Into The Blue
A tale of passion, lust and the true power of love's insanity.
A/N: Hello everyone, I am back! I hope there are still some of you still out there willing to read the insanity that my mind puts together and I truly hope you enjoy this tale. It will be smutty and romantic and crazy and true Delena goodness
Prologue: A Heart's Possession
"You only need one man to love you. But him to love you free like a wildfire, crazy like the moon, always like tomorrow, sudden like an inhale and overcoming like the tides. Only one man and all of this."
― C. JoyBell C
Elena sat nervously in the silence of the small vacant waiting room and tapped her perfectly polished fingernails against the smooth polished wood of her chair. She glanced up at the oversized digital clock on the wall above the door that led to the back offices and noticed that it was now nearly ten after two. She let out a sigh and silently cursed Stefan for making her come here in the first place. What did he think that this was going to accomplish? One session here and suddenly things between them were going to be back to roses and wine just like they had started out a year before? Elena shook her head and looked down at her black stiletto's as she tapped one of them rhythmically against the plush carpeting and let out yet another frustrated sigh. Of all the possible psychiatrist's in the Northern Virginia area he had to send her here of all places. On one hand, she understood why he had sent her to this doctor and it pained her to think of the reasoning behind it, but on the other hand even Stefan should have known this was a bad idea, she definitely knew it was a bad idea.
"Ms. Gilbert?" A woman's voice called softly from the now open door just a few feet in front of her and shook Elena from her internal questioning. Elena looked up quickly and noticed a petite blonde woman standing with a yellow file folder in her hand and a pen stuck behind her ear. The woman smiled warmly at her as their eyes met and nodded toward her.
"Yes, right here." Elena said as she reached for her purse that sat at her feet. The woman stepped back and opened the door wider behind her.
"The doctor will see you now, Ms. Gilbert." She said warmly. Elena nodded, picked up her purse and then followed the woman through the door and down the long hallway that led to her doom.
Elena took a couple long deep breaths as she slowly followed the kind and soft spoken woman down the long hallway that led her to the appointment she had been both looking forward to and dreading ever since the moment she had been forced into making it nearly two weeks before. It amazed her how booked up every psychiatrist in the area had been when she had originally tried to book with someone else, but deep down she knew that no matter what, she would end up in this office at some point whether she wanted to or not.
"He's just finishing up on the phone Ms. Gilbert; can I get you some water or tea?" The blonde woman asked kindly as she paused in front of the closed oak door at the end of the hallway. Elena shook her head as she came to a stop behind her and mimicked the calm smile on the woman in front of hers face.
"No Melanie, I am fine." She said softly with a smile. Melanie nodded and then turned the doorknob and backed up as she ushered Elena in.
Elena walked slowly into the large dimly lit office and stood in silence as she watched Melanie walk over to the oak desk in front of them and set down the file folder and then smile as she quickly exited the room and closed the large oak door behind her with a click. Elena looked around the room before her and smiled as she admired the red painted walls, the dark but beautiful paintings that hung on them and the romantic antique sculptures that adorned the small tables surrounding her. The room was warm and smelled of vanilla. It reminded her more of personal den than a shrink's office, but then this was no ordinary shrink.
"I understand and I will take care of it like I told you I would. Look, I am already behind today, I will talk to you later, alright?" She heard the man behind the desk say roughly as he pivoted slightly in his large leather chair that was facing the window overlooking the parking lot. It was amazing how she had ignored his presence as long as she had, but she had gotten better at pretending and ignoring over the past few months than she cared to admit.
"Bye." He finished sharply as he dropped his cell phone onto his desk and then turned slowly in his chair and slid the yellow file folder in front of him. He glanced down at the lettering on the outside of the folder and then let out a small sigh.
"Ms. Gilbert." He said softly and then slowly looked up from his desk. Elena swallowed as she took in the man in front of her. The doctor that sat behind the large oak polished desk looked to be thirty at the most and wore black from head to toe. The skin that peeked out from his black button down dress shirt was a perfect ivory and his hair that fell messy onto his forehead was the deepest onyx she had ever seen. He wore his clothes fitted and the defined cords of muscles bulged against the crisp fabric and nearly left Elena breathless as she tried to tear her eyes away. However, nothing about his body compared to what she saw when she met his strong and compelling stare that instantly pulled her in.
