A/N: My first foray into the Dragon age fandom, X_X Hope I've done this ok, constructive criticism welcome. Just a little silliness to relieve the dark ending of DA2. Fenris/F!Hawke (love that Lyrium covered elf. X3) Thanks to my lovely beta:- Murlyndsgirl, check out her work!
Exhaustion, that was the problem plain and simple.
Hawke stopped the procession once more to lean on a dying tree; on the surface of it, to scan the horizon for any bandits foolish enough to be blocking the road before her and her companions...
The ulterior motive, of course, was just to rest, to lean on something other than her rapidly-dwindling strength for just a few seconds.
It had been a month. A month of running, eating what could be stolen and sleeping in damp caves or worse, and it was grating on all of their nerves. Isabela and Avaline were bitching at one another night and day, the formally affectionate pet names of 'Prude' and 'Whore' slowly becoming genuine insults. Hawke and Donnic were spending all their time pulling the two apart. Sweet, perky little Merrill seemed to be losing her sparkle, walking around with her head turned down and unable to raise a smile even when they came across patches of flowers or nests of bluebirds.
Worse still, Fenris and Anders…
Hawke winced even at the thought. Those two really would be the death of her, and the others if they weren't allowed to relieve the tension of their conflicting personalities soon. Fenris was glaring at the mage night and day, waiting, it seemed, for the mage to attack them and to give him the excuse the elf so badly wanted to chop the man in half in one sweep of his sword.
Of course she herself hadn't quite forgiven Anders for what he'd done either, but even so the choices had been made. Hawke had fought for the mages, not for Anders and his insane plan, not for the years of hatred, but because of blood loyalty to the last remaining family member she had.
Hawke turned her head slightly and managed to find a brief smile, for there, in the caravan of miserable mages, warriors and rogues, was her little sister, alive and as well as could be expected, limping slightly on aching feet, one of dear, sweet Merrill's arms around her to keep her upright. Varric and Isabela, chatting happily between themselves despite their obvious discomfort and dishevelment from not having a real rest for weeks, followed behind the first two mages. Anders and Donnic brought up the rear, staff and sword drawn in case of attacks. Walking closely behind her as she took the lead, Fenris and Avaline; eyes that were naturally built for hunting helping her to scan the horizon for dangers.
Maker, how she loved them all.
This was her family now, she realised with a sudden clarity. Here were her brothers and sisters in arms, here were the people whom she would die to protect, and maker damn the mages and the Templars, she wasn't going to join anyone's war, she just wanted…
She wanted…
She wanted to make them all safe. She wanted to find somewhere they could all be free from the blight and the war and just live as they ought to. A mad ambition, she knew, because maker knew that Isabela wouldn't be happy in a gilded cage, Avaline hated anything akin to charity towards herself and Fenris…
He looked away from his apparently intense talk with Avaline and caught Hawke's eyes. She felt her skin flush red and turned quickly away.
Like the wolf for which he was named, Fenris needed his own space, try to cage him and he'd fight tooth and nail to be free, give him some space and he'd come back to his den every time.
Hawke let out a low, tired sigh.
A hand landed on her shoulder, she didn't have to look to see whose it was, she felt the familiar claws of his gauntlets pricking her even through her armour.
"Are you all right?"
She almost laughed. Of course not was what she wanted to say, they'd been driven from their homes, their lives uprooted and destroyed, but she held it back. They needed their leader, after all, no matter how uneasy her head became, she had to wear the crown for them.
"Just tired, Fenris," she muttered softly, her head drooping a little, "Very tired."
She heard the uneasiness in his stance at this, felt the tension in the hand that rested on her shoulder, he was still learning, after all, how to be a lover to her. She knew how hard he found it to show his affection for her publicly, knew that even in this moment he probably wanted nothing more than to hug her tightly and whisper something sweet to her, but at the same time he didn't really know how to begin, or what to say.
He muttered, "Should we make camp for the night?"
Her head shook, "Keep moving, no cover here. Let's make for that copse." She pointed ahead of them, to a smallish grouping of trees, half a mile away at most. It would provide shelter for the night, with any luck. And perhaps there would be… berries, or fruit trees, gingerbread houses maybe, whatever traditionally grew in little woodlands to sustain weary travellers.
There weren't any berry bushes, or fruit trees, any obliging witches who may have built houses out of confectionary had obviously passed this place over without a second look.
