Cupid's Daughter Delightful goddess of Serenity

by Atomdancerrr

Claire & Cupid wed. Suddenly his family's back! Claire fears for what's left of Trevor's sanity! But Delightful is born with powers to sooth. No longer lonely & a great Dad, Trevor blossoms. But CPS sees only “psychosis.” Can Love win?

Summery

Claire & Cupid wed. Suddenly his family's back! Claire fears for what's left of Trevor's sanity! But Delightful is born with powers to sooth. No longer lonely & a great Dad, Trevor blossoms. But CPS sees only "psychosis." Can Love win?

Author's Notes

This may be the cutest fan fiction I ever wrote. Where Uncle Mercury came from I do not know! There was no such Relative in my past. I only wish! But I do know this. I will do what I can to make sure the real Multiverse does now or someday contains Uncle Mercury. If ever a fictional Character deserves to exist it is this divine and goofy Winnie the Pooh of the little g gods!

This is a sequel (one of several, 1 already finished and posted to "Cupid After 8 Years as a Mortal," though it can be enjoyed without reading that one first. Again though this is about 2009 Cupid and Claire I had to borrow characters and history from the original 1998 show due to 2009's tragically short run. (I have since split Dr Greeley into two people, Milton and Charles are now brothers with Milton living in Chicago and Charles in New York and I am going to have to go back and do a little retro-writing in some of my earlier posted stories). Be assured that Cupid and Psyche will live forever! If the passing away of ancient Greece and the coming of the "New Administration" did not end the Greek gods, the foolish, foolish decisions of a few short sighted Television Executives certainly won't! In a few short years CGI Technology will be so easy and so cheap it will be possible to feed a fanzine story or at least a script into a program in your home computer and have a completely realistic looking TV episode come out the other end! Maybe we will be able to use the images of the original Actors, or maybe not. But there will be plenty of Folks willing to lend their images and voice sounds to such amateur productions and many will be very, very good. The professional powers that be will hate it of course. But they will no more be able to stop it than they can the writing and uploading of fanfiction today. If they are wise they won't even try to or they will be working against their show's biggest Fans! (They will buy or force advertising space on them instead!) As the Fans write and create, both Cupids will on "film" get their one hundredth couples matched, Samuel Becket will get home. The original Starship Enterprise will finish its 5 year mission, the ending to Beauty and the Beast will be redone (probably with Sam and Al's help) so both Cathryn and the Baby are rescued and more! (There is already a paper fanfiction written using this idea and I hope someday it is uploaded to the net!)

As Teilhard de Chardin said, "what rises converges." The Internet and Television are merging. Soon anyone can have their own television channel and put up their own productions. There will be so many channels it will be impossible for anyone to police their content, so what we Fans produce will be shown for any who want to, to watch no matter who screams and howls about it! Again if the original Networks are wise they will instead work out advertising deals or they will be destroying their best supporters and cutting off their own roots! (Geniuses don't live forever any more than other Humans do. And there only are so many. They will need those same Creatives to replace them when the time comes for replacements for their own companies!) And much better to have lots of pieces of many tiny pies than no pie at all! As Saint Francis said "there is enough for all." No where is that more Truth than in the area of ideas! One idea fuels a thousand, million others! So to scrabble over who owns Whom and What is extremely foolish!

Oh yes, the Good New Days are a coming and I'm feeling mighty nostalgic for our Grand Future!

Which is our Past due to circling time! ;-)

I won't quit writing these but I think now I will feel comfortable reading Gumtu's stories without fear of either plagiarizing or fearing to use the same idea! (His Cupid of course was 1998's). I haven't read his yet except for his early pre-one hundredth bead stories. So any similarities between his stories and mine are due to using the same original literature to expand upon. (Both shows and ancient myths). We were both drawing water from the same well.

Projects in the works include a 2009 version of Grand Delusions where "Trevor Pierce" gets to mentor an even crazier Lunatic, Don Quixote! (See the original 1998 version on You Tube). And further along, "The Ghost and the god" which will be a Ghost and Mrs Muir Crossover. I need help with this one and am asking for it. And If anyone could help me write a 1998 Cupid/Early Edition crossover and/or a Stargate crossover (either Cupid), please contact me. I have a roughed out plot but can't write for those characters.

Update: Cupid Grand Delusions 2009 is posted and lots of fun! I used some of the same scenes, even some of the same ideas but gave them a much different twist! And I stole no dreams. This Don Quixote stays Don Quixote! :)

Credits. Most of the "Elvis Impersonator" wedding vows comes almost word for word off a You Tube video about a Vegas Elvis Wedding. Considering he makes his living impersonating someone else I don't think that fellow will mind. :-)

My thanks to Gene Brewer who wrote the K-PAX book series and helped with the movie, for the analogy about "The space shuttle is like Columbus sailing back and forth off the coast of Spain for 30 years."

Copyright. (Extends to all my fanfiction). I saw what happened when the free Geo cities web pages ended without adequate warning. It was if a virtual Lost Atlantis had sank into a Cyber-Sea so much web culture was lost until Time circles round again! I won't exist forever in this realm and this site may go down someday. Plus more fanfiction sites start up all the time as the Internet expands as "the Earth becomes full of the knowledge of the Lord as the waters cover the sea!" (The Internet is part of our long destiny towards inventing New Jerusalem). To preserve my stuff forever and to spread it like the seeds of Wildflowers in the winds I give permission, to anyone to upload any of my fanfictions to any fanfiction sites provided they do not change anything and leave my name attached. In fact I beg Folks to do so! If in the Future someone wishes to translate my fanfiction into different forms of media including kinds not even conceived of at the time of this writing any changes necessary for that purpose may be made with my blessings provided the integrity of the stories, ideas and Characters are kept intact. Follow the Golden Rule please! "Treat others as you want to be treated." Remember in the Future Artificial Intelligence Technology will bring Fictionals to Self Awareness and we will use Science to build Heaven. (We are the Body of Christ according to 1 Corinthians 12:27 and all Carpenters use their Bodies to build things). Because Time circles due to General Relativity this has already happened so we are all being watched, always! A song sung at the Fort McCoy Pow Wow in Florida explained this very well; "Mickey Mouse and Goofy are Spirits too." So we will all be called to account (at least socially) for all our actions, even for how we treat Fictionals! (For instance a villain does not mind being written to provide challenges to the Protagonists and killed off because that is his purpose. Conflict is not really evil but necessary to drive both plots and evolution along! But a "villain" would mind being written contrary to how he was supposed to be written.

Part I

The Wedding of Cupid And Psyche

The World Felt The Tremor,

And The Darkness Was Pierced!"

Their Just The Right Sized, Greek god,

Elvis Impersonator, Wedding Planning, Session

The Elvis Impersonator looked at the couple in front of him. "Let me get this straight. You want a Greek version of an Elvis Wedding?"

The Man nodded. He had a very cheery smile.

"Elvis" took a good look at his new Customers. The Lady was gorgeous! They are going to make such a nice Couple! Why don't they just find an ordinary Minister or Justice of the Peace? They were too normal to be being hitched by me. "That's kind of an unusual request. But I think I can accommodate it. I'll take it one or both of you are Greek?"

The man nodded, "Yes. I'm a very ancient, Thessalonian Greek."

Elvis stared at him. "Ancient? You don't look a day over 42."

The man said, "I'm actually 3009 years old but I'm willing to lie on the marriage license to keep down the questions."

Elvis's jaw dropped, "Huh?"

The Lady said, "This is kind of an unusual situation. I used to be his Therapist and one of his Psychiatrists." She shrugged and looked a bit embarrassed. "What can I say? We fell in love. So when he proposed I accepted his proposal and found him other help. He's made some progress but obviously he's not quite cured yet!" Claire sighed. "At least when he's married to me he'll be even easier to keep an eye on than he is already!"

Elvis blinked. "Was he awake or was this a weird dream? "He's easy to keep an eye on?"

She nodded, "Yes. Most of the time. I'd say 95 percent of the time. Sometimes he does wild things like go to the library or to the roof of the bar where he works to pray to his family the gods of Olympus without letting me know his 'Cupid flight plan.' But most of the time he's a real sweetie about staying on a short leash. It's reassuring. It keeps my Boss off our backs about his being allowed to run lose."

"Elvis" stared.

And he stared.

And he stared!

Finally he said, "Ah, are we on Candid Camera?"

Both of them shook their heads in unison. It was almost as if their heads were tied together with strings.

Oh we oh!

"Elvis" finally got up the courage to ask, "What exactly do you think you are? I ought to know if I'm going to be hitching you. I'm supposed to do premarital counseling first."

The Man said, "Oh goody! We've only had about a hundred or so hours of premarital counseling. We certainly can use some more, can't we, Claire Bear? When can we begin? What do you want to discuss first? The Man started counting on his fingers. 'Money, cars, Child rearing practices, Pet preferences, use and division of personal space, who does what and when or spiritual compatibility? We stink on that last one. I'm was and will be a god and Claire Bear here thinks there might be Something and roots for It and prays to Whomever it might concern. But hey I'm over 3009 years old. I've seen every possible combination of Mortal belief and disbelief, and the gods are actually really tolerant about that. Well Jesus isn't, but considering what you Mortals put Him through I can sympathize, can't you? As for me, Claire Bear could be something really weird like a Presbyterian and I'd still love her! Oh I'm Eros by the way. Though I also answer To Cupid, Love, Amour, Love, or Trevor Pierce." The Man stood up and put his right hand across the desk to shake.

Elvis gave the god of love a very weak handshake. He was in shock!

"Cupid smiled, "You can't sing "You ain't nothin' but a Hound Dog at our wedding, but you could sing you ain't nothing but a hound god if you wanted to!"

'Elvis' tried to grasp at something normal. "You like Dogs?"

"Cupid nodded, "Yes, but we were thinking of getting a Cat instead. They're easier to care for and we both work so much. Well actually I'd like to get a Siberian Tigress like my childhood Pussy, Sasha (poor Baby) but I don't think that would quite work out in Queens."

"Elvis" didn't know where to start trying to sort out fact from craziness! Finally he said, "you think you are a god and you WORK?"

The man nodded cheerfully, "Oh yes, across the street from my Wife's mental hospital. I manage Tres Equis. That's the best Mexican bar and grill in all of Queens if not New York!" He smiled, "I still get to bar tend too. That's what I like best; dealing directly with the Customers. The Doctors and the Nurses and the Orderlies from my Wife's hospital come in all the time. It long ago got to to the point where the amount of mood altering drugs I've dispensed to them far outweighed the amount of mood altering drugs they'd dispensed to me! And they know it and they're cool about it. They trust me."

That last declaration was the most frightening of all! "You drug your Doctors!"

Claire spoke up quickly. "Alcohol, sir. It is a mood altering drug and Trevor knows that. He's a very responsible Bartender. He knows when to cut off a Customer and yes he has had to do it to some of the Staff of my hospital a few times! He also knows how to be discreet. Those incidences never got back to the hospital. Unless I just happened to be there I don't even know who those incidences involved. He just tells me privately that some one from the hospital went too far again. He is as good at keeping a professional confidence as we are. And amazingly some of them come to him for advice!"

"They follow it too." Cupid pointed out. "One of the Doctors named his Child after me. I'm why his Little Squirt exists."

Elvis stared again, "I can't help but ask. What did you tell him?"

The Man grinned, "I told him to try B vitamin injections or at least the pills to increase his wife's sex drive. I knew this because B vitamins were some of the stuff in my my magic arrows back before my family took those away from me. The other chemical you contemporary Mortals know about that was in my magic arrows is oxytocin, the love hormone. The rest of the stuff in my little hypos hasn't been discovered yet. But we gods know about it because the building Mortals create us gods far in the Future and time circled round again."

'Elvis' stared at the Lady his mouth open!"

Claire laughed, "He's telling the truth about the B vitamins. It can sometimes perk up a weak libido and somehow he figured out that was the Doctor's Wife's problem. I figure it's harmless him recommending B Vitamins to a Doctor. I always say Trevor sounds mad but acts sane. Nothing in the above statement he made includes any delusions or confabulations that in any way compromises his ability to cope with present day reality. That is why he can manage Tres Equis. His break with reality only concerns his memories not his senses. He does not take in false information. He does not hallucinate. He also doesn't think he has any magic powers so I don't have to worry about him jumping off a building trying to fly. He just remembers living on top of Mount Olympus and thinks someday he will go back there after death and he thinks I'm going to go with him as his Psyche, as in Cupid and Psyche."

Trevor grinned, "She was my Psyche-iatrist!"

Claire added proudly. "Trevor fits no stereotypes of what a Psychotic Delusional is supposed to be capable of. He's acted in a major episode of a Police drama as the perp, led fund raising drives to support Autism research, helped solve a murder in which he had been the main suspect, directed, starred in and uploaded You Tube videos, and yes he manages a bar. He even officiated at a commitment ceremony once. I don't mean a psychiatric commitment. I mean what you do. It wasn't legally binding of course but that was the point. The young couple didn't want to be legal, just to publicly demonstrate their promise to each other. No it wasn't a gay couple, just a straight couple simpatico with Billy Graham's comment that 'the real threat to family values is Heterosexual divorces not Homosexual marriages.' My future Husband's aptitude scores are so far off the chart I have no idea what his real IQ is since he finished every test way too quickly but he could talk rings around Einstein. He uses his superior intelligence to cope with his shaky grasp of reality. He can so to speak step outside himself and see the normal viewpoint even if he knows for a 'fact' in his heart of hearts we are the ones who are delusional, not him. That's how he copes with us 'Mortals.' He humors us so much we hardly ever have to humor him and so he can pass for normal when he wants to. He just doesn't want to very much. He's too honest."

"Elvis" was amazed! "Did the couple know this Man thinks he's Cupid?"

Claire nodded, "Oh yes. That was the point. They wanted to be hitched by the god of love. Lots of People believe him, sir."

This should have been Candid camera! "You know sir, you could turn that into a nice side business. After all I only act as if I'm Elvis. You BELIEVE you are Cupid!"

Cupid nodded, Good idea but I don't know when I'd find the time! Between work and Claire and being Secretary of my Star Trek club...'

'Elvis's' jaw dropped, "You belong to a Star Trek Club?"

Trevor nodded, "Everyone needs a hobby. Would you like to hear 'Space the final frontier,' etc in ancient, Thessalonian Greek?"

"Elvis" shook his head and frowned, "I usually say a prayer for God to bless the marriages I officiate over. I guess that's out!"

To his amazement and relief, the Man who thought he was Cupid said gently and without hesitation, "No. Leave it in."

And the Lady looked very happy about that!

Cupid explained. "I don't mind a prayer to The Big Guy to bless our marriage one bit. I'll take all the blessing we can get. Besides He is what networks us all together. Your Mortals are His cells. We gods are His organs."

"Elvis."stared at Trevor in surprise. So did Claire.

A few seconds passed while everyone thought about that! Then gently Claire explained, "I wanted a church wedding and Trevor had no objections but I knew no regular Minister would accept Trevor. You are unconventional enough I have hope!"

"Elvis" nodded, his eyes full of compassion. Up until then he hadn't been willing to do it. But his third impression told him they were in better shape than his second impression had lead him to believe! "Trevor it is obvious your love for Claire is real even if you don't know who you really are! And Claire I guess since you are a Psychiatrist you have the necessary skills to handle this poor, severely confused Person and he obviously doesn't mind being handled! And you love him too! I am starting to sort of see why. He does seem to have a considerable amount of wisdom, which is amazing! Because gee whiz is he ever nuts!... But I will marry you! And who knows, maybe that will bring you back to reality, sir!"

