(Hey all! Hisa-me Kurai here! This is my first stab at a Final Fantasy VII Fic, so go easy on me, okay? That having been said, READ ON!)

"ARRGH! I keep getting killed! This sucks! Damn you, Yuffie! You suck! I knew I shoulda gone with Tifa!"

Jayden Schwartz threw her PS2 controller across the room to show her frustration and flopped back angrily against her bed.

She had been stuck on the same level for over two weeks.

TWO.

FUCKING.

WEEKS!

Jayden had never had trouble with video games before.

She was a pro…not that anyone else knew that.

Jayden Schwartz, you see, is what is more commonly known as a "closet" gamer.

For all those unfamiliar with the term, I shall enlighten you: a "closet" gamer is called such because no one knows how into video games they actually are; not their schoolmates, not their family or friends.

They prefer no one to know about their pastime, so they won't be labeled, and as far as Jayden knew, she was currently a label free, living ghost and she was determined to keep it that way.

Not to mention Jayden was the top "closet" gamer in the state Washington, perhaps the entire country.

She had lost count of all the lives she had taken in the online version of World of Warcraft and was surprised her account hadn't been frozen.

Which is why she was so pissed that she couldn't get past this one stupid level.

"Jayden, hun? You okay in there?"

"Shit." Jayden thought to herself, stretching forward, ripping out the connections linking the PS2 to the T.V. and stowing the game system under her bed.

The door was opened shortly after as her mother entered the room.

"Honestly hun, you really should let me redecorate." She sighed wistfully, eyeing the Flogging Molly and Rammstein posters lining the walls, unmade bed and dirty clothes piled on the floor.

"Bleh." Jayden replied, sticking out her tongue with a smirk on her lips, "I happen to like my sty."

Her mother frowned slightly, eyeing her only daughter's nose piercing and dyed black hair with bright red streaks, recently cut so that it bounced against her shoulders.

"I honestly don't see why you destroyed your perfectly beautiful hair, love." She muttered, shaking her head, "Or decided to punch a hole in yourself…but your money I suppose."

There was an awkward pause.

"Well, I just wanted to check in on you." her mother said clumsily, turning to leave.

"Mom, I know you've been on edge since Charlie was mugged, but he walked away with a black eye and the guy didn't even get two blocks before Charlie got his wallet back." Jayden said in a strained tone, "I'm not going to be bludgeoned to death if you don't watch me every second. Okay?"

"I know." She sighed as Jayden rose off the floor, "It's just that…that…well…you're my baby girl. I'll always worry about you."

"Okay, okay." Jayden said, frustration tingeing her voice slightly, "I'm heading out, alright?"

"Have you got your-!" the woman's question died on her lips when Jayden shook the LG Chocolate an inch from her nose.

"Yes, mother." Jayden sighed, rolling her pale blue eyes. "I'll give you a call when I get there, and check in every hour, on the hour, just like I always do. That sound alright to you?"

The woman colored faintly and nodded as her daughter walked past.

"I'll be seein' ya, mom." She called over her shoulder, already making mental plans of all the Gaming stores in Seattle she was going to hit before nightfall.

"What the hell are they doing here?"

"Would you cool it Yuffie? You haven't had time to recover properly."

"Answer the question."

Tifa Lockhart forced Kisaragi Yuffie back down as Reno and Rude moseyed across the room.

"I invited them." Cloud Strife murmured, leaning against the wall restlessly, "We'll need all the help we can get against Sephiroth. Even if it comes in the shape of a former enemy."

"But-" Yuffie sputtered, trying to sit up.

"Down." Barrett Wallace said severely, pushing down on both shoulders, "If you get angry, your wounds will re-open."

"Ooo." Yuffie pouted, sticking out her lower lip sulkily.

"Our focus needs to be on the Remnants." Vincent Valentine said coolly, "They're gathering more, and more Geostigma infected children by the day. His resurrection draws nearer with each passing day. Perhaps Jenova's as well."

"That's why we're putting the past behind us." Rude said evenly, "For the greater good."

"As well placed as your intentions may be…" a silkily intense voice drawled from the doorway, "I'm afraid it will do you no good."

The group whirl around to find the Remnants, Yazoo, Kadaj and Loz, lingering in the doorway, looking far too superior for their own good.

"Well…how did I just know this was gonna happen?" Reno muttered under his breath, flipping the switch that started electricity flowing through the pole in his hand.

Cloud had whipped the Buster sword off his back so quickly that a large track mark now marred the wall behind him.

