Chapter 1: The beginning of a new banshee free story that will involve Sam and Dean Winchester and a couple of very VERY fast things that go zoom, voom, bang, bash, and other noises that can make people jump very high or just go "nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah!"
Sam looked over at Dean in disgust as he finished singing along with Led Zeppelin's Stairway to Heaven. Dean grinned at him as the last notes of the song faded away. Sam just shook his head.
"What's your problem, Sam?" Dean asked as he turned off the stereo. "Stairway to Heaven is a classic." Sam just sighed.
"What ever man." Dean looked at him and turned on the radio to hear the opening notes of Fergie's Fergalicious. Dean looked disgusted and started to change the station.
"What are you doing man? I love this song." Sam said as the opening lyrics started. Dean just shook his head and rolled his eyes but it left it alone.
Listen up ya'll, Cuz this is it
The beat that I'm bangin' is de-li-cious
"This is fucking retarded." Dean mumbled under his breath.
"Shhh!
This is my favorite part of the song." Sam said as he started
singing along with the song. Dean sighed and reached in the back seat
of the car for some ear plugs. Fergalicious definition make
them boys go loco Fergalicious (so delicious)
They want my treasure so they get their
pleasures from my photo
You could see me, you can't squeeze me
I
ain't easy, I ain't sleazy
I got reasons why I tease 'em
Boys
just come and go like seasons
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was suspicious
All
that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses (mmmwwahhh)
That puts
them boys on rock, rock
And they be lining down the block just to
watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)
Dean
came up empty handed as Sam started dancing in his seat to the song.
Dean groaned, this was going to be a long night. He looked over at
Sam, he reminded him of a 7th grader at his first
dance. So delicious (It's hot, hot) Fergalicious
def-, Fergalicious def-, Fergalicious def- def fading echo
I'm Fergalicious (so delicious)
So delicious (I put
them boys on rock, rock)
So delicious (they wanna taste of what I
got)
I'm Fergalicious (t-t-t-t-t-tasty, tasty)
Fergalicious definition make them boys go crazy
They always
claim they know me
Comin' to me call me Stacy (Hey Stacy)
I'm
the F to the E, R, G the I the E
And can't no other lady put it
down like me
My body stay
vicious
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my
witness (oooh wee)
I put yo' boy on rock rock
And he be
lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres, two, uno)
"Alright…
I'm officially going to rip out that stereo if this song doesn't
end REALLY soon." Dean said as he gripped the steering wheel
harder. Sam ignored him and kept on singing, turning the volume up as
he did until the car was practically vibrating with the noise. So
delicious (It's hot, hot) Baby, baby, baby
T to the A to
the S T E Y girl you tasty, T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty
So delicious (I put them boys on rock,
rock)
So delicious (they wanna taste of what I got)
Fergalicious
(hold hold hold hold hold up, check it out)
If you really want me
Honey get some patience
Maybe then
you'll get a taste
I'll be tasty, tasty, I'll be laced with lacey
It's so tasty, tasty, It'll make you crazy
D to the E to the L I C I O U S, to the D to the E to the, to
the, to the, hit it Fergie
"Fergie?
What the hell kind of a name is Fergie?" Dean asked, but Sam didn't
hear him over the music blasting out of the speakers. All
the time I turn around brotha's gather round always looking at me up
and down looking at my Delicious
(So delicious)
(uuhh)
I just wanna say it now I ain't
tryin to round up drama little mama I don't wanna take your man
And
I know I'm comin off just a little bit conceited and I keep on
repeating how the boys wanna eat it
But I'm tryin' to tell, that
I can't be treated like clientele
Cuz' they say she
But I ain't promiscuous
And if you was
suspicious
All that shit is fictitious
I blow kisses
(mmmwwahhh)
That puts them boys on rock, rock
And they be
lining down the block just to watch what I got (got, got, got)
Four,
tres, two, uno
"Why
are they alternating languages?" Dean screamed as he felt his brain
cells exploding along with his eardrums. Sam continued to ignore Dean
as the song continued turning Dean's brain into jelly. My
body stay vicious It's so delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
I be up in the gym just working on my fitness
He's my witness (oooh wee)
I put yo' boy on rock rock
And
he be lining down the block just to watch what I got (four, tres,
two, uno)
So
delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
I'm Fergalicious, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t tasty, tasty
It's so
delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
So delicious (aye, aye, aye, aye)
I'm Fergalicious,
t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t (aye, aye, aye, aye)
"My
brain is melting in oblivion!!!!" Dean screamed as he pulled off to
the side of the road and covered his ears. Sam continued to sing
along with Fergie, completely unaware that Dean had pulled over to
the side of the road. T to the A, to the S T E Y girl you
tasty, T to the A to the
S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the S T E Y girl you tasty
T to the A,
to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the, to the, to
the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
To the D to the E to the L I C
I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to
the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the, to the, to
the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty
T to the A to the S T E Y girl you tasty,
T to the A, to the,
to the, to the, to the (four, tres, two, uno)
To the D to the E
to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to
the D to the E to the L I C I O U S,
to the D to the E to the, to
the, to the, to the, to the, to the...