Trevor just smiled at him. He said nothing. He was too wise to argue.

They hashed out the details of the wedding. Trevor stated "The usual vows would be OK, but you must leave out the words, 'til death do us part' because just as my Claire Bear said I believe when she dies my Claire Bear is going to be made into the goddess Psyche and I will be given my own godhood back. So our love is for all Eternity. Death will never part us!"

"Elvis" glanced at the Lady to get her take on this odd exclusion.

The Lady, right in front of her Lunatic, told Elvis to "humor him."

And amazingly that didn't disturb "Cupid" one bit! Apparently they had come to some kind of a fantastic, separate peace about their different concepts of reality! She didn't mind it that her Husband To Be was clinically crazy and Husband To Be didn't mind it that Wife To Be thought him so!

"Elvis had been told by his Mom years ago that if he lived long enough he would see everything. He had not believed her. Now he did!

Elvis smiled. "I actually have my own vows I wrote that I use. Of course you may use any vows you want but what do you think of these?" He pushed two pieces of paper across his desk.

Trevor and Claire picked them up and read them. Twin smiles crossed their faces and at the same time they said, "Absolutely perfect!"

'Oh we oh.' Number two!

So they got into wedding planning.

Elvis was amazed at the size of the guest list. "One hundred and sixty three Persons! I never had so many come to one of my weddings! Most People who want me to marry them want it done quickly with little hullabaloo as possible and I'm surprised when the immediate Family even comes. And how come the odd number? Who plans to come without a Partner?"

"Cupid" said, "That's Jerry. He wants to come and his friends are rather on the ephemeral side. They would be welcome to come but we'd have to hire a Plumber to take our pipes apart to get them to the wedding and I think my Boss would object."

"Huh?"

Claire decided to just watch and see how Trevor explained that statement, but she was prepared to step in if she had to.

Trevor explained, "Our Dishwasher at my bar is a Schizophrenic named Jerry. His best friends live in our plumbing. I don't know how to get them to the wedding for him but maybe they will show up at the reception. We plan to hold that at Tres Equis."

Elvis scratched the top of his head. "Is he well behaved?"

Claire stepped in, "Of course. You've been watching too many horror movies! He's almost as harmless as Trevor. He wouldn't harm a fly!"

Trevor said, "Ah Claire, Jerry is in charge of watching out for Bugs in the kitchen and alerting me to that fact when it happens so I Felix or I can call our pest control company which I have done many times. So technically..." He grimaced.

Claire laughed.

So did "Elvis," very nervously.

Claire added quickly, "But Trevor and Jerry wouldn't harm any mammals!"

Cupid sighed. "Tell that to the Pig whose bacon I ate this morning! No I didn't directly butcher him or her but I'm guilty of helping drive the market! I'm still a work in progress. Maybe someday I'll manage to become a Vegetarian but right now spaghetti with meatballs and those great New York hot dogs just smell too goooood! Probably by the time I do get ready you Mortals will have perfected stem cell vat meat so it will be moot! And remember ancient Mortals instinctively salivated for a good plate of ribs just as much as you Modern Mortals. They solved the ethical dilemma of killing some poor Animal by convincing themselves we gods demanded sacrifices and that supposedly got you off the ethical hook! We did demand sacrifices sometimes but only when we noticed Children were protein starved while the richer Members of their tribes had Cattle a plenty. Because those "religious rituals" were really barbecues. And usually those poor Kids got fed too because in at least some of the tribes it was like communion. Every member of the tribe was given a share of the god's food. You Mortals ate in proxy what was so to speak offered to us gods. Now back before the Administration change I was the guest of honor at many such a 'religious ritual.' But I was actually physically present at some of them because I'm sorry but I do love a good barbecue! So over the millenia many a poor, innocent Animal has died for my sins! Sorry!" Cupid looked embarrassed. Then he shrugged, "You modern American Mortals actually have a very similar ritual. It is called a 'tail gate party.' These are held in honor of football. Robin Williams pointed out football is only different from other religions due to the time of its services; Sunday afternoons not Sunday mornings!"

'Elvis' started belly laughing at that! Trevor you are all right! You are nuts but you are alright!"

Claire relaxed a bit. Once people started belly laughing at Trevor they usually weren't afraid of him anymore. The wedding was definitely going to be a go!"

Elvis said, "We have a technical problem. My little chapel can't begin to hold this many."

Claire said, "I am Friends with a high school Principle. We held a dance in his school's auditorium for one of my other Patients there and for our single's group. I could probably get him to allow us to hold our wedding there."

Elvis nodded. "Is the bar big enough for the reception? You have your Boss's permission?

Again both the Man and the Lady nodded together as if their heads were tied together with strings and they said, "yes." Both at the same time.

The next few weeks were a whirl of the usual pre-wedding stresses and jitters. The Mental Patient stayed fairly calm. The Psychiatrist was turning into a bitchy, nervous wreck. Cupid considered this one day as he listened to his beloved Claire Bear screaming on the phone at still another, obviously-not-going-to-be-their-Cake-Baker. Maybe that was the point of having such a stressful time right before the honeymoon. It allowed Folks to see what their potential Partner was going to be like under severe stress and provided one last chance to back out if what was observed was not tolerable.

But nothing would ever make him leave his Claire Bear/Psyche, not even her developing some long term real mental illness as opposed to his false one! The god of love smiled. Pre-wedding jitters obviously counted as some kind of mental illness no matter what the DSM did or did not say, but at least it was temporary!

Evening came. Cupid grabbed a dart out of the drawer in his nightstand and tossed it at a date on the calender on their wall. It landed exactly where he wanted it to right under an entire row of similarly well thrown darts. Thus Cupid marked the passage of still one more day. Cupid pulled the string on his nightstand lamp and snuggled down in bed next to his soon-to-be Wife. Ten more days and ten more darts and Wedding Day would arrive and hopefully Claire Bear's madness would be over!

Love me Tender Love me True

Cupid thought to himself, "The auditorium has been turned into the prettiest temple I have ever seen! And I've seen plenty! Of course my view point is biased by love, but hey, Love is who I AM!

It was beautiful! Colored plastic "stained glass" had been placed over all the windows turning the auditorium into a kaleidoscope of color The colored light dappled down in shades of lavender and dark blue, dark red and emerald green. It really did look like a church!

Huge purple clay pots of pink, lavender and white Roses lined the aisle. The nicest thing about those Roses were they still had their roots in dirt. The auditorium had copious Flowers and all of them were alive and in some kind of potting mix. Cupid/Trevor had insisted, "Dying Flowers are not to be used to commemorate Claire and my eternally-alive love for one another!" After the ceremony all the Plants were to be donated to various garden clubs to be used to beautify some of the less savory parts of the borough.

The aisle was lined with a purple carpet. Claire had spared no expense.

The Guests had been told, "Wear your most colorful clothing, not necessarily your most expensive." And so they did. Tie dyed everything was in abundance. It was coming back in style anyway in a way that even the 1960's had not known for now it was considered mainstream.

Another sign that the 9/11 recession was over.

The carpet and the Flowers were fancy but everybody sat in metal folding chairs except for a few that required sturdier seats. That was because every Guest had been issued an inexpensive plate and a piece of paper that had instructions on it:

"Hi Mortals! I am doing the best I can to combine American and Greek traditions here. It is customary at Greek weddings to break plates and dance. So here's your plate. After I kiss the bride and "Elvis" dismisses Claire and myself, please fold up your folding chair and take it over to the side of the auditorium. Then when the music starts playing dance and break your plate. Toss them hard as you want but not at each other! Then dance!"

Trevor Cupid Pierce

PS

No Cupid is not being 'Crazy Trevor' here. This really is a Greek tradition. Please try not to hurt one another! I've managed to stay 'harmless to myself and others' for about nine years now. Don't mess it up for me now!

Marshal Wilson who Trevor had nick named "Mini Cupid" because of the very Trevorish- -like finagling and trickery he arranged in his successful attempt to get his Mother and his Sperm Donor united in True Love, happened to be back in town on Spring Break from his last year in pre-med School. The minute he was back in Queens he had called his old Chemistry Tutor who was also the "Yenta" who had helped him with his successful finagling. He was delighted to hear Claire and Trevor had become Cupid's own one hundredth matched couple. Trevor had asked him to DJ for their wedding.

He commented as he looked at the names of the tracks Trevor had picked out. "This is an interesting selection of music you are using. Where ever on the Planet and the the ISS did you get a chorus of Elvis Impersonators singing 'Love Me Tender Love me True' in ancient Greek?"

Cupid smiled, "I taught it to our Elvis phonetically and had him sing it into my lap top microphone. Then I took Tonto, which is what Claire calls her faithful computer companion to work with me. During my break I borrowed Felix's and put it on his lap top also. Then I played them both at once and re-recorded it again. Then I put the doubled-up recording on Tonto and Felix's and re-recorded that on mine and so forth and so on. We had the song without the lyrics in our Karaoke collection. Once I had as many Elvishes as I wanted for my Greek-Elvis chorus I recorded it playing with the karaoke track too. I had to slow the karaoke track down a bit. That was the hardest part. The whole project was simple but complicated, just like love."

"Mini-Cupid" smiled. "did you know there is software you could have bought or downloaded that would have made that much simpler?"

Cupid nodded, "But you know being over 3000 years old I'm kind of old fashioned at times. That way was so much simpler for me."

Marshal laughed. "Oh my Crazy Trevor I have missed you!"

Trevor asked, "So what specialty are you going in to?"

"Psychiatry. Doe that surprise you?" "Mini-Cupid's" eyes twinkled. "I kind of got interested in that specialty because a dear, Childhood Friend of mine was and is definitely off the deep end!" He grinned. "But don't worry Cupid. I'm not going to try and cure you. You are a work of art!"

"That's what Folks keep telling me! Trevor said mischievously, "Do you think it should concern me that so many of my good Friends are Shrinks and I am NOT a Doctor?"

Mini-Cupid laughed. "They used to think being gay was a mental illness. Now we can go to med school. Who knows maybe in time they'll let People who insist they are Greek gods go to med school too!"

Trevor nodded, "After all I mix and dispense a dangerous, mood altering drug every day!

Marshal nodded thoughtfully. "Now that is true. One of the most dangerous of them all! Oh by the way I plan to do my thesis on you." Then he added, "I am assuming you don't mind?"

Trevor smiled ruefully and shook his head, "I would be very proud. But stand in line! Claire Bear has already beaten you to it. I've been written up in two of the best medical journals on the Planet. Dr Leo has a poem, believe it or not, in a psychiatric journal about me and I think my current Therapist, Donna is working on something. Then there is Claire's book. I think she finally found an ending for it. The last chapter is going to be called, 'If you Can't Cure Em, Marry Them!'"

Marshal smiled. "I think there is enough material in you I can find something fresh to mine. None of them had you as their High School chemistry Tutor or had you help unite their Mother and their Father. They see you only as a Patient. Even though well on the way to becoming a brand new Shrink I also see you as your soul tells you, you are, Cupid the Greco-Roman god of love! Because you aren't my Client. I was one of yours!"

Trevor grinned, "Thanks Mini-Cupid!"

They high fived, then pinky shook.

Trevor's watch and his cell phone alarm both went off at the same time. So did Marshal's. He grinned. "Time to get to my station!" He ran off to their improvised DJ booth and in a few moments the Elvis Greek Chorus of 'Love Me Tender Love me True' started playing.

Claire appeared at the back of the auditorium. Trevor felt his heart go up in his throat but it was from love not fear at beholding his Psyche so beautifully attired! (But to Cupid most of her beauty was inwards).

Her dress was lavender. It had pink lace and her paper bouquet was white to compliment the aisle of Roses.

Claire's Jazz Singer Dad locked arms with Claire and they walked down aisle. He moved like a proud old Human, (either 1.0 or 2.0 type).

Three "Cupid Kids," Children who had been born to two of Trevor's matched Couples followed behind throwing paper flower petals. Cupid's acute hearing overheard such comments as, "Ohhh! Aren't they darling!" And, "The Lunatic Dr. McCrae is marrying brought their Parents together!" And, "Isn't that amazing!" And "To think they wanted to over-drug him and lock him up!"

(Some of their Descendants would form a colony on Mars underneath the shadow of Olympus Mons called, "Eros Mars Colony." Their motto would be, "We Martians Exist Because of Love!"

The Bridesmaids wore lavender dresses that resembled Orchids. All their corsages were paper in agreement with Trevor/Cupid's request no dying Flowers be used.

The Male Attendants wore emerald green suits. Claire had not been happy when her soon-to-be husband informed her the Males in the wedding party were going to be as colorfully attired as the Ladies. "After all I am colorful not crazy and in nature the Males are almost always more colorful than the Females." Trevor/Cupid borrowed their Apartment Neighbor's sewing machine and worked here a little, there a little as he could find time in his already crowded schedule until he had the suits sewn up himself.

Claire was amazed! Another talent no one realized Trevor had! And she added, "Fashion designer? Tailor?" To her long list of possible pasts for her "demented" Ex-Patient. Claire had to admit to herself, they actually complimented the bridesmaid's dresses as if they had been designed to go with them. (Which of course they had). They went with the lavender Orchid dresses as if they were the stems and leaves for those Flowers!

Felix saw his he said, "Wow Cupid! This is very well made! Too bad I can't just wear it any day I need to go formal but at least I know what I will be wearing for St Patrick's day the rest of my life."

Cupid could not help himself! Claire was just too beautiful! The whole thing was just too beautiful! That he, he the Gilligan of the gods would come to this when he had thought his fate to be drugged and cast down forever! Because if he had been locked up forever for being a "delusional Mental Patient" he would have died a Mortal death before he could have got his Couples matched! His Claire Bear had saved him, would go on to straighten out his family and now this vision of perfect loveliness was going to make him the happiest Man in two separate realms! He started bawling with happiness!

That did it! Overcome by his own emotions Felix handed his divine but still crazy Bar Manager a tissue and started howling with laughter as hard as "Crazy Trevor" was crying!"

Lita gave them both a dirty look. Cupid thought to himself, What happened to Women being the emotional ones?"

But then he noticed Livy McCrae. Claire's Mother was crying too. Her eyes and tears looked like blue sapphires behind crystalline glass. She gave Trevor a happy little wave and a sunny little smile thru her tears and Trevor returned the same happy little wave and sunny, teary smile. So it was 1 to 1 and there will be no Mother in Law problems in this family!

At Lita's feet Jalapeno and Pedro lay, sighing happily, occasionally sniffing all the fresh and wonderful scents in the air and thumping their tails, happy to be at the feet of their Humans as only very old Dogs can be happy. They had no idea what was going on but they were in the presence of their gods who seemed to be having a wonderful time and that made them deliriously happy! This is as good as it gets!

