Author's Notes on Chapter One:

Dark: The first chapter of the soon-to-be epic (in length, I assure you, only possibly in content) Twilight Crack Fiction. We started this project because originally we'd intended to do a Twilight RP, the way we think Twilight should have gone. Let me make this very clear: We do NOT like Bella. She is the epitome of a Mary Sue, and she does not exist in this universe. The OCs that have and will appear in this fiction are made specifically not to act as Mary Sues or Gary Stu's, but more for the process of plot progression and storyline.

Also, the beginning of this fiction and the beginning of Twilight may seem vaguely similar, but this is simply for the purpose of two teenagers in high school establishing a relationship, as otherwise this would not make as much sense (if it makes any at all in the first place). Also, this similarity will end after the first chapter, I assure you, so please do not flame on such things, because this was merely the beginning, and the Edward/OC pairing will be shoved out of the spotlight (not forgotten, just not the only focus) after this start.

As for canon characters, Edward, Emmett, Esme, Seth, and Alice are played by myself, Dark Silk, and Jasper, Jacob, Carlisle, Emmett (occasionally), Rosalie are played by Falling Moon.

The OCs that will appear, or have appeared, are Abbi, Ember, Jules played by Falling, and Altair, Frey, and Jamie are played by myself, Dark.

Now, on with the fanfiction!

Forks High School was, in a word, boring. The Cullens had gone to too many high schools to think any differently of Forks'. The curriculum was average, the courses were unexciting, and the students...were even more mediocre than any other school they'd attended. Well, what was to be expected of a place so small?

Edward had rapidly fallen into a routine at Forks High, and since everything was so...painfully average, he hadn't thought to expect something...above average, or at the very least something that wasn't as ordinary as everything else in Forks. Well, to be precise, he hadn't expected the someone.

The move from England to the United States had been surprisingly easy. Or at least, that's what the adults of the Baker family thought. Their only child, Abbi, however, disagreed passionately. The movers had lost several boxes of her things... Things that were very precious to her, and that alone was enough to put her in a sour mood. Forks was the straw that broke the camel's back.

She HATED Forks with a passion. It was small, wet, and overall felt...claustrophobic to her. Everyone knew everyone here, which was odd to her, having spent her entire life in London. Yes, London was dreary, but she could handle that; it didn't rain constantly. And it was never Dull there.

The young redhead sighed, staring at a piece of paper in front of her. Her school schedule. She sighed once more, and headed off in what she hoped was the direction of her first class.

Edward didn't fail to notice the new presence of an unfamiliar human, and the different...scent of her made him frown slightly. The teacher, of course, chose that exact moment to ask him to answer an equation, though he didn't let the new human distract him from giving the correct, flawless answer. He'd see more of the strange girl later, he was sure.

She'd taken up one of the empty seats, and was now trying to figure out what they were learning. She knew the curriculum here was different from what she'd learned in England, but she hadn't been aware of how different it was. Frowning, she nibbled on her lower lip, and toyed with a lock of crimson hair.

Edward glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, frowning at the way her scent made his veins burn in a way they never had before. His fingers threatened to snap his pencil in half as he forced himself to concentrate on the drab lecture the instructor was prattling on about.

Oblivious, Abbi continued to scribble down notes and try to figure out what in the world they were going on about. She knew things were different, but hadn't realized how different the education system was. She was tempted to ask a question, but she didn't want to look like a complete dolt in front of her new peers. Silently, she chewed on the end of her pen, and tried to focus, cursing her parents for moving in the middle of the year.

It didn't take long for the class to end, and Edward made quick work of gathering up his books and supplies, hurrying out of the room, to get to his next class. It was a relief to be at least a little further from the girl's scent -- though it didn't help much.

Abbi slowly packed her books and paper away, trying to absorb the information she had just learned. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Edward, but didn't get the chance to take a good look at him. All she saw was a blur of pale skin and copper hair. Biting her lip again, she headed to her next class.

Unfortunately for Edward, he shared his second class with Abbi, and it made him twitch a few times. It would look too strange to just up and leave, though, so instead, he decided to tough it out. He would, however, talk to Carlisle, and hopefully have a chance to go hunting.

Abbi wasn't sure if it was the same boy, but when she saw him in the same class, she felt her stomach flutter a little. He was handsome, there was no denying that. She bit her lip, and went to her sit, trying to push thoughts of the boy from her mind so that she could focus on her class work.

Edward was quite accomplished at denying and ignoring things that were too cumbersome, and so for the next hour, he ignored Abbi. She was pushed from his mind, but the unfortunate truth was that he simply couldn't block her scent enough. He didn't smell it through his sharp nose, but it seemed to seep into his skin, making sparks and flames dance in place of where his blood should have been. When the class was over, he was on his feet in an instant, and he managed to get out before anyone else did.

Abbi watched as he left the room quickly, and wondered for a moment who lit a fire under his rear. Chuckling to herself, she gathered up her things and headed for her choir class. It was the one class she was looking forward to for the day. She'd loved music all of her life, and so the fact that this tiny school had a choir class, even a simple one, made her a bit happier.

