TheRealEvanSG here with a quick message! So I was just sitting in school one day when this fanfic idea came to me. What if a guy from our world fell into the world of One Piece, and what if he was a demigod? Then I thought... nah, too cliche. So then I decided, what if that happened, but when he goes there, something's wrong: Luffy's a freakin' hawt GIRL?! I've always liked the idea of a girl Luffy, but I've never really had a good plot line for a story containing something like that. Well, now I do!

UPDATE: Please note that this is the edited, refined, and improved version of Chapter 1. I had caught a few noticeable mistakes I'd made when I first wrote this chapter, and I went back and fixed them. I will try to do the same with all the other chapters.

Damon: Yeah, yeah, on to the story all ready, baka. You're boring the audience.

GIRL LOOK AT DAT BODEH!

Damon: ...You gay, bro?

No! Just listenin' to Sexy and I Know It.

Damon: ...

Um, yeah, anyway, I do not own One Piece, nor do I own any characters in this story except for any original ones you see. And while we're on the subject of characters, please give me ideas for bad guys! Try to make 'em crazy 'cause most of the bad guys in the original canon are crazy.

Chapter 1 start!

Aeso, Demon or God?

Welcome to One Piece!

You know how in horror movies, oftentimes there's a character running into a dark alleyway at night, chased by some maniacal killer dude, when really they should've just stayed in the main city, where it's crowded and safer? Well, obviously I should pay more attention to horror movies, because that's exactly what was happening to me late one night in August.

I'd been running from him for about half an hour now, lugging my black, wheeled suitcase behind me, totally freaking out because I could feel evil in the air. Or maybe that was just my nerves. I didn't know and my brain wasn't working enough to care. All my brain cells where concentrated on one thought process: Get away from creepy thing behind me.

My legs ached. I looked back, wondering if I'd lost him.

Nope. The demonic figure was still there, bat-like wings spread frighteningly, poking through his black and red cape that fluttered in the slight summer breeze. His evil, glowing red eyes stared deep into the heart of my soul, and a deadly scythe hung sheathed on a belt at his side. He was tall, about seven foot by my estimate, which shouldn't even be possible. His shoulders were broad and his body was rippled with firm muscles, making him very intimidating. He wore a navy blue shirt with jeans that, on anyone else, would've looked normal, but on him just looked weird. He was strolling casually through the alley, like he owned the entire city and had all night to do this, but the expression on his face was one of slight annoyance.

I squeaked bravely and tried to run faster. This guy was a demon, a monster straight out of Hell, and he wanted me dead.

My future looked so very bright.

As I ran, I thought of something and mentally slapped myself. I was a Christian, and a hardcore Christian at that. I never even say "Oh my God" unless it's part of a prayer. So if I pray to God now, he'll save me from this demon, right? I clasped my hands together and thought a quick prayer. I would've said it, but I was too out of breath from running. Dear God, I've always tried to follow your laws to the T. I've never hurt anyone unless they were hurting someone I cared about, or were beating up innocent people on the streets. I've always tried to go to church on Sundays, and when I couldn't make it, I held a mass by myself. I never took anything from anyone except when freely given. So please, save me from this demon guy, or whatever he is!

Nothing happened. I wasn't sure what I was expecting; maybe a gust of wind that would blow the demon back to Hell, or possibly a bolt of lightning frying him to evil ashes, or maybe a flash of light teleporting me somewhere he couldn't find me. But I certainly wasn't expecting nothing. In fact, if anything, the demon just got closer. I had played my final card, and it had turned out to be a dud.

At the realization that I was all alone, I lost all strength to run and just collapsed in the alley. My legs burned with pain from running so far and so fast. My hand was clutching at my suitcase like it was a lifeline. I was out of energy. My breath came in ragged, pained gasps. Adrenaline pumped through my body, not helping to calm me down at all.

I seriously hoped this was all some crazy dream I was having.

I was curled up in a ball, back turned from the monster and face inches away from the alleyway street. A demonic shadow crept over me, filling me with a deathly cold feeling. There was an ear-rattling scrape of metal-on-metal, and a long pole with a wickedly sharp, curved edge was added to the shadow. My blood turned to ice, and I slowly turned around, dreading what I would see.

Sure enough, the demon was standing over me, eye twitching a little, spinning his scythe hand-over-hand. Evil radiated off of him. He was a heat lamp from the Underworld.

I decided right then and there that I hated heat lamps.