But there was, Andraste bless it, a lake, hidden amidst trees. Hawke had almost wept at the sight of it. She delighted in the moment when she saw how her people reacted. Merrill and Isabela were already busily making fishing rods out of whatever they could find, nimble fingers and good instincts soon netted them enough fish for a better meal than they'd seen in weeks. Even Fenris, with his dislike of the things, had brightened at the idea of a hot meal that night.
And now the camp was set up, their makeshift tents erected, a fire burning merrily in their midst, stomachs all full with fresh fish and all of them sitting around just enjoying the chance to rest for a while. Hawke had consented to Bethany and Anders putting up enchanted wards of protection around the area, ignoring the danger of drawing magical attention in favour of the far more pressing need of her companions to just snatch a few hours of relaxation
Their campsite was oddly silent, Hawke realized. For some this might have been worrying, but for her it just meant that none of the old arguments were flaring up. She allowed a smile to play her lips and pondered how best to to nudge them from merely content' into 'happy'.
An idea came to her in a mad rush and that was just how she responded to it. She stood up suddenly, unbuckling her armour as she moved, and called out, "Last one in the lake is paying for drinks when we find a bar!"
Then she was running, dashing for the water and shedding her armour as she went. She dove into the cold, clear liquid in her smalls, not giving a damn about modesty or anything else, just to enjoy for a few moments, that was the key.
She heard splashes behind her and turned, as she suspected, Merrill had been second to her feet, followed closely by Isabela. The former because of course, splashing in natural water was a kind of frolicking, and the latter because she needed very little excuse to strip off. Merrill let out a loud squeal at how cold it was that sent a ripple of laughter through Hawke and Isabela.
Bethany was next, never eager to be left out by big sister, and of course seeing the appeal of a group of wet girls in their smalls, Varric rose to his feet and laid down Bianca with reverence before charging in after the ladies.
Donnic and Avaline followed close behind, Donnic laughing and pulling his blushing bride along behind him as she fought between propriety and her own desire to give in to happiness, just a little. They entered the water half-wrestling, with splashes and laughter.
That left… oh dear.
Hawke bit her lip as she watched Anders and Fenris eye one another across the fire. Suddenly the competitive part of this little game seemed far too serious, she ought to get out of the water now and try to abate the fight that was doubtless about to erupt-
Anders tossed his head in a challenging gesture, and started running. Fenris was mere inches behind him, gauntlets and chest plate dropping with satisfying metallic clangs even as Anders' jacket was thrown off and shirt was yanked over his head. In the water, the others began to call out encouragement for the two, Varric personally adding that he'd be buying a bottle of the finest Orlesian brandy on the loser's tab. Fenris tugged his tunic over his head, resulting in a low wolf-whistle from Isabela that was followed by another as Anders dropped his trousers.
For a moment or two it was neck-and-neck, Fenris fighting with the buckles on his belt while Anders wrestled his boots off, and then the silver-haired elf clearly decided he would take wet clothes over losing to Anders and dove in, leggings and all, leaving Anders to stumble in behind, tripping over his own foot and landing face-first in the water.
Both men surfaced at the same time, spluttering water and coughing at their sudden entrance, shoving sodden hair from their eyes.
Anders huffed, "…I suppose I can't offer some other service instead of paying for drinks?"
The suggestions came quick and fast, Anders should have expected it, really;
"Oh! You can do all the cooking!" Merrill piped eagerly.
"Sing us a merry song with a jig, blondie!"
"Hold your head underwater until the bubbles stop?" Fenris growled, though it at least sounded like he was joking.
Isabela's eyes lit up with lust, "Ohh, why don't you just service all of us, lightning boy?"
Hawke couldn't help it, she began to laugh, it was loud and long and maybe a little hysterical after all the time they'd spent being miserable, but it was a blessed release and she couldn't make herself stop until her stomach ached and she had to cease her giggles or cease breathing.
As she righted herself, rubbing her happy tears away from her eyes and examining the group for reactions. Most of them had been laughing too, she recalled the sound like music.
She cleared her vision a little more and saw the reason why they'd stopped, Fenris was standing mere inches in front of her, arms folded, hair dripping, and making his most intimidating face.
Maker help her, why did that make her knees tremble? Oh, right, because Fenris was undeniably beautiful, even in a full formed rage. It wasn't helping the situation that his skin was exposed, so much more than he would ever usually allow, even if he had kept his trousers on, the lyrium tattoo vines that wove across his torso were a simply beautiful sight, accentuating muscles that had Hawke trembling with desire as well as some slight fear.
