disclaimer:i dont own xmen and i never will as for the song well hilary duff owns it
dreamer:well now that i have said that i suppose i should get onto the story
logan:meaning the authoress if you can call her that has no clue
dreamer:*glares at logan*dont make me put you in the cage with mystique again
logan:grrr fine just write the damn story already*mumbles under breath
dreamer:ok good boy *trips over shoe and gets knocked out*
kitty:well like that was interesting so like just read and review it is totally her first do like be nice please=^^=
and the lyrics will have slash marks to seperate them from the storie ok.
______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
who said love was not weird as she sat there watching him joke around and flirt with tabitha.
it was hard not to wanna cry but she kept saying if only to herself if he is smiling then i will too but yet her dates with lance did not even bring the joy she hoped.
it was more like doing a job than being the guys girlfriend she kept on just slowly waiting but he only had eyes for tabitha and kitty knew this.
but if she just kept this up she was going to waste away so finally after having had enough of this depressing ,stuff she walked out of her room the next day with her head held high because katherine pryde
was not a weakling she was a girl no a woman she thought walking with confidence past kurt and tabitha barely glancing at them when kurt greeted her.
she just waved and kept walking evan was the first to notice that kitty seemed different but decided against saying anything as the days wore on it was becoming more and more strained on her.
she was trying to act happy and when scott sent jean to talk they went outside from prying ears or eye's sitting down she began asking before jean could even utter a word.
kitty: um jean have you like totally felt as though you could become invincible.
when your like with someone special i mean like i was not trying to suggest but im totaly confused.
i like dont know why but my heart hurts from thinking of kurt with tabitha like you know if i was to just not exist.
it was totally stupid just ignore it.
turing to get up and leave jean grabbed her hand forcing her to look back at her sighing
jean: kitty i dont know what to say but if i had to guess you got it bad your head over heels for kurt but from how your acting every ones worried about you.
but we know pushing you to tell us would not help you but if i had to give advice id say relax and be yourself ok if kurt has tabitha you have lance just be happy ok.
nodding she watched jean stand and head towards scott who was waving sighing she thought well thats so easy for you but not me.
slowly over the course of the month she began to feel more and more alone her and lance decided it was time to end it and just be friends.
finally spring break rolled around and kitty decided she need to leave talking to the professor she explained she just needed some away time so now here she was packing to head home.
she did not know if she wanted to stay home for good or what but it was better than staying where she felt like she was slowly dying from heartbreak.
blinking she tried so hard not to cry but the tears fell one by one softly hitting her clenched fist as she berated herself for being weak.
at that moment kurt had come to ask if he could borrow her science notes when he heard crying concerned for his best friend he bamfed into her room.
the moment kitty heard him she knew she needed to run just get outta there thinking only of running she fazed through the floor landing in the hallway below her room.
the moment she did she ran through doors and kept going soon though she became tired and collapsed in the wooded area about a mile and a half from the mansion.
sitting there she decided to not ever come back and as she felt the truth that kurt was in love with another she felt herself fall apart and she just couldn't keep the pieces together any longer.
slowly her facade of cheerful valley girl faded and left was her true feelings heartbreak bad time as she sobbed she felt so alone, the tears did not do her any good because if any they reminded her she was weak not strong and now she was running.
laughining bitterly at the thought she began to take a deep breath slowly the memories of the first meeting with kurt flashed through her mind how she feared him it.
all seem like a movie the time they spent together how they became close friends how she sought him out when she wanted a friend in her times that lance hurt her feelings.
all of it came threw her mind and with it more tears it reminded her of a song she once heard and how it fit them so perfectly.
\crash that was you and me/
how true that was her and kurt did crash so to speak of her heart fell for him when he would not give up on trying to be her friend .and smiling sadly she remembered how he was there to listen to fat lot of chance that did here she was running from her friends and him how sad she really was pathetic after all.
who knew it would become like this were she wanted dreams over reality how utterly stupid it was.
\started out so innocently shattered on the ground i hear the sound/
laughing a bitter sound even to her ears she thought ( yeah it did we were supposed to be best friends but now he has my whole heart body and soul and i am shattered because he has no need for me.
im alone how stupid that i fell for my best friend.)
closing her eyes she remembered everything his smile the jokes and how he could cheer anyone up and still be there for her shaking her head she slowly,leaned back to rest her weight on her arms letting the sunlight wash over her.
hoping that if there was a god then perhaps he could stop her from drowning in her heartaches by granting her a swift end.
\crash ringing in my ears i still feel the sting of my tears/
and she did because even though they stopped she felt those tears just like they were her very heart breaking and cracking in two with thought it was like her life was fading but she could not care with out him she was nothing her fears came back tenfold. and she felt like she was going to go insane just wishing for something not meant to be how dumb.
then she realized how she needed to be with him but he did not need her it seemed.
\someone wake me i cant seem to break free/
\go on get outta my head im on the wrong side of a parallel universe/
\am i alive or just dead i've been stumbling in the dark/
\living in a crash world/
walking out of the mansion he followed the path she had run not moments before logan and storm following because they were worried about kitty and needed to see if the girl was ok .stopping short of a clearing in the woods they saw her sitting down with tear stained cheeks looking more like a broken doll then her normal self. but when kurt went towards her storm stopped him and they just watched looking at her.
with the sun shining on her kurt thought she was a angel a broken angel that had never looked more beautiful then now with those blue eyes.