Trying to put into words what Elena saw when she stared into the eyes of the doctor that sat only a few feet in front of her was something that even had she been a poet she didn't think she could ever quite master. His eyes were the color of the purest ocean and held the intensity of the strongest waves in the fiercest storm. His gaze spoke louder than any scream she had ever cried and at the same time held a light brighter than anything she had ever seen. To say his eyes were beautiful would have been an insult and to say they were consuming…well that would have been an understatement.
"Dr. Salvatore." She said in a voice that came out much quieter than she had intended. The doctor smiled gently as he looked up at her and Elena had to remind herself that she needed to breathe as she tried to keep her eyes level with the man in front of her.
"Please, have a seat Ms. Gilbert. I do apologize for you having to wait so long today, but unfortunately one of the other doctor's in our office is out sick today and I have had to take on a few extra patients today." He said in a professional clipped tone as he pointed to the smaller leather chair on the other side of his desk. Elena nodded and tried to avoid his penetrating eyes that seemed to look through her as they moved over her.
"It's alright Dr. Salvatore, I understand." She said quietly as she found her way to the chair he had pointed to and sat down. The doctor nodded and looked down at the file folder in front of him. He ran his fingers slowly over the cover and then opened it gently. He flipped through a few pages and then raised his eyes back to Elena's.
"So Ms. Gilbert, why don't you tell me a little bit about the reason why you are here to see me today?" Dr. Salvatore asked as he reclined slightly in his chair. Elena smoothed her hands over her knee length black pencil skirt and nodded as she tried to find her words she was sure she had when she was on the other side of the door.
"I, um, am not really here on my own accord." She said in almost a whisper. The doctor nodded and smiled a devilish smile that just barely touched the icy blue eyes that had never left hers since she had begun to speak.
"Ah yes, your fiancée wanted you to see me. He believes you have been distant lately. He is worried you are depressed and that possibly something is wrong that you don't feel you can share with him." He said matter of factly as he pretended to glance down at the notes in front of him. Elena nodded and turned her head quickly to the other side of the room.
"No he is worried that I am cheating on him and he figured this was the best way to find out." She said softly as she turned her eyes to the floor. She heard the doctor shift in his chair and looked up to meet his eyes. He slowly ran his fingers through his thick black hair and reclined back in his chair once again.
"Do you want to talk about his worries today, Ms. Gilbert?" He asked as his eyes held hers in an almost unwilling trance. Elena shrugged her shoulders and crossed her arms protectively over her chest.
"Sure, that is what he is paying you for." She said sarcastically. The doctor smirked slightly at her and Elena felt her skin begin to burn as she tried to pull her eyes away.
"Alright then, why don't you tell me what has been going on lately. Tell me about your relationship with your fiancée'." The doctor said softly. Elena swallowed and finally looked away toward the window.
"Well, our relationship started out great. Everything was wonderful. He was the perfect gentleman, he was romantic and everything was perfect. He was the definition of the perfect boyfriend and treated me like a queen." She said softly as she continued to stare out the window and out over the now crowded parking lot.
"Then what happened?" The doctor asked and even though she couldn't see him she could feel his eyes on her and his gaze intense. She took in a deep breath and smiled.
"Then I met someone that fucked the whole thing up." She said as she looked back over to the doctor and met his eyes once again. The doctor swallowed and leaned back and crossed his arms over his chest in a mirror of the woman in front of him.
"Tell me about him." He said softly as his eyes ran over her. Elena felt her palms become slick with sweat and she quickly laced her fingers together in her lap and pulled herself up straighter in her seat.
"He is smart, but incredibly cocky. He is inhumanly beautiful, but he knows it and uses it to get what he wants. He is controlling and manipulative and never backs down from an argument. He has a horrible temper, does not tolerate not getting his way, and he drinks like a sailor, not to mention curses like one." She said in a long breath as she spoke quicker than she had originally planned. The doctor nodded as he watched her begin to fidget nervously in her seat.
"He sounds like an ass, why would you let a man like this into your life when it seems you already have the perfect man?" He asked with an edge of sarcasm in his tone as his eyes bore into Elena's. Elena smiled to herself as she untangled her fingers from her lap and lightly drug her index finger across her bottom lip. She looked up and met the doctor's stare as he watched her every move intently.
"Because when I am with him…." Elena started as she felt her breathing begin to pick up. She stared at the man in front of her as her heart began to pound in her chest and memories ran rampant through her mind. The doctor tilted his head toward her and licked his lips.
