A/N: I have not abandoned Queen of Pages, I've just had a shitty time lately. I couldn't sleep so instead of forcing myself to write something I wasn't in the mood for I wrote something to maybe make up a little for my absence as well as amuse other readers. One-Shot.

Has NOT been read over or proof read in any way. If you notice typoes that just take away from the story so much you feel like spooning your eyes out, let me know and I'll fix it as soon as I can.

Bottle It Up

Kel stretched her stiff arms and rested them on her hips, leaning back, smiling as she felt and heard a satisfying crack of her body adjusting itself. She was finally back at Corus for a week's stay for reports, new and updated news about the Scanran's, and maybe a little bit of relaxation and catching up with her other friends. It was mid-June, so it was more than hot and she had grown more and more comfortable with presenting herself in gowns instead of her usual breeches and shirt. She popped her window open, her callused hands brushing over the splintered wood without a wince, letting her sparrows in. As she fed her newer flock of sparrows, the spring had brought her new additions, from her palm she heard a knock at the door.

"Prince," she said with a bright smile and a nod of her head.

He had matured quite nicely. His entire body was toned, after all he had to be even if no one would let him fight on the front lines. Roald's body seemed to fit every curve of the causal shirt he was wearing in almost a glove like fashion. Kel guessed that Lalasa had made it. The prince seemed to have decided it was time to grow facial hair, similar to his fathers, it looked hauntingly delicious on him, not that she would ever tell him, or anyone that.

"Welcome back Lady Knight," he replied, a grin of his own fixed onto his features. He stretched his arm out in a question to ask if he was allowed to enter, she nodded. He settled onto one of the chairs, straddling it and crossing his arms over the top of it. "How's the border coming along?" he asked.

Kel let the sparrows eat the last of the crumbs on her hands before she dusted them off, seating herself onto the window sill, the sun lighting her from the back. "The usual, lots of dead people, lots of hacking at one another, tho', we've started hacking at each other less, which I consider an achievement."

Roald laughed. At the very least to those who knew Kel, her problems with her own people were understandable. No matter how well she seemed to do someone always had to think she was sent from the Black God as a mean joke on the elderly and their future children. It seemed that even her new batch of refugees had some dark tumors among them, she'd had to get more creative with her punishments, they were running out of the space in the stocks she had tried to lock them in previously.

"At least it's action, I sit here singing papers and listening to my dear wife prattle on about things I'll never understand," he remarked idly.

This startled Kel. For several reasons. The first, is that the prince, although they WERE friends, usually didn't talk to her so casually, secondly, if she had heard the undertones correctly, the prince seemed a little displeased with where he was in his marriage. Like a good once-upon a time Yamani, she hid her surprise and rolled with the conversation. "Yamani business?"

Roald relaxed inside. Kel wasn't the only one who could hide their true emotions. He had been determined to close the gap between his friends and himself, a rift that had been created despite his best intentions because of his status and what others expected of him, but he had been rather frustrated lately, and with Shinko as well, so it wasn't as if he could mention it to her, she might throw her 50 pound fan at him at the mention. Not that he expected it, she was usually pretty level headed, but he had been growing a cynical streak since his last visit to, well, real people. Roald was relieved that Kel hadn't stopped the conversation.

"Say Kel."

"Hmm?"

"Could I treat you to a dinner tonight?"

Kel's inside dropped, turned inside out, and then haphazardly placed themselves back where they thought they belonged. It almost sounded like he was asking her... to... well, a date. But, friends had lunch together right? She always dropped by to eat a meal with Dom or one of the other men from the Third Company, Quasim and Lerant, to her surprise, were frequent additions. Surely this wasn't anything special, maybe he just missed her, well, any friends, or wanted out of the castle, or... she was prattling inside her head and with horror noticed the long silence she had created between them. Kel bit her lip and tried to recover, her heart hammering in her chest.

"Hmmm. I don't think I have any official business tonight... so, I suppose that'd be fun. Anyone else coming with us?" she asked, trying to continue to look at him.