\hush dont say one more word at this point the truth seems absurd/
ause who we were is gone forever/
the three stood there till logan nudged storm and they walked off knowing this was something they had to let those two work out not them. walking away kurt never noticed they had left he was to interested in voice in the back of his mind was telling him that he would be late for his date with tabitha but he could not bring himself to leave kitty.
seeing her like this it made him feel bad knowing he could do nothing but just watch and hope she was gonna turn towards him just tell him she was ok. but he knew somehow she was hurt crushed and he did not know why but it was painful to see her acting so not herself.
it was like seeing her for the first time with a different view from how she always acted he knew her better then anyone, and knew she was sad but he said nothing in fear of losing their friendship it was so strained now that he was with tabitha.
but he just did not know what to do he had moved on or at least tried to but couldn't cause he was in love with kitty. and always would be it seemed like ages since he last saw her and this girl this sad heartbroken girl was not the kitty he knew and this alone made him even more saddened by it.
\underneath our fears everything is so twisted and weird/
yeah that was true because for crying out loud she was in love a guy who was fuzzy and blue with elf ears and a tail. he was like a god to her letting another tear slowly slip free she looked towards the clouds wishing she was not in love.
praying this would end and she would not hurt so much and the pain would stop and she could breathe. because if kurt had said to go disappear she might have laughing at that thought she turned once more to looking at the ground, where she sat just wishing to be held by him if only in her head.
but still sighing once more looking at the clouds slowly she began singing the words out loud
\someone save me i cant seem to break free/
\go on get outta my head im on the wrong side of a parallel universe/
\am i alive or just dead i've been stumbling in the dark living in a crash world/
at this she turned and met kurts eyes seeing him she was torn between wanting to run to him and run from him. why was love like this it was so utterly confusing to the point of insanity but yet so warm. she knew it was like saying you walked into heaven .she never got that but now she knew kurt was her small piece of heaven, the one she wanted to be with and not worry about anyone else.
\slow motion devastation shoulda seen it coming but i couldn't do nothing emotion desperation/
\some one save me i cant seem to break free/
it was true she thought she should have known that in the end kurt would have her whole heart and soul. and she felt sad to know this someone it was true she couldn't if she tried because her very being was his. she wouldn't be happy knowing that he was with another while she died inside looking right at him.
she blinked fresh tears falling but staring into those gold eyes she loved so much yet hated too sighing at the irony of it all she just wanted nothing more the to vanish she was desperate to be held by him. and her emotions they were confusing to the point of her breaking she was sure that she looked a mess, hiding in the woods like this.
but somehow not caring, it was as though she couldnt anymore but why? meanwhile kurt felt lost he saw that her heart was broken but why to his knowledge her and lance had become happy, but seeing this he thought( vhat iz wrong with keety she lookz zo lozt). he knew then that he couldnt say no he just wanted to be with her it hurt not being close to her as they were so use to being together. since the whole incident awhile back now.
but now he had no doubts he loved kitty and knew what had to be down lest the girl leave and take a part of him with her she was his laughter and his world now. and he realized without her he couldn't live anymore.
\go on get outta my head im on the wrong side of a parallel universe/
\am i alive or just dead i've been stumbling in the dark living in a crash world/
\go on get outta my head im on the wrong side of a parallel universe/
\am i alive or just dead i've been stumbling in the dark living in a crash world/
walking to her he asked: keety why did you not say a word? she smiles a bitter smile while thinking how she loved the way he said her name it made her melt yet feel special.
and she stared at those gold eyes while saying: i wanted you happy but my heart it hurts kurt why does it i feel like i cant breathe without i dont know why but i want to be near you but i know it will never ...
those words died instantly as he kissed her once pulling back he wiped her tears and told her: keety i will never hurt you i hadnt meant to atleazt, so please let me heal zat heart and kiss those tears away ok just let me love you.
sighing she let him hold her it just seemed so right to her as tabitha walked by and saw them kitty holding kurt as though he was her very own teddy bear and him looking as though if he let go she'd vanish.
tabitha laughed to herself and went off to find a new boyfriend because she knew they were meant to be just like it seemed kitty's last thought before kissing kurt was if this is heaven then im happy.
because this is where my heart is and my love the very reason for my life my fuzzy elf.
tabitha walked off but not before whispering to the wind heard by only her while smiling was a single thing it was just a random thought but, yet so true because it fit them to a tee now that was a scary thought she laughed at this. deciding if they were happy so be it she was 2
\am i alive or just dead i've been stumbling in the dark living in a crash world/.
*the end*
_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
dreamer:huh what'd i miss hey who ate my dorito kurt you better start running you damn elf wanna be
kurt:*laughs while hiding from authoress*i guess vat she meant vas to let her know it was a vood first attempt
kitty:*sigh*it seems that dreamer is like totally immature so like leave us some positive things ok i like need to go get her before they put another complaint on her lol
dreamer: what do you mean another it was one time ok and it was sooo their fault they ate my pizza i had no choice but to crash their car *sits down on floor pouting*stupid aliens eat my pizza will you and dumb lawyers causing me to admit i own nothing *grumbles*
dreamer:ok i hope i made it better meaning i fixed my horrid writing skills to what i hope it readable and understandable lol.
so please read and review comments and things are welcome because without flame a authoress cant improve but,great comments make me happy.
l8tr=^^=