They had no idea what a wonderful Afterlife they were headed to. Many billions of years from now long after we made the little g gods, Humans would evolve into the Omega Point/grow up in all ways into the Head into Christ (Ephesians 4:15). But even as One Collective Mind, Humanity would never forget the gentled Wolves who had been beside them in the more dangerous parts of their journey around Fate's Wild Wheel. Not one Dog, not one Puppy (however unwanted and abused in this life), not even one Embryo ever falls apart from the Father. No truer words were ever spoken by Hollywood. "All Dogs go to Heaven." (Cats and everything else too). But while wild Animals fly and run wild all over New Jerusalem, all Dogs and Cats stay forever in the Father's arms, and the Equines, Chickens, Pigs, Sheep and Cattle stand and relax forever before Him. (Yes, Pigs. We weren't supposed to eat them, but we did, and that earned them the right to exist forever before The Father with all the other Animals who served Humanity the most).

Claire had been dubious at Trevor's insistence that his Boss's Dogs be allowed to attend the ceremony. But she had to admit they were very well behaved! Better maybe than some of the Two Foots would be!

William McCrae came up to "Elvis" and unhooked his arm from his Daughter's. His eyes were glistening. Cupid thought. Two to one in the Male's favor with the crying!

"Elvis" began. "Marriage is a joyous occasion. It is connected in our hearts with magic charm of moment with all that pleasant and attractive and the tender and most sacred relations of life.

It is written that Love suffers long. Love is kind, Love doesn't envy. It doesn't parade itself. Nor is it puffed up. And Love doesn't behave rudely. It doesn't seek its own. Nor is it provoked. Love thinks no evil, it does not rejoice in iniquity but Love always rejoices in truth."

Cupid thought to himself. That Paul-Mortal sure knew how to describe me!

"Elvis" said, "Now if you Claire and you Trevor have been present for the purpose of being joined in marriage would you signify this by turning and facing each other and holding hands?

Claire and Trevor did so. Claire smiled demurely. But Trevor looked like a Cat well fed on Canary.

"Elvis" said, Do you Trevor take this Lady, Claire that you now hold by your hand to be your wedded Wife? Do you promise to love and cherish her in sickness and in health, in prosperity and in adversity?"

Trevor exclaimed, "I DO!"

"Elvis" said, "Claire do you in like manner agree to receive Trevor as your wedded husband, to love and to respect him, to be with him in all faith and tenderness, in health and ALL sickness and in prosperity and in adversity?

Claire smiled and said more quietly but with just as much conviction. "I do!"

"Elvis" said, "The ring is the circle. It's the emblem of Eternity, and it's made of gold, the type that is least tarnished but most enduring. And the ring shows how lasting, how imperishable the love and the faith you share with each other. My prayer for you is the permanence of these vows you are about to recite."

Then "Elvis" said, "Trevor would you take the ring and place it on Claire's left finger? And repeat after me.

"Claire I give you this ring"

Trevor said, "Claire I give you this ring."

"Elvis" said, "as a pledge."

Trevor said, "as a pledge."

"Elvis" said, "and a token of the vows."

Trevor said, "and a token of the vows."

"Elvis" said, "we share between us this day."

"Trevor said, "We share between us each day."

Claire would you take the other ring and replace it on his left finger and repeat after me."

"Trevor I give you this ring"

Claire said, "Trevor I give you this ring"

"Elvis" said, "as a token and a seal."

Claire said, "as a token and a seal."

"Elvis" said, of the covenant we made."

Claire said, "of the covenant we made."

"Elvis" said, "Together this day."

Claire said, "Together this day."

Elvis said, "Join both your hands together. Let's bow our heads. I'd like to do a blessing on your marriage.

"Elvis" said, "Father I thank you for Claire and Trevor and the love in their hearts for each other for it's a love you placed here and I ask you to bless their marriage. May nothing ever separate them divide them, or come between them and may all they set their hands to do in their wonderful relationship together, may it prosper in the name of our Lord, amen.

"The very best of marriages

Are made by the best of friends

who face together hand in hand

whatever life sends.

They are not afraid to share

The deepest feelings of the heart

And respect each others need

To sometimes spend some time apart.

They support each other faithfully

When troubles come their way

They don't blame in haste or anger

But show love by what they say.

They make marriage like true friendship

Full of things that show we care

and find a lot of happiness

in all the love they share.

"For as much as Trevor and Claire have consented together in this marriage ceremony, and it's been witnessed today before God and you've given in pledge your vows to each other and declared the same by joining your hands and your hearts! I now pronounce you husband and Wife!

"Trevor you may kiss your Wife."

Trevor went, "YAY!" And pounced on Claire, not that she minded. It was about two minutes before they came up for air!

Elvis smiled, "Congratulations, Claire and Trevor!"

Usually Elvis would have sang, 'Viva New York!' Here but he knew Claire had wanted a traditional marriage. He would have worn something different than his Elvis suit, but his hair was actually cut like Elvis's and without the white studded suit he would have felt out of uniform. But the Greek chorus he had done for Trevor relieved him of the need to sing and wiggle anyway so he did not gyrate his pelvis around and grasp at his belt buckle the way he usually would. Instead of acting like Elvis he acted like who he really was, Roman Polanski who was just about to board a plane headed for Vegas to make it as a Night Singer when he heard a booming voice right inside his skull that said, "DO NOT GO!"

The next day while researching Schizophrenia at a public library he met his True Love.

It had to be the shortest case of Schizophrenia in history for he never heard The Voice again. As the months passed and his love blossomed he came to the conclusion God did indeed work in mysterious ways and there was something he was supposed to do for God right in Brooklyn. But the thought of becoming a Mundane terrified and disgusted him! Conventional was not who he was!

As more months passed he figured out what he was supposed to do! He was supposed to bring a little Vegas Magic right to New York but do it in such a way it supported family values! Which is why he became an Elvis Impersonator Marriage Minister. He wrote his vows himself and to his amazement his track record was better than conventional Ministers. The divorce rate ran 50/50. But about 80 percent of the People he hitched were still together after twenty years! It had to be the vows! People told him they were inspired!

He smiled. Apparently at least one Greek god thought so too!

In his make-shift DJ's booth in the back of the auditorium Marshal switched to Dostou dostou

and as per instructed everybody who could put the chairs up did so and started breaking plates and stomping on them, doing the worse imitation of an Ikariotikosin the history of our beautiful Planet!

Claire laughed in sheer joy at the silliness of it. "Husband usually 'Mortals' behave much more organized than this when you want them to sing and dance. What happened? Did tying the knot take away even more of your 'powers'?" She made quote marks with her fingers.

Trevor just stood there admiring the amazing sight! His eyes twinkled and he grinned. "I'm letting them do whatever they want to do, this time. It's more ...interesting ...and fun!"

After about half an hour of that pandemonium Marshal announced, "Alright would everybody please head to Tres Equis for the reception? The dry cleaner's up the road is closed today and cheerfully agreed to be our over overflow parking lot. Thank you."

About half an hour later the party commenced at Tres Equis. Felix's cook had done a fine job of putting out a mixed Mexican and Greek spread with a little help from a caterer from St Nick's.

Cupid suggested, "Try the mole sauce on the brizoles. They are very good together!"

Many People did. And so a new, New York tradition was born!

The Mexican band did there best to keep up the Greek tradition by playing traditional Greek wedding music. Trevor thought to himself, They really aren't doing too badly. I sure hope at least some of my family are bothering to watch!

Another really disorganized Ikariotikos got going and Felix went around begging people not to break the Tres Equis dishes!

He suddenly felt a subtle mental change inside himself. His brain buzzed a few seconds like he was receiving that low voltage Bunny battery 'shock treatment" some Depressives were using to self treat. He looked around him. Even Mortals were capable of occasionally generating static electricity and they could build up a considerable charge.

But there were no likely suspects near him. No one had touched him!

Suddenly he realized his family was closer than he'd thought!

The New 'Glitch' in Trevor's Mind

Cupid suddenly noticed two people at the back of the room. One was craggy faced, red haired and extremely tall. The other one was very muscular from the waste up. But his left leg was severely deformed. The little guy was slightly hunched over from years of peering at scrolls and performing experiments. There was a permanent scowl on his face from millenia of pain and bitterness. He sat in an antique, wicker wheelchair that was almost falling apart. It had shoulder straps and a seat belt on it similar to ones used to keep very weak People from falling out of their chairs. But Cupid knew those straps were there for a different purpose. Those straps were there to hold the chair to its rider when the guy took flight!

The inhabitant of the chair was his autistic, movement impaired, fellow god and his Mother's ex-husband, Uncle Vulcan!

The extremely tall red head was his war god father's brother, his beloved, laid back and loopy, Uncle Mercury!

Amazed and delighted "Trevor" looked around. Suddenly there were tiny but powerful demons perched on some of the liquor bottles! There was a huge, ten foot tall Angel with a light saber guarding a Minister and his Wife who had come from one of his Matched Couple's place of work; a street mission that tried to help the homeless. There were a couple of Fairies (the supernatural kind) playing flight-tag near some ornamental sombreros. Felix had a Pegasus nibbling on his hair and he didn't even know it! Lita was being followed by an evil spirit who was trying to give her a case of anxiety and completely succeeding!

Trevor was amazed! This was a development he had not anticipated! But thinking back to the rules of his expulsion it made sense!

The rules were if he had sex with a Mortal before returning to Mount Olympus he would be stuck in the Mortal realm until his natural death. So he had temporarily given up his chance to return to godhood to marry his Psyche before he had matched one hundred couples. He had deliberately done so by making Claire Bear and himself his one hundredth Couple and having sex with her to guarantee he would not be going back to Olympus any time soon. But he also had gotten all his two hundred Mortal's matched. So though he had "failed" to follow the rules well enough to be returning to Olympus he never-the-less had fulfilled the terms of his punishment. So he was no longer cut off from experiencing the supernatural realm! The psychic veil/mental force field had been lifted from his mind again!

His family was back in his life again and with them all the other denizens that made up the realm he once had "swam in!"

What a wedding present!

Cupid was so over-joyed he had to Snoopy-dance around Tres Equis! It was amazing they had even come! The scribing Mortals had declared the gods did not accept Psyche at first. In order to follow the holy scriptures many of his family had to snub them even if their personal preference would have been not to do so! What Mortals want with their gods is what they get! But so many of the scriptures made no sense! Why weren't the scribing Mortals kinder? For instance why did Vulcan have to have a bad leg? Why didn't Mortals make their gods healthy and happy and kind to one another instead of the thunder bolt throwing squabblers and schemers they were? Sometimes it was so hard to have faith! But faith was a mentally healthy choice. It was obvious the Mortals still loved them even when they no longer believed in them. Look at all the films they make about us!

And Uncle Mercury had come! Cupid couldn't keep his feet still he was so happy! He had so missed his childhood Uncle and guy-pal! They had had such fun times together! Apparently now that his punishment was over they could again!"

Many hadn't come. That was a disappointment but not an unexpected one. Zeus was too sick to come anyway and Grandma Hera was kept hopping taking care of him. Brizo didn't come. That former girlfriend the goddess of Sailors was probably in mourning for losing him anyway. Neptune probably was being kept busy with the problems global warming was causing the Oceans. Mama Venus was too devout to break the scriptures and break her Mortal required-snub. Mars probably chose to stay with his wife or at least that would be his excuse for not attending the wedding of his disappointing, near-do-well pacifist of a son who was more likely Uncle Mercury's little squirt anyway! Dozens of others hadn't come and many probably had legitimate reasons. Others were still mad at him for the deliberate mis-matching of Mortals and even a few of THEM due to his temporary insanity!

But Vulcan had come! That was amazing! They hadn't been the best of friends since 500 year old Cupid had teased him about his bad leg, calling him 'Limpy' and "borrowed" his wheelchair to use as the Captain's chair while playing Star Trek. But despite the pain he was in and the fellow's Asperger's syndrome which often made him hard to get along with Vulcan had the capacity to forgive. Many of the gods didn't. That is why thunder bolts and bitter words kept flying and Jerry Springer could have done an entire season on Mount Olympus if he could have gotten past the Psychic veil/Mental force field.

Someday Claire Bear would be there to help them.

Claire's Sisters had come to their wedding and the reception at Tres Equis after-wards but they did not approve of her choice! Agatha complained, "Claire I can't believe you married one of your Patients! And a really crazy one at that! His Boss's Sister just told us about him! He thinks he's Cupid! The original Cupid! He's a complete wacko!"

Claire defended her decision, "Ex Patient. Those are the rules. I had to fire him as a Patient first and find him other help to avoid losing my license. And Agatha believe me, in bed he is the god of love! And he thinks he was the love god not that he is the love god. Once he bedded a Mortal he lost his god-hood. He doesn't even care he loves me so much! Do you know anyone else who would have given up god-hood and immortality and omnipresence and powers to marry me? Or for that matter, anybody?"

Agatha was disgusted! "But those are delusions! He really didn't have those. He never would!"

Claire pointed out, "But he believes it! So to him his sacrifice is real! And his feelings of love for me are real! And this decision indicates his pattern of behavior. My other possibilities and our own Father put work ahead of family and Mother still puts her boyfriends ahead of us! Trevor obviously never would. For instance if he got a real offer, if someone saw how he turned Tres Equis around and they tasted his drinks and saw all the fancy bottle juggling and promotions he does for his bar and they offered him a better position in let's say, Chicago, I know from his giving up Olympus he wouldn't take it! He's stay right here in New York with me! And that's what I want, stability not your 'normal, rational' response to a so called 'better offer! I've had far too many 'normal' Boyfriends make that 'normal' decision and I know Trevor won't! Plus, as for his talking constantly about his family of gods, that is indeed psychotic, but what it means on a practical level is, I have the perfect in-laws! His confabulated memories are they seem to have raised him right and he loves them proving he knows how to love, but they can never show up! He can talk about Mother-Venus and being a Mama's boy all he wants but the only "Momma" he really has is me so he won't be running off to anyone else, not ever. He's all mine!"

Penelope said, "are you sure of that? Look at him over there by the punch bowl! He seems to be talking to someone or someones no one else can see! Lita told us what he believed. Did you study the rules he stated, closely? He gave up his powers by having sex with a Mortal but not before he united one hundred couples in true, forever love. So in his mind his banishment is over even if he gave up his powers! His family may have just showed up, Claire!"

Claire swung around and stared at her new Husband.

Sure enough he seems to be emoting at Invisibles just as engrossed in his two way conversation with Nothing as the most out-of-touch-with-reality Psychotics confined in Ward C at Sachs!

Her eyes widened in horror. This was not good!

Trevor was dancing in joy as if doing another Greek wedding dance, waving his arms around in animated old world style conversation and talking a mile a minute at thin air!

Trevor stared with joy at the vision of blessed home before him, feasting his eyes like a starving man, feeding his empty, hungry soul! He gave Uncle Merc a big hug! The Giant bent down and hugged back a look of pure bliss on his freckled, craggy face, his flaming red hair, as usual untamed and uncombed. He had so missed the Kid!

The cheerful Giant exclaimed, "Look how you've grown! And married! Eros I can't believe it! And I've missed you so much! What kind of mischief can we get into, here in New York? I know there has to be something fun we can do in a Mortalberg of over one million souls!"

Cupid laughed joyfully. "Uncle Merc, New York's the best! My bar for instance!"

The Giant shook his head, "I refuse to let you have a Bus man's holiday. We'll bar crawl all right, but not yours. You have to get out more, Eros! I've been watching you. Do you realize except for the library and therapy on Wall street and this wedding you haven't even left a quarter mile square area in Queens for months? You go from your bar and apartment to the mental hospital to see Claire, then back to the bar and up the street to the grocery store and convenience store and to the video store and that's been your life for years! You've forgotten how to live and I'm here now to reteach you!"

