet us with Emmett to fix the car while Bella and I would borrow Emmett's jeep to go back to Forks.

"Edward, do you really think that we'll make it back in time?" Bella asked me.

"Of course I do. We just have to wait a little bit."

"Alright, but what will we do now?"

"We'll figure something out." I said as I wrapped my arms on her waist. I knew that the weather was humid but she liked it when I did that because I was cold.

She faced me and led out a strange tantalizing emotion that was new. I've never seen her act like that before. Her emotion was priceless and the more I looked at her, the more I was tempted to touch her. She was flirting with me again and this time, I got distracted, I fell for her with her new 'emotion'. She looked so cute at that time that I didn't realize that I pinned her to the car, kissing her neck with my cold marble lips.

There were thoughts in my head, both good and bad when I kissed her. First, I felt lucky. Lucky to have Bella in love with me like this. Even up to now, I couldn't believe that I actually controlled my vampire instincts—I didn't kill her. At first, I thought that I did that for Carlisle but then I realized that it wasn't just for my foster father but for Bella and me.

That was the good thought but there was still the bad one which was still about us. This all started with lust and definitely not love and it's such a shame that I fell in love with a human being. And this was when I thought about enjoying the buffet and having little of the wine. I knew that I needed her for my own selfish needs—I knew I needed her, I wanted her.

I didn't know what to do; my self control was helping to prevent me from hurting Bella but my second thought, my persuading thought, wanted me to suck Bella dry. I wanted her too, it wasn't just her. I wanted to taste her blood again, I wanted to taste her and I wanted to be in her. I kept on kissing her neck as I inhaled her sweet smelling hair. Who will I listen to; my good thought or my bad thought? I wanted her so bad at that time but I couldn't tell her that.

I wanted her so bad but I would stop and control my actions but now…I could have her… this was a deserted place anyway, I could make love with her, drink her blood, and then kill her. I could easily get rid of her corpse—

What monster am I? I'm not good enough for her. Maybe it was better for her if I hadn't shown up.

Those were my exact thoughts every time she would seduce me. It was really hard to maintain my self control especially when I'm around her; even more when she's like this. I didn't mean to think about killing her and I guess I just got carried away. That wasn't a good sign, being carried away, I mean.

I stopped kissing her and sat on my trunk.

She sat beside me and asked,

"Was it my expression?"

"Huh?"

"Why did you kiss me?"

"What do you mean? I always kiss you…we always kiss." I mumbled.

"Yeah but every time things like this happen, you'd only nuzzle me but this time, you kissed me and it was like" She looked into my eyes "Kind of…kissing someone with… enthusiasm" she smiled. "Is there a chance for me after all; Have you changed your mind? You wouldn't hurt me…"

"No" I lied; she grimaced. There she goes again, thinking that I wouldn't hurt her because I love her but I just thought of killing her awhile ago.

Yes, I wouldn't hurt her but what would she do if I slip—and if I slip, I wouldn't be able to forgive myself and I'll probably end up committing suicide.

And where will my soul go, if I ever have one? Of course I'll go to hell, there's no way we'd die together in a happy way. She never did something that'll make her go to hell but I always did.

I coveted her and besides that, I've killed people. Lots and lots of innocent people.

"Please, Edward" She pleaded.

"No Bella, for the last time, it's too dangerous" I reasoned.

"Maybe if I heat things up a little" she said as her fingers traveled to my chest. I let her do that. Actually, I didn't want her to stop it. She seemed pleased that I wasn't backing off or doing anything to stop her so she took the opportunity of that moment and quickly slid her hand under my shirt.

I froze

I liked what she was doing, I didn't want her to stop but she really had to or she'll get hurt. I attempted to stop her by clinching her waist to draw her away. Apparently, she misunderstood my clasp on her waist and took it as my consent to let her prolong what she was doing.

I was about to say, 'stop' when her fingers found my left nipple. I gasped as she smiled; I tried to protest but I couldn't move because she caressed the skin around my nipple so gently and so arousing that I couldn't move a muscle. Then she deliberately lifted half of my shirt up but I suddenly heard Emmett's thoughts.

"Stop, Bella! Emmett and Rosalie are near" I warned

"How much time do we have?"

"One minute wait, no, no…fifty-two seconds. Emmett will drive faster when he reaches the second curve" I blurted

"Whatever. There's still time" then she quickly refrained on lifting my shirt up, exposing my well built chest.

"Bella…" I warned with my alarming tone

"Let me do this Edward." She said but I pulled away and fixed my shirt

"I know that you're an incredible sex goddess and I want you now; I really do. You don't have any idea what the hell I was thinking awhile ago so don't do this or we'll end up doing something stupid like doing the horizontal mumbo at the middle of the road in the next thirty seconds. You're tempting me again but please do keep in mind that I won't make love with you unless you become a vampire. If you continue on seducing me like this you sexy mischievous seductress, I might slip Bella, do you realize that?" wow, it took me fifteen seconds to say all of that calmly but sadly, she took it the wrong way.

"What is it with you? I didn't literally say that we'll have sex right away what I said is that, we'll try---"

Her words were cut off by my lips crashing against hers. She was frantic, disappointed moreover; she was mad at me. I tried to give her a small portion of what she wanted though it was risky. I kind of nibbled her lower lip, sucking it indolently, pleading for her lips to pry open and surprisingly, she opened. She didn't kiss me back; no, not yet. She tried to open my mouth but mine remained closed. I just got her tongue and played it with my lips. I was tempted to enter her mouth and hers into mine letting her experience something entirely new but of course, there were still restrictions. Finally, after a few seconds; I pulled away from her. Emmett and Rosalie were there. We could already see them as a tiny dot from afar slowly approaching us. We could already see them going swiftly towards us from the long road and then accelerating forward. They were on time…fifty-two seconds…

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This is my first fanfic and maybe my last in the twilight category. You don't have to tell me how much you think this sucks because it was just a product of boredom and fandomness. Just make a review before you leave and it'll be really appreciated…as long as it's not one of those stupid FLAMES that don't even tell you what's wrong with the fic. But anyway, enjoy reading this piece of crap. Thank you very much.

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