She swallowed hard, hoping he hadn't taken her laughter the wrong way, he was so easily offended sometimes, and with their nerves all being on knife-edge over the last few days she could see how the woman who claimed to love him nearly having a fit from laughing at him could have-
The corner of his mouth quirked up, just slightly, she had just a second to wonder what he was smirking at before his hand moved like lightning and swept what felt like a small wave of the slightly cold water over her. She let out a shriek that was more surprise than anything and then she was shoving him, aware that really, she had very little chance of knocking him off-balance, but smiling when she felt him obligingly fall back in the water, letting out one of his low, beautiful and rare laughs.
After that it all became a bit of a haze of joy for Hawke, a huge splash-fight erupted between her, Fenris, Anders, Bethany, Isabela and Merrill; Varric and the two former gaurds seemed content to watch this madness at a distance, with Varric claiming that short legs meant paddling was about the best they'd get out of him.
At one point in the midst of all this Hawke paused a moment to take a breath and felt a brush of a hand on the back of her breast-bindings, making her twist sharply in the water and seek out the culprit, only to see Fenris floating behind her looking vaguely confused.
"Fenris!" she hissed, cheeks burning, "Not here!"
He cocked his head to one side, "What? Not here what?" he questioned, only serving to confuse the Champion more, at least until Isabela surfaced with a gasp for air and a wide grin.
"Bela I will have your head!" Hawke shrieked giving chase to the Rivani, not that she had a hope of catching up, Isabela was a magnificent swimmer.
The pirate merely laughed lustily and called out, "Damn, I'll have to work at getting Fen's trousers off instead then!"
"Not while I have my strength you won't." Fenris muttered behind Hawke, before he dove beneath the lapping waters to hide away from the Pirate's advances.
All too soon the sun began to set and the waters grew too cold even for the hardier members of their group. It was a sodden but happy gang who crouched around the campfire that evening though, listening as they hadn't for weeks to one of Varric's tales of their own exploits, laughing at his exaggerations and exchanging knowing looks at the outright lies.
Hawke allowed herself a look around at them, her people, her family, taking in the sight of them so peaceful and happy and locking it away in her mind for the harder times. Avaline and Donnic, settled close to one another, hands grasped in the only public display of their affection they felt comfortable to make. Isabela with either arm slung loosely around Merrill and Anders, fingering their feathery shoulders and apparently muttering comments to make the two mages blush and laugh at the same time. Varric, sitting in the firelight and waving his hands emphatically at the exciting moments in the story. Dear, sweet Bethany sitting as close as she could to the dwarf with her knees pulled to her chest, eyes bright and fascinated to hear of all her sister had done when she was taken away.
And… and where was Fenris? Hawke wondered with sudden fright, terrified that while they'd been allowing themselves a night of rest, someone had broken in and taken him, an associate of Danarius perhaps? Come to exact a terrible revenge, or worse, just to steal away her beautiful elf and turn him back to the cowed slave he was before-
Strong arms curled around her from behind and Hawke found herself being gently but firmly pulled against a warm chest, seating her between thighs taut with muscle. She blinked in surprise at this sudden and unprecedented act; Fenris simply didn't hold her in public. It wasn't something which bothered her particularly, not when he would make up for it when they were alone. Yet, just in this moment, it felt like the most wonderful thing in the world for her lover to be holding her to his chest among their friends.
His head dropped forwards a little to rest on her shoulder and she felt him breathe in briefly, he always said he loved the smell of her hair, though Maker knew she hadn't washed it properly in what felt like weeks. He sighed gently through his nose and tilted his head slightly, Hawke blushed when she felt his lips chastely brush her cheek. Andraste's arse, she hoped this new, affectionate Fenris was here to stay.
She allowed her fingers to trace the lyrium vines on his forearms and hands, admiring the slight twitches in his muscles. His lips formed a slight smile against her cheek and she felt his deliciously deep voice whisper gently, "Te amo, pulchra."
Varric paused in his epic tale at that moment, apparently the first to spot what was occurring between their fearless leader and their resident broody elf. He let out a low laugh, "Broody, I'm going to have to re-name you Smiley soon if you're not careful."
Hawke tensed, waiting for Fenris to pull away, to huff in his embarrassed way and probably retreat to the tents for the night rather than face the smirks of their companions.
Fenris lifted his eyes and fixed Varric with a steady glare before grumbling, "Shut up, dwarf."