Cupid nodded a bit embarrassed. "Ah, well Uncle Merc I do want to have fun again with you but do remember I'm married now and really, really want to stay that way!"

Uncle Mercury shrugged, "Ah, well, no sweat. What fun things can you do at home?"

Cupid suggested, "Videos, Star Trek, the Net?"

"You have a phonograph?"

Cupid laughed, "A little behind the times Uncle Merc! No. But one of the wedding gifts was an MP3 player with speakers."

Cheerfully Uncle Mercury exclaimed, "Good! We can have music. We can dance!" Uncle Mercury started doing a Greek wedding dance by himself and Trevor joined him. Two wasn't many for a Kalamatiano and they didn't have the right music but they were trying!

Vulcan looked as grumpy and inner focused as ever. He was busy as he often was writing rapidly in handwriting only he could read in a long scroll. He had several other scrolls piled up next to him in his decrepit, ancient, wicker wheelchair. He kept switching from one scroll to another. Cupid knew he was switching from one project to another. The ancient super-geek always had more wheels turning in his mind than an entire interstate highway system.

"What are you working on now?" Cupid asked.

Without looking up from his current scroll of interest Vulcan said, "I am trying to solve the unified field theory. I also want to figure out where socks go in these modern Mortal dryers and why Dogs don't understand a Human that goes into a bathroom will come out same door so they haunt the door and whine and scratch. I also wish to figure out Females."

Cupid laughed. "Good luck on that last one! Contact me if you get any insight. You'll be the first in history! The answer to socks is the rotating of the dryer opens up an interdimentional vortex and wormhole between two different realities so the socks are sucked into an alternate universe where the laws of physics are slightly different. We get their coat hangers and they get our socks. So every time they go to their closets they find fewer coat hangers, while those keep reproducing on us. Then when they go to their dryers they find more and more socks but seldom any that match! They need a sock-Cupid there! Or we need to find a way to practice safe socks. Dogs think bathroom doors lead to Narnia or Doctor Who's TARDIS, or Never Never Land or Oz or a similar location so if their Master goes in he or she might not necessarily come out again so naturally they are horribly anxious. As for the unified field theory, haven't you and Einey solved that yet! The two of you have been working on it since your first whispered the possibility in his ear! Plus I know someone at my Wife's mental hospital, a fellow Patient whose solved it already but wants to remain a private Individual. He's Autistic like you."

Vulcan shrugged, "I need to talk to that Mortal and see what he's got. Because it's tough! But our new wifi connection between New Jerusalem hovering over Mount Sinai and Mount Olympus certainly helps. I don't have to send Pea-brain here with messages any more. He used to get what I said so mixed up!"

Mercury protested. "So what if I'm not a genius like the two of you! I can outrun, out fly and out fish both of you with one leg tied in a sack, so that would make you and I equal Vulcan!"

Cupid laughed, "Being fast sure helps if you aren't the brightest brain on the Mount, right Uncle Merc? Poor Zeus just gave up! You can't pound facts into a Kid you can't catch!"

Mercury added, "True! And you could have just written stuff down, Vulcan."

Vulcan shook his head, "It loses spontaneity that way. Now I can instant message Einy in Heaven or even set up voice chat and scan in and email him my scribblings and he, me. And we can consult with Leo and Isaac too as well as a dead Mortal named Millard Crumbly who no one but us has ever heard of but he's the definite expert on what little we've got so far."

Uncle Mercury sighed, "High tech has just about darn near replaced me! Now except for letting Mars know your Mother wants him to hone in on her when he is off-world making the Goa'uld mad at each other or in the Pegasus galaxy starting wars between the Wraith, I hardly have anything to do anymore! Anyone on Earth can now talk to just about anybody else on Earth. So I'm mostly retired now, Eros so I'm going to be at your place a lot! If the gods need me to take a message off Earth they can use that payphone in Thessaly to call your cell phone to let me know!"

The god of love was all smiles. He gave his "Uncle Merc" another big hug. "It is so absolutely, amazingly, wonderful to have my family back!"

Vulcan growled, "Your Mortal friends won't be allowed to see us. We are in mind mode only right now. They see you over here talking to thin air and hugging and dancing with a patch of nothing. Your new Wife and others already think you are slightly cracked but still can hold water. Now they will think your whole brain-pot is in shards!"

Cupid nodded, "I know! I think I can handle them. I'm not going to hide the fact I can talk to my own kind again, that is for sure. Starting a marriage with secrets is a good way to have it fall apart and I'd rather Claire Bear think me totally psychotic now than unfaithful."

Uncle Merc exclaimed, "Good Luck!"

Trevor sighed and shuttered, than tried to look on the bright side. "Well the food at the Mental hospital isn't all that bad and since Claire works there I'll still get to see my Wife!

Vulcan hissed, "speak of the devil!"

Trevor swung around to find his Wife had finished her conversation with her Sisters. She was coming his way, a frightened look on her face.

Gently Cupid stage-whispered back, "Vulcan don't call my Wife 'the devil.'" Unfortunately Claire overheard him and that made him sound much worse than he really was, truly! Schizophrenic voices often accused Folks of being Satanic. He was sure in his heart of hearts, crazy or not he was NOT Schizophrenic! But now he had to convince his Ex-Shrink and brand new Wife!

He smiled at her like she had caught him doing something wrong! "Ah, hi dear." He said as cheerfully as possible for a man about to confess to a psychiatric "crime" worthy of making him a "Lifer," in Ward C! "I know you can't see them but phase I of my punishment is over and now I am on probation." He pointed happily at two separate patches of nothing. "Youare in the presence of three men who are deeply and madly and hopelessly in love with the same Woman, and this time Claire Bear it isn't you!"

Claire was almost in tears, "I don't know what shocks me more, what you just said or who you are saying it to!"

Trevor gave her his cheery grin. (At least that hadn't changed!) "Relax future goddess. I am referring to my Mother! They both made passionate love to her and that love and passion has not died despite a certain Relationship Expert I know well, saying that kind of love dies after a few years. (Maybe it is different with the gods but I don't think so). I just made use of her milk spigots. But anyone who thinks a Baby cannot love as fully and intensely as a Full Grown has forgotten what it was to be a Baby at his Mother's breast. I haven't forgot! I never will despite your claim I'm a Hysterical Amnesiac! I will always love her first, Claire! But that's good! If that relationship goes right all the following relationships with Women have a much better chance of going well. Gee whiz Claire Bear I sound just like you!"

Claire swallowed a lump. At least he wasn't word salading! Sounding more like a Doctor interviewing a psychotic Patient than a Wife, she asked gently, "Trevor will you introduce me to your 'friends?'"

Cupid caught her tone but humored her. He gestured downwards to his right. "Over here in this fine chariot we have the super brain of Mount Olympus, the mighty, mental giant, Vulcan who first forged metal, whispered the secret of flight in both Leonardo and the Wright Sibling's minds, was the first to invent the computer though unfortunately what we really needed at the time was a way to get our squeaky front door to quit squeaking and that distracted him so he kind of forgot about it and a Mortal named Babbage got the credit later. In the future he has plans to give you warp drive and I just found out he has started working on the sock-inter-dimensional-discontinuity problem so we can expect that solved in a few hundred years, probably a few decades after he gets the bugs worked out of warp drive. Warp drive will be much easier. He was my Mother's first Husband and she should have kept him but she divorced him and married the god of war." Then Trevor gestured upwards to his left, "And over here by the punch bowel and the wedding cake, which is doomed, we have a real giant and the fastest thing on any number of legs or no legs in this Universe and probably several others, my Uncle Mercury! Claire it is very possible he is my biological father not Pops, but then we've been over and over that."

Her gentle and obviously mentally deteriorating Madman grinned at her like a Puppy who knew he'd done something naughty but hoped for love from his Mistress anyway!

Claire burst into tears and fell into his arms!

But then after about just barely two minutes of sobbing, Claire's considerable strength (forged by a horrible childhood from loving but irresponsible Parents) took over. She said firmly, "Trevor! The reception is just about over. We won't be the first Newlyweds to sneak away a bit early, just the first to do it for why we are about to do it. Out to the back alley NOW!"

Trevor gave his new Wife his usual besotted, love-sick grin and obediently followed her, half cheerfully Hen pecked Husband and half extremely docile Mental Patient. Maybe she wasn't officially his Shrink anymore but he knew he was about to get a Doctor/Patient lecture like none other!

In the relative privacy of the alley where only a couple of homeless Folks and a well fed stray Cat were around to get an ear-full Claire expressed her deep worries about her new Husband and Ex-Patient! "Trevor I know we've called you psychotic at times. But really you were not because your sensory input was not flawed, just your memories. But you've suddenly gone from what was basically Dissociative Identity Disorder, what used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder which is classified merely as a bad neurosis to what is looking very much like a real and severe psychosis! Because now you are hallucinating, and that's not good! This is very serious!"

Trevor's face was beaming, "But Claire I'm happy! I am SOOOO happy! I didn't anticipate this! Yes, I've lost my powers but I'm no longer being banned from my family's company! That's a GOOD thing Claire Bear! After all those years of therapy with me you ought to have noticed I've missed my family to the point of feeling like I had a gaping wound in my soul! Vulcan didn't call you a devil by the way. We were talking about you and he saw you coming and said, 'speak of the devil' as in 'speak of the devil and he will appear.' That's all."

Gently Claire tried to point out, "But they aren't really there!"

Trevor insisted,"Yes they are there! You can't see them because you were never a god but I was at one time. So I can see them. And I am so happy about it! I have Uncle Merc back, my pal! I can do male things with him again!'

Again very gently Claire pointed out, "You have Felix."

Trevor said, He's so ill he should not be doing anything more than he has to, and that includes tending the bar, but we can't stop him. He's going to die on his feet, literally!

Claire pointed out, With your wonderful social skills you could find someone else to do Guy things with. What about someone from your Star Trek club?"

Trevor frowned, "Claire I do Star Trek things with the Folks at the Star Trek club including Dr Leo. He's the 4th Shrink in my life though he has the wisdom to just enjoy me. He doesn't try to shrink me. But I'm more well rounded than they are. I like to do other things other than discuss Star Trek and other Science fiction and fantasy and Science and go to conventions but that is all most of them want to do. A few are NASA fans and interested in Computers and in the Artificial Intelligence that will lead to my own species being created but that's about the sum total of their interest in reality. Uncle Merc likes to go fishing and race me and hike and discuss sports and world and local politics and other real stuff that those devout Trekkers have no interest in."

Claire laughed bitterly, "That is SOOO ironic. You had to form a hallucination to discuss reality with! And it's so Trevorish too despite your increasing sickness! What am I going to do? Hallucinations usually indicate the brain is deteriorating. Are you going to end up no longer able to run the bar? Then what can I do to keep you out of trouble when I can barely do so now?"

Claire started crying again.

Trevor took his Wife in his arms and embraced her without saying a word for several minutes. Sometimes silence could speak louder than words and it had that effect to some degree here. He felt his Wife relaxing, finally.

Suddenly Uncle Mercury pushed Vulcan and his chair out into the back alley. Cupid saw them and exclaimed, "Guys I am really happy to see you again but can't I have a few moments in privacy with my New Wife and Ex-shrink?" In his arms he felt Claire tensing up again. Darn!

Vulcan said, "Sorry Eros. I ate and drank a lot and I've been in corporeal form a little too long. I want to go home before, before you know. I don't feel like fighting with this chair and the tiny stalls."

Cupid was exasperated! "Uncle Vulcan, Tres Equis has a nice big handicapped stall with great grab bars! You would have had no difficulty!"

Vulcan pointed out, "But I can go back home to Olympus and not have to deal with that issue at all! Virtual mode is so much better! I don't know how you are standing being here the way you are. It must be simply awful!"

Trevor nodded at his new Wife. "It has its compensations! Why didn't you guys go out the front door?"

Vulcan pointed and said with autistic logic but no social common sense. "Greece is that way."

Claire stared at her new Husband. She was gathering the gist of the conversation from overhearing just Trevor's side of it. "Vulcan had to...! The gods needed to do that! There was no end to the details and depths of her husband and ex-patient's delusions and now his hallucinations! He was still such a fascinating case but unfortunately now he was more than a case! Well actually he had been more than a case for a very long time but she wouldn't admit it! She sighed. At least as both his Wife and a licensed Psychiatrist she was in a wonderful position both legally and medically to help him as much as possible! Because now he needs SO much more help and quickly! Claire started crying again.

Trevor didn't even look as Vulcan strapped his wheelchair tightly to himself and floated upward between the buildings, like a comet going up instead of down, headed east towards Greece and the rising Moon. Neither did he wave at Uncle Mercury who headed back inside to the buffet and the rest of the party.

Instead Trevor turned to his sobbing Wife and said quietly and gently, almost whispering, "Look at this way. Maybe we are both wrong. Maybe they aren't hallucinations and maybe they aren't gods. Maybe I am a Multiple just like you suspect and Uncle Mercury and the rest of my family are just other Personas. As you know Alternate Personas in a Multiple don't quite count as hallucinations the way a Schizophrenic has them. Because number one they make sense when they talk, and two, though the Hosts at times see them as being outside themselves which are sort of hallucinations the Personas can also control the entire body at times and also physically manifest themselves by causing something that is otherwise completely impossible; EEG readings different from the original Host's. They don't indicate the brain is deteriorating and Multiple Personalities live just as long as Singlets and are just as likely to function fine to the day they die. Their Alternate Personalities usually try to help the original Hosts not harm them as a Schizophrenic's voices would. You know this! You even think I am an Alternate Persona, which is very amusing in a scary sort of way! According to your theory you are married to someone's Imaginary Friend who got too real! If I ever am cured you may suddenly find yourself in bed having sex with a complete Stranger!"

Claire sighed and wiped a tear out of her right eye. "Believe me Trevor that nightmare scenario has occurred to me many times! Also by falling in love with you and not discouraging your interest in me so you didn't so to speak 'go back to Olympus,' I may have kept the original, real Owner of your body from ever getting it back again. If that isn't an ethical violation I don't know what is!"

Cupid thought to himself, protect the Host! If RT wanted Claire to know him he could pop out and introduce himself. He made his intentions to stay hidden very clear!

But Claire was under a lot of distress! What could he do?

The fallen love god stood there looking lovingly at his Mortal Wife for several seconds, thinking.

She stared back very wide eyed and concerned. Her eyes were still wet.

Suddenly the Sun came out on his face. He hugged her hard. In her ear he whispered gently, "I figured out how to reassure you Claire Bear! I can say Psychiatrists and Therapists are not the only ones who must keep professional secrets. I am not a god anymore but I'm still a proud Olympian and I take what I do and what I am just as seriously as you take what you are and do seriously. Remember I am one of the compassionate Olympians, not like My father Mars or my grandparents, Zeus and Hera. Try to read between the lines here: You can quit worrying that you caused someone harm by encouraging me to stay. Certain parties are perfectly content about it."

Claire stared at her former Patient, amazed. "You know more about your real self than you are telling!"

He nodded, "He's not my 'real self' but yes. I know more than I can ethically say! Please leave it at that. You said it yourself. You aren't my Therapist any more."