Roald's stomach finally unclenched after she had spoken, even if he did feel a little odd that she would ask that, not because his intention wasn't to get her alone, it was because didn't know how to say it without over-stepping imaginary boundaries. After all, she was always a reliable and level-headed person to talk to, he didn't want to share his dilemma's with everyone they knew. "If more of them come in tonight I'm sure, I asked Neal already but he's busy with his father for the rest of the evening."

Now all he had to do was pray that Kel didn't actually go check upon this situation and would blindly trust his word for it. Hope was a lovely thing.

"Oh. Well, that sounds nice, where should I meet you?" she asked him, assuming that they would not be spending the rest of the day together.

"I'll find you when it's time, wear something nice," he said with a smile as he walked out of her room, closing the door after himself.

Kel collapsed back onto the bench, having gotten up to be polite as he left. Could he know? She wasn't sure how she felt about being alone with him, if that did occur. It's not like they hadn't been before. She let her chin rest on her hands as she curled up, staring into the distance beyond her window. It was true, she had been cursed with far too handsome friends, and the fact that her wants seemed to be going through them like playing cards made her sick to her stomach. Neal had faded, Cleon had eroded, and Dom had failed. Third Company had been assigned to work with her at New Hope for awhile, during which she had watched Dom grow significantly attached to one of their new refugees. She was happy for him, and happier still to notice her own feelings dissapearing, that is, until she had made her first visit back to Corus.

She was angry at herself, very angry, once again she questioned herself, was she really fickle? Did she always need someone to throw her unrequited and unknown feelings at? If so, she'd rather cut her heart out, tie it in a box, and bury it on an island. Kel had thought that she had kept her true yearnings a secret, especially because of the person it considered. She was a bad friend, and her body rejected every second she spent thinking about it, even worse, she know had another reason to want to bash her skull through a wall, what would make her think that the prince would care enough, well not care, but notice these things about her for similar interests, and get her alone. He was a married man, to a beautiful, smart wife, one whom she had befriended long ago and continued to be friends with, more than that, he was the future king of Tortal, what was she thinking?

"What would my dear mistress be agonizing herself over today?" a kind voice asked from the door, she hadn't even heard it open.

To cover up her distress, even if it was Lalasa this wasn't something she wanted to get out. "I have a dinner to go to that I was instructed to dress nice for. I don't know what I'm doing."

Lalasa grinned, "A date?" The word made Kel's stomach plummet past her knees and six feet under.

"No, I think just an outing," she replied, with a serious face, not sure how to feel about the smug smile, and not in the mean way, on Lalasa's face.

"It is nice to see you back, let me see if I can find you something suitable to wear."

At the same time, Roald was avoiding the rest of the world by marching himself up the Needle. He didn't mind heights and knew most people did. The only other person he might expect to come up there was his father, and he was busy. He scooted to the wall and placed a chair next to it, tilting it and leaning it back. He wasn't sure what he was doing. He was awkward to anything but fake social interaction with the rest of the monarchical people of the world and wasn't quite sure how to treat Kel, she was a strange creature, very captivating because of it. Everything about her was different, he had been attracted to that part of her since they had first met. It wasn't just a curiosity about the Yamani's, but the unique way she carried herself, every other warrior woman that he knew had something... special going for them. Alana had her magic, his mother had her blinding beauty, Daine had her Wildmage, and Buri had her history and status. Kel, she was, well, ordinary, well cultured, but ordinary. It wasn't that she wasn't pretty, because she was and he had to wonder why less people noticed it, but it wasn't a special weapon of hers, it didn't hypnotize like some women's did. But he liked it. Besides, it was the ordinary that made her so extraordinary.

He wondered what he would say to her. Why he had picked her to flood his life story to, or at least his current problems. Which problems to mention, why they had been alone, because they would be if he had anything to do with it. His thoughts bounced in wild trains of thought from one edge of the spectrum of his mind to the other as he watched the sun begin to set. Only when a sudden chill road up the back of his shirt did he think it was time to prepare for the night out. He idled his way down the Needle, caught a servant he knew and asked him to get a bath ready, and strolled lazily towards his and Shinko's quarters, it would take a little bit for them to get ready, that, and he was avoiding Shinko, he was almost truly afraid that if she were to see him and ask where he was going, she would invite herself along, or at least ask to be invited, and it would look strange if he did not agree. Lucky for him, as he slipped into his room and into his bath she was nowhere to be seen, perhaps she was having tea in a viewing room, writing odd poetry with her friends. He dressed himself not in the finest he had, he didn't want to attract attention, but something at least classified as classy.