"Ah, finally." the demon rasped. "Why didn't you just stay in one place? I'm here to give you a new life, to grant your wish from earlier today. Plus, Vio said that you're the only one for the job, and if you stay like this, the world will end, so granting your wish is like an added bonus."

I stared. Fear was restricting my brain from working properly, but his words were... really weird. "Er, sorry, d-did you say you're g-going to g-give me a new l-life?"

That sounded dangerous. Did he want me to become his demon apprentice or something? Seeing as I was a hardcore Christian, that didn't seem likely, but who knew?

"Well, duh. I mean, what did you think I was here to do? Kill you or something?" He laughed so hard that I couldn't help feeling a bit stupid.

I frowned. "W-well, actually... yeah." I admitted sheepishly. I didn't trust him at all, but if he wasn't here to kill me... a flicker of hope burned in the back of my mind. "Uh... wh-who's Vio? Whaddya mean I-I'm the only o-one for the j-job? What job?"

"Ah, yes, straight to business." The demon nodded in approval. "First of all, my name's Aeso, and I'm god of the ocean and creativity. You're my son, so you're a demigod who can control water, breathe underwater, and negate most Devil Fruit powers. Besides that, anything you dream from this point on has the potential to become reality. Oh, and Vio's the goddess of fortune and fate."

I stared. "You're a god."

"That I am."

"A god."

"Yep."

"But there's only one God, and that's God. So... you can't be a god." My disbelief was what was causing me not to stutter.

The demon smiled. "Your faith will do you much good when you need it most, child, but I am a god. I'm not holy or deserving of worship like the God, no, but I'm a god all the same. Born out of His thoughts, my brothers and sisters and I are even closer genetically to Him then His angels and you humans."

"...Even other gods believe in God?" I deadpanned. "That's... crazy. How do you even expect me to believe you? You're a freakin' DEMON!"

Aeso - - the demon - - the god - - ah, whatever the Hell you wanna call him, glared at me. "I AM NOT A DEMON!" he bellowed in exasperation. "Why do people always think that when they first see me?!"

"It might have s-something to do w-with the f-fact that you've g-got bat wings, a s-scythe, and g-glowing red eyes," I said as sarcastically as I could. Damn. My stutter was returning because of him flipping like that.

"Curse my appearance," Aeso sighed, eye twitching a little. "I was born with all the ugly features of my family. Not even the REAL demons look like this, and I only have enough power to hold a purely human form for a few hours!"

Something else he'd said clicked. "And... hold it, did you say I'm your son?!"

"Well, yes," he agreed. "You are my son, Damon Daniel Digger."

A tic mark pulsed at the back of my head at this. I hated my name. Damon wasn't so bad, kinda cool actually, but all three words put together was very irking. Honestly, what where my parents thinking, naming me that? No, wait, not parents, parent. My mom, to be exact. My birth dad had no say in my name because just after I was born, he went out to the ocean and got lost at sea. At least, that's the story my mother told me. It sounded like something out of a shitty Percy Jackson book.

Wait.

Lost at sea.

Aeso said he was the god of the ocean and creativity.

The little part of my brain that was still sane put the pieces together. "Hell no," I gulped.

"Hell yes. I am actually quite handsome. Er, in my human form, that is. Anyway, Damon, yes, basically you are a demigod and you're also the direct grandson of the God. As for what the quest is... you'll find that out once you get there."

"No way. I'm not trusting anything a demon says," I said, shoving a worm of doubt that had snaked into my thoughts to the back of my mind.

Aeso sighed. "Very well. I suppose I'll have to prove it to you by sending you to the Luffyverse now... I suppose explanations will have to wait until later." He frowned thoughtfully. "It's really too bad I don't have any Mindphones at the moment... Ah, well. Here goes nothing... Please save the world, by way. It'd be very bad for everybody if you fail."

"Save the world? What - -"

I never got the chance to finish.

Instead, colors flooded my vision. I got this major headache, like the biggest headache in the history of headaches, and as the pain built in my head, I faintly heard Aeso say, "I'll be seein' ya around, buddy. Don't get too hurt."

And then I passed out.

Lame.

When I came to, I still had the headache, and for a scary moment, I couldn't remember anything. I couldn't remember who I was, or where I was from. I couldn't remember whether I was a boy or a girl, and I couldn't remember how old I was. My memory was a total blank.

And then my headache cleared and my memories flooded back.