"When you are with him what, Ms. Gilbert?" He asked in a much deeper tone than he had used with her since she had entered his office. Elena swallowed as she felt the room around her become incredibly warm and almost uncomfortable.
"When I am with him he consumes me. He gets under my skin and he controls me. He commands my attention, demands my submission and takes my breath away with only a single word. He possesses me in a way I cannot explain and a way I could never deny." She said in a breathy voice as she quickly looked back down to her hands.
Elena heard the doctor let out a sigh and then slowly looked up and locked eyes with him once again. His pale blue eyes were on fire and said more than the words that slipped from his lips. He swallowed and then looked down at his desk and pretended once again to look over his notes.
"You should never let anyone possess you, Ms. Gilbert." He said in nearly a whisper. Elena leaned back in her chair as she ran one of her hands through her long chocolate brown hair and flipped it over her shoulder.
"If you were a woman you would understand. You would understand the power a man can have over you." She said as her voice filled with a newfound danger. The doctor looked up and leaned back in his chair, appearing slightly more relaxed once again.
"What power does he have over you, Ms. Gilbert?" He asked as he held her eyes with his. Elena bit her full bottom lip between her teeth and took in a breath.
"He has the power to make me compete for his affection, crave his attention and beg for his touch. I want him more than I've ever wanted anything in my life; he makes me want to be his…need to be his." She said softly. The doctor ran his hands through his already messy black hair and nodded as he cleared his throat.
"Sounds like a very powerful man." He said as he raised a brow at Elena. She nodded as she let out a breath.
"You have no idea, Dr. Salvatore." She said as she narrowed her eyes at him. The doctor nodded and slowly raised his hand to his mouth.
"Are you sleeping with this man?" He asked as he ran his hand quickly over his lips. Elena sighed softly.
"Yes." She whispered, never letting her eyes leave the doctor's.
"For how long?" He asked quickly.
"About two months." She replied. The doctor nodded and let his fingers move through his hair once again.
"Are you still sleeping with your fiancée?" He asked as his eyes dropped to the desk in front of him. Elena smiled and dropped her eyes.
"I haven't for a while." She answered softly.
"How long?" He asked quickly. Elena raised her eyes back to the doctor. His crystal blue eyes had darkened slightly and his tone was more serious than before. He raised his eyes back to hers and she felt her blood begin to pump faster through her veins.
"Is that information needed to know for my mental well-being…doctor?" She asked sarcastically. Dr. Salvatore looked up at her intensely and clenched his jaw tightly. Elena felt a small amount of fear move through her, but she held the doctor's intense stare.
"Please answer the question Ms. Gilbert." He said roughly. Elena sighed.
"It's been about two months; I am guessing that is one of the reasons why I am here. Men go to such great extremes when they aren't getting laid." She said with a smile as she felt a bit of bravery take over. The doctor smiled and relaxed slightly against his chair.
"Sex is very important to a relationship, Mrs. Gilbert." He said as he stared at her. Elena nodded.
"Is that your recommendation for my recovery, doctor? You would like me to go home and sleep with my fiancée?" She asked with continued sarcasm. The smile faded from the doctor's lips as fast as it had come.
"Sex may be important Ms. Gilbert, but it doesn't solve everything." He said more sternly. Elena tilted her head and narrowed her eyes toward him.
"It might not solve everything, but it sure helps." She said with a smile. The doctor turned his head toward her and licked his lips.
"Did you learn that from the man that is fucking up your life, Ms. Gilbert?" He asked with his own hint of sarcasm. Elena smiled.
"I've learned a lot from him, Dr. Salvatore." She said as she raised one of her perfectly arched brows at him. The doctor pushed himself up from his desk and stood behind his desk. She smiled and let her eyes move over him as he moved. She bit her lip as she tried to keep her eyes on his and not on his form fitting black dress pants.
"Does the sex make up for the destruction this man is causing in your life? Is it worth it, Ms. Gilbert?" The doctor asked in a serious and professional tone as he moved from his desk over to the table next to his book case. He turned his back to her and poured himself a drink as he awaited her reply.
"Yes it does. Does that make me a bad person, Dr. Salvatore?" She asked sweetly as she leaned forward in her chair.