"It seems as though there will be no time for pleasantries." Kadaj commented, unsheathing his own blade.

Everyone, including the injured Yuffie, was on their feet.

"Let's end this quickly." Loz commented, sparks flying around his hand, "I want to find Mother."

Everyone charged at once.

There was a huge flash of light as powers converged on one another…then all was silent…for awhile.

"What do you thinks going on?"

"Must be cosplayers from a gaming convention or something."

"Maybe they're lost."

"They must be putting on a show. How cool!"

"Their costumes are really good."

Weapons still poised at each other's throats, the group paused to take in their surroundings.

Shattered glass was on the ground near their feet, for one thing…originating most likely from the blown out store window not five feet away from them.

Then there was their general local: they had started out in the back of a dark, smoke filled bar. Where they were now, wherever it was, was neither dark, nor was it smoke filled.

It was bright, open, spacious and filled with people…many of whom were stopping to point and stare at them.

SPLT-RLRLRL

"Oh…dear god, this is a cosmic joke."

Whipping around at the unfamiliar voice coming from behind them, they found themselves confronted by a very harassed looking teenager who by all appearances, couldn't have been older than seventeen...and had just dropped some kind of drink on the floor by her feet.

Clearly dyed hair, dressed like a punk: black on black with a splash of red and white here and there for color.

What struck them the most though were the eyes: she had the eyes of someone infected with the Geostigma; pale blue, but green seeping into the iris from the outer rim and leaking outwards from the pupils giving them a catish appearence.

"This…isn't real." She muttered, shaking her head, "I'm hallucinating. I knew the smoke coming from Kyle's room was Yes-I-Cannabis."

She pushed her way through them, still talking to herself.

"You're not going anywhere." Kadaj murmured coolly, his voice suddenly more threatening than it had been in previous encounters for some unknown reason as he held his katana on level with this strange girl's throat.

"Yes, yes I am." she replied, shaking under the force of his icy stare, "Why? Because I can. Why? Because I'm hallucinating, that's why! There's no way in any mighty manner of existence that you could be real!"

Tifa and Barrett both looked at the girl like she was crazy, which was appropriate considering the circumstances.

"Annnd why wouldn't we be real?" Tifa demanded, crossing her arms and tapping her foot.

"Because! Because you're all game characters." She said with fierce conviction in her Geostigma eyes, "All of you! And your weapons! And Sephiroth, even though he doesn't appear to be here right n-!"

"What do you know about Sephiroth?" Cloud demanded, eyes widening slightly in surprise.

"Not much because I never really cared about one winged angels!" she shot back. "Now if you'll excuse me, oh cute little figments of my imagination, the bunnies have clearly eaten my brain so I have to go find a retailer to sell me a new one…"

Without paying any heed to Kadaj's sword, which was currently aimed at her throat, the girl pushed past Yuffie, making a mental note aloud that that wasn't real either even though she had made physical contact with the thief.

"They weren't real, none of this was real." She chanted as she started to walk down the thoroughfare…until Reno and Rude ran after her and grabbed the girl by the arms, dragging her back as she tried to shake free of them.

"You're not supposed to be able to touch me!" she announced loudly, "You're not real! You're a stress and pot smoke induced delusion!"

"Stop saying that already! It's creepy!" Reno said.

"You don't know the HALF of it!" she spat scathingly, head drooping and sagging slightly in the grip of the Turks, "I knew it, I was afraid of this…having schizophrenia…it runs in the family…Gramma had it. I was afraid I'd go crazy like her, too many video games really do rot your-"

Rude finally clamped his hand over the girl's mouth and she struggled against him until after about a minute she appeared to relax and the Turk chanced removing his hand.

"Now…" Rude started, keeping his voice even, "How did you know that? Who have you been speaking to?"

"Not your Rufus Shinra, that's for sure…" she replied. Rude and Reno exchanged a shocked look and stared at the rest of the out of place group with shaken eyes.

"How did you-" Yuffie began.

"Know that? Wow, that seems to be the million dollar question of the year!" she announced, throwing her hands up into the air.

Rude and Reno grabbed her again and held both her arms in a much tighter grip, keeping her still, "Geez… weren't you guys listening? YOU'RE ALL SQUARE ENIX GAME CHARACTERS! NOW LET ME GO!"

"Do you have a medical history?" Vincent demanded to know.

"I wish! At least that would explain what's happening to me right now!" she cried, tears dancing in her eyes, a look of, 'why isn't anybody helping me,' etched all over her face.