Edward, thankfully, didn't have choir, and didn't share anymore classes with her until lunch. It was a small comfort to fall into the routine of that meal -- get food that seemed... edible, and seem interested in it until the lunch hour ended.

Lunch was... Awkward, to say the least. Abbi hadn't really had a chance to talk to anyone, and therefore, no one to sit with. She sighed, and got some food that consisted of a salad, a sprite, and some rolls. She looked around, trying to find somewhere to sit, and eventually did.

People tended to gravitate around the new girl, since new students were considered to be quite a commodity at Forks High -- new people were really a commodity to Forks, in general. There was one girl who'd managed to worm her way close to Abbi, and was doing her best to chat Abbi's ear off, trying, in her own, confused way, to get to know Abbi.

She answered the question politely, though, sometimes, she wasn't exactly sure how to answer some of them. Her accent was thick, and she often answered in slang, then reminded herself that she was in America, and quickly corrected herself, cursing herself mentally.

She often got strange looks from the others at the table when the slang was used, but once she corrected herself, they all just started bursting out with laughter.

This always brought a blush to her face, but she managed to chuckle along with them. This was one thing she'd always been good at. Laughing at herself. She was normally very confident, and now that she had people to talk to, she was starting to get that back.

They all seemed quite fond of Abbi -- well, all except the Cullens. Their table seemed to be radiating chill and unfriendliness. Of course, they were usually like that, merely because having humans approach them was... inadvisable and not particularly desirable. The teenagers at Forks weren't worth the breath it took to speak to them.

Abbi had snuck a few glances at the table, but the odd aura radiating from the occupants made her uncomfortable, and didn't look back after that. She was much more comfortable with the other teenagers, and found that lunch passed quickly. Once the bell rang, she gathered up her things and headed for her next class, feeling much more comfortable.

The Cullens, of course, dumped their food without touching it, and headed off to their respective classes, while Edward was...unfortunately, sharing another class with Abbi. And he was settled right next to her.

Abbi blinked when she realized the only open seat was next to the beautiful boy whose name she still didn't know. She smiled politely, and pulled out all of the things she needed. She tried not to stare, but found herself glancing at him out of the corner of her eye more than once...she mentally smacked herself, and watched as the teacher started class.

Edward's fingers were dangerously tight on his book, and the text was starting to creak with disapproval from the rough treatment. It was very close to ripping down the middle, but Edward was too distracted to notice. He... definitely would have to leave after this class. He needed to find Carlisle, to get whatever help his adoptive father could offer.

She was oblivious... until she heard the creaking of the book. Blinking, she looked over at Edward. "Umm...are you…alright?" she asked in her thick British accent. She looked genuinely worried for him, with worry lines crossing her face.

It was only when the girl spoke that Edward noticed the strain on the book, and he let up a little, though the sound of Abbi's voice sent the tiniest of shivers down his spine. "Yes," he replied stiffly. "Yes, I'm fine."

She nodded, and looked back at her book. None of this was making any sense to her, but she still was feeling to proud to say that out loud. She sighed, and went back to taking notes, not understanding much.

Edward watched the teacher diligently, and after the bell rang -- after what seemed like an eternity to Edward -- the vampire was out of his seat, and headed for the door.

She watched him and noticed that he'd dropped his notebook. "Oh um... Hey! You dropped your notebook!" She called out after him, holding the book in one of her hands. She didn't want him to forget those, he might need them to study.

Edward froze when he realized she was calling him, and shuddered as he turned around, going back to the girl to take the notebook. "Thank you," he said, ever polite, if not stiff, his dark, dark eyes bored into hers. There were dark, almost-purple marks under his eyes, what looked like bruises -- as if someone had given him two black eyes, or he hadn't slept in weeks.

She couldn't help but stare, her hazel eyes glinting with curiosity. It took her a moment, but then she smiled politely again, and said, "You're welcome." Her voice was soft, but with his superior hearing, he could easily hear it.

Edward nodded, slipping the notebook back with his other books, then turned gracefully on his heel, striding back -- but instead to a class, he was going to the parking lot, to get his car and go to Carlisle.

She watched, then went back to gathering up her things, and headed for her next class. She wasn't sure what it was, but something about him made her curious. Sighing, she pushed him from her thoughts, and went back to trying to learn.

Edward wasn't in his final classes, and he also wasn't at school for the next few days, with absolutely no sign of him in school, or at the Cullen lunch table.

Abbi continued to go to her classes like normal, slightly worried about Edward. She wasn't sure why, but it worried her that he wasn't there. She thought maybe she'd offended him or something, but... she couldn't be sure.

Edward was back at school three days later, however, and he looked... much improved. His eyes were a clear, honey color, and the bags under them were significantly lighter, almost nonexistent. He was also much less... tense.

Abbi had noticed the change in him, but wasn't sure if she should say anything. She didn't want to offend him, after all. She sat silently through all of the classes she had when she didn't sit next to him, and then, when she got to the class she sat next to him, she took a deep breath, and went to the seat next to him.