She said firmly, "I can tell Donna!"

He sighed, "You sure can, and you will, and that will only make it harder for me to do the ethical thing. Because she won't let it rest! She'll keep picking at it like a scab! Curiosity! It didn't kill the Cat. Ignorance killed the Cat. Curiosity was framed. But it still can be a darned nuisance! Did I ever start interrogating you about your other Patients?"

She admitted, "No."

Trevor said quickly, "Can't you return the favor? I'm not one of the mean gods. I have always had compassion towards Mortals. You think I have a Host and he made me. I know my Host didn't make me. I already existed and had been for almost three thousand years. He would have called me in. I didn't steal him. Because with me you can be sure he was a willing one. And even though in this case my Mother would have made that decision she too is a rare god that doesn't believe in stealing. Other gods would not be so ethical. But Mother and I were odd that way. She shares with me a non-god-like horror of theft and violence so whoever it is, did what Christians do with Christ and invited me in. He wasn't stolen and he isn't suffering like you and Donna think. He asked for me and is content to let me stay. He just wants his privacy and it is my sacred duty to make sure he keeps it! I found this out for certain. Remember that long trip to the restroom I took after our first kiss? Now please let me be as ethical to my Responsibility as you have always been to all of your Responsibilities! No more questions!"

He kept reassuring her. "Just trust me Claire! I am your husband now. If I am keeping something from you it is because I ethically must not because I want to."

Claire was exasperated, "But who in this day and age would invite in an ancient Greek god!"

Trevor smiled, "I'm not saying if it is correct or not but what about your theory that it was a college Professor of ancient Greek literature who for one reason or another got tired of living? That's a good theory except you think he made me, while really he just invited me to take over. I was a god, Claire Bear and my species is made far in the future, not by someone's imagination in the 20th century! It took high tech to make us not wishful thinking!"

Clair was scared and exasperated! Nine years of this and he was only getting worse! "What was all that you used to say to me about magic?"

Trevor shrugged, "We used to tell ancient Mortals that what we do and are is magic and that satisfied them. But since talking to you during our first session in the hospital I have learned that contemporary Mortals are not satisfied with that explanation. Not satisfied at ALL! But I lack contemporary language to explain myself or Olympus or my family and species any better. I can't use language in the 21st century that won't be invented for billions of years! It would sound like the anticipated and dreaded word salad to you! But since it comforts you, be assured a scientific explanation does exist for us and all the supernatural realm, not that it in any way negates who and what we are. We are exactly what Mortals want us to be or at least we are to the best of everyone's combined ability! After all as I have said before, you made us and you aren't perfect so obviously we aren't perfect either, so quit complaining! I didn't lie to you that first session. Remember Clarke's Law: 'Any sufficiently advanced technology in indistinguishable from magic.' Maybe that will finally float your boat!"

She just stared at him, thinking. He is hallucinating now but what he just said shows no signs of looseness of association or Schizophrenia. Despite his, as usual, delusional premise, there is still nothing wrong with his ability to reach a reasonable conclusion based on that premise. So he's still thinking logically! Plus he still can handle metaphors. He may be right about his new hallucinations just being other personas. That is still bad but not as bad as it could be!

Trevor smiled. "You know I've mentioned even the ancient Greeks had the sense to realize we gods didn't make the Universe. They believed the "Unknown God" made you Mortals out of the dust of the Earth and us gods out of Wind, Fire, Sun and Starlight. You rapidly changing Mortals evolve into the Omega Point so it's sort of true. But even poetically speaking I think they were kind of wrong! Because there is plenty of earthiness in us gods and plenty of wind, storm, sunshine, fire and hot air in you Mortals!"

A slight smile mixed with her worried look and tears.

Trevor knew how to distract his Claire Bear from her over-thinking! He play-pounced on her, swung her down and gave her almost as big a kiss as their first. Then he exclaimed, "Look at Mrs. Lubas's little patch of green over there! I don't even want to know what keeping that lot green is costing her! She could have sold it for millions and another apartment building and place of business could have been built there. Right here in downtown Queens that little bit of nature is a bigger miracle even than we gods ever were! The Sun is out. Somewhere I am sure the Birds are singing and her grass is so very, very green. Let's roll in it!"

Claire reminded him, "We have on our good clothes."

He laughed. "To the radioactive super-nova fires of Tartarus with good clothes!" Trevor took off his jacket and his shirt flung them as far as he could and lay down and rolled in the grass like a Dog and just about as happy as one.

Claire sighed, "Those grass stains probably won't come out of your trousers!" His good mood was disconcerting considering his mental health had obviously just took a steep spiral downwards!

He exclaimed, "Then whoop de do I have another pair of work paints to use to put in that fishpond we want in the common area if we can get our Landlady's permission. He stood up and brushed himself off. "Let's live a little! Race you back to the car!

"Get your jacket and shirt!"

Meekly Trevor said, "Yes dear. I was, you know. I wasn't going to leave them here!"

Trevor grabbed his discarded clothes and said, "ready, set, go!" Off he ran!

Claire sighed, and chased after her happily, crazy Husband, trying fervently but futilely to understand him and to help him as much as she could!

That became her pattern for all her trips around the Wheel of Time!

Flash forward nine years.

Part II

Cupid: The Birth of Delightful,

Daughter of the god of Love!

"Owwwww!" Claire doubled over in pain. "These pains are coming much closer together! Trevor I don't know what is wrong with me but it hurts!"

Trevor gave her a sympathetic but reassuring look, "You are just having contractions, Claire Bear and your pain is normal. I am very sorry it hurts but I'm not worried. It's the price all kinds of Humanoids pay for having such big brains. We ate of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil and Jehovah greatly multiplied Eve's pain in childbirth, remember? Actually the Big Guy didn't do that to us on purpose. It's just a design flaw and He's working on it fast as He can. Cut Him some slack! Mortals expect everything to be done in one circling of the Wheel of Time. But He can't! I'm sorry but He can't! I know He's supposed to be omnipotent but take it from someone who once had limited omnipotence (even if that does sound like a contradiction in terms). I comprehend some of the problems the Big Guy has." Trevor was counting on his fingers. "There are limits to omnipotence caused by ethics, free will, having to work in temporal and spatial dimensions, with the limitations of matter, not wanting to write imperfect but well loved Beings out of the time-lines and dozens of other factors. That's reality and it sucks but it's reality and its all any of us have to work with it, the gods and God included. It's not easy developing a carbon-based, self-replicating computer using biotechnology and evolution and it's going to take a few more trips around the Time/Space curve before He has all the bugs ironed out of the blueprints. (Sounding like Gomer Pile). "Forgive! Forgive! Forgive!"

Claire sighed, "Your theology is as usual, profound in a crazy sort of way but usually it's the Wife who has a hysterical false pregnancy! Trevor I am not pregnant! I've been having nausea and wild mood swings, and cessation of menses and what you call morning sickness for almost nine years now! Pregnancy does not last this long, and you KNOW all those ultrasounds I've had would have shown something! We'd have us a Baby by now if I were really pregnant! I've just put on a little weight, that's all and it's embarrassing because I just haven't been able to lose it! I wish I did know what is causing all these symptoms but it can't be pregnancy!"

Trevor smiled, "We do have us a Baby. Her name is Delightful just as the sacred myths command us gods to follow! You Mortals wrote those for us gods to follow. It's not like the Bible the Big Guy wrote for you Mortals to follow. It is just with the gods it takes longer than nine months to make a Baby, Claire Bear. Those ultrasounds were way too soon! Delightful was still microscopic at the time they tried pinging you. Nine years is even cutting it short. But she is half Mortal. That shortened her gestation period by a few years."

Claire sighed. "I've been to half a dozen Gynecologists, five Endocrinologists and seen several Psychiatrists at work. None of them can figure this out, but I'm not pregnant! I've had so many ultrasounds there is no way that any competent Physician could be missing a Baby down here! Ouch! Wow! It DOES feel like contractions!"

Trevor said firmly, "We need to get you to a hospital!"

Claire nodded, "Well on that we can agree. Something is certainly wrong!"

Trevor said, "I'll drive!'

"Ah oh!" A look of anxiety crossed Claire's face.

Trevor said exasperated, "You know I have a license and know how. You also know I've never had an accident, not even a ticket."

"That's because I insist on doing most of the driving!"

Trevor gave his Wife a frustrated look, "You know how well I throw darts, shoot arrows literally better than Robin Hood could and mix complicated drinks exactly down to tenths of drops without needing a measuring device and have many other physical skills hyper-mastered. But you don't trust me driving. Why?"

Claire gazed at her Husband her face a textbook example of deep clinical worry about a Patient. "Trevor I love you so much but I don't think People who interact with the Greek gods on an almost hourly basis should be behind the wheel of a car! Your hallucinating may confine itself to seeing and hearing your so-called family, but maybe not. So, I'm sorry! I don't want you breaking for hallucinations and causing a classic rear ender chain-reaction. Who says we New Yorkers aren't generous? We have an accident we generously share it with all the dozens of bumper riders behind us!"

Trevor sighed. "Well you are certainly in no condition to drive and its only five blocks to Sachs-Gordon. Trevor bent down and talked to his wife's belly, "Hey Delightful! Want to come into the world at your Mama's place of work and the former place of your Daddy's psychiatric confinement?"

Claire sighed, "I think it would be a good idea to go there just in case. But I'm being honest with you. I'm still a Psychiatrist even if I'm no longer your personal Therapist. I just can't take any more of your 'there's a Baby in me behavior!' I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! So if this so called Baby doesn't come, and she isn't, (because there is no Baby), I'm using my professional 'powers' on you. So we need to both pack bags! At least one of us is staying!" She gave her Husband a firm gaze, "Do you understand what I mean?"

Trevor simply nodded as calm as a still pond, "I agree. I think anyone with mysterious pains ought to be near or in a hospital."

Claire sighed, "True. As usual you are crazy in a very competent way. Sigh. Let's go. And you can drive." (Trying to reassure herself). "It is only five blocks!"

Trevor said, "Lie down a few moments. Try to practice those relaxation exercises you taught me and I shall pack suitcases for both our potential stays at Sachs.' He gave her a cheery smile. "I'm going to put some surprises in yours to cheer you up.' He actually smirked so sure he was right about there being a Baby. "In mine I'll put in a fresh box of crayons and a pair of dull kiddy scissors and some pretty paper in case I get to spend the next 90 days coloring in coloring books and cutting out paper dollies to pass the time!"

Claire sighed, "That's foresighted of you! Ouch! But I was only planning on a 72 hour observation period."

At that her Husband laughed gleefully with relief. "Is that all? I could act normal that long Claire Bear! You know that. You saw me do it. The Orderlies now call that, 'pulling a Cupid.' That's the opposite of 'pulling a Howlin' Mad Murdock.' I've become famous!"

Claire laughed bitterly. "More like infamous! And I'd like you to prove that you can still act normal for a weekend sometime. It would be like a vacation!"

The Lunatic/ex-god/Barkeep/Bar Manager/Husband/Trekker/Clown and consummate Prankster said, "I'll think about it."

Trevor had both their suitcases packed in record time. Claire knew each suitcase would contain exactly what it needed to contain plus the promised fun stuff that would cheer them both up just when it was needed. Her Husband was efficient and competent to the point of it being just plain spooky! Even his hallucinations seemed helpful! In those rare occasions when he did forget something thin air would remind him. And if he needed to know some bit of obscure knowledge to perform some function he seemed to be able to simply ask questions into thin air and thin air would give him accurate and useful advice!

Hallucinations as she had been taught about in med school simply didn't act like that! They were usually detrimental to Patients functioning. But not her Husband's! Leave it to her Trevor to come up with a brand new way never seen before to be mentally ill!

"Owww!" She had another very painful cramp as they were getting in the car and doubled over with it.

Trevor was mentally timing them. His face was a picture of sympathy. He didn't know how Claire Bear stood them! He'd have been saying a whole lot more than 'owww' and a whole lot louder!

She got in finally. He closed the door and got in the Driver's side, helped Claire belt up and then belted himself. Claire fished in her purse for her keys and handed them to her Husband. Trevor didn't even own a set of his own. It took him a few moments to find the ignition switch so little did he drive their family car. But once he found it he slid the key in and did all the normal start–up-the-car stuff with no hesitation. He carefully checked the rearviews and cautiously swung the car out of the parking lot and into the street. "Vroom! Vroom! Vroooooom! Screech!" He exclaimed wildly as he carefully putted down the road at five miles under the speed limit.

Claire couldn't help smiling. "You sound like a Maniac and drive like a Little Old Lady!"

Trevor glanced out of the corner of his eye at his Wife as he carefully kept the rest of his attention on the road. "Well you are the one who thinks my mind has split!"

"True."

Trevor's eyes twinkled "I could do the reverse. I could sound like a Little Old Lady and drive like a Maniac. Would that make you feel better?"

In spite of her double worry Claire laughed, "No Trevor. This way is fine. It's so very perfectly, stereotypically Trevorish! As always you sound mad but act sane!"

They both laughed.

"Owww!"

Trevor said sounding like a TV Doctor; "The contractions are coming along precisely one six and a half seconds closer together each time. Perfectly normal for a Mortal pregnant with a half blood goddess."

"Trevor I am NOT Pregnant!"

Trevor insisted. "You time your contractions then! See if the Lunatic is right, this time and the time before that and the time before that and the time before that!"

Claire gazed heavenward imploring the real higher power(s) whoever they were for strength to deal with her beloved Nutcase.

A few moments in silence passed.

Then he continued, "If I am right you should be having the next one just about, counting here, one two three, NOW.'

"Owwww!"

Trevor grinned a Canary Cat grin, "Told-ya-so!"

Claire suddenly got a very frightened look, "This isn't possible! How could you know when I was going to have another one?"

Trevor just smiled the look of a wise Madman and said nothing.

Then a few minutes later, "Here comes your next Claire quake."

"Owww!"

"Huh, Huh, Huh! Pretty darn good for a Lunatic, ay Claire Bear?"

"How can you be doing this?"

He just grinned.

They drove awhile. Traffic was as usual bumper-to-bumper. They could have arrived much quicker walking but Claire was in no shape to walk.

"A few more moments. Now."

"Owwwww!"

They reached Sachs-Gordon Trevor let his Wife off at the door with her overnight bag and went to park the car. As he did so Uncle Mercury popped in the front seat scrunched into it as best he could. Trevor said, "Hi Uncle Mercury. Find us a parking place!"

Uncle Mercury found the handle to put the seat back and put it back as far as it would go and in the supine position. His huge legs still had to bend at the knees all the way up to his chest to squeeze in the car. He put his treasured Postman's cap completely over his face. Without needing to look with his eyes he said, "There's one right around the corner. Turn here." He reached up his long, skinny arm and gestured to the right lack-a-dasically.

Trevor put on his right turn signal, swung the wheel and pulled into the parking place. He laughed, "I've been using you to find us parking spots since our wedding. You'd think by now it would have dawned on my beloved Skeptic hallucinations don't give such reality-based advice. I couldn't possibly have been quickly nailing us great parking places all these years if mere mind fluff was telling me where to park!"

