Disclaimer: Fan made by fans for fans. I do not own these characters. Disney and Lucasfilm do. Please don't sue.
Summary: Leia Organa, Princess of Alderaan, Imperial and Galactic Senator, Leader of the Resistance, his mother, was dead.
A/N: Inspired by the beautiful fanart by morphinepudding found on tumblr: /post/169265447264/goodbye-mother-another-epix-reverse-speculation
Goodbye Mother
-x-x-x-x-
As if a soft breeze kissed the scar on his cheek before blowing out a candle, Kylo Ren felt her love for him in the Force, then felt it flicker and fade away. He staggered at the overwhelming loss of it.
The bridge commander that was giving Kylo the previous shift's report stopped and asked, "Supreme Leader, is everything all right?"
Anger and embarrassment at being caught in a weak moment flared within Kylo as he ignited his lightsaber and swung at the nearest console.
"LEAVE ME!" he screamed as he ran down the hall towards his quarters, the bright red blade slashing at everything in sight, leaving chaos and destruction in his wake. Once the door to his room closed shut behind him, Kylo dropped to the floor, the deactivated lightsaber clattering at his side as he tried and failed to prevent the traitorous tears from slipping down his cheeks.
Leia Organa, Princess of Alderaan, Imperial and Galactic Senator, Leader of the Resistance, his mother, was dead.
-x-x-x-x-
Rey winced at the pain in her chest, but it was the wave of sadness that brought a tear to her eye.
"Rey? What's wrong?" Finn asked as they stopped in front of the cafeteria.
"Nothing," she replied, scrubbing her eyes with the back of her hand. "I just suddenly felt sad, that's all."
"Are you sure?" Finn asked again, concern written all over his face. "I can take you to the medical bay, make sure you're not ill?"
"No, really, I'm fine," Rey said, managing a wan smile to her friend before entering the cafeteria for breakfast.
A couple of hours later, after chasing Poe Dameron down the halls to the medical bay, Rey finally discovered the cause and source of her earlier sorrow. Holding each other tight, Rey, Finn, and Poe cried and mourned the loss of their leader and friend, General Leia.
-x-x-x-x-
Opening the door to her room, Rey found herself staring at the ruins of Kylo's quarters instead, his few possessions broken and scattered around him.
"What do you want?" Kylo growled as he sat on the floor, glaring at the apparition before him.
"Ben," Rey said with a sigh. "I'm sorry about your mother. You should know she loved you, always. And never gave up on you. Not even at the end."
"My mother," Kylo spat out with disgust, "abandoned me as a child. She never loved me. She only loved her precious Republic." Coming to his feet with his hands curled into fists, Kylo once again used the Force to hurl his broken things into the wall. "And I'm going to enjoy destroying everything she loved."
"No, you won't," Rey replied, her voice soft and calm. "I can feel it, your love for her. The Light. You don't have to fight it." Stretching her hand out, she reached out to him through the Force, offering comfort, but Kylo turned his back to her and she was alone in her room once more, their connection broken.
-x-x-x-x-
Alderaan was gone and Naboo had fallen to the First Order. There was no place to lay General Leia Organa to rest.
It was difficult with the New Republic and Resistance in shreds, friends out of touch and resources almost gone, but Chewie still had a few contacts, and with Lando Calrissian's help, the few that could made their way to Endor.
There, under the same green trees and blue sky that Leia Organa and Han Solo had promised themselves to each other in marriage, C-3PO gave a summary of Leia and her life; of her accomplishments as a Princess, Rebel, General; of her goals, hopes, and dreams for the galaxy; of her strength, courage, and resilience during the war; of her love for her family, her friends, her people.
Rey stood with Finn and Poe, trying her best to hold back the tears, when she felt Kylo's hand slip into hers. Through the Force, they stood side by side, silent and still, until the ceremony was over. As everyone slowly filed past the flower-covered casket, saying their goodbyes, Rey and Kylo stayed behind, both wanting some privacy.
Turning to Rey as he began to leave, Finn asked, "Are you coming?"
"In a bit," she answered, her voice soft and low.
"We'll meet you at the Falcon," Finn said, giving her a brief hug before following Poe out of the clearing.
Materializing once they were finally alone, Kylo reassured Rey, "I'm not sending ships after you. Well," he shrugged, "not yet anyway."
"Thank you," Rey sighed, a sad smile on her face, grateful for the small reprieve. "How did you know that we were burying her today?"
"I didn't. The Force just... brought me here," Kylo said quietly.
"It knows," Rey said back just as quietly, not wanting to disturb the solemn atmosphere. "It knows you need this to calm your soul, to find your balance."
Moving to face him, Rey pulled Kylo close and wrapped her arms around him, placing her ear against his chest. Despite the light years distance between them, she could feel the warmth of his body through the Force; she could hear his heartbeat. Kylo responded in kind, pressing his cheek against the top of Rey's head.
"You never mourned your father, did you?" she asked.
"I can't," Kylo confessed, unable to keep Rey at arm's length anymore. "To mourn him would be to let in the Light."
"Ben," Rey said, stepping back to look up at him. "It's not about the Light or the Dark. It's about ending the conflict you feel and finding peace. It's about forgiving yourself." Cupping his cheek with her hand, she whispered, "Just as your father forgave you."
Kylo covered her hand with his own before pressing his forehead against Rey's. Closing their eyes, they let the Force flow between them, a balm to each other's souls.
"Go, mourn them both," Rey said as she broke away and nodded toward General Leia's resting place.
With soft, hesitant steps, Kylo made his way to the casket, trailing his hand along the smooth lid. His mother, though physically encased in the box beside him, was gone, peacefully in her sleep. His father, too, was gone, dead by his own lightsaber. On their last day together as a family, both of his parents had held him close, happy and hopeful that his training would turn out well, but with tears of sadness for his departure.
Much like that day, his love for Leia and Han bloomed in his chest, and his grief finally overcame him as he fell to his knees. For the first time in a long while, Kylo allowed himself to cry.
Placing her hand on his, Rey gave what comfort she could and grieved alongside him. She heard Kylo's murmured "Goodbye Mother" before he slowly faded away.