Hawke thought she might just burst from happiness when he then simply dropped his head back onto her shoulder and clutched her a little more tightly to his body. She felt the tension there and knew how hard he was fighting his urge to simply hide away as she had suspected he would. Maker's breath, what had she done to deserve someone who tried so hard for her?
"Ahh, I think they're sweet." Merrill cooed, pausing to observe the pair before adding in her usual curious, not connected to anything way, "You know, wolves mate for life."
Varric smirked from his place near the fire, "Wish I could." He quipped, bringing laughter to all but Merrill's faces.
The Dalish blinked, bewildered, at the circle and turned to Isabela, "Did I miss a dirty joke again?"
"I'll explain it later Kitten." Isabela replied with a wink. "What've wolves and their… habits got to do with anything anyway?"
"I believe she was referring to my name." Fenris rumbled from his position behind Hawke, "Fenris means wolf."
Isabela blinked, then smirked, "Oh, didn't know that. Damn, Hawke, he just got about fifty times more… interesting. Still not willing to share?" she winked one dusky eye. Hawke felt Fenris tense behind her, out of embarrassment or maybe anger that the pirate would make such a suggestion.
He needn't have worried, Hawke merely smiled wryly back to the pirate and snuggled closer to her elfin lover with a coo of, "Never."
Isabela pouted at this, but persisted with one last half-serious offer, "What if I got you drunk?"
Hawke didn't even look up from where she was nuzzling her head under Fenris' chin, "There's not enough alcohol in the world to make me let you touch my man."
"Ahhh, sister, you'll kill us with sweetness before much longer!" Bethany called across the flames.
"Sweetness is overrated, lets see some skin!" Isabela added, apparently deciding that if she really wasn't going to talk her way into their tent she may as well enjoy some teasing. "Come on lovebirds, give us a show the Blooming Rose would be proud of!"
Hawke rolled her eyes, meaning to fire a quip back, but stopped when she saw the faint blue glow appearing on the arms still curled protectively around her waist, heard the low growl in his throat.
Varric rescued the night with great skill, quickly and calmly he called out, "Ok, Broody's lit up, let's get back to the story before the fuse goes off!"
Remarkably, the teasing did stop, all eyes going back to Varric and his tale. Well, all but the eyes of Fenris and Hawke, of course, wrapped up in one another and feeling content for the first time in weeks.
The night wore on, one by one they went to their tents, Varric volunteering to take first watch 'to work on his stories in peace', Merrill, it seemed, had nodded off under the moonlight and Anders gallantly volunteered to see her safely to her bedroll, lifting the tiny elfin mage easily and carrying her towards the tents.
Hawke allowed a small sigh to escape her chest. The warm voice of her lover murmured into her ear, "Hawke?"
She could feel the unasked question, and purred, "I'm fine Fen, better than I have been for weeks." She nuzzled a little closer to his warmth, "It's nice to rest for a while, isn't it, with our friends?"
"Mmh." He hummed in agreement, then cleared his throat, speaking in that special voice she recognised from his reading lessons; "Though they carry nothing forth with them, yet in their entire journey they lack nothing. For where-ever they go, they be at home."
Hawke lifted her head slightly, "That's nice, is that from a book?" she remarked as she rose from her seat, brushing dust from her clothes. Of course she was pretty sure it was from a book, but he loved to demonstrate his new reading ability; like a child with a new toy.
Fenris nodded, easing himself upright after her; one of his knees gave a protesting crack at the movement but he ignored it, "Just a quote from some famous adventurer. I forget whom."
They moved as one towards their tent, and Hawke, feeling a little more daring with her beautiful elf, allowed her hand to drift over and grab his as they walked. Refusing to comment on the gesture, she continued their conversation as if she weren't clutching his palm tightly. "I'm home with all of you. You're my family." She sighed and turned her head towards the stars for a moment, "Brothers and sisters in battle, so to speak."
Fenris eyed her with his olive-green eyes, feeling a smile trying to break across his face; Maker, but she was beautiful in starlight. She thought she was the lucky one, when they were clearly the ones who had all the luck in the world to have met her.
"Quam ego velim aliquando fratri." He murrmered.
"Hrm?" was her gentle reply.
"Nothing." He reached out to the tent flap and lifted it, allowing her to enter the warm canvas space. "Just thinking about families."
A/N: Translations courtesy of google. In order they are;
1. I love you, beautiful
2. I hope some day I am more than your brother.
^^; I kinda think Fenris feels more comfortable saying all these things in a language Hawke can't understand, just until he's ready to say them to her for real.