As the last notes faded away Sam finally looked over at Dean, wondering why he was in the fetal position in his seat.
"Dean?" Sam asked as Dean finally unplugged his ears. "Why are we sitting on the side of the road? And why are you in a fetal position?"
Dean looked around him and sat up in his seat with a heavy sigh. "If you ever make me listen to that crap again I will personally tie and gag you in the back seat." Sam just laughed at him and turned the radio back on to hear the opening notes of Fergie's London Bridge. Dean screamed and dove for the stereo only to be hit from behind by Sam. Dean's vision swam and Sam tied him up and threw him in the back seat.
"Sorry Dean." Sam said as the song started up. He slid over into the driver's seat and pulled onto the road, singing along with Fergie.
Oh
shit (oh shit) (oh shit) (oh shit) Verse 1 All my girls get down on the
floor,
Are you ready for this?
Oh
shit (oh shit)
Ohhhhh
It's me, Fergie
The Pimp!
Polow!
Fergie Ferg, what's up, baby?
When I come
to the club, step aside.
Pop da seats, don't be hatin me in da
line.
V.I.P., 'cause you know I gotta shine.
I'm Fergie
Ferg, give me love you long time
Back to back, drop it down real low.
I'm such a
lady, but I'm dancing like a ho,
'Cause you know
I don't
give a fuck, so here we go!
Dean screamed something that sounded like, "I give a fuck if we listen to this crap!" through his gag as he started trying to kick Sam from behind.
How come
everytime you come around, BridgeAs the drinks
start pouring, Verse 2the Grey goose got your girl
feeling loose. And I'm like get
up out my face, (oh shit)
Chorus
How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge,
wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…
My London, London bridge, wanna go
down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London,
London, London, we goin' down like…
And my speech start slurring,
Everybody start
looking real good.
Now I'm wishin' that I didn't wear these
shoes. (I hate heels)
it's like er'ytime I get up on the dude,
Paparazzi put my business in the news.
'fo turn around and spray your ass with
mace, (oh shit)
My lips make you wanna have a taste. (oh shit)
You got that?
I got the bass.
Dean
screamed through his gag, but Sam just ignored him and kept on
driving singing along where he knew the words. Chorus
How come
everytime you come around, Bridge 2 Verse 1 All my girls get down on the floor, Chorus How come everytime you come around, Fuck you, bitches.
How come everytime you come around,
My London, London bridge,
wanna go down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin' down like…
My London, London bridge, wanna go
down like,
London, London, London, wanna go down like,
London,
London, London, we goin' down like…
Aah,
da, da, da, da, do, do, do, do
Me like a bullet type, you know
they comin' right
Fergie love em' long time
My girls support
right?
Aah, da, da, da, da, do, do, do, do
Me like a bullet
type you know they comin' right
Fergie love em' long time
My
girls support right?
When I come to the club,
step aside.
Pop a seats, don't be heavy on the line.
V.I.P.,
'cause you know I gotta shine.
I'm Fergie Ferg,give me love
you long time
Back to
back, drop it down real low.
I'm such a lady, but I'm dancing
like a ho,
'Cause you know
I don't give a fuck, so here
we go!
How come everytime you come around,
My
London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London,
London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin'
down like…
My
London, London bridge, wanna go down like,
London, London,
London, wanna go down like,
London, London, London, we goin'
down like…
As the last of the words faded away Sam stopped the car and looked around him. "Dean? Huh, I wonder where Dean went." Sam looked in the back seat and saw Dean bleeding in the back unconscious.