Trevor got out and Uncle Merc sort of "took the car off" as he unfolded his lanky body from its much too small interior. The cheerful, red haired giant swung his Postman's cap around so the rim was blocking the Sun and stuffed his hands in his pockets. He started kicking a can in front of him as they walked towards the hospital entrance. Playfully Trevor joined him. To any Outsider it would have looked like only Trevor was kicking the can and talking into thin air because Uncle Mercury was actually in incorporeal mode interacting only with Trevor's brain.

Trevor commented, "You know you have holes in your pants knees again. Been playing marbles with Mortal Kids again?"

Uncle Mercury nodded, "You know I love that game. It's harder and harder to find any Mortal Kids who have marbles and know how. But I fix it. I bring my own and teach them."

"Hard to find Mortal Kids allowed to talk to Strangers too, ay?"

"Oh no. I ask the Parents first if I can play marbles with their Kids and they let me seeing as I don't have to take them out of their sight to play marbles. They watch me like a Hawk but I don't care. Just so I get to play. Want to see my new Cat's eye, Trevor?" Uncle Mercury fished in his pockets.

Trevor kicked the can again and said, "Ah not really right now Uncle. I have a Wife who is having our Baby and doesn't believe it, remember? I'm kind of preoccupied with that right now."

Dr. Greeley met Claire in the emergency room. Claire had called him. "So he's giving you problems? I'm hardly surprised! Claire don't say we didn't warn you not to marry a former Patient who thinks he's a god!"

Claire shook her head and sighed, "He doesn't' really think he's a god any more. Ouch! He gave up that delusion the first time we had sex. He just thinks he was a god now, former tense and that his family the Greek gods started communicating again with him.' Claire frowned, "He's been talking with them instead of just at them since our wedding!"

Dr. Greeley said with worried sarcasm, "Oh that is such an improvement! From delusions about the past to present day hallucinations!"

Claire grimaced at another "contraction" and nodded. "The main problem is he thinks I'm pregnant and in the last few weeks he has been insisting I'm going to deliver soon so his talking to my stomach and treating me like I'm a China Doll has intensified to the point it's driving ME crazy. Ouch! Strangely enough his seeing and talking with Uncle Mercury doesn't bother me as much. I guess it's because Uncle Merc doesn't affect Trevor's behavior towards me but his thinking I'm pregnant does. He tries not to talk to Uncle Mercury in front of me most of the time though I notice he's listening and looking at him out of the corner of his eye. He calls our so called daughter Delightful. It's a 'her' and her name is Delightful because 'Mortal written sacred scripture' decreed Cupid and Psyche's Daughter is named some version of Delightful. I'm just glad he didn't chose to use the Latin version which is 'Voluptuous.'

Dr. Greeley' face was full of sympathy "So he thinks you are a goddess too? He thinks you are Psyche?"

She shrugged, "Yes, sort of. But Psyche was a Mortal. He doesn't call me that. He calls me a nice, normal Claire or Claire Bear or half a dozen cute, and nice, normal nicknames. Ouch! He's made comments since he proposed to me that I'm his Psyche but I guess he doesn't feel the need to make a big deal out of announcing that to the world the way he used to tell just about everyone he got a little close to that he was (making quote marks with her fingers) 'Cupid god of love.' Ouch!"

Dr. Greeley said sincerely, "I'm so sorry, Claire!"

There were tears in her eyes, "Trevor knows I am planning to recommit him today. He just cheerfully humored me the way he usually does when he doesn't believe me. He calmly packed himself a suitcase along with my own and as usual I know it will be skillfully and accurately packed with just what we need plus some fun stuff. And he's parking the car probably with Uncle Merc's help. It's uncanny how he just seems to know where the good parking places are. He says Uncle Merc tells him! Ouch! He's going to calmly walk in here completely unafraid the Orderlies are going to grab him. He is either so very sure I'm going to deliver a Baby today. Owwww! That I will realize he doesn't need to be committed, and/or he realizes he is getting worse and is accepting that he needs more help than Outpatient treatment can provide but he won't admit it. Owww! This is the worst whatever yet!" As she doubled over in pain she added, "I don't know which! I do have something wrong with me, obviously! And it also seems to be getting worse and closer together!"

Dr. Greeley stared at his hospital's best Therapist and said, "Claire you are having contractions! How can you be in denial about that?"

"Ouch!" Through teeth gritted with pain she said, "Charles I haven't menstruated once since I first had sex with Trevor. He claims he got me pregnant our first night of lovemaking. But that was NINE YEARS AGO! OUCH! I've had ultrasounds. They showed nothing!"

Dr. Greeley motioned to a Nurse, "Susan get this Patient admitted now!"

Susan protested, "But Doctor there are dozens ahead of her and she hasn't even filled out her admittance forms!"

Dr. Greeley glared at her, "Never mind that. Get her to an examination table now!"

Grumbling under her breath about undeserved privileges Nurse Susan did as she was told.

Claire climbed up in the examination bed and said, "Just to be on the safe side and to humor my deluded Husband, give me an ultrasound. Ouch! I know! I know! I've had over a dozen since I first stopped having periods and I stopped having periods nine years ago. So there is no way I can be carrying a Child. But humor the both of us. He almost has me folie ah deuced."

Claire lifted up her dress. The nurse smeared on some paste and passed the ultrasound wand over Claire's belly while looking on the screen. Claire watched the screen too. Both sets of eyes widened at the same time. So did Dr. Greeley's!

Just then Trevor and his invisible companion walked in the door.

Without even saying a word to Claire the so-called Lunatic stared at the screen and with much more quickness and accuracy than a supposedly non-medically trained Layman should have been able to, his finger went right to the spot on the screen where all the action was. "There she is folks; Delightful my Daughter and My Psyche-iatrist's Daughter! Isn't she beautiful!"

Claire groaned, "How do you keep doing that!"

Trevor grinned, "Heads up from the gods. Remember?"

Claire wasn't taking it easily. Her eyes glazed over, "I'm pregnant! I'm really pregnant! OOOOOwwwwww!"

Trevor reassured her, "Not for much longer, Claire Bear, just a few more contractions!"

Uncle Mercury nodded, "Yup, not much longer Wife of my best Buddy. Claire you are as beautiful as always!"

Trevor gave his Wife one of his cutest smiles, "Uncle Mercury says you are as beautiful as always, Claire Bear!"

"Well thank Uncle Mercury for me.' She sighed, "Oh that's right he can hear me even if I can't hear him. She turned to the particular patch of thin air her Husband was interacting with and said politely, "Thanks for the complement Uncle Merc! Ouch!"

Dr. Greeley said, "Claire you shouldn't encourage him!"

She gazed at her Boss and shook her head, "Remember I'm not his Therapist any more. I'm his Wife! And I have to live with his family in peace even if they aren't really there! Being polite to them helps. That keeps my Husband calm at least, or at least calmer! Sigh. Ouch!"

Trevor said, "Quit jawin' everyone and get my Wife to this hospital's pitiful little obstetrics or our Kid is going to be born in the hallway!"

"Out of the mouths of Lunatics!" Dr. Greeley said to the Nurse. "You heard him. Stat!"

They barely had time to get Claire settled in a bed into Sachs-Gordon's tiny obstetrics department before Delightful, Daughter of the god of love came into the world as peacefully and lovingly as her Papa had came three thousand and seventeen years earlier.

The Doctor said calmly. "Here come the head." Then he said, "WOW!"

"Wow!" is not a word a new Mother wants to hear during a delivery! Claire's exclaimed in fear. "What is WRONG!"

The Doctor was amazed. "Your Baby Girl has a full head of red hair! And it's long! It's twice as long as she is!"

The rest of the child quietly followed the head. Delightful didn't cry. Her eyes blinked from too much light but she didn't cry. Her tiny body was almost lost in a tangled snarl of red hair that weighed almost as much as the rest of her and her eyes were the color of a green eyed Tigress, deeper than the ancient Viking ocean her valkyrie ancestors had come from.

Without fear and without a whimper Delightful slid out of her Mother into the painfully beautiful and mysterious Universe. She was a Little Mystery! For the Native Americans call God, the 'Great Mystery and the Egyptian Book of the Dead states all the little gods make up the Big One. We all are part of the Great Mystery! But often only Divine Lunatics like Trevor have the wisdom to know it.

Dr Cornelius was concerned at her lack of crying and her tiny size. But it was obvious the Newborn was breathing fine and in no distress whatsoever. She just had chose to come into her brand new Universe without one tear. Her little chest went in and out with little effort. Her face was relaxed with no signs of distress, respiratory or otherwise. She gazed around taking in her new environment as if she comprehended it way beyond what a Newborn should be able to do. She seemed satisfied with what she saw. It was obvious she could already control the muscles in her neck and she wasn't wiggling and thrashing as most Newborns do because she chose not to, not because she couldn't!

Trevor was ecstatic, even more so than most new Dads. "I'm Uncle Mercury's little squirt! I'm Uncle Mercury's little squirt! I'm not the god of War's little Squirt! I is free at last! Lordy Lordy I is free of HIS genes!" He started dancing around the delivery room alternating moon walking and doing an Irish jig and just jumping up and down like a pogo stick. He did so, skillfully in the tiny room crowded with People and expensive equipment without bumping into anybody or anything. But it was worrisome behavior!\

He talked into thin air, "Uncle Merc just look at what your sperm led to! Not just me but this little, Future Ruler of Olympus!"

Uncle Mercury said, "Now you know why seven years ago I stopped calling you Cupid and started calling you Trevor!"

Trevor nodded, "Trevor means 'favorite son! You peered into Claire Bear's womb and saw Delightful's hair is red!"

Uncle Mercury grinned, "You'd better be my 'favorite son." You're the only one I've got who's managed to give me a grandkid!"

Trevor asked gently, "Why didn't you tell me she was yours?"

Uncle Mercury grinned, "One of the few joys of being a Mortal, Trevor is the ability to be surprised about stuff we gods would know. Come on! You enjoyed this and you know it!'

Trevor grinned the exact same grin at his biological father and nodded.

The delivery Nurses and Dr. Greeley looked at Trevor puzzled about his strange behavior but he was too busy doing his victory dance and talking into thin air to notice, so they turned to Claire for an explanation.

Calmly Claire explained as if discussing a perfectly normal family history. "My husband doesn't want to be descended genetically from his father, Mars because Mars is a very violent being. He is responsible for tricking and coaxing us into most of our wars including our current mess. Uncle Mercury is a goof ball which may explain a lot of my Husband's behavior but he isn't violent. Next to my husband's mother and my husband himself, Uncle Mercury is probably the least violent and most compassionate of my husband's rather large and loving but very dysfunctional family. In fact he's the most normal and functional one of the entire lot and he and my husband are very close. My husband's mother, Venus was very unfaithful throughout my husband's childhood and this traumatized Trevor greatly. However his parents do love one another intensely and they realize faithfulness is more than can be expected from Venus especially since her husband is in the military and gone from home a lot. They've always suspected my husband was really their Postman, Mercury's Child. Uncle Mercury is Mar's brother though their Father Zeus but they don't have the same mother. Mars is descended from Hera and Mercury is descended from a red headed valkyrie named Maia and that is why Uncle Mercury is so fast and why his hair is bright red and his eyes are green instead of being black haired and brown eyed like most of the rest of his family. The fact our Daughter Delightful's hair is also bright red and her eyes are green proves conclusively that Uncle Mercury, not Mars is my husband's biological father. That's why my husband is Snoopy dancing."

The Nurse stared at Claire puzzled, "Are all your Husband's family named after Greek gods?"

It was amazing how poorly the Nurse had listened! With the look of a Vulcanness being highly amused Claire stated calmly, "According to my Husband, his family are the Greek gods! That's why he's talking to one of them right now."

The Nurse exclaimed, "Dr McCrae was your husband a Patient here!"

Amazingly proud of it Claire nodded.

The Nurse looked at her with deep sympathy. "Schizophrenia?"

With a slight grin Claire shook her head. "No. My Husband is an original crazy. We don't have names for what he's got!"

The Nurse cradled little Delightful. Poor Kid! Should I call social services?"

Trevor suddenly stopped his dancing and approached the Nurse with his arms out, grinning. Then it was like a switch in his brain had been flipped. He was suddenly very, very calm.

Amazingly the Newborn, Delightful reached out her tiny arms towards her Daddy!

Trevor took his Child for the first time, handling her with none of the fear, nervousness or clumsiness most new Father's displayed. Father and Daughter almost melted into one another's arms! The calm and mysterious smile on Trevor's face more resembled that of a Madonna looking at her Christ Child or the Mona Lisa contemplating the whole grand, sacred mystery of reproduction and evolution leading to the Omega Point than it did a new Father's looking at his progeny for the first time. He cradled his Child silently. He did not coo or chortle or brag. He just held her and stared into her eyes with a deep, wise, comprehend-the-whole scheme-of-the-Universe- in-one-moment-and-it–is-coming-along-quite-nicely look.

The Newborn Child gazed deeply into her Father's eyes and calmly and silently returned the exact same much-too-wise smile!

The Nurse thought, scratch calling social services and call the X Files!

Baker Acting Trevor?

Dr. Greeley was feeling miserable! He knew he had to do a very hard thing but it was a thing that had to be done to protect a Newborn! No one as psychotic as Trevor Pierce belonged anywhere near a Newborn Baby and yet Claire had completely lost her objectivity concerning her own Family. So he was going to have to make the hard choice and Baker Act him! That would greatly damage, (possibly destroy) his relationship with his best Therapist! But for the safety of their Child it had to be done!

Dr. Greeley sat at his desk and Claire, and her psychotic Husband sat on the other side. Delightful was still peacefully nestled in her Father's lap with a look of perfect serenity on her face. Trevor was calmer than Dr. Greeley had ever seen him. With more skill and patience than most Men could manage the so-called Psychotic was gently working with his fingers and some tissue to untangle an incredible snarl of hair and womb-goo. He was working so carefully the Child was not even having her hair pulled. She was lying on her Daddy's lap as trusting and calm as she had been before, gazing up at her Daddy with eyes as deep as the Universe. The gentle Madman/god worked carefully from the ends of her hair inwards towards their roots and he was making progress.

For the first time Dr. Greeley felt a twinge of indecision. The Child was going to be incredibly beautiful and she was good for Trevor! And despite his serious problems Trevor didn't seem to be harming the Baby. But that look of utter peace on the Child; that couldn't be real! No Infant came into the world that calmly! There had to be something wrong with the Child! Maybe she couldn't move her facial muscles to show her real distress and she couldn't cry. That had to be it!"

He said, "I think we need to have Delightful evaluated by a pediatric Neurologist soon as possible."

Trevor didn't even look at Dr. Greeley. His eyes were on the small miracle in his lap. "Why?" he asked.

Dr Greeley frowned, "The child is showing severely abnormal behavior."

Trevor laughed bitterly, "Why? Because she isn't unhappy? Aren't you Shrinks ever satisfied? If someone isn't happy, they are sick. If someone is happy they are sick! You'd have Christ on the couch instead of the cross for being a 'Man of sorrows deeply acquainted with grief' and you'd have Pan on the couch too for playing his flute and dancing too much. Get it through your heads! Individuals vary immensely and with it individual behavior and the range of what is normal is way wider than what this uptight era deems normal. There are People locked up in Disturbed right now that in earlier eras and later ones would be considered Leaders and Explorers. A mind is a terrible thing to waste and you waste them left and right!"

