Hey, thought I'd dip my toes in the Glee fan fiction pool. I usually wade around in the Victorious fan fiction pool, but any pool's worth trying once, right?
Okay, enough pool metaphors. Just read this brotherly Furt which is possibly the first of a drabble series, because Furt is amazing and really fun to write, and tell me what you think.
As Finn Hudson fiddles with the sleeve of the letterman jacket that his mom was able to get all of the slushie stains out of, he looks over at the chipper young man in the drivers seat of the vehicle.
If one knew Kurt Hummel, one would describe him as sassy, passionate, fashion-forward and- dare they say it- bitchy. Chipper would not necessarily be the first word to pop in one's head when pondering about the boy with perfectly coiffed hair.
Kurt, who always insists on driving them home from school, since it is his car after all, turns onto Maplethorn Drive, humming as he does so. It is a light, care-free tune, most likely from some broadway show Finn has probably never even heard of.
Wait, he thinks he knows this one. Maybe it's the one from that show with all the cats or the one with that guy who was fiddling on a roof or that one about that witch from the Wizard of Oz that Kurt and Rachel always gush about or-
Finn stops thinking for a second (it wasn't difficult for him to do). How does a quarterback know about all these musicals?
Glee club, man. It does stuff to a guy.
And as previously mentioned, dating one Broadway fan and living with another sort of helps.
But as Kurt makes another turn onto a different street with some equally cheesy attempt at a picturesque name (Deer Creek Lane or Cloverbrook Park or some nonsense like that... Finn can't remember all these street names, he just knows which turns to make) and starts humming along to a Ke$ha song that pops up on the radio that is quietly playing to fill the one sidedly awkward silence, Finn knows something is up.
Kurt likes a lot of girly music that Finn will never particularly like or get, but Ke$ha is not on the fair skinned boy's playlist. "A talentless gutter child with an auto tuner and an industrial sized tub of body glitter," Kurt has been known to call her. "Her music makes me want to flush my ears out with acid and then clean them with a cotton swab covered in broken glass and rusty nails."
He's not what you would call a fan.
So why isn't Kurt demanding that Finn either turn the radio off or hand him a container of acid that he most likely doesn't possess?
Because of Blaine Warbler's recent enrollment into William McKinley High School and newfound membership of the New Directions, that's why.
"So... Blaine's at McKinley now, huh?" Finn finally decides to talk, since Kurt is too busy humming and being uncharacteristically giddy to start any form of conversation.
Kurt casts him a sideways glance, as if he hasn't even realized that Finn is in the car with him. But he still (mostly) keeps his eyes on the road, because he is a good driver and would prefer to not run into a brick wall. Instead of putting his king of snark crown on and saying, "No, Finn, his twin brother with the same name is" or something along those lines, Kurt smiles and practically squeals, "Why, yes. Yes, he is. Isn't it wonderful?"
Finn has never seen Kurt so happy. And Finn wants Kurt to be happy, any good stepbrother would, but it's... strange.
But in a good way, he thinks. Like, in a way where seeing badass Puck read to blind children would be weird but good.
"Yeah, it's great." Finn was hesitant at first, since Blaine has been known to steal the show while the rest of the Warblers do-whop behind him, but he seems like an okay guy, and he makes Kurt happy...
Speaking of which- "Look, Kurt, I'm glad there's, y'know, another gay kid at school for you to talk to... A-And that he's your boyfriend and all, but uh..."
God, saying what he wants to say is harder than he thought it would be.
"Okay, if you and Blaine are anything like the rest of us Glee couples, you're probably going to want to... y'know, make out with each other in front of your lockers... And stuff. And, um, touch each other in... certain places."
The joy has been swept from Kurt's face and is replaced with one of absolute horror. Good thing he's pulled into the driveway at this point, or he really might have crashed into a brick wall. "Oh dear God, no. You are not trying to give me The Talk."
Finn almost chokes on his own saliva. "What? No! I just, um, oh Grilled Cheesus, this is turning out way more awkward than I thought it would."
Kurt pulls his messenger bag from the backseat, glancing at Finn as he wrung his hands while doing so. "What point were you trying to make, then?"
"Uh, look, I just... Try not to make out in front of me, okay?" Finn thinks that might offend him a bit, so he adds, "You know I don't have a problem with it, it's just... You're my brother, okay? And I know we haven't been brothers for, like, our entire lives, but I really do care about you. And I can't help but feel... protective, I guess." Finn looks down at his lap and pokes his finger through one of the frayed holes in his jeans to avoid eye contact with Kurt. This is hard enough for him already. "And brothers who are concerned about the fact that their brother's love life might get, uh, out of hand, they don't enjoy seeing that kind of stuff. And it's just... You don't want to see your brother doing... stuff with someone, y'know? It's almost as awkward as this conversation."
Discomfort is still clear on Kurt's face, but his eyes shine with appreciation for what the quarterback just told him. He knows it's hard for Finn to talk about stuff like that, so he's delighted by the fact that he at least has the cajones to say that he cares.
"Well then... Thank you. I shall try to contain myself." He was planning on it anyway. He and Blaine are not much of a make out couple, as Kurt is still extremely uncomfortable when it comes to getting too sexual and he thinks excessively slobbering all over people is gross anyway, but it's fun to see Finn act like this.
Both teenage boys slide out of the car and as they walk up to the front door, Kurt presses the lock button over his shoulder. After unlocking the front door, Kurt shuffles in, Finn right behind him, and before Finn can tell Kurt he'll be in his room, playing a violent video game of some sort, the smaller boy calls out to him, "Oh, and I hope you realize the same goes for you."
Finn pauses before he can reach the first step and spins around. "What do you mean?"
"I would really appreciate it if you didn't try to devour Rachel's face if there's a chance I'm within a thousand miles of you," Kurt simply states, strolling into the kitchen to make himself some warm, soothing tea. Finn follows. "After all, you just said that a brother doesn't want to see his brother making out with someone, right?" After the tea pot is filled and he places it on the stove, Kurt spins on his heel to give his brother a smug little smile. Finn definitely isn't smiling back.
"But... B-but she tastes like vanilla lip gloss..."
"Then you'll just have to put some on your own lips." As steam bursts out of the stout of the pot, Kurt plucks a few tea bags from the drawer where various teas and coffees were kept in the Hudmel household. "Disgust at your sibling's public displays of affection is a two way street."
... Why Kurt always insists on using words with more than four letters, Finn will never know.
"... I liked you better when you were humming Ke$ha."
Boiling hot water was poured into two dainty teacups before Kurt tells him, "And that tidbit of information never leaves this room, got it?"
Kurt plops the tea bags in and hands Finn one of the teacups, the other grasped in his free hand. Finn has never had tea before...
And he's glad he hasn't, because it tastes like dirty sock water.
When he notices his disgusted face, Kurt rolls his eyes and goes to get some honey.
Finn is a pain in the ass sometimes.
But Kurt quickly realizes that all brothers are like that sometimes.
And hey, for the most part, Finn's a great guy.
Y'know, for a pain in the ass.