Kel had spent the day until she had finally managed to get dressed working out her insane bubble of anxiety by beating things and riding Peachblossom, her body was a bit sore but the bath she had taken had solved most of that problem. She was now sitting in her room, her stomach in knots, her hands clasped together, looking out into the dusk waiting. She almost jumped to the ceiling when she heard a rasp at her door. She stood up, calmed her breath, and swallowed before walking towards it, her body tightening up as she was Roald. He looked beautiful, it didn't help that he was smiling.

"Gorgeous," he said with a grin as he held the door open for her.

They had idle conversation on their way out of the castle, they each took a horse provided by Roald, Peachblossom wasn't a nice city friendly horse, and Hoshi looked too comfortable to move, so Kel had requested to borrow one for the evening. She wondered where they were going as Roald led them through a back way around most of the city to the edge of it.

"It's good, I promise," he said as he watched her examine the surroundings, he assumed she had never been here before.

They eventually stopped at a tiny restaurant, pub type of place, a fourth of the building was sunken into the ground, and to get in you had to go DOWN stairs. It was quirky, and Kel already liked it. Roald led them to the second floor into a corner where they could barely see across the town, the last feeble sunlight drifting away. A servant came to each table to light small lamps, it was quietly busy, a nice, comfortable setting, if not a little romantic, although Kel assumed it was just her imagination. They each ordered something to eat, Roald promising to pay, although neither noticed, each took a pretty heavy selection of alcohol. Kel for her nerves, and Roald to help himself open up. They dined in idle conversation as they had on their way to the place, before Roald started talking after a final swig.

"Is it wrong of me to be unhappy?" he asked her. "I know people find happiness if they try hard enough. At least, that's what I've been told. If you try hard enough, and think on all the bright sides, you can always be in some type of happiness. But, what if even if there was some type of it there before, that could've been true, what if that fades? But everyone wants you to be happy still and you're not allowed to be, well, unhappy."

Kel clutched her cup, half to keep it from slipping out of her hands and half to keep it from jittering. "I'm afraid you'll have to be a little... less vague," she said, almost disappointed that he had only wanted to take her out to vent on her. But she did feel a little honored that she had chosen her to talk to.

They sat in silence for a bit before he talked again. "I don't want to be with Shinko."

Horror and glee filled Kel. Glee because it meant that at least somewhere in some far away fantasy he was available, and horror because she felt that way first instead of focusing on the life destroyer it would be. But she couldn't tell him that.

"Is there something wrong with me?" he asked her, tilting his head to the side and staring her straight into the eyes.

"Well.... what went wrong? Maybe you can fix it," Kel suggested feebly, taking a mental mallet to her own feelings as they tried to rear their ugly heads.

"What if I don't think it can be? What if I don't know? What if I just know it's wrong?" he asked, almost forlorn. He had briefly forgotten that Kel was also friends with Shinko, and that he had just put her in a bad position, but he was cut open, and needed something to make it right.

Kel hushed for a bit, suggesting more ways to fix it seemed to be the 'bad choice' way to do it. But if she didn't, she would be betraying Shinko, wouldn't she? 'I suppose, at the very least I can be honest with him.' "Not everyone is happy in an arranged marriage... it really isn't far fetched for you to feel that way. It is a serious shame that you do, but, there's nothing wrong with it, with you." 'How could there be ANYTHING wrong with you?' she thought wistfully.

They sat in another round of silence before Roald began to stand up, nodding his head for them to leave. Kel stood up as well, unsure if she had done something wrong. He paid the waiter and they left together, the streets were pitch black by now, the occasional lamp hanging from a building providing a bit of illumination. They climbed back on their horses and began the trek back, Kel following Roald because she did not know the way.

"I'll walk you to your room," Roald finally said as they were cleaning up their horses.

"Okay."

The heavy silence continued as they made their drunken way back to Kel's room, they would occasionally glance at each other, each having words stuck in the back's of their throats.

"Well, good night, I guess," Kel said as they reached her door and she opened it. She took a step inside before she felt a hand rest on her arm.

