The Best Medicine
"Did you ever want to marry my mom?"
Maddie surprises Deacon with this question in the middle of a guitar lesson, seemingly out of the blue. He had always tried to be honest with her, for as long as he'd known her, and even more so after learning she was his daughter. They both seemed to place the same value on the truth, and after everything they had struggled through in their new relationship over the past year, he didn't want to let her down.
Maddie can tell he is struggling to answer.
"Please don't tell me it's complicated," she gently scolds, smiling up at him from behind her guitar. She never feels as confident as when she has a guitar strapped over her shoulder. Deacon is the one person she feels understands that about her, and he knows that's when the tough questions come out.
Deacon grins but Maddie suddenly closes one eye and holds her head.
"What's wrong?" Deacon asks, concerned.
"I don't know," Maddie responds, suddenly looking scared.
Deacon watches her. She squints her eyes and hunches over.
"Maddie? Sweetie, are you okay?"
Suddenly her face turns pale. She looks panicked and tries to put her guitar down. Deacon leans in to assist with the guitar, just as Maddie leans away and throws up- directly on Deacon.
"Oh my God, I'm so sorry!" Maddie starts to cry, embarrassed, and obviously not feeling well.
"It's okay. I've dealt with worse." Deacon assures her calmly.
He quickly but gently puts her guitar down, pulls his flannel off and roughly wipes off his jeans and T-shirt as he guides Maddie to the bathroom, holding her hair and rubbing her back in circles, telling her in a soothing voice that she'll be okay.
"I can't see anything. Everything feels like it's closing in on me, and the tiles are moving up and down," she says, looking at the black and white floor tiles that appear to be dancing in front of her.
"Does your head hurt?"
She slowly nods and presses her fingertips above her right eyebrow. "Right here."
The movement causes her to throw up once more, before carefully sitting on the floor, her head leaning against the toilet bowl.
"I'm sorry I threw up on you," she tells Deacon, tears rolling down her face. Even though she is sick and in obvious pain, her father/daughter relationship with Deacon is still new and she is afraid of doing anything to anger or disappoint him.
"Sweetheart, I don't care about that," he says, putting the cold wash cloth on her forehead instead of cleaning off his pants and shirt as she was expecting him to do. "I just want to make sure you're alright."
"I really don't feel good," she says, scared. She moves away from the toilet into Deacon's arms, as he sits on the floor next to her, holding the cold compress on her head.
"Has this happened before," he asks.
She carefully shakes her head, before realizing the movement, any movement, was a mistake. "No," she says weakly.
"It might be a migraine."
"Aunt Tandy gets those," she sobs into his chest.
"Alright, let's take you into the other room so you can lie down." He helps her up and grabs the hand towel and trash can before helping her down the hall to his bedroom and closing the shades. "Hopefully the dark room will help," he says, kneeling down on the floor in front of her and softly brushing her hair out of her face.
"Thank you," she says quietly before quickly sitting up and reaching for the trash, sobbing and shaking.
"Deacon? Maddie?"
"We're back here, Ray," Deacon calls out.
Confused, Rayna walks back to Deacon's room, suddenly feeling angry as she sees Maddie throwing up. She's walked in on this situation before and feels a sense of déjà vu.
"What's going on?" she asks, alarmed. "Maddie, what's wrong?"
Deacon, preoccupied, misses Rayna's accusatory look. "I think she might have a migraine." He says calmly, his voice full of concern. He doesn't take his eyes away from Maddie, still rubbing her back and holding the trashcan for her.
He explains Maddie's symptoms to Rayna.
"Oh, those sound just like Tandy's. And I think she's due for her period, too." At that Deacon cringes, noticeably, and Maddie attempts to scold her mom but throws up again instead.
"What? I'm sorry! But they can be hormonal! And you get headaches too..." she says, looking at Deacon, her voice trailing off.
"Pretty sure mine aren't hormonal," Deacon mutters. "I'm going to go grab another bucket so I can clean this one out." He goes off in search of another bucket, choosing to focus on taking care of his little girl rather than on how fast she is growing up.
Rayna sits down with Maddie. "Sweet girl, I'm so sorry you don't feel well. It does sound like a migraine. I was hoping you wouldn't ever have to deal with these."
"It was so sudden and my eyes are all blurry. My head hurts so badly!" Maddie tells her, weakly.
"Do you think you'll be okay in the car?"
"No, mom, I don't want to move," Maddie says, sounding both desperate and determined to stay put.
"We've got Daphne's chorus concert…" Rayna says aloud, trying to figure out what to do, ignoring the obvious solution.
"Go ahead to the concert. She can stay here. I can call her doctor and look after her," Deacon informs her, walking into the room with a few more buckets and towels.
