A/N Okayy this is my first DW fic, and yes it is just a bit of angsty drabble, It randomly just popped into my head and i have no idea how. Disclaimer: I dont own Doctor Who, but i do own a TARDIS money box! :D Oh and thanks to gleekfrak97 and shonamaryhadalittlelamb and the rest of my mates for putting up with my DW obsession! :L Mousey :) xxx
The Doctor stared on at River in shock, growing angrier by the minute, just as she was. He wasn't angry at her anymore, well he was… but for other reasons. No, he was angry at himself, because what River was saying was true, he was turning into a monster, he was turning into those he fought. He always knew he was selfish, it had affected him in his previous incarnation a lot more than it did in this one, but that niggling thought was still there. He was just a selfish old man. A selfish old man that loved danger and endangering others lives, even if it wasn't intentional, even if he did mean to, because he was just too selfish.
He fought monsters and warriors everyday, he rejected the use of others weapons, but not his own. He didn't reject his selfishness, and he didn't reject his carelessness. He came to planets, and he destroyed them, leaving the inhabitants to clean up after themselves, while he whisked his companions off on other potentially life threatening adventures. He was dangerous and risked the lives of others. He installed false hope in people, leading them to trust him and lull themselves into a false sense of security. He broke promises but they still though of him as a hero. Amy was a prime example of that. He would make another promise he wouldn't be able to keep, just so she would be happy and would still trust him. Only Rory and River really knew what he did to people, Rory had seen it and so had River. They still trusted him, but he knew they would never really think of him as the hero that Amy and so many others had, but they trusted him. Trusting him was the most dangerous thing anyone could ever do, the Doctor knew that, yet he never discouraged it, in fact he encouraged it. Putting his companions lives in danger again and again, all because they trusted him. It was wrong, he thought, but it didn't seem to bother him, well it did, but a lot less than it should do. He knew that there would be others, others that trusted him, others that blindly followed him on his adventures, but it didn't really bother him, not that much, because he was a monster, one that he'd fought not to be.
A/N Well, read and review... because i love people a whole lot more when they review! :D Mousey :) xxx