This Is The Way The World Ends

A/N: I don't own Harry Potter. This is my first Remus/Sirius and it's going to start off pretty slowly. Title is taken from The Hollow Men by T.S. Eliot.

Chapter One:

It happens on a warm day, with two men facing each other, both looking violent and ready to explode. The difference between them, the big comma that hangs in the air, is the reason. Reason is everything.

One of them killed a whole street of muggles. This same man is responsible for the deaths of James and Lily Potter. The other man wants revenge. The other man is violent with passion and grief and pain.

The killer points his wand at the others chest, hesitates, then redirects the wand at his hand, slicing off one finger before vanishing. A rat leaves the place where the murderer stood.

The other man realises what has happened. He's been framed. Peter has made it look like it was him. He drops to his knees, picks up the finger and laughs. The laugh is shaky and pained and wrong. It sounds more like sobbing than anything else.

"Sirius-"

A familiar voice. The one named Sirius stands and turns.

Remus, he thinks, of course you'd find me. Too smart to believe that I would kill James and Lily.

"Sirius, you need to leave," Remus pleads, "you need to go as far from here as you can. Don't you understand? They're coming! Sirius, run!"

The man Sirius disappears and the dog Padfoot takes his place. He looks at Remus, longs for some kind of encouragement.

He hesitates, two beats, then turns and runs as fast as he can away from all the death.

***…***…***…***…

He had a rough idea of where he could go. He knew, however, that he couldn't be human again until his name had been cleared. He would be this black wolf until Remus found him once again.

As he ran, he remembered. James and Lily. James, his brother, his best and most trusted friend. Lily, the smartest witch he'd ever met, so bright and quick and funny. And their son, Harry.

Harry… Sirius felt an ache in his stomach. That boy would have no parents. An orphan, without family. Hopefully Remus would take him in. Though, technically, Sirius was his legal guardian.

Sirius was going to run to another country, he thought. Perhaps he could go to Ireland. He wasn't sure exactly, but he knew he needed to get away from the Ministry. He also needed to get off the main road or else he'd get caught.

It was then that he almost collided with a small child. He stopped himself just before he knocked the child over. The boy, who looked to be five years old (if that) saw Sirius and bit his lower lip.

Sirius froze, staying as still as he could.

The boy reached out one cautious hand and patted Sirius's black, matted fur.

Sirius didn't move; instead of disheartening the boy, as he had intended to do, this seemed to encourage the boy to pat Sirius again. Sirius bared his teeth, trying to scare the boy away but it was too late- the boy was turning to a woman (possibly his mother?) and pulling at her pant leg, he asked her who 'the dog' belonged to.

Sirius almost sighed with exasperation.

The woman turned to Sirius and bent down, looking for his collar.

Sirius realised, then, that this was exactly what he needed. The Ministry didn't know he was an animagus. He was close enough to the Ministry to keep up with what was happening, but this muggle family would be perfect for hiding his identity.

He decided, then and there, that he would live with this family. And whatever Sirius decides goes.

He whimpered softly and looked up at the woman with his eyes widened. She frowned.

"He might belong to someone, Jim."

The boy shook his head. "He doesn't have a collar! He's a stray!"

Sirius nuzzled the boy's hand with his head. The boy giggled and patted Sirius.

The woman sighed. "We'll take him to the vet, see what they have to say. No promises though, Jim."

Seemingly satisfied with this answer, the boy (Jim, Sirius thought, as in short for James?) beckoned for Sirius to follow him back to their Muggle car, which was red and rusty and probably a few years past its expiry date but Sirius didn't mind too much.

He settled in the back seat and the realisation of his life hit him in the snout.

Peter Pettigrew killed Lily and James. Remus was all alone. A whole street of Muggles were dead.

Sirius tried to remember how this all came to be.

***…***…***…***

"Have you told Remus yet?" Peter asked nervously. "About what I told you, I mean."

Sirius bit back a bitter laugh and shook his head. "Nah, mate. I haven't spoken to Remus in a while."

The truth was that after a very bitter fight one week before the full moon, Sirius had stormed from their shared apartment and wound up sleeping on James and Lily's couch. In return, he would babysit Harry whenever James and Lily needed a break.

Although, Harry was basically an angel, so James and Lily rarely needed a break.

However, before long, Remus – bloody noble idiot – had decided to move out of their shared apartment on the basis that technically Sirius owned it and so he should live there. The worst part was Remus's self-depreciating tone when he'd Apparated over one afternoon to tell Sirius.

It made Sirius feel guilty and angry and shitty with the world. He'd moved back in to the empty apartment, Remus taking his place on the Potters' couch.

