Hi!! It's me again. Yes, I'm sort of putting my other story on a halt, 'cuz I'm outta ideas…and a little sober. Well, this story will be a promo on my behalf, as in, if you like it (cuz it starts out as a one-shot) tell me. If u don't, just vote 'no.' WELL, on with my story!!
Well, it's a good day for me, the sun is shining, my dad got promoted in work, my sister in moving out for college so I finally get my own room, and to make things even better—I'm dead. Yes, you heard me, I'm dead.
No, on behalf of my wiser and more prominent self, I never was happy in life, so I sort of like being dead. But the down-side is no friends, no family, not even a stuffed toy to keep me company. Yes, I love stuffed animals. Call me a baby if you would, but I love all things soft and cuddly. No, I'm not a sissy. Yes, I'm sure of it.
Well, here I'm standing—err—floating before the head honcho himself—God. No, God does not like me. But he doesn't hate me either. Let's just say that he likes me enough to bring me back to life, but he hates me enough cuz he's bringing me back as a bunny. Not just any bunny—a stuffed one, you know, as in a toy? Well, I for one, think this is sort of a sick joke, because my name is Usagi, or 'bunny' in Japanese. No, I'm not entirely Japanese. Cross that out—cuz I'm a pure breed Chinese. Ok, I'm not pure breed Chinese either (insert the anime sweat-drop), I'm part Irish, Russian, Siamese, and Chinese. Pretty crazy mix, huh? That's a story for another time, another place, and another author. But, I'll tell you this: my parents are crazy about all things Japanese—all the way from the comics to the traditional Koi (the fish) on a stick.
Well, here's my story: I was walking along, and BAM I was dead. Okay, that's not entirely what happened. I was walking, and I was killed by an explosion. But, the explosion was caused by me, bumping into a person that was smoking. This led to me indirectly causing a fire, the cigarette—still lit—combusting into flames over a gas leakage—which happened to come from my brand, newly-bought car. So pretty much, I caused my own death—no, I do not know/ or really care about what happened to the other guy. Let's just say I'm feeling spiteful—for having a smoker involved in my death—and not to mention, supremely selfish right now. I'm aggravated that I'm dead, but happy that I'm gone from the hell in between—if you know what I mean?
Maybe this death was meant for something more important? Maybe it's to teach people not to smoke? No, I don't actually realize how ridiculous that sounds, cuz it sounds pretty important. Now, a sudden mood change. I don't know why, but I feel really teary right now… Let me cry for a bit—for whatever reason I don't know why. This has turned out to be a very…interesting day. It looks good, but you never know when God is gonna backhand you.
Now, I sorta miss having my ditzy family. I wanna have the mom that burns my food, the dad that always comes home form work pms-ing like a sissy cuz he's worried about getting fired, and the twin twerpy brothers that always annoy me as if their goal in life is to make me miserable.
What did that damn god say? Did he just say that he's sending me to another dimension? This can't be happening! Why would a guy, who knows you're dead, wanna try and send you farther away from your family and friends? Why me? What did I do to disserve this?
I want a session in court!! Where's my lawyer? Oh, wait, I don't have one…I'm too young to die! Wait, I'm already dead… What else can I say to make me sound desperate? Wait, who's Koenma? God, you maybe mighty and all, but you hafta speak up a little more. What's that you say? HEY!! Are you calling me thick-headed?
I don't wanna do baby-sitting as a stuffed bunny! Why do I, Usagi Valcov, have to watch over a bunch of dumb-nuts called the "Spirit Detectives?" Are you insane? No, I'm not the insane one. Are you the kind of guy that like to watch people suffer? You're pretty much making that impression on me… Oh fine, I give. I'll go along with this plan of yours, but that doesn't mean I'll like it… What's with that sneer on your face? DON'T TELL ME YOU'RE ALL SMIRKING AT ME!! I don't know what you're up to, but I sure as hell don't want a bunch of strangers deciding my fate. Cripes, you're all planning something evil for me aren't you? Grrr…I'll revolt against this stupid author, I'll rebel I tell you!! No!! Don't take me away yet!! I never got to say good-bye!! Good-bye Mister Cuddles!! Farewell Mrs. McDoodle!! Sayonara my bestest stuffed buddies!!
Well? Did you like it? Vote yes or no on your opinion of the story. It's all or nothing! If you wanna know what happens to Usagi say 'yes.' If you don't like this story at all, say 'no.' It your opinion is neutral, or you don't care, say 'maybe.' I'll count up the votes in two weeks to a month. Thank-you very much for reading this story!