He didn't notice her there. Didn't notice that she had been staring at him. He turned slowly from the hospital bed where Lacey slept to look at the woman who made this happen. He knew it was her. The air smelled heavily of apples. She always smelled like apples.

"What do you want Regina? To mock my pain?" He asked, turning to see her leaning up against the door frame.

She walked to him, her high heels clicking across the floor.

"No." She said in a whisper. Her face...something was different about it. It didn't have that look that usually had. She didn't look like she wanted to cause him pain. His heart twisted in his chest at the sight of her. Anger built up inside of him.

"This isn't the way Regina!" He spat. Her eyes searched his. "This isn't the way to make me love you."

Regina placed a hand to her chest. Was her heart still beating? Because it felt as if it had stopped. All the blood drained from her face. "That's. this isn't. That's not why I did this Gold." She stammered.

He knew that it was. When he used to train her in magic, he saw the longing in her eyes. He knew that she wanted him to be hers, but it wasn't the pure love he had received from belle. It was pure, raw, desire.

"Why me Regina? Why not Jefferson? Anyone else but me."

She touched his cheek. There was no use pretending anymore. He could obviously tell how much she wanted him.

"Because they aren't you."

He turned away from her. Back to Belle. Regina's eyes flashed. She hated Belle. With a passion. Not as much as she hated Snow White, but this was a different kind if hate. Belle made her hate herself. What she was. She made her wish that she were pure and innocent. Not sinister and evil corrupted by magic taught to her by the very man she wanted most.

"Why?" He asked again. Squeezing her shoulder.

"Because you gave me a chance. When no one cared, you did. Even though it was purely to benefit yourself, I feel like some part of you actually cared for me. You turned me into what I am. And I love and despise you for it at the same time."

She took a shaky breath, trying to remain composed. "Was it just because of my mother that you spent so much time with me? For revenge?"

He smiled that impish grin. "Well yes and no." She could here Rumplestiltskin coming out in his voice. "I'm not going to say it was out of the kindness of my black twisted heart, but I'm not saying I didn't...enjoy our lessons together."

Regina moved closer to him. So close that their faces were inches apart.

"Kiss me." She whispered. But it wasn't a command. It was almost...a question.

He hated to admit it, but he was actually tempted. She was a beautiful woman. Gorgeous in ways that many women only wished that they could be.

"I can't." He whispered back.

She looked utterly destroyed. "Why not?"

In response he backed away from her and went to stand at Belle's side.

"I can't betray her again."

Memories flashed through her mind bringing forth such a reaction she almost crumpled to the floor. Somehow she remained strong and kept her composure. Her facade was all she had.

She walked up behind him and he turned around to face her.

"I know some part of you loved me. At least for a little while." She said, touching his cheek with her hand.

What was that in his eyes? Actual pain?

"Regina..." He whispered. "I'm so sorry. I don't love you. I never have."

He opened his arms and she fell into them. He held her close and she laid her head on his shoulder. He rested his head in her hair and breathed deeply the scent of apples. The last thing he thought before letting he go was, "Why did I lie?"