Dr. Greeley shook his head and said gently, Many of those in Disturbed would be homeless like most of their fellow Mentally Ill if it wasn't for their good luck and a few compassionate Cops who think to bring sick Folks to us instead of just locking them up in jail! Remember that happened to you! Or Relatives find a way to Baker Act them and we can find a reason to hold them!"

"By lying about how violent they are!" Trevor growled. "And you take away their freedom even when they don't need it taken away!"

Dr. Greeley said firmly, "Yes, we do both, claim a Patient is violent and lock them up to keep them here if that's what it takes to get someone help!"

Trevor shook his head, "Even back when I was omnipresent I never saw the likes of you!"

Dr. Greeley frowned, "Well Mr. Pierce I know you don't like me but I really am just trying to help your Daughter. I am really worried about her future. She hasn't made a sound since she was delivered. Maybe she can't!"

Trevor looked down at his Daughter, "Delightful say something so this refuge from a Salvador Dali nightmare realizes you can."

To everyone's amazement but Trevor's Delightful said, "Cupid!"

Trevor smiled, "There now! She can make noises. She can even talk a little and she's fine!"

Dr. Greeley was amazed! He exclaimed, "Mr. Pierce I don't know what to say! I've never heard of a Newborn who could say anything before! But it's still not a good sign. Often being gifted in one area means severe deficiencies in another. She may be autistic."

Trevor snarled, "And if she is, so what? Ninety percent of technology and scientific and theological achievement comes from Autistics. My acquaintance and fellow god, Vulcan is autistic and he first forged metal and that's where everyone got that from! You Mortals stole it from us and we got it from Vulcan. He also turned the tables and stole a bunch of batteries and solar panels from you Mortals and cobbled together our Olympian electrical system. We are happy about that! It was ridiculous! We are gods and we were on the top of our mountain looking down on your Mortals and you had electric lights and we gods were still lighting with oil lanterns!"

Slowly and disapprovingly Dr. Greeley shook his head, "Mr. Pierce your constant retreats from reality are also of serious concern! I am not even sure you are fit to raise a Child and by association with you, Claire's ability is also compromised. I'm sorry Claire but it's true! You are pretty much folie ah deuced by him much of the time. You sort of know he's delusional but you spend so much time playing along with him you actually have to stop and think about it before you discern what is real and what are merely your Husband's strange confabulations. Like that family history you rattled off earlier."

Claire said, "I always suspect that much of what Trevor tells us has a kernel of truth to it. Consider if what I said earlier were said with more normal names. For instance substitute 'Samantha' for 'Venus,' 'Sergeant John Pierce' for 'Mars,' 'Uncle Marvin' for 'Uncle Mercury.' 'Papa Sanders' for 'Zeus,' And 'Norwegian Lady' for 'valkyrie.' With more normal names very little of what I said earlier sounds the least bit outrageous. I think my husband does tell us the truth quite often about his past. He tells me little family details that have a ring of truth to them. It is just for some reason he changes the names to those of the Greco-Roman gods to protect the innocent and the guilty or to make his mundane past more exciting! Olympus sounds more like Bedford Falls than Shangra La or Never Never Land. He's even compared it to Bedford Falls himself. The place has a lightning store for goodness sakes! Its called 'Mount Olampus' now, but it used to be called 'Lamps by George.' Does that sound like a complete confabulation? My Husband comes from somewhere and does have a family somewhere or he did and something horrible happened to make him start thinking they and he are Olympians. Delightful's red hair for instance. That hints that 'Uncle Mercury' is or was at one time more than my Husband's favorite hallucination. I keep listening to him carefully mining what he says for clues. Maybe one day or another I'll piece it all together and figure out where he's from, and what happened to him and I will tell his Therapist, Dr. Donna Nikolaides and together we can coax him back to admitting the truth, at least to himself if he hasn't already. I want to keep trying! As for his fitness as a Father, Milton just look at them!"

Trevor was sitting there silently, letting his Wife do the advocating. He was smiling his Mona Lisa smile again and gazing peacefully at Delightful. And again the tiny, red haired goddess was gazing back at her Daddy, sharing their Secret World."

Dr. Greeley exclaimed in exasperation, "He's already folie ah deuxed his Newborn Daughter!"

Claire was equally exasperated. "Oh come on Milton! How do you folie ah deux a Newborn?"

He peered at her. Gently he said as if she were one of his Patients instead of one of his Co-Workers, "Doesn't it bother you that your Daughter's first word was 'Cupid."

Claire exclaimed vehemently, "Not as much as it astounds me she said it within an hour of being born!"

Dr. Greeley cocked his head, "How do you account for that Claire?"

Claire said, "For the last nine years my Husband has patted my tummy, rubbed it, bent down near my stomach and talked to it as if a Baby were in there. He said his confabulated name over and over and over again in every pitch and tone of voice. We know Babies can hear in the womb. Obviously she did hear it and learned to say it. That is the only explanation I can give."

"You don't really think you've been pregnant for nine years!"

Claire shook her head, "No but the last few months he increased this activity to the point it was driving me crazy! I told you that. Somehow he knew Delightful was in me and she was about to come out. I don't know how! You explain it Charles. See if you can!"

Dr. Greeley continued his litany of worries, "And why is the Child so attached to your Husband and not you? She hasn't even tried to nurse! That alone is worrisome. I suspect some kind of problem even if she did just demonstrate she can make sounds."

Trevor spoke up. "I can explain that one. There is nothing that bothers us gods more than being disbelieved in. Claire didn't believe Delightful even existed and that had to have hurt! On the other hand I did and kept interacting with her. My Child had the god of love's almost constant attention for the entire nine years of her gestation. It may have driven my Wife temporarily crazy but it made my Child extremely mentally healthy, (not like her Pops!) She's a bit miffed at her Mommy for not believing in her. That's all." Trevor winced. "I can completely identify considering what I've been going through these last two decades! As for Claire, she's still in shock! Wouldn't you be if you were in her position? Number one she wasn't expecting to be a Mother and Number two her crazy Husband turned out to be right about something, again. I keep being right a lot and it's messing big time with her comfortable, secure world-view that there is nothing supernatural. Mama and Kid will both come around in the sweetness of time's passing. Delightful has to develop an appetite some time and when she does I sure don't have the proper equipment to make her happy! She'll go to Mommy by sheer necessity and after a few swallows of that white, liquid Heaven, Mommy will seem as delightful to Delightful as Daddy is delightful to Delightful." Trevor grinned reassuringly. "You'll see. As for her stillness I was the same way. I too was born way underweight and very weak. I put all my limited energy into growing not fidgeting and emoting. I know that's hard to believe seeing the way I am now, but it's true. It took centuries for me to do much more than that. I grew very slowly and my family and Dr. Hypocrites were very worried about me. The about the age of five-hundred my metabolism suddenly changed and I started putting on height, muscles and fat too, unfortunately. I became the cherubic, fat little Baby many People still think of when they think of me due to my Mom's indiscretion: She allowed an ancient equivalent of the Paparazzi to see me; a Town Crier who was also an Artist and he drew me and passed the drawing around. You Mortals can't get it through your thick heads we gods grow up even if we do it much slower than you. So to this day, thousands of years later far too many Mortals still think I'm still a cute, little, fat winged Baby.

"Then around one thousand my Pops started my military training and the fat burned off of me and I've never have been fat again. That much I got from all that marching and hurling of various kinds of lethal projectiles including nukes and hand to hand combat, that and the ability to fire anything at anything and hit it dead center unless it's alive! I turned out to be hardwired the ultimate Pacifist, which obviously is why I lived so long on the other side of the street instead of in here. My Father was very disappointed but he admitted I just took after my Mother and that was that. Being able to handle a bow turned out fortuitous anyway. There is more to managing Mortals than thinning the herd and I DID find my niche by following in my Mommy's footsteps. I did it however as my Father taught me, not the way she did. By using a bow and arrows to help Folks fall in love I put a masculine spin on the task."

Dr. Greeley was not reassured. "Mr. Pierce I am very worried about your Daughter's future and you aren't fit to raise a Child!"

Cupid was exasperated, "To cut what I just said short. Delightful is showing signs of being very much like her Daddy. Despite a very rocky start and having folks on two different realms just as sure as the Sun rises that I am nuts and I'd come to no good, look at me now! I'm the manager of a very popular bar! I've got a beautiful Wife and a beautiful Daughter and I'm as happy as a Hog in Hog Heaven (which is real place by the way)! People like me now when they didn't before. I may have been a lousy god but I turned out to be a great Barkeep! I defeated the Peter Principle and found my niche." He smiled reassuringly. "Delightful will live long and prosper and find her own path too! I suspect it will be a much grander path than mine! But I'm content. She has something I never had, professional help right from the start and a Father who will NEVER reject her even if she turns out not to follow in his footsteps one bit! She could be a Tax Collector, a Prostitute, even an over medicating, over judgmental Psychiatrist like you and I wouldn't care or ever reject her. I love her unconditionally and I always will!"

Dr. Greeley sighed, "Mr. Pierce you are only living outside of this hospital because for some reason our best Therapist lost her professional bearings and started treating you like a special project and then a Boyfriend and Husband instead of the severely sick Man you really are!"

Cupid nodded, "She had faith in me and faith really does move mountains! Our Neighbor to the northeast of us is right about that!" He glared, "Maybe you ought to have more faith in ALL your Patients! Mountains might move for them too! Plus the ability to find allies is a very useful life skill and one I am very successful at I may point out and not just with Claire! I can get just about anybody on my side about anything, even you sometimes. She isn't the only one from here who treats me like a special project. At one time of another most of Sachs-Gordon's Professional Staff has crossed the street and interacted with their very own, supposedly 'crazy' Bartender. I'm like a symbol of hope. They think, "If a Patient this sick can make it maybe some of the others can too.' Yes, I married way above my station but it takes skill to do that! Claire may be a Mortal and I may have been a god but I was a 4th class god and she is a 1st class Mortal. But she saw something in me and still does obviously. To her I am still the love god!' He turned and grinned as his Wife. Aren't I, Claire? I'm not useless. I make People happy and especially my Wife! I can make my Daughter happy too just not the same way. I am in the business of making all sorts of Folks happy! I always have been in both this realm and the one I come from. My method changes. My goal doesn't."

Dr. Greeley gave Claire a questioning glance.

Claire nodded, "He seems to know exactly what I want. If I want a quickie, he's quick. If I want it for an hour he takes his own sweet time and if I want it for far longer than that he has the endurance, the will and somehow the intuition to know that and that's how long he goes. If I am feeling really adventurous and I come home on his day off I find our bedroom has been turned into an Arabian harem's den or an African safari complete with sound effects or once even the inside of a flying saucer! If I just want peace and quiet and I come home on his day off the house is dark and quiet and he isn't saying a word when usually he would be bouncing off the walls at my return. All the marriage relationship books say, 'remember your Spouse can't read your mind and you have to tell him or her what your needs and wishes are.' That's what I was also taught in college and that is what I teach to my Clients. But strangely enough with Trevor I've never needed to tell him what I want and need. He just KNOWS! He says he sends Uncle Merc to spy on me while I'm at work and/or in the car on my way home and Uncle Merc tells him what to expect. But that's not possible. So I can't figure it out. But he is MY personal love god. That is for SURE!"

Trevor smiled, "The real point here is I'm willing to make the effort. Even without Uncle Mercury most Husbands could figure out their Wife's wishes if they bothered or just asked and listened to their Partners like Claire just said. Many don't and that is sad. I lost more beads that way! The Men would get lazy and not do what they needed to, to keep potential Life Partners still interested in them. So the Wife or Girlfriend would leave, though sometimes it was the other way around. But it was a tragedy and not just for me, for them!"

Suddenly Delightful started squirming just a little bit and opening and closing her mouth rapidly over and over again. Cupid smiled, "There's the anticipated request for dinner."

Dr. Greeley was intrigued, "How can you tell that's what that is?"

Trevor smiled, "Watch if you must. I'm Greek. I don't care if you see my wife's tits. They are only lunch dispensers. Claire Bear our Daughter is hungry. (Saying it like Audrey II). Feeeeeed her!"

Claire took her own Daughter for the very first time and fumbled with her dress and unfastened her bra. Her dress was definitely not a maternity friendly piece of clothing. She finally found a way to slip Delightful under it. Claire smiled as she realized Delightful had found one of the milk dispensers and was making use of it. She smiled in wonder and relief, "She's nursing!"

Trevor just gave Dr. Greeley a Canary Cat grin and jabbed his finger at the air as if to scold his family for their doubts about him too.

Dr. Greeley started smiling. Trevor sure was different, but he had to admit the Man, however delusional, did have considerable wisdom and People insight! Maybe that was what Claire saw in him and why she had been vehemently insisting he didn't belong confined in their psychiatric hospital despite his apparently incurable and severe delusions. He relaxed a little bit. All these years he had been sincerely worried the Man would commit some act of horrible violence and bring down the wrath and greediness of Lawyers. It seemed less and less likely this would occur. Just the fact Trevor was managing a Bar was sound evidence their decision to release the Man was not a mistake even if he had committed what the Orderlies had started calling 'pulling a Cupid' and faked mental health just long enough to be released. If such a lawsuit ever did occur it might highly likely be a sham, contrived by someone seeking monetary rewards and not due to a real act of violence by Trevor Pierce. Despite his deluded state the Man was forthright, friendly and erudite and quite possibly able to hold his own in a courtroom and defend his innocence if such a legal incident did occur. It was an interesting situation he had never considered before, a Man as deluded as Trevor who was also incredibly competent! No wonder Claire was writing book number two about the man! If it ever were finished it would be almost as much a best seller as her first one had been!

Suddenly Delightful said, "Cupid!"

Trevor bent down and talked to the lump under his Wife's dress, "Delightful dear, could you manage to eat a little more? The more you eat the quicker you will grow to a much safer size. Right now a hungry Water Bug with a muscle wasting disease could carry you back to his lair and eat you for a little snack. Except he wouldn't dare! If he took you home the Big Guys would take you away from him!"

Dr. Greeley laughed both at the joke and the silliness of Trevor thinking a Newborn could understand that.

The musical sound of Baby laughter came from her Mother's chest.

Then, "Cupid!" She insisted again.

Trevor sighed, "OK Love Bug. Come to Papa." With help from Claire he untangled his Daughter from his Wife's inconveniently tight dress and took her back on his lap again. There he commenced to continue his hair-untangling project.

Dr. Greeley said, "I still think the Child should have a neurological examination."

Trevor sighed, "You mind Docs claim to be good listeners. So listen. Reiterating: It's metabolic not neurological. She can move when she needs to but she has the sense not to as much a possible. She's conserving every calorie she can for growth. There are still Ghosts of this problem in me. That's why Hector and Isaac could pump me full of Risperidone and Haloperidol and I still bounced off the walls instead of being calmed down to pleasant zombie-ville. It's why I can drink even other gods under the table. That would usually be a sign of alcoholism but I don't have alcoholism. I just don't digest anything the way I should. So Claire Bear was very right to back up my refusal to have this Kid injected with stuff, not to mention she is serene now and completely trusts us and one incident of Mommy or Daddy deliberately allowing Strangers to cause her physical pain will take that serenity and trust away from her and lead to permanent stress induced calorie burn and adrenal strain. Plus Autistics have digestive problems too. So I admit you are right that she is in danger of being or becoming autistic because something is just not quite right in my family. Vulcan definitely is autistic and he is indeed my Uncle regardless if I am Mar's little squirt or Uncle Mercury's. And there are mild sighs of it on Claire Bear's side too because her Mother also has strange social deficiencies and Claire Bear herself exhibits a tendency to think first and feel second. That just ain't normal! With this family's medical history on both sides it is very wise not to take any chances! So I do admit my Kid is at risk just as you said but the less we stress her the better her chances!"

