Summary: During DH, Luna Lovegood spent some time in the Malfoy Manor basement because of her father's magazine. What if Narcissa Malfoy thought she might make a good pure-blood wife, and brought her up to the living room to verify this?

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Luna Lovegood: Wife Material?

"And what was your mother's maiden name?" Narcissa Malfoy asked the young witch sitting on her couch.

"Fawcett. She was the one who warned my father about Nargles, when they were both still young," Luna Lovegood answered, smiling sweetly.

"Hm." Narcissa looked at Luna with narrowed eyes, considering the pure-blood. She looked so unsuspecting, especially for someone who was recently captive in a basement for no known reason. "What house did you say you were in at Hogwarts?"

"Ravenclaw, as were both my parents. I wouldn't know about my grandparents, though, because I never met them. Low life expectancy seems to run in the family."

"Indeed…"

"Yes, Mother died when I was nine. Father is still alive, probably because the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks want him to find them. They have life-extending abilities, you know."

What? Narcissa shifted her eyes to the coffee table in confusion, and wrinkled her nose slightly. She hated losing control of conversation. "Would you like some more tea?"

"Yes, thank you. I do believe my father's tea is purer in magic; I can ask him to send you some ingredients if you'd like," Luna said, taking the tea and gulping it down fast, though silently.

"Maybe later, Miss Lovegood." Narcissa smiled yellow and lowered her chin to the left, slightly, trying not to enlarge too much her agitated nostrils. The girl made her feel like going back to Hogwarts, throwing so much obscure information in light conversation. "I'm sorry for keeping you so long in our basement. It was a necessary precaution."

"Some sort of Quarantine?"

"You could say so."

"Do all your visitors have to spend a week in your basement, Mrs. Malfoy? That explains why Draco never had many girlfriends, despite being quite handsome." The girl's eyes widened slightly, and she cocked her head to one side.

Narcissa sipped her tea slowly, keeping her eyes on the girl but not answering. The girl could only be joking; and joking around with your captor during a Wizarding War is hardly the best course of action.

"Draco doesn't have girlfriends unless I approve them for marriage," Narcissa finally answered, just as Luna seemed about to start blabbering again.

"Oh, I see. My father won't let me date, either. It's a good thing he warned me about the danger of pre-marital relation with boys… I wouldn't want Nargles surrounding me like they surround the Patil twins."

Those bloody Nargles again. Narcissa rested her hand on her collarbone and raised her chin high, taking a mental note to find out about the creatures. She placed her teacup on the coffee table that stood between the two witches.

"No, you definitely wouldn't. Your father gave you wise advice." To some extent the girl was wife material; she was untouched and could hold informed conversation.

"My father is quite knowledgeable. He is the editor of a magazine, actually: the Quibbler. It hasn't peaked yet, but when we find the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks there'll be no denying the truth we divulge." Luna nodded slowly with a wide smile on her face.

Narcissa raised an eyebrow. The girl was gloating about the reason she was captive in a basement. She might be virgin, maybe even wife material, but Narcissa would be sure to keep her away from Draco.

"When all this blows over, -- the War, I mean, -- people will become more interested in the information we give out."

Narcissa now raised two eyebrows. Oh, the War? You mean, this silly little thing? I'm sure it'll blow over in no time, no harm done.

"Certainly," Narcissa played along with the odd girl. Certainly keep Draco away from her. "You seem very involved with your father's magazine."

"Not really. My father gets frustrated when an issue is badly received. I wouldn't want that frustration for myself. I'd rather live a nice, tranquil life."

Married? Narcissa shuffled a little in excitement. She loved being the match-maker of pure-blood couples. Not to my Draco, obviously, but she'll make a nice wife for my friends' sons…

"Looking for Crumple-Horned Snorkacks in Sweden…" Luna went on, looking intently at the ceiling.

Or not… She'd might make a nice pure-blood housewife if she just talked less.

"Maybe I'll convince a friend to go with me to Sweden!" Luna said, looking back at Narcissa, suddenly less sedately, and leaning conspicuously forward.

Why does it look like she'll invite me?

"I'd ask you to come, but then you'd bring Draco, Mrs. Malfoy."

What's wrong with Draco? Narcissa clenched her jaw; Luna was talking too fast to allow her to say anything.

"Draco has an unusual amount of Nargles around him." Luna whispered, confidentially, as if she'd read Narcissa's mind.

Not the Nargles again! Maybe she's not wife material at all.

"I'm considering asking Harry to join me, when he's finished his business with You Know Who," Luna went on, returning her gaze to the ceiling and blinking furiously.

Well that settles it. Narcissa rose from her chair smiling sourly and smoothed her robes out. Cocking her head to a side while holding her chin high in the air, she cleared her throat. "Let me show you more of the house, Miss Lovegood."

Not wife material.

"That would be lovely Mrs. Malfoy. Harry's always wondered what the Malfoy Manor was like."

And back to the basement with you.,,

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A/N: I had no grand aims with this but to have fun… And I did! \o\ Based on a challenge proposed by .net/u/1996191/

(Anachronistic Anglophile)

Thank you for the plot bunny; it was irresistible! Reviews, anyone?

By the way, sorry if it seems like a Luna bashing… It isn't, I swear… *cowers from flames* Love to my scant reviewers!