Chapta 1: what's goin 2 happen {BILL}
AN: dis story is 4 goffs or emos and if ur a prep or a pozr den fok of!111111 dis is r interpellation of da trublodd series n if u dno't liek it den don't read it ok!!111
Returning to Bon Temps was…a difficult decision. But one I knew I had to make if I ever wanted to see Him again.
"It ain't over," Bill said as he applied some lip balm in the rear-view mirror. "Can't be."
He drove up the driveway of teh old Compton house and brought in what few possessions he had deemed fit to bring with him. Lip balm and his pilates DVDs.
"Well," he thought to himself, "The sun's still down. Might as well go have some fuuuuuun…maybe I'll even run into h-h-Him." He licked his fangz and strolled out into the night.
He wandered through Bon Temps until saw a bright glowing sign: 'MERLOTTE'S Bar & Grille'.
"Hm, I wonder if they have any True Blood," he thought, referring to the synthetic blodd developed by some japanese chemicalists and which some vampires used for sustenense.
He walked in.
"Ooh, suga, you's pale as my momma's ay-ass," said a chocolatey smooth voice from the kitchen. "Some Lafayette lovin' should clear that right up."
"I must resectfully decline your invitation, you fuck," Bill said politely. "You see, my heart belongs to another."
"It ain't yo heart i'm after, it's your Johnson," Lafayette replied as he smeared mayonase sexily across his totally ripped torso. "Mm suga," he commented. Bill's pants tightend, but he shook his head (top one) and turned away.
"What can I getcha?" asked a bubbly blonde telepath to his right.` Her nametag read 'Sookie".
"Can you get be a bottle of True Blood?" he asked. "O negative, if you have it. "
"Sorry hun, fresh out. Sam don't cater to vampires. But I do," she continued flirtily. "I got all the blood you need," she said, gesturing towards her lady parts.
"I think I will take my patronage to a different establishment," said Bill uneasily. He had had a distaste for women ever since he had become a vampire, especially gap-toothed bitchy ones. He headed towards the door, muttering under his breath as he did so.
"Ugh. Women."