The doctor set the bottle of bourbon back down on the table and raised his glass to his lips. Elena watched as he closed his eyes and drank the entire glass in one swallow and then set the tumbler back on the table. Slowly, he turned around once again and met the chocolate brown eyes staring back at him. He leaned back against the table and crossed his arms once again.
"You are not a bad person Ms. Gilbert, but it sure sounds like this other man in your life is. It doesn't sound like this man is stable and that is not good for you or for anyone for that matter. You deserve someone who will treat you right and have a positive effect on your life, you deserve better than someone that tries to control you." He said softly as he looked down at the floor. Elena felt the smile on her face fade and suddenly her blood began to rush in her veins. Her heart began to pound violently and before she realized it she was standing. Rage moved through her quickly and before she could stop herself she felt her words rushing out of her mouth much louder than she intended.
"Is that why I am here…doctor?! Did my fiancée' send me here so that you could talk some sense into me so that I can march happily down the aisle next to someone that I don't love and ride off into a boring sunset just so he doesn't have to lose? Is that what this is about? This isn't about what I want, it's about what he wants and he figures you can persuade me to want it too, right?" She screamed as she stared at him. The doctor pushed himself effortlessly from the small table and moved closer to the angry woman challenging him.
"This isn't about anyone trying to persuade you, Ms. Gilbert, it is about you doing what is best for you and doing what is good for you. You deserve better than someone that is going to fuck you up and make you feel like you have to belong to him to be somebody. God damnit, can't you even see how fucking insane that even sounds?" The doctor yelled back. Elena balled her fists at her sides and moved closer to the man in front of her that she was sure probably wasn't supposed to be yelling at his patients, but in that moment she didn't care.
"Most people wait their entire life to feel half of what I feel when I am with him. Not you or fucking Stefan is going to talk me out of that. I am not insane, I…" Elena stopped mid-sentence and caught herself before she uttered the words she knew would make even this situation even worse. She backed up slightly as she watched the doctor move closer to her with a look in his eyes that terrified her.
"You what, Ms. Gilbert?" The doctor asked as he moved closer to her. Elena stepped backward as she felt her heart beat even faster in her chest.
"Nothing…I forgot what I was going to say." She said quickly. The doctor moved closer to her once again and soon Elena's back hit the oak door behind her. Dr. Salvatore stopped a few inches in front of her and even though he wasn't touching her, she could feel the heat radiating from his body.
"Bullshit, answer my question." He demanded roughly. Elena swallowed and turned her head toward the opposite wall and let out a breath.
"It's after three Dr. Salvatore, I really should go. I'm sure you have patients waiting." Elena defended quickly as she tried to catch her breath. The doctor shook his head and moved a step forward.
"Answer the question, now." He commanded in a rough tone as his hand hit the wall with a thud next to Elena's head. Elena swallowed and felt tears sting in her eyes as she licked her dry lips.
"I…I love him." She whispered as her voice began to shake slightly. The doctor let out a breath and gritted his teeth.
"No you don't. You only think you love him. He isn't good for you, you deserve better." He said between his teeth as he looked down at the floor between them.
"I know what I feel. I love him no matter what he is or who he is. I have loved him for a very long time and I can't lie anymore, I'm so tired of lying." She whispered as she studied the doctor's troubled face and felt her hands begin to tremble at her sides.
"How could you love someone like that, Ms. Gilbert?" He whispered as he raised his pained eyes to hers. Elena smiled softly and let out a breath as she held his gaze.
"He saved me when no one else could. He showed me what life truly was and I have loved him ever since." She whispered. The doctor looked up and slowly closed the gap between their bodies.
"He's an idiot and he doesn't deserve you." He whispered as he raised his hand and softly tucked a strand of her long hair behind her ear.
"Yes he does." She whispered as she caught his hand and tangled her fingers with his. The doctor closed his eyes and let out a breath.
"I'm sorry he made you come here, Elena." The doctor whispered as he dropped his forehead against hers. Elena untangled her fingers from his and softly touched the side of his face.
"I'm not." She whispered. The doctor slowly opened his eyes and locked them with hers. He slid his hand down the oak door behind them and slowly turned the lock on the door.
"You said he makes you want him to possess you, how bad do you want to be his, Elena?" He asked in a dark and animalistic tone. Elena swallowed and stared into the wild blue eyes in front of her.
