Can't Stop Myself (From Wanting You)
One-shot

Clary was sitting, perched on the edge of Isabelle's bed. Her palms felt sweaty, her throat dry as she waits for the older girl to arrive.

She hasn't seen her since the Clave released her, and Clary can feel her nerves like sharp tendrils of electricity.

Part of her isn't even sure if it's a good idea to be in here, what if Isabelle gets angry at Clary for being in her bedroom? Or worse, what if Isabelle hates her after what's happened. She's part of the reason Isabelle was on trial in the first place. The thought makes her sick.

Before she can talk herself into leaving, Isabelle appears in the doorway. If she's startled to see Clary sitting there she doesn't show up.

The first thing that strikes Clary is how beautiful the other girl looks. Her long, dark hair falling over her shoulders, a tight black top and leather pants hugging the girl's ample curves. She swallows hard.

Clary's always liked Isabelle, admired her really, and maybe there was something else too, something she didn't want to examine to close. But she likes this Isabelle the best. The one who isn't afraid to be herself, who doesn't feel the need to conform to her parents wishes, who doesn't give a damn what anyone thinks of her.

Fleetingly, she thinks this is her Isabelle. But feels herself blush at the thought.

In the moment she takes to think all of this, Isabelle has moved closer. She sits on the bed next to Clary, who looks up into dark eyes and feels like she's drowning.

"I was kind of hoping you'd come find me."

It's not what Clary expects her to say. Before she can think words are pouring out of her mouth.

"God Izzy, I'm so sorry. I never wanted any of this for you, I was so foolish and selfish and I could've gotten you exiled... I understand if you hate me, but I had to see you, I had to make sure, for myself, that you're okay."

Isabelle eyes her curiously for a moment then reaches over and takes a small, pale hand dragging it into her lap.

"I don't hate you, I could never hate you. And I don't blame you either. You were trying to save your mother and I was trying to save Meliorn. We did what we had to do. Besides it worked out, I'm here aren't I?"

She squeezes Clary's hand and begins idly playing with her fingers.

Clary looks down at their intertwined hands. She lets out a sigh she didn't even know she was holding.

When she meets Isabelle's eyes again, that same sensation washes over her. She feels like she's drowning in the dark depths of the other girl's eyes; and if she's drowning, she never wants to be rescued.

With a tremendous effort she pulls her gaze away from those piercing eyes, hungrily roaming the older girl's face, a sudden desire coursing though her. She wants to stare at Isabelle, wants to drink in everything about her, wants to commit her features to memory.

She must have an odd expression on her face because Isabelle brings her other hand up and strokes Clary's cheek with a small chuckle.

"You're staring."

Clary looks away cheeks burning a deep red. But she doesn't deny the words.

Isabelle uses her hand to guide Clary's face back up to her own.

"I don't mind you know."

Clary sighs again.

"I just, there was a time when I wondered if I'd ever see your face again. I didn't know if I'd get lost in the alternate reality or if you'd be exiled and I'd never see you. Now, I feel like I can't stop looking at you..."

Her words are quiet, nervous and shy, unsure how the other girl will respond.

"I can't stop looking at you either, but somehow I'm not sure you've noticed. There's something about you though."

Clary does meet her gaze this time. And she sees something in Isabelle's eyes.

"But why would you want to look at me? Me of all people?"

Isabelle scoots in closer, placing one hand on Clary's thigh, the other on the back of her neck.

Clary feels her breath catch in her chest. She's never felt her body respond to anyone except Jace like this. But he's her brother and she can't have him. But she can have Isabelle.

"I could never not look at you Clary. You're so beautiful and so brave. There isn't a person with alive that wouldn't want to look at you..."

She looks up into Isabelle's face through dark lashes and involuntarily bites her lip. Her eyes drift down to the other girl's full lips and her heart is racing faster than she can ever remember. She looks back up into smouldering dark eyes. Isabelle threads her fingers through red curls at the base of her neck, and tugs lightly.

"Clary." She shivers at the sound of her name on Izzy's lips. "You don't even realise how tempting you are... I don't think I can resist much longer."

Clary gives her a little grin, "Then just kiss me already."

Isabelle does. And it's everything Clary imagined kissing Isabelle would be. She isn't gentle, isn't careful, doesn't treat her like she'll break. The kiss is hot and intense. She gasps when Isabelle demands entrance into her mouth. Their tongues move together with feverish abandon. It feels like Isabelle is consuming her.

Clary moves impossibly closer, angling their bodies so they are pressed tightly together.

Isabelle grasps her waist, pulls tighter. She uses her teeth to nip at Clary's bottom lip, the smaller girl groans. She doesn't even understand what is happening to her. Before Isabelle, she'd never even been attracted to girls, and now, she desperately wants more.

Shifting again, Clary climbs into the dark haired girl's lap, straddling her without ever breaking their kiss.

This time it's Isabelle who moans. Low and throaty, and Clary tells herself, right then and there that she'll do anything to hear that sound again.

Breaking the kiss gasping for air they stare into each other's eyes, both pairs wide and full of desire.

Experimentally Clary grinds herself down into the other girl's lap, a surge of power shooting through her when Isabelle tosses her head back and lets out another moan of pleasure.

She takes the opportunity to kiss, lick and suck at the tender skin of Isabelle's throat.

The dark haired girl is losing control, usually she is the one torturing and teasing but Clary will be her undoing.

She tugs at red curls again until their mouths find their way back together, hips still grinding, hands roaming.

After a few more moments Clary breaks away, panting.

"I want you so bad Izzy, but maybe we should close the door first?"

Isabelle's eyes widen as she looks at her bedroom door which is wide open.

She groans and Clary giggles, before rolling off of her to lay on her back on the bed.

Grudgingly Isabelle gets up and moves to close the door. She can't stop herself from glancing back at the redhead.

Her clothes are dishevelled, her red hair a mess of curls on the pillows. She's biting her bottom lip again, its red and swollen and oh so inviting. Clary's green eyes are hooded and dark, and they're trained on Isabelle, beckoning her.

She slams the door shut and is back on the bed in seconds covering the redhead's body with her own.

"Now where were we?" Clary says in a breathy voice.

Isabelle doesn't hesitate to remind her.