"It's your place," Remus had murmured, "so you should move back in. I'm already packed. I just, I mean, I don't… Sirius, I didn't mean to upset you. I want this to work, but…"

"You're a werewolf and I don't understand." Sirius had finished what Remus would have said. "I guess it was always going to end like this, wasn't it?"

Remus had raised an eyebrow at this point. Sirius remembered how sad Remus's eyes looked when he asked "do you really believe that?"

Sirius remembered how shocked Remus looked when Sirius nodded.

He hadn't spoken to Remus since.

"So you thought about what I said?" Peter widened his eyes, the picture of innocence. Sirius dragged himself from his memories and back to Peter. "I mean, James agreed with me, so…"

Sirius nodded half-heartedly. "Yeah. I'll make you Secret Keeper."

"What? Really?" Peter seemed quite taken aback.

Sirius wondered whether Remus might have found Peter's behaviour suspicious. He realised that he didn't care what Remus thought anymore, so he threw all caution to the wind.

"Sure. You, Peter Pettigrew, are now Secret Keeper for the house of Lily and James Potter."

And with those words, Sirius felt something like a deep breath leave his mouth. He tasted something bitter on the roof of his mouth (was it blood?) and he had to swallow thickly before he could speak again.

Peter, however, seemed over the moon. Which was strange, right? Remus would have-

Remus isn't here, he reminded himself.

Peter grinned and Sirius grimaced, already regretting the words he had uttered five minutes earlier.

***…***…***…***

"Doggie, wake up."

Sirius was shaken awake by a small, pudgy hand. Little Jim was poking Sirius in the stomach. Sirius yawned and opened his eyes.

They had arrived at the vet, he noticed disconnectedly.

Jim's mother opened the door and went to pull him out of the car. Indignantly, Sirius helped himself out. He was too proud for his own good. James used to say that all the time.

James… Sirius's stomach lurched with regret and longing and despair. What had he done?

"Come on, doggie, let's go." Jim grinned and skipped ahead.

Jim's mother frowned concernedly and Sirius noticed how young she looked and how the blouse she wore seemed too large for her bony frame.

Sirius might have felt sorry for the woman but he was too busy feeling sorry for himself.

They arrived at the vet and the receptionist directed them through.

"I'll look after Jimmy, love. You just go straight through to see Doctor Brown." The receptionist winked at Jim's mum and directed Jim over to where a pile of toy cars lay in a bucket.

Apparently the vet was friends with Jim's mother. Sirius wished he knew her name. It just didn't feel right calling her 'Jim's mum'.

"Sam! So great to see you!" The vet, a middle-aged red-headed man, smiled toothily. Sirius frowned. Jim's mother, Sam, smiled wearily back.

"Hi, John. So nice of you to see us on such short notice."

"My pleasure! So, what can I do for you?"

This John fellow was suspicious, Sirius thought to himself. He sniffed the air around the man, trying to get a better idea on his personality.

Sam pursed her lips. "Jim found this mutt on the pavement earlier. I thought I'd bring him in here-"

"Homeless, is he?" The vet patted Sirius on the head. Sirius didn't like that very much; he growled.

Sam frowned. "Well, he doesn't have a collar-"

"So you want to put him down?" John asked casually, as though he were talking about the weather.

Sirius barked loudly. This wasn't in the bargain. He'd wanted to hide from the Ministry, to escape death, not to run closer towards it!

Sam seemed to be on the same page as him, luckily. "No! No, I just thought you could adopt him out or something!" She seemed pretty angry. Sirius was glad he had someone to stick up for him.

"Oh, right. Sorry about that. Well, I suppose we could try to adopt him out…"

Something about John's tone was wrong, Sirius noticed.

Sam noticed it too. "Don't worry," she forced a smiled and gestured for Sirius to come to her side, "I think I'll keep him after all. See you around, John."

She turned and left the room, Sirius following her eagerly. She had practically saved his life.

"Doggie!" Jim ran up to Sirius as soon as he saw Sam emerge from the room.

Sirius sighed with relief and allowed himself to be petted. It wasn't too bad, he thought. This child reminded him of Harry, except that Little Jim had tan-coloured skin and light brown hair. Like a mini-Remus, Sirius thought.

His affection for the kid grew even more.

"Come on, let's bring doggie in the car with us," Sam muttered, "and we'll stop by Tesco's later to buy him some food."

Jim beamed at his mum and set off back to the car, Sirius trailing behind him.

Sirius wished he could have felt safe or comfortable or satisfied, but the only emotion he could feel was guilt, mixed with a vague sense of impending doom.

He wondered how Remus was feeling.