Title: You are my heaven on earth
Author: angelicmercy
Rating: soft R
Warnings: slash, wingporn love, mush and gush all over the place, happiness and no angst at all (okay maybe a little cause I can't help myself =D)
Summary: Cas is Dean's Heaven on Earth
A/N: Written for the Wingporn day that celebrates the year of my epic wingporn affair with my pal caz2y5. My muse is dead for awhile now so I'm ecstatic that I at least a bit of a muse to use . All the happy wishes for a year that I know that crazy porn addicted woman. It's been a blast and I wish us many more Wingporn days to celebrate! Lyrics used from Beyonce's song 'Ave Maria'
Sometimes love can come and pass you by,
While your busy making plans,
Suddenly hit you and then you realize,
It's out of your hands,
Baby you've got to understand.
You are my heaven on earth,
You are my last my first.
I hear this voice inside
The soft glide of his skin was perfect where it dipped and flowed over the muscles and bones beneath, soft and warm and silky at your touch. You know you want to touch it more than you should and you did try to fight it for so long, you tried to fight the temptation because you knew what the consequences would be. God however created humans as weak creatures that lust for the feel of flesh against flesh. You went through your life looking and wanting contact, but you couldn't settle anywhere because not one of those touches is perfect enough for you. Yet this patch of soft and slightly pale skin is perfect for you. The shade of the cerulean blue eyes is incredible as they burn back at you. Watch you with curiosity, something unfathomable and beyond your any imagination. So alive even when you feel like everything is dead and gone around you. When all sparks of life have faded away, you just look at those eyes and you see the jolt of life and power. It's something like you have never seen before and you have to stop and wonder whether you are looking in the moody and easily changeable seas of the Heavens. Sometimes calm and slowly stroking the sandy shores of the holy place or crazily angry and furious that make you fear you will get consumed and burned by them. They make you drown in them and you can't look away.
You gaze at the plane of the skin that bends like the sandy dune in the desert with those soft and lean edges that makes you want to press your lips against it. You smile happily and wonders when you became such a little girl that you gush over a simple thing as this was. But then you recall that nothing is ever simple with your lover. Was he your lover? He must be because his eyes burned with the bluest fire you have ever seen when he spoke your name. When you two danced the eternal dance of passion and love. Wanting nothing more than to keep him close forever. You want to claim that little part of heaven he brings along to yourself. You want to be so selfish to claim him and keep him no matter what the future you witnessed tells you. and it spoke of awful things. Where there is no heaven or hell, just the empty edges of an equally broken man who never touched heaven.
You are aware as you kiss him and make him mewl your name that you shouldn't be doing this. shouldn't be the one tempting him and probably tainting the only part of heaven that deserved to reside in that holy place. He sacrificed everything for you. Sacrificed his heaven and peace so he could help you and you know it. you fall asleep every night feeling guilty that you bask in the fact that you have him close. You feel selfish and crazy that you want to own him at his own sacrifice. But you rationalise it telling yourself you never had anything so you are entitled to at least have him. After everything you went through and sacrificed you fear to let him go.
Your hand raises and you glide it over the soft skin, the warmth of it flowing into you and making you feel whole. After everything done to you, after you felt nothing and wanted yourself to just stay numb, you got this perfection and you are touching it now. your fingertips glide over the silky dune and up over the top. Your gaze follows your hand and you watch as it comes to a stop at the crop of silky black hair, the darkness of it like the calm night sky that guards over the blue sea and the sandy dunes in the heavens you will never see. Because you are not worth of it so you touch this. Stroke it and hold it in the midst of your sleeping lover. You gaze at him fondly wondering when the great righteous man turned into such a poet and you figure it is because touching heaven has to leave you with some sort of a religious experience. And remembering the way the body twisted and arched beneath your hands like the sands of the dunes bend when the desert wind moves them around, you know it truly is touching heaven and having a religious experience.
But even more as the blue eyes burn at you like when the sea gets caught up in a wild storm. The hurricane of his emotions and the sensations he makes you feel is like being struck by lightning. You fear that you might get struck by lightning for touching heaven. It should be blasphemous. It shouldn't be allowed yet your lovers gives you that piece of heaven. You smile as the body stirs and moves against the sheets. Your eyes fall to the peaceful face of your own personal heaven. He gazes up at you, a serene smile on his lips and you know that you are not worthy of it. Your own soul tainted beyond repair yet every night, he touches you and repairs a piece of you. Takes you apart with his hands like a craftsman and you pray to God you never believed in that He doesn't take him away from you. Piece by piece you are almost whole again, filled with his love and heat and lust that you never thought would be possible. You scream his name as he moves and twists inside of you, whispering words of forgiveness in your ear. His wings sheltering you from everything as they wrap around your body. The ebony feathers stroking over your back as you try to bury yourself deeper in that perfect piece of your own heaven.
You don't know how could this be blasphemy as he looks up at you and turns around. Sliding his body closer to yours and you lean in to kiss at those perfect lips, tasting honey and sweet essence of beauty. You never thought you would be able to taste beauty, but now you know you will never be able to life without tasting it again and again. You smile happily at him and nuzzle at the strong jaw, moving your lips over the harsh stubble of his and basking at how good it feels. How you never felt as good as you do when you nuzzle at the bundle of feathers just between his shoulder blades. At the crossing of his two powerful wings. You lick and suck at the sweetness and you know those wings with those beautiful feathers taste like heaven would.
"A penny for your thoughts…" He asks with a gruff voice, the huskiness of it thanks to the sleep he took. You look at him fondly, feeling the heat and love start to make a hurricane inside of you. Making you want and need things you should never really have.
"You are more than I deserve." You say not with a frown, but with a smile. Because you know that even if you don't deserve it, you are free to take as long as you're offered.
"How do you even know what you deserve or not?" The question is rather philosophical and what exactly do you expect from someone like your lover?
"Good point, but I know one thing." You say and lean in to kiss the perfect lips so you can taste heaven once more before you have to go out and face hell. Before the hell breaks you apart and leaves you beyond repair. But you know, you will be once more repaired and put back together as perfect as you should be. "I don't deserve heaven…"
You kiss him like your own life depends on it and you taste more than heaven on his lips. You taste reality and hope that makes you weep with joy. You taste the words that he keeps repeating to you and you wish you will remember them when the sun comes up and you have to face hell.
I love you too, Dean.