Yes, that's right. I was Damon Daniel Digger, from the streets of New York, New York, or the Big Apple, or whatever the Hell you wanted to call it. My mom, a single, divorced woman by the name of June, had been murdered in our small apartment, and when I came home from class that day in my Sophomore year of high school to find her corpse lying mangled on her bed, I'd freaked out, grabbed a few necessary survival items and forced them into my suitcase (namely, two week's worth of clothes, toiletries, my iPod, my laptop, the corresponding chargers for them, and the $100 I'd been saving), called the cops, and ran from home.

Why'd I run away when all it did was land me as the top suspect in my mother's murder until the real killer was caught by total accident?

Simple. After all the reading and anime-watching I'd done (yeah, I was kind of an otaku), I'd learned that orphanages were equivalent to Hell for kids. And since I didn't have any other family except for mom, who was now dead (curse Dad for getting lost at sea!), an orphanage was exactly where I was headed. I was not going to let that happen, not for the life of me.

And so started my life as a street delinquent.

Somehow I managed to hold my own on the streets. I learned to fight under the instruction of a middle-aged homeless guy called Cracked-Up Kane, which was due to the fact that he was never seen without - - yep, you guessed it - - crack. Despite the fact that he was constantly high, he was actually a very nice guy, and willing to do whatever it took to help a friend.

The day Cracked-Up Kane and I first met was a hot day in my first summer. Summer had started not too long after my mom's murder, and I was starving, scavenging food from garbage cans. I know. It was about as fun as it sounded, which wasn't fun at all. But somehow I was still alive, and by avoiding the police, I managed not to get sent to 1) jail for questioning on my mom's death or 2) the orphanage. Anyway, I was little more than skin-and-bones, sitting on the sidewalk with one hand on my suitcase, looking hopefully up at the passersby, wondering if someone would be kind enough to spare a few dollars, which would be more than enough to buy a meal at McDonald's.

Sure, there was kind of a manhunt going on for me, but most people had only seen my face for a few minutes on TV, and said face had already become very different due to starvation.

But instead of nice citygoers, I got angry thugs.

These guys where a group of three school kids I'd beaten up the week before, back when I still had the strength to beat people up. They'd been picking on an innocent girl, and I never liked guys who tried to... do what they were doing to her. So I handed their asses to them on a silver platter and walked away, leaving the girl to wonder who the Hell I was and the guys to collect dust on the streets.

"Hey, you bastard!" the lead guy growled. He wore your typical gangster get-up: Baggy pants, black coat, white shirt, backwards cap - - you know the drill. The two behind him were dressed similarly, plus shades and minus the cap.

They looked like total idiots.

"This is payback for last week, punk!" Ugly Number One, the guy on the left, drawled.

"Yeah, man, we won't let you get away with what you did to us," Ugly Number Three, the guy on the right, slurred.

"Prepare for a major ass-beatin'!" Ugly Number Two, the ringleader, rumbled. A sadistic glint sparked in his eye and I glared up at him.

"Oh, so you make yourselves feel better by beating up the weak and those unable to fight back?" I hissed, oozing venom. Man did I hate people like that. "Hell's got a special place for you three."

"Leave him alone, punks," a voice behind the lamppost I was sitting against said.

I turned in surprise. "Who are you?"

"C-C-C-Cracked-Up Kane!" one of the thugs gulped.

"I heard he's crazy."

"He's got a freakin' black belt in karate, jujitsu, and tae kwon do!"

"Let's get out of here!"

And with that, I never saw them again.

Anyway, immediately upon waking up and regaining my memories, I noticed that the room I was in was unlike anything I was used to. For one thing, the bed felt über-comfy, though that might've been because I hadn't slept on a proper bed for about two years. Also, the entire place rocked. Which made me feel like throwing up.

When I opened my eyes after the initial sick-in-my-stomach feeling passed (which probably took a good hour), I noticed the last weird thing about my room. It had a single window which wasn't actually a window; it was a porthole. Like on an old-time ship. A porthole. And it overlooked the freakin' ocean!

"WHY AM I ON A SHIP?!" I bellowed in shock, my eyes popping out of my head comically.

I could tell it was nighttime because the stars where showing outside, and a single oil lamp burned on a table behind me, so I must not have been out for too long. Thought that was weird, too. As a result of major air pollution, I had never seen stars before. Just looking at the stars felt like a dream come true. They were so pretty, and there were so many... it blew my mind. Seeing stars on a screen and seeing them in real life was nothing alike.

Great. Now I sound like a sappy girl.

I was brought out of my thoughts with the sound of the opening of a door.

