When Hell Freezes Over – A Torchwood Fanfiction
Rating: T for mentions of mature situations...if you squint.
Disclaimer: I do not own Torchwood, or any of the characters/creatures mentioned herein.
Un-Betaed, so any mistakes are mine and mine alone.
Summary: Ianto thinks about him and Jack.
Jack has died again. Nothing spectacular, just a couple of rogue weevils. It happens everyday. He dies everyday. I die everyday.
Because how can you watch the one you love die over and over again, never knowing if this might be the time, without dying with them? He always comes back, good as new, his trademark grin firmly in place as soon as he's taken that first ragged, painful breath. He always comes back to me, for me. And what do I do in return? I make sure I'm there to soothe him, to comfort him, to give him a reason to breathe again.
We go back to the hub and I put some coffee on. My magic cure all. It's not just a drink to me, it's my way of saying "I love you" to everyone who drinks my beloved elixir. Jack knows this. Jack hates this. He tells me not to love him. That all it will do is hurt me.
But these brief moments in time for him, are worth more than the life of every human being on this planet to me. To know that he breathes each new breath, each new breath that catapults him back in to life, to know that I can be there for him to cling to, well that is worth every day of dying inside.
I pour out his coffee, strong enough to strip paint, into his favourite bucket-like mug. The handle is hot enough to scorch my hand as I head up to his office. I knock and wait for him to call out a muffled "Enter!" before going in and placing the boiling mug on his desk. His bare torso appears at the hatch to his bunker and he beckons me down.
I follow him and the usual 'dabbling' occurs. Is it still dabbling when you're in love with your partner? When you start replacing innovative and avant garde with loving and tender?
As sleep begins to capture us in its thrall, I lean close to his ear and whisper how much I love him, how I'll never leave, how I'll always be there to wake up to. And when he starts to cry, I hold him to my chest and tell him those things again and again, hoping against hope that they'll somehow be promises I can keep.
He eventually stills, the tears drying up as he tells me yet again not to love him, that I'll only get hurt, that he's not worth it. He quietly slips into a deep sleep and I make one final promise; one I know I'll be able to keep. And that is that I'll love him 'til the day hell freezes over and the Devil and all his demons swarm the earth. I join Jack in peaceful slumber, knowing that in spite of everything he says, because of everything that he says, that he wants me to love him, and that he loves me too.
A.N. I would like to mention that I only started watching TW about 6 weeks ago. I loved series 1 & 2...right up until Exit Wounds...why did they have to die?Yeah, so, raced through them, then E.W. threw me a bit, and I knew from my exploration of this archive that Ianto dies in CofE. So I chickened out and didn't watch it...until last night. I did not take day four well. In actual fact I sobbed for around about 2 hours, whilst listening to R.E.M.'s Everybody Hurts (Don't own that either) on repeat. That was stage one of my grieving process. This little ficlet is stage two. I wrote it when I was still in stage one, hence it being on the darker side of things. Hope you liked it. Please read and review.