Fish
Crackfic (?)
"Kuro-wan, do you like fish?"
That was the beginning of the ninja's demise today, just that one simple question. And by answering it, he was only quickening the inevitable.
"You mean to eat?" He had to ask, because the mage was who'd asked. If it had been the Princess, or the kid, he might have just said yes. But with the mage, every thing had a double meaning, and a two sided answer. It was like a kitten baiting an old tomcat to play. Even if the tomcat only hissed and spat, the kitten was still getting what it wanted.
"Both. To eat and just in general." Fai smirked. "The puppy's getting a little on edge, eh? It's not good to be on edge all the time Kuro-chan; someone might just tip you over one day." Fai was laughing under his breath, poking the ninja's arm, just to provoke him. It was so much fun on his behalf to mess with the ninja's brain every day. Though he feared one day, the puppy might lose it and go mad with his own childish antics.
"…Yeah, sure, Fish are okay. What, you planning some special dinner for some random occasion? Fish day or something?"
"No silly! I was just wondering." Fai looked towards the two teens. Mokona had landed them in an aquarium this time, so they'd taken advantage of their surroundings and were taking a short break at the time. Now, Syaoran was busy trying to keep track of Sakura as she ran around the room, trying to see all the fish in the tanks at the same time. It seemed like an impossible feat, but the boy seemed to be managing it well. That is, until he turned for a moment to look at Fai and Kurogane. When he looked back, Sakura was almost gone, happily looking for the penguin tank.
"P-Princess!!" In a rush, he ran after her, almost tripping over his own feet. Fai laughed, looking once more at Kurogane. The ninja snorted in half amusement. "The boy really needs to learn to let her be every now and then. Anyways, it doesn't look like this is a bad world."
"Appearances can be deceiving Kuro-tan, you should know that, you silly puppy, you!" The mage happily patted the ninja, to which he received a murderous glare. "Hey…Kuro-chan."
"What?" The ninja could feel it now, some strange feeling he'd grown over the time. It was the feeling he always got when the mage was beginning to work the little wheels in his brain. When he was plotting…
"What do you say to get an easy job…"
That was it. That was the last straw, he would kill the mage after all this time, and he would make sure of it. He would get his sword back from the witch and slice the lunatic into pieces to small to be seen and then would burn them along with the manju. "K-Kurogane-san?" Sakura stood nervously behind the counter in the café. "I think that your job fits you- I mean, your costume's really nice!!" She turned red, and shrunk a bit, anxious for his answer.
"Hn…I smell like salt water."
"Hyuu!! Now, if you stand still long enough, I can rub these dead fish on your cost-"
"YOU'VE DONE ENOUGH!!" He struggled to move, but the costume refused to budge. The damned sea water fish smelling thing refused to move. It was as if the fish costume had something against him, as if the mage had programmed it in someway so that it would ignore his every decision and make the opposite one all on its own!
"F-Fai-san….Kurogane-san…the manager said that we should all get busy, since they're open in just a few minutes…"Syaoran was blushing madly, knowing fully well how much of an idiot he was looking like right now. It didn't help that the Princess had told him how nice he'd looked.
"Come on kid, let's get as far as possible from this crazy ass mage…"Kurogane grumbled on his way out the aquarium. Complete disrespect to the title he had as a ninja….And the kid…well the kid had never looked so…embarrassed in his entire life. He looked like he'd just wanted to die rather than have had the Princess look at him at his worst. It was as if he'd taken a critical hit to his manly ego or something…
"Now don't forget, Kuro-chi!! Smile, wave, and point them all in the right direction! But do it as if you love it Kuro-pu! If not, you'll scare them all away, you big scary puppy you!!"
Kurogane grudgingly waved at passing cars as Syaoran muttered lowly," Welcome to Sea World, the place where all fish can be free…Please visit the Dolphin Café, we have special non-seafood specials for all the fish lovers-"
"Mommy, why is scary looking man dressed up like a stupid fish?"
"Hey Dad, how come that wimpy looking guy's a shrimp? It makes him look a wuss!'
Syaoran wished for no more than to shrink away in a hole and disappear. Kurogane on the other hand, gave the girl a glare so horrifying, she screamed and burst into tears. Her balloon had popped when he glared at it too. That was the power of Kuro-woof's powerful laser glare…
"MAGE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!"
fin
I had fish for dinner and remembered sea world…or rather my brother kept mentioning that the fish I was eating was a fish from sea world and I was undermining the whole fish population for every fish I ate…not quite sure what he meant, but anyways, it gave me the idea of Kurogane in a fish suit. One that made him appear incredibly stupid. It would also make him mad as hell at Fai. XD hope you enjoyed!! K