I looked in that direction and blinked. The person who had just came into the room with me was a somewhat familiar, very cute redheaded girl with... with gigantic melons that served as her chest. Normally that would just look ugly on a girl, but this one's chest only made her look hotter. I blushed a little. Then I beat myself up internally for being a pervert.

"Who are you?" I asked.

"My name's Nami," she said with a warm smile. "Who are you?"

"Damon, Digger D. Damon," I said. I wasn't sure why I'd put my last name first, or changed my middle name to the initial D., but whatever I said made her blink.

"Oh, really? You've got the middle initial D. like my captain, huh?" Nami asked curiously. "Huh..."

"Yeah, I do," I nodded. "Who's your captain?"

Her answer made my jaw drop.

"Monkey D. Lucy."

No way, no way, no way... I stared at her, eyes wide and my jaw so low it was touching the floor. Monkey D. Luffy? But that's a fictional character! Hold on, didn't she just say her name was Nami? Come to think of it, she looks exactly like a real-life version of the Nami in One Piece, the navigator of the Straw Hats' ship... And I'm on a freakin' boat! WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON HERE?

She blinked and waved a hand in front of my face. "Hey, Damon, you in there?"

I decided with an option that made sense.

"You're very good at cosplaying," I told her.

Nami tilted her head, clearly confused.. "Eh? Cosplaying? What's that?"

I frowned. "You... you don't know what cosplaying is?"

"No. It sounds like some sort of game, though..."

"Oh, kuso!' I cursed. For some reason, I automatically said the Japanese word for 'shit'. I had no idea why, but my brain just randomly forced it out of my mouth. "This is not good... tell me, where am I?"

The redhead blinked, then smiled. "You're on my crew's ship, the Going Merry. We just got it from our newest crew member, Usopp's, friend Kaya."

My brain raced. Okay, so somehow I was in the world of One Piece, on the Going Merry. Also, it was probably sometime between the Syrup Village Arc and the Baratie Arc in the timeline, based on what Nami had just said and the fact that she was here and not on her way to Arlong Park.

"Yep this is definitely a dream," I decided. "Nami, slap me."

"Um... what?"

"Slap me. Across the face. This is a dream and I'm gonna wake up from it."

She raised an eyebrow and shrugged. "Okaaaay..."

She slapped me across the face.

WHACK!

"YOWCH! THAT HURT!" I yelped, tending to a reddening bruise on my cheek. "WHY DOES IT HURT?! YOU DON'T FEEL PAIN IN DREAMS!"

"Well, unless I'm having the same dream as you, you're not dreaming," Nami told me, sounding slightly amused.

It was then that Aeso's words came back to me: Very well. I suppose I'll have to prove it to you by sending you to the Luffyverse now.

By the Luffyverse, did he mean the world of One Piece?

"So, uh, can I meet Luffy? I need to talk to him about something," I said, thinking fast.

Nami frowned in confusion again. "Luffy? I don't know any Luffy. But my captain's Lucy..."

"...Say what now?"

"My captain's Lucy. You can see her."

Lucy? Her? ...The Hell? I didn't know what she was going on about, but I decided to play along.

"Okay, take me to... Lucy," I nodded.

"OI! LUCY! THE GUY FROM THE SKY WANTS TO MEET WITH YOU!" she shouted. "AND HIS NAME'S DAMON!"

I heard much scurrying outside the room, and then the door to the infirmary was flung open to reveal another girl, as well as a quick glimpse of the deck of the ship and the ocean.

The new girl was short and had a bandaged-up chest. How did I know this? She was shamelessly wearing a low v-cut red vest, which was luckily buttoned up. Her blue shorts only barely passed her thighs, and I wondered if this girl cared about her appearance at all. Her eyes were a beautiful hazel, and a straw hat with a red band strapped around it perched on her onyx black, long hair. A thin scar cut across her eye, but somehow that only made her cuter.

I once again found myself blushing as I looked at the girl. "Stop being such a freakin' pervert, Damon!" I muttered to myself, tapping on my head.

That was when I realized something. This girl looked exactly like the pictures online I'd seen of a female Monkey D. Luffy. Somehow... somehow I really had fallen into the world of One Piece, but Luffy was a freakin' GIRL!

"WHAT IN HELL'S GOING ON!?" I freaked in my head.

"Hey, mystery angel!" she cheered. "You're finally awake!"

"How... Whu..." I stuttered. Wow, such great linguistic skills, Damon.

"That's Lucy," Nami told me, side-eying the girl. "She's stuck on believing that you're an angel, since you fell from the sky and all."

"I... fell from the sky?"