"More than anything." She whispered. The doctor let out a breath and then slid his hands down her sides and pulled her closer to him. He ran his fingertips down the length of her skirt and then in one swift movement pushed it up to her hips. He leaned his head down towards hers and let his lips hover just over hers until he felt her body tremble against his.
"Tell me what you want, Elena." He whispered against her lips. Elena felt her mouth begin to water as she anticipated his taste.
"Touch me, Damon. Please." She whispered. Damon slid his hand down her thigh and let it settle between her thighs. He ran his fingertips over the wet material of her lace panties and swallowed roughly as he pushed his knee between her legs and used it to push one of her legs up onto his, spreading hers further apart.
"You should never have to beg for what you want, Elena." He whispered as he began to rub his fingers over her and smiled wickedly as he felt her become wetter with his every touch.
"Then why do you always make me?" She asked as she licked her lips, trying desperately to get a taste of his as he continued to speak just over her lips. Damon swallowed again and let out a breath as he let his lips touch hers for a second before he pulled back slightly.
"Because it turns me on, because it makes you wet and because when I finally get my tongue under that skirt of yours you seem to beg all on your own anyway." He whispered seductively as he slipped his fingers under her lace panties and gently brushed his fingers over her clit. Elena moaned and Damon closed his eyes as he breathed out.
"Damon, please." She begged as she pushed her hips against his hand. Damon pressed his lips against hers, but he did not kiss her once again. He simply let his lips mold over hers as he met her desperate stare.
"Tell me I'm the only one, Elena." He whispered against her mouth, now his voice sounding slightly desperate. Elena moaned as she felt his tongue slide against her lips as he spoke.
"You are the only one, you know that. I only want you." She whispered as she felt her body begin to shake as his fingers slid over her clit once again.
"I'm bad for you, very bad." He whispered again as he added more pressure to his touch. Elena moaned and nodded.
"I don't care, I need you." She moaned as she let her head drop back on the hard oak door behind her. Damon slid his lips down slightly and slowly sucked Elena's bottom lip into his mouth. He bit down gently on her soft skin and then pulled back as he heard Elena's moan vibrate through him. He knew at that point there was no time left for talking. He had known from the moment she had walked into his office that day that this was how all of this was going to end. Hell, if he was honest he knew how this was going to end two years ago when he had first laid his eyes on her in those green scrubs that she had despised from the moment she had been forced to put them on.
"I will only hurt you if we continue this, Elena. You know that and so do I." He whispered as he looked back into the chocolate brown eyes that haunted his every dream. Elena shook her head.
"I don't care. Hurt me then. I love you Damon, I can't stop, I don't want to." She whispered as her body started to tremble and tears once again began to sting her eyes. Damon nodded and slid his hand to the back of her thin neck and tangled his fingers in her hair. He pulled her roughly toward his mouth, but stopped just before her lips crushed against his. He stared into her eyes and pressed her tighter against the door and against his hard body.
"I don't want to either and if I remember correctly, I have been described as someone who enjoys getting what he wants." He said softly as he smiled against her lips. Elena smiled and felt her tears begin to subside as she felt herself get lost in the light radiating from the blue eyes staring into hers.
"Whoever said that must have been crazy." She said as she bit her lip gently. Damon licked his lips as his smile faded.
"Insane." He whispered softly. Elena swallowed, but before she could say anything in return Damon crushed his mouth against hers. Elena closed her eyes and finally tasted the lips that she had been craving for nearly two years and no matter how many times she had tasted them her craving never seemed to subside, but only became more intense. She tangled her fingers in his thick hair as she felt him pull away from her lips and then watched him intently as he sank down her body and onto his knees. She wanted to look away from the intensity of his stare, but somehow after all this time she still couldn't. She bit down on her lip as she felt his mouth come in contact with her delicate wet flesh and as her head fell back against the door behind her she felt her mind wander back to the first time she had seen those blue eyes. It was the first time she had ever seen a psychiatrist and the last time she ever wore the color green.
Alright everyone how was that? I've had horrible writers block and I had an idea for a fic and so I decided to go with it, so what did you all think? Yes, this will be a smutty fic and yes it will still have a story line. There will be love, lust, bad Damon and good Damon and a whole lot of Delena. Please read and review and let me know what you thought; hope I'm not getting too rusty at this. Thanks for reading, please review!
P.S. Do we like how incredibly bipolar these characters act in this prologue lol? Trust me, its important to the story, review please! Love you all:)