Jareau: The Untold Story

by jareaufan

Crackfic. Jennifer Jareau is just an average FBI Agent who enjoys world domination, "bar hopping," igloos, hosting her own "light-hearted" hidden camera prank show, and not inviting her boss to pool parties. Her latest adventure? Wal-Mart door greeting.

1. Secret Mastermind

This story stemmed from a discussion on the Criminal Minds Wiki – JJ page. We JJ fans decided she needed more screentime. Blah blah blah. I think one of us is planning a full-on pitchfork-flaming torch army to get just that.

Anywho.

The lovely Bessie(underscore)Mae said this: "About JJ being in charge, they've described her as the den mother or gatekeeper in articles and commentary on the dvds. Someone online said she's the secret mastermind of the BAU."

Secret mastermind of the BAU you say? Hmph. That's something I can work with.

- TSS (who hasn't abandoned y'all)

It was a particularly tough day for Jennifer Jareau. The team had just gotten back from a case in Wyoming involving a signature which included the victims being painted pink. Sure, it was strange, but that's what they dealed with. The guy turned out to be a crazed escapee from the sanitarium, who thought that pigs would rule the world.

Pigs? Yup. That made her laugh when she found out. The exchange when a bit like this:

PRENTISS: So he thought his victims were albino pigs?

ROSSI: And he was restoring them of their natural color?

JJ: Seems that way.

(JJ then turned away and began laughing uncontrollably)

That was when the team wondered what exactly she did in her freetime. Did she hang out at home and watch crappy Lifetime movies? Go play Runescape with nerds at the Comic store? Stalk her favorite celebrity, then use her FBI status to say she was just following up on a threat that she had intercepted?

Now they were back at the bullpen, JJ in her office doing who-knows-what.

Hotch walked in. "We're all going to the bar in a bit? You gonna come?"

JJ shook her head and shuffled some files. "No can do. I've got some world domi-." She paused. "I've got some paperwork to do. You know follow-up?"

Hotch nodded. "I see. Hopefully you can come next time though."

JJ smiled. "I'll try. You know I practically run this place."

Hotch smiled his rare HotchSmile then left the room, shutting her away in her cozy little JareauBrand Hobbit Hole.

JJ looked back at her papers. Her grin widening a bit.

She then started laughing maniacly.

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