"So are you an angel?" Lucy asked, literally jumping up and down in excitement. "Are you are you are you?"

"Sheesh, take a breath, and no, I'm not." I said, sweatdropping.

"Told you he wasn't," a man's voice muttered. And in stepped the most bad-ass guy I'd ever seen.

He was tall and muscular, and his body was heavily scarred. His oily head was topped with a tangle of green hair, and his face was fixed in a bored, sleepy expression. Three swords hung by his side. He wore a dirty, white shirt and dark green pants. A green bandana... no... haramaki was tied around his left wrist.

"No way," I said in awe. "Roronoa Zoro?"

He scowled. "Who the hell are you, and why did you fall from the sky?" He sounded exactly like the Japanese voice actor, if he had an English accent and spoke English.

"The name's Digger D. Damon," I said, and with a smile, I shook both Lucy's and Zoro's hands. Lucy's was small, feminine, but slightly callused, whereas Zoro's was thick and sweaty, and heavily callused. I gritted my teeth and winced. Zoro's grip was really tight. "I didn't even know I fell from the sky. Say, did a suitcase fall with me?"

All three of them looked to my left. "Oh, you mean that thing?" Nami asked, pointing to a very familiar black suitcase leaning up against the infirmary bed.

I grinned wider. "That's the one! Thank goodness this baby's here with me..."

"Why?" Lucy wondered. "Is it important? Is it an angel?"

I sweatdropped again. "Er... no. It's not an angel."

"Is it worth money?!" Nami shouted eagerly, her eyes changing into belli signs like in the anime.

Zoro and I both sweatdropped at that, though in my case it was now a double-sweatdrop.

"Ah... no." I told them. "Actually, it's pretty much been my home for the past two years."

"Your home? That thing?" The green-haired swordsman said skeptically. "Doesn't look big enough to be a home for a cat."

"I've been living in the streets, OK?" I grumbled. "All my necessary survival items are in that suitcase, so as far as I'm concerned, yes, it's my home."

"You live on the streets?" exclaimed an awed Lucy. "Wow, you must be really strong!"

"...No, not really. I mean, I can hold my own in a fight, but..." I decided to change the subject. "Anyway, you guys are kaizoku, right?" Again with the Japanese phrases...

"Yeah, how'd you know?" Lucy asked excitedly.

"...I can see into the future," I told her after thinking for a second.

"EH!? YOU MEAN YOU'RE A FORTUNE TELLER! SUGOOOOOI!"

Nami and Zoro frowned at me, looking like they didn't buy in to all this.

"Okay, um, first of all, the last island you visited was Gecko Island, right?" I began. It was kinda rhetoric. "And there you defeated the notorious Captain Kuro, who was supposed to have been killed by the Marines three years ago. In reality, however, he went in to hiding and began scheming to steal Miss Kaya's fortune. You met Usopp-san there. Also, before that, you guys defeated Buggy the Clown in Orange Town, and before that Lucy-chan saved Zoro-san from being executed at the Marine Base on Shell's Island."

I wasn't sure why I added the honorifics to the ends of their names. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that random Japanese words were mixed in with the English ones?

Zoro glared at me suspiciously. "How'd you know all that?!"

"I told you, I can see into the future. I... had a vision."

"Ne, you're awesome!" Lucy exclaimed, eyes sparkling anime-style.

I blushed a little. I've never received much praise, except from Cracked-Up Kane whenever I got stronger. "Oh, and you're either just sailing now, or you're heading to the Baratie."

"Nanda? What's the Baratie?" Lucy asked curiously.

"A famous sea restaurant."

Lucy's stomach growled. "RESTAURANT!? I can taste the food from here..."

I burst into laughter. Even Zoro managed to crack a smile. I guess that, girl or boy, Luffy is Luffy.

"Hey, you should join my crew, Damon!"

I blinked and looked at Lucy, who'd just spoken. "Really?"

"Hai! You could be our psychic!"

And that was how I became a part of the great Straw Hat Pirates. Who knows what awkward situations will come out of this, with Luffy being a girl and all, but this is my life now, and somehow or another, I know it will work out. A quote I'd heard a long time ago said, It always turns out good in the end. If it's not good, it's not the end.

And thus ends chapter 1.

Damon: What a shitty ending.

Shut the hell up, bro. I'm the author here, got it?

Damon: ...Can I at least kick ass soon?

Just because you asked... NO.

Damon: EH!? What a shit-author...

Lucy: Pleashe rate und revoo!

Nami: Don't talk with your mouth full of meat, Luce...

-TheRealEvanSG