"Stop being ridiculous." Cloud commanded, "How do you know these things?"

"Oh, don't make me say it again!" she groaned.

It appeared though, she was debating her next move internally though, and everyone readied themselves for a possible attack…that never came.

"Okay, this feels real enough…" she commented, pinching herself with long, black polished nails, "Owuch! Okay, felt that…but that was me touching myself. Someone else pinch me! Slap my arm! Do something!"

Loz was more than happy to comply and slapped her viciously across the face in a manner reserved for an abusive boyfriend.

Cloud and Barrett reacted swiftly to counter this act of assault on a woman, but the Remnants saw opportunity, took it, and fled.

"Ugh…felt that." The girl moaned, cradling her cheek, blood running down her jaw line.

"Please..." Tifa asked gently, stepping forward and offering her a handkerchief to stanch the bleeding, "How do you know about us?"

"If I try to explain it, you won't believe me…" she mumbled dully, "You already think I'm crazy anyway…"

"Apparently you do too…" Reno responded, which resulting in Rude backhanding him across the back of the head.

Vincent peered out at the girl testily out of the corner of his eye and after a time, finally said, "Try to explain it."

"Are you saying there's a chance you'd believe me?" she asked skeptically, looking at him.

"No. I still think you're either insane, or putting up an act. But I'll humor you for now if it will help us to obtain new information on Sephiroth." Cloud replied.

"Oh thanks." She snorted, rolling those Geostigma eyes of hers.

"Okay, where I come from… there's this series of CG games called Final Fantasy." she began.

Barrett glanced at Cloud's expression. Something flashed across his eyes, but he didn't speak.

"There a new story in each series, and in Final Fantasy VII, the story revolves around all of you and your attempts to stop Sephiroth from being ressurected." the girl continued.

"Let's see. The characters were as follows: Cloud Strife…his weapon is a broad sword; Tifa Lockhart… her weapons are her fists and feet; Reno… his weapon of choice is a retracting shock rod; Rude…he primarily uses his fists; Barrett…he uses his prosthetic arm as a weapon; Kisaragi Yuffie…an oversized shuriken. I can never win when I use her; Vincent Valentine…an excellent shot with is weapon of choice, the Cerberus…would you like me to go into the details of the Remnants?" she asked.

There was a silence at the outpouring of so much personal data at once.

Then Vincent said what everyone expected him to, "We should kill you for knowing so much…it's dangerous."

The girl eyed him carefully.

"I'll have you know that it's not my fault… as far as I know you people aren't even real. I don't understand what you're all doing here, but I don't think you were placed here to kill me." she retorted shrewedly, annoyance coloring her words.

"I don't understand how you can have so much information in such detail!" Reno announced. "But you can't expect us to believe that you're just some girl from another world and we are supposed to be…made up."

The girl sighed deeply, looking as though she was expecting this response, then apparently was struck with an idea.

"Ha! I know! I'll prove it to you! First off, my name is Jayden Elliot Schwartz and I was born on May 19th, 1989!" she said triumphantly, "According to my knowledge, it is 2006 and I am 17 years old and scheduled to start attending Cornish Institute of the Arts in July 2007."

As she said this fast-paced string of words, she unzipped her backpack and retrieved out a wallet.

Upon opening, a school I.D, reading Jayden Elliot Schwartz, complete with photo smiled up at them. There was the evidence, plain as day, smirking gleefully in all of their faces.

She also showed them both her social security AND ATM card, both with her name on it.

She even produced a Linkin' Park concert ticket from only two days before.

"I'm not lying." She sighed irritably, stuffing the contents of her backpack where they belonged, "I swear, I never expected you guys to be as skeptical as my mom, but apparently I was grievously misinformed."

"This is…this is just too unreal." Yuffie murmured, sitting down hard.

"Look, why don't we head back to my place." Jayden suggested, "I'm pretty sure someone's called the mall cops by now. And with the day I've had, that's one pain in my ass that can easily be avoided."

"…fine." Cloud agreed after a time, "But if you try anything…"

"I wont." Jayden retorted quickly, looking more vexed with each passing second, "If anything, this will just prove my case."

(A/N: Ah the joys of public transportation. Will Jayden have enough to cover the bus fare for all of them? And if they make it to Jayden's house withOUT getting arrested for toting weapons in broad daylight, there's still the matter of the Remnants on the loose somewhere in Washington. R&R!)