Rayna looks torn. Deacon motions to the hall.
"Look I know you're her mama and you don't want to leave her, but I've got this Ray. I can take care of her. You can come back after the concert if you'd like."
She looks at his shirt and jeans, still soiled, and reaches over to wipe it off with the damp wash cloth she's still holding, smiling a little at his "tired dad" appearance. "I guess you didn't miss out on your chance to get spit up on after all," she teases, not quite sure they are at that point yet. Quickly changing her tone she adds, "I know she's in good hands. I'm just her mama..." She reaches for Deacon's hand and gives it a squeeze. "I'll come back after the show."
...
Deacon spends the next couple of hours soothing Maddie, talking to her doctor, cleaning up and sitting with her as she slowly nibbles on a roll and sips water. Eventually her pain starts to subside, her vision clears and she curls up next to Deacon with a pillow on his lap as he gently strokes her hair and quietly hums a tune.
"So, did you ever want to marry my mom?" Maddie asks again. She'd been so quiet Deacon had thought she'd fallen asleep. But this time, he doesn't hesitate to answer her, having been considering the question for the last couple of hours, and the best way to respond to his daughter. He knew she didn't know the whole story of the night she was conceived, and he didn't have the heart to explain how his one and only proposal to Rayna had ended. At the same time, he didn't want to give her false hope about a future as family that he wasn't sure would ever come to fruition. Instead, he answered the best way he could.
"Sweetheart, there has never been a time when I didn't want to marry your mom."
When no more questions follow, he realizes she's fallen asleep. He sits on the bed for a while just watching her his daughter sleep, something he'd never had an opportunity to do before, and he realizes that sometimes the simplest answers really are the best, and that not everything has to be so complicated. Maddie didn't know or understand Rayna and Deacon's difficult past, and she didn't have to. All she wanted to know was whether her father had loved her mother, and that answer was the simplest one of all.
Rayna returns a few minutes later, letting herself in quietly, and making her way back to Deacon's room. Rayna leans against the bedroom door frame, watching them from the light of the hallway.
"She asleep?"
"Yeah, for just a few minutes. I think she's feeling a little bit better."
Rayna walks over and sits at the foot of the bed, below where Maddie is curled up in a ball, looking much more peaceful than she did earlier in the evening. Her arms are wrapped around the pillow on Deacon's lap, but her features are much more relaxed.
"I made an appointment with her doctor for tomorrow. I can take her if you can't make it. The nurse on call thought it was a migraine, too, but to bring her in for a check-up, just in case."
Rayna nods, seemingly deep in thought. Deacon isn't sure what she's thinking. He still isn't certain where he stands with her, if she trusts him with Maddie. He's still not sure she wants him in Maddie's life. While his confidence in his relationship with Maddie is growing, he is never sure whether Rayna accepts it. He's knows Teddy doesn't, but Teddy is not his concern.
"You're so good at this," Rayna finally says.
"At what?"
"At taking care of her. This…this whole situation. You've just jumped in, and created this relationship, with a teenager! You're…a good dad. I'm sorry if I gave you the impression that I expected anything less."
Deacon holds her eye contact for a while before saying anything, remembering his earlier thoughts, that sometimes the simplest answer is the best. "I don't want to miss anything else Ray, even the not so pretty stuff. If I can be here for her, in any way, I want to be able to do it," he says quietly, not wanting to disturb their daughter.
Rayna observes their current situation, all curled up on the bed together, soft light shining in from the hallway, just two parents, caring for their child together. This time when she smiles it reaches her eyes, radiating warmth.
"How was the show?" He finally asks.
"Adorable. Daphne had a solo," Rayna says proudly.
"Did you record it?"
"I did," she drawls, her eyes still shining brightly.
Deacon gently slides Maddie and her pillow on to the bed, careful not to disturb her, and he and Rayna walk to the living room as she hands him her phone.
He leans against the kitchen counter, watching Daphne belt out "Kiss the Girl."
"It's from The Little Mermaid. It's a Disney movie," Rayna tells him.
"She is her mama's girl, for sure!" He beams at her.
Rayna smiles proudly. "Have you eaten? I'm actually starvin'. Why don't I whip us up somethin'. It looks like Maddie's gonna be here a while."
Deacon raises one eyebrow and looks at her. "I'm not THAT hungry, Ray. Why don't I make us something?" He walks over to the refrigerator and pulls out a package of pasta.
"I didn't want to be too presumptuous," she flirts.
"Is that so?" Deacon grins back at her.
They spend the rest of the night talking on the sofa, quietly catching up, eventually embracing both the moment and each other, enjoying the simple pleasures of a quiet night at home.