"Thank you."

Warm lips descended on hers before she could react. She was melting. Kel closed her eyes and pressed herself closer, leaning into the warm body, arms circling around her as she let hers rest over his shoulders. Their lips pulled apart reluctantly before they came together for another one. Roald gently guided her backwards into the room, closing the door behind him and popping the lock on it with a hand he had detached from Kel's waist. He did not want interruptions. The sound of the lock shutting brought Kel somewhat out of her own stupor, every 'common sense' part of her body was screaming at her to wake up.

"Roald I-"

He only shook his head and guided her backwards to her own bed, pushing gently to where she toppled backwards, eyes wide with confusion. He would regret this in the morning, she would regret this in the morning Kel thought to herself. Instead of bringing this subject up, she let Roald lean on top of her, showering her plum lips with more hungry kisses. His hands wandered to her shirt, opening up the front lacing's to tug it and her breast band down, hands slipping underneath to run themselves over her breasts, a satisfied sigh coming from him as he let his fingers run over them. It wasn't just that it was Kel, it wasn't as if Shinko was one for anything too sexual. But this, this was right, and he didn't know why.

Kel blushed as she heard the sound, almost embarrassed that her nipples were hardening at his touch, wondering if there was a way she could hide them from him. She watched his face as he slipped the rest of the dress from her shoulders, pulling it down to her ribs, exposing her breasts completely. The way his eyes took the sigh in left her body burning. She began to protest as he leaned his head down, his tongue making a circle around her right nipple, flicking it before bringing his lips down onto it. Kel's protest turned into a half whine as he tugged at it with his teeth, using one hand to prop himself up, and the other to continue stripping Kel.

She was almost ashamed to tears as to how happy this made her, and how good it made her feel. Instead of pushing him off of her as his hand slipped under her skirt, pulling it up from the edges, she opened her legs wider to allow him to settle in between them, her hips almost jumping against him as she felt the erection confined in his pants resting against her thin panties. Feeling shy, she prayed that he could read her mind instead of her having to do anything herself. It wasn't that she had never seen a man naked, or was completely unfamiliar with the process, but it wasn't like she was an expert, it was uncharted territory. "What do you want?" Roald whispered into her ear, noticing the hungry, but almost forlorn looks she was concentrating on him.

Kel swallowed. She didn't want to speak. She rocked her hips against him, blushing because she felt it bold, and blushing even more from the soft hiss that Roald emitted as she did. He grinned, if not a bit drunkenly, sitting up enough to strip his own shirt off, leaving Kel to stare at the well defined muscles that adorned his body. "Lift," he told her softly as he pulled the dress off of Kel, taking her panties with him, stopping for a bit to stare at Kel's exposed self. She crossed her legs at the staring, looking to the side.

"No," Roald said with an almost commanding tone, leaning down and moving her legs open again with his hands, letting them run down her thighs, a hand circling around to her ass and sliding up between her pussy lips, causing Kel to moan despite her blind determination not to. "Beautiful," he said as he tugged his own pants down, Kel sitting up to watch, unexplainable excitement rising in her as she watched him slowly slip them off, well aware that she was staring. She swallowed nervously as his naked erection became visible to her. There weren't many men that you could compliment on having a beautiful cock, but his, looked almost good enough to eat. Kel licked her lips, something she would later blame on the alcohol, and sat up, shyly running her hand along the base of his cock, dizzily tilting forward to let her lips rest on the tip of it, noticing with secret pride the way Roald seemed to lean into her touch and that the satisfied noise emitting from his mouth was her doing.

"Ladies first," he said as he pushed her back down, his hands venturing where his mouth would soon follow.

It was a night for fantasy books, stories never mentioned again. In fact, neither party did. Kel was called away soon after, leaving them very little time to talk about what had happened, even if neither had decided whether or not they wanted to, and what it would mean. But they each had a haunting feeling of longing, and an almost soul sure assurance that the next time they would meet, there would be no pretensions.

A/N: If I get into any more detail I WILL be writing a porno. And I'm not sure I'm as good as writing them as I am drawing them. Left open ended just in case I get another sleepless night, and it seems like maybe it could be a story to develop seriously. So, yeah.