Edward looked up at her then with... a pleasant, charming smile as she settled next to him. His books were neatly set beside him, and thankfully, none of them looked the worse for wear. They would be saved from being snapped in half.

She smiled back, and got her things out of her bag. After three days, she was starting to understand things, which made her glad. She didn't like being so confused.

Edward looked back down to his notebook for a moment, then back up at Abbi, taking a moment to decide what to say. "I apologize for being rude, before," he apologized, flashing Abbi another smile.

She smiled softly, and set her books down. "It's fine," she replied, the smile not present on her face, but obvious in her eyes. "I didn't take any offense to it. I figured you weren't feeling well."

Edward hummed quietly. "Yes, I've had... an unpleasant couple of days," he said with a tiny smile.

Abbi nodded. "I'm glad you're feeling better," She replied, putting the last of her things on the desk. "It's not very fun to be ill."

"It certainly is not," Edward agreed with a quiet, almost musical laugh.

She smiled at that. God... He was gorgeous. And now that he wasn't in such a bad mood, he was rather pleasant to be around. She found herself smiling at that thought, and shook her head slightly, trying to clear the thought. "Um, if you need any of the notes or anything, I can lend them to you," She offered up, wondering if he would accept or not.

Edward blinked for a moment, and then smiled. "That would be quite helpful," he assented lightly, though he turned his attention to the front when the teacher started speaking.

She nodded at that, and made a mental note to give them to him at the end of class. She kept them organized in a binder, which had been helpful, because she often referenced them when she didn't get something. When the teacher started speaking, she turned her attention to him, and started taking notes.

Edward was doing the same, writing the notes in his fluid, curly handwriting. He was able to write rather quickly, surprisingly -- but then again, he'd had years of practice.

Her own writing was rather plain, as most girls seemed to have unique styles of writing. Hers was more... Efficient, and like her. It was also rather quick, if only because it was plain.

Soon enough, the teacher closed the lecture, and the students were gathering up their things, to leave the room and head to the next class. Edward did the same, though admittedly not as quickly as he had before.

Abbi gathered her things up as well, stuffing it all in various pockets. She had a place for everything, even if she really didn't need to. She was moving at a much more leisurely pace, like she wasn't in a big hurry to be any were soon.

Edward caught her before her next class, tapping her shoulder gently.

She jumped slightly, but looked over at her shoulder. "Oh, um, hey! What's up?"

"The notes?" Edward reminded, quirking a faint smile.

She mentally smacked herself, and dug in her bag, pull out a slim binder. "They're all in there," She said, smiling. "Under the... Blue tab."

"Ah, thank you," Edward said easily. "I have a free period now, so I'll return them to you after?" he offered. He'd just copy the notes.

She nodded. "That's fine. I have Phys. Ed... So I'll be in the gymnasium..." The last word came out of her mouth awkwardly, and she frowned, hoping he understood.

Edward chuckled softly. "Alright," he said, slipping the binder with his other books, and then turning to head for the library.

She let him, heading in her own direction. She felt a bit stupid, but she wasn't going to let it show. Once she was there, she went about changing, and preparing herself for the class.

Edward didn't take much time copying the notes, and then set them neatly aside for Abbi. When the period was over, he waited outside of the locker room, until Abbi appeared.

Abbi came out after gym, sighing. Even though she was from England, it didn't mean she was good a weird sports like badminton and the like. In fact, until she came here, she'd never played it. She saw Edward as she was coming out of the locker room, and went over, smiling.

Edward looked up with a faint smile when he saw Abbi, and pulled the notes out. "Thank you. These were very helpful," he said once Abbi was close enough.

She nodded. "No problem. I'm glad you understood them, because there were times where I wasn't sure if I did or not," She responded, biting her cheek a little.

Edward chuckled softly. "They were very clear," he assured her as he held out the notes.

Abbi nodded again, and smiled. "Alright. Um, if there's anything else you need, feel free to ask."

Edward nodded softly. "Alright, thank you," he said politely, and then turned to head off to his last class.

She did the same, though, in all truth, she was ready to head home for the day. Gym always wore her out, even back home. She sighed, and made her way, hoping it would pass quickly.

It went by quickly enough, and soon everyone was headed for the parking lot, or ready to walk home. Most were close enough to walk back to where they lived, after all.

Abbi, being unaccustomed to the soggy Washington climate, had taken her car to school. It was a rather well used Honda, but she loved it all the same. The only problem she'd had was driving on the right side of the road, but now, she was used to it.

A/N:

Dark: There, the end of chapter one! I hope you enjoyed the beginning of our massive crack fic, and there will be more. The updating may be fairly sporadic, but we are attempting to get a majority of it up tonight, since we will only be updating when we get together. Thank you for reading, reviews are loved, but please be constructive if you have negative criticism.

Falling: Flames will be fed to our fire pit and make it bigger. XP And you DON'T want it to get bigger, because then more crack is produced.