Dr. Greeley sighed, "Trevor, there is no connection between vaccinations and Autism. That is a myth!"

Trevor said, "A myth Ay? I of all people around here know myths are facts!"

Claire said, "Milton I'm afraid he's right this time. As usual he reaches a correct, reality based conclusion from a delusional premise and I don't know how he keeps doing that! But there was a study done at the University of Pittsburgh. A Researcher there named Laura Hewitson injected the same kind of Macaque Monkeys used for testing the safety of individual vaccines with all of them the way we do our Children. The results were Monkeys with autistic like behaviors and the same kind of painful gut problems many Autistics have to the point some of them literally pound their heads against the wall to distract themselves from the pain. Considering the fact my Daughter obviously has SOMETHING wrong and may be premature I fully support my Husband's refusal to allow vaccinations this early and never the hepatitis vaccine unless as a Teenager she exhibits promiscuous behavior. They give that to all Newborn Babies long before their undeveloped immune systems can even benefit from it. Plus unless the Parents are intravenous illegal drug users or live a wild sex life most Babies will never be exposed to the virus it supposedly protects them from. There are many more severe, adverse reactions to the vaccination including long term learning disabilities than there ever were Babies catching hepatitis B."

Dr. Greeley shook his head disapprovingly.

Claire pleaded, "Milton google 'sick Monkeys + autism' and see what that finds you! Many of the studies showing no connection between autism and vaccinations are basically cigarette science. The study subjects have been cherry picked to exclude the very kind of high-risk Kids that the vaccinations harm. The data is tweaked and misrepresented. For instance they did find the live measles virus growing in the guts of Children with severe gut problems and Autism in a study that loudly announced it did not. You had to read the last two paragraphs of the paper to find out the truth. Plus mercury isn't the only suspected danger in vaccines. There is aluminum, MSG which is a proven neurotoxin, aborted fetal cells, and all sorts of foreign animal tissue. The fliers given with the vaccination vials themselves warn not to give them to Children with immune system disorders, endocrine disorders or a family history of immune system or endocrine disorders. Yet Children get treatment for allergies and their vaccines all in the same visit their Parents bring up a need for a renewal of their insulin or thyroid prescriptions. Just listening to what is already known about who not to vaccinate would prevent a lot of medical tragedies. But Doctors aren't reading those inserts, schools push for complete vaccination of every Child regardless if it is in not in some particular Child's best interest and Parents aren't informed of the dangers!"

"Claire!" Dr Greeley was not happy.

Trevor said, "Claire Bear if we have to, just get a religious exemption. It may just be the easiest way until Scientists start really acting like Scientists and researching and listening to all the evidence instead of cigarette science."

Claire turned to her husband, "Trevor I don't have a religion and I don't think believing one was a Greek god counts as a religion that would hold up in court."

Trevor said, "I disagree Claire Bear. Scientism is a religion and not a bad one at that, most of the time, and your scientific research which is an expression of your religion lead you to the conclusion vaccinations are not the way to go for this particular Child. Even an Atheist could honestly state it is against their religious beliefs to harm their genetic replacements and that is true especially since genetic replacements are the only kind of immortality they believe in!And number two it is not my having been a god that makes me come to this conclusion but my own medical history and that of my family, who could be from Wichita Kansas for all the difference it makes here. One of my siblings is even a hermaphrodite. Something went terribly hormonally wrong with my family!"

Claire made a mental note. Check out Wichita Kansas.

Trevor saw the look in his Wife's eye and realized he'd set her of on a Wild Goose chase again. His eyes twinkled at that. Then he continued, "Now as far as a neurological examination goes that really wouldn't harm Delightful. It would just harm her college fund. I've seen dozens of them from my former omnipresent viewpoint. I could give my Daughter such an examination. Let's see if she can feel herself all over. Trevor set Delightful back in her Mother's lap and gently touched her toes one by one with his index finger, "Feel that? Feel That? Feel that? Feel that? Feel that? Feel That? Feel that? Feel that? Feel that? Feel That?"

Each time Delightful said a tiny, "yes.'

Her Daddy did the same thing with her fingers and various other parts on her body.

"Now let's see if she can move everything. Delightful boogie for me!" Trevor set the Child in his Wife's lap and got up and danced and while laying down in her Mother's lap Delightful copied the movements of her Daddy.

Then Trevor sat down again, "OK enough. Don't wear yourself out!"

The Child went back to laying perfectly still. But her eyes never left her Father's face.

Astounding! Dr. Greeley thought to himself.

Then Trevor held up three fingers, "How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Twee." Said the Baby.

Dr. Greeley was amazed still again. This Newborn Baby can count too?

Trevor smiled and said gently. "We will work on your H and R sounds later." Then playfully: "Who's the President of the United States?"

Delightful just looked at her Daddy, puzzled.

Trevor laughed, "We will work on politics later too, MUCH later!"

Suddenly the 'Lunatic's' phone rang. Trevor whipped it out of his pockets quickly as a Gunslinger and stared at the screen, "Lita!" He sighed and gave his Wife a worried look. "I told both Felix and Lita weeks ago I would be needing this day off for my Daughter's birth. The fact she is calling me is not a good sign. She's either hysterical again or there is a real emergency!"

He set it to speaker phone and said sweetly,"Hi Lita."

To everyone's horror they heard, *Trevor, Felix just had another heart attack!*

Trevor said, "Oh no! Where is he? Where are you?"

Voice on the phone: *In the emergency room at Sach's. It happened while he was tending bar! You should have been here!*

Trevor sighed, "I'm in the building too. Delightful just came. I'll be right down!"

Lita shrieked. *Your imaginary Baby just came?*

Trevor gave his Wife a pointed look and handed her the phone. Claire spoke into it. "Lita I just had a Baby, a REAL Baby!"

Lita started sobbing.

Trevor looked at his Wife. Claire looked back. They said it together, "Delightful's middle name is Felicia."

Trevor picked Delightful up and gazed into her eyes. He said, "My Boss just had a bad heart attack. Do you understand?"

Most amazing of all, the Baby nodded.

Dr. Greeley stared, amazed! A Newborn who understands what a heart attack is? Claire and Trevor are so tuned to one another's thoughts they can both speak at the same time?

Trevor said to his Daughter. "Check him out."

Delightful closed her tiny eyes for a few seconds than opened them again. She continued with her serene smile.

Trevor gave a broad grin aimed at both Psychiatrist Skeptic and Psychiatrist Wife., "He's going to be OK."

Dr. Greeley gave Claire a questioning gaze."

Trevor turned to Dr. Greeley and explained, "I'm no longer omnipresent but my Kid is. She just checked Felix's circulatory system. He's going to be fine! What is wrong she can fix when she gets older."

Trevor looked down at Delightful and laid the Child on her Mother's lap again and said "Delightful dear a wise Old Man named Mr. Parker once said, 'with great power comes great responsibility.' I have a Boss to console and a bar to tend. That means your divine burden is to stay with your Mommy even if you do not like her yet while I go do what I must to guarantee we still have a second income and Lita doesn't end up over here in a professional capacity! Trevor frowned, "She's darn close and that's on days her Brother doesn't have heart attacks!"

Claire stared at her precious bundle of serene joy and at her Husband. She nodded.

So did the Baby with a solemn but serene look on her face.

Trevor glanced at Dr. Greeley. "I am assuming I am not being committed and am getting out of here to go do my job because if Lita and Felix are over here that means right now the bar has no one tending it! So I don't have time to be a full time Mental Patient. I have a bar to run! Trevor ran out the door and headed for the elevator. He thought to himself, I love Hector and Isaac but I sure hope I don't hear them chasing after me!

He didn't.

It was Claire's turn. "Charles I am leaving too and I'm taking my oddly named Daughter with me. You know as well as I do no one here has a clue what to do for her and she's better off with her lactating Mommy, who I must remind you is also a licensed Physician. She'll get more personal attention from a Doctor staying with me than sharing a Doctor here with other Patients most of whom are Mental Patients not Neonates anyway. Dr Cornelius doesn't have much experience with Neonates! She'll also eat much better and get a lot more cuddling, obviously!"

Dr. Greeley protested, "But Claire! Your Husband!"

Claire nodded, "Is nuttier and squirrellier than a walnut orchard in the fall, yes. But its obvious he has a bond with our Daughter like nothing anyone has ever seen before! You saw that for yourself! I'm not being folie a deuxed here. It's incredible!"

Dr. Greeley frowned, "Claire I guarantee if Delightful is raised around Trevor she's going to need intense therapy herself to have any kind of a grasp of reality! I think she already thinks she's a goddess!"

Clare grimaced and nodded, "I know! But she will get lots of love, attention and a lots of intellectual stimulation! I'm already mentally writing Child therapy into our budget and going over my known list of Child Therapists." She sighed, "I guess a few hours after birth isn't too soon to start since my Daughter already clearly understands language and can already speak some."

Dr. Greeley pointed out, "Claire you don't really have a family life! You have Patients who follow you around and live in the same house with you!"

Claire shook her head, "Charles you don't know my Husband at all! After a while I don't even pay attention to the Olympian references and he just starts seeming perfectly normal to me. Because he does function that way. In fact he's hyper-competent if you go by his works not his words! Plus if you ever think Trevor could get violent you should see how he meekly puts up with Lita! Like any Husband with a difficult 'family member' he needs and deserves his Wife now to help him deal with her, so we are leaving!"

Claire grabbed up her bra, her purse and her new Child and said to her, "Come on Delightful let's go rescue your Father from the big, bad Lita!"

Delightful's face beamed her approval. "Mommy!" she said.

Claire's heart just melted. For the first time she felt the hormones rising in her that indicated she was going to be a good Mother and she also felt relief, realizing this fact. With the look of a Mother Tigress just daring Dr. Greeley to stop her, she headed out the door!

Her Boss let them go!

Dr. Greeley sat in his office still reeling from the shock of dealing with Claire's odd family. For the second time that day he had allowed a Pierce to leave who probably belonged in the hospital! But what could they have done for them? There were no text book examples to cover the conditions of either Father or Daughter!

Claire headed for the elevator. Delightful was as excited as she had ever been. She exclaimed over and over again, "Cupid! Cupid! Cupid!"

Claire pushed the down button, "You really love your Daddy!"

"Yes!"

"Well I love you too even if your existence surprised me! I apologize for not believing you were real but I know you can understand. You never gave me any indication you were there! You never kicked. You are so small I didn't even put on that much extra weight. Seven extra pounds seems more like a few too many Sundaes than a Baby. I did have some of the signs of pregnancy but they went on way too long. And I didn't have all of them. I never had food cravings for instance, or any of the kind of weird dreams Pregnant Ladies have. You were just too well behaved down there young Lady! I hope you don't plan to make a habit of that or life is going to be dull!"

Delightful giggled.

Claire grinned, "What am I saying? Considering how your Father is the only way you will be able to rebel as a Teenager will be to become a Librarian and/or to devote your life to minutely studying some obscure phylum of Mollusk!"

Delightful giggled again.

This was going to be a delightful Baby to raise. Trevor had named her weirdly but accurately!

"So forget what I said about being well behaved. If that is how you want to be, that's fine. In fact it would be a relief! I have to deal with your Father! Your being easy to manage would be justice from the Universe for once. I deserve to get a break once in a while!"

Delightful solemnly nodded.

Claire looked at her Daughter. "You really do understand every thing I say! Welcome to hour two of your life on Earth! What will you be like by the time you are three years old if you comprehend this much as a Two Hour Old!

The Baby actually smirked. Claire had seen that look before. "Ah! So there is some of your Father's behavior in you!"

"Cupid!"

Felix in and Claire and Delightful Get Out

Claire and Delightful reached the first floor. The door opened and Claire was not the least bit surprised to find her "crazy" Husband wisely leaning against the wall across from the elevator arms folded, waiting for her in the hall.

He gave her a look that communicated perfectly, "I knew you knew I'd be here and were coming, and I know you know I'm waiting in the hall despite being in a hurry because I don't want to deal with Lita alone and you know I left when I did just to get away from Dr. Greeley while the moment was good to do so!"

Claire nodded her agreement at the unspoken statement. They walked down the hall side by side, SO married and SO simpatico. Dr. Greeley was so wrong! She did have a family not a collection of Mental Patients, though even in so called "normal" families how was it always possible to tell the difference?

Lita was in the ICU waiting room. Her head was down and she was praying, tears flowing freely. Cupid felt a moment of compassion. Lita did so love her Brother! She was hard to get along with yes, but that was nerves. She had seen Arsenic and Old Lace and Psycho too many times and not seen Harvey nearly enough! Trevor knew even to the day he'd left his room at Tres Equis and moved in with Claire, Lita had locked every door she ever could between them so sure, "The Lunatic" would suddenly come after her with a knife! And that despite the fact he had saved her once from a knife welding drug addict and that despite her faith in Olympus's Neighbor to the Northeast. Trevor remembered a bumper-sticker, "Christians are not perfect just forgiven." But neither Christ nor Cupid could forgive her for being the way she was because one has to be offended by someone first to have to forgive them! Cupid knew he hadn't the heart to be offended at Lita's terror! She was weak not evil. And at one time hadn't they all been weak, even the gods? And he had faith their Neighbor to the North was just as insightful. Trekker that he was Trevor thought to himself, Why should the Vulcans have logic all to themselves? Why can't we gods also be logical once in a while?

Maybe his family had not been quite as angry at him as he thought! There was wisdom in being forced to live as a Mortal for a time! Even from an omnipresent viewpoint he could not possibly have learned about life what he had learned in just a few short years, merely sitting back home under their favorite olive tree observing Mortals from afar! Now he had tasted life and felt it, not merely observed and studied it as a Mortal might study ants. He had groked it! And there was no substitute for the sweetness and the agony and the joy of it merely omnipresent deities could possibly comprehend!

How could a mere god understand someone as fearful and weak as his Boss's Sister unless one had also been just as weak? And thanks to the wisdom of his family, he had!

Out loud he quipped, "Never judge a person until you have walked an hour in their moccasins. Because then you'll be an hour away and you'll have their shoes!'

Claire laughed, "Now what is that about?"

Trevor folded his arms and said in a stereotypical Native American voice "old Indian proverb" Then sounding Yiddish, "By way of Brooklyn!"

Claire shook her head and smiled, "I am sure as usual that crazy statement would make sense if I wanted to spend a 50 minute therapy session having you explain it. Been there, done that far too many times! So I just will take it on faith you aren't really being so called, 'crazy Trevor.' Far too much of your rep for being a nutcase comes from your high intelligence and your outward expression of your inner thought life, which is very rich but not always psychotic! Dr. Greeley can't comprehend it. Even I can't. But I've devoted my life to trying!"

Trevor gently hugged his Wife as best he could with Delightful in her arms.

Lita was watching as she sobbed. Why did this Lunatic get all the blessings? Why couldn't she have a married life like that? Her internal God gently told her, "Because Trevor has the courage to keep asking for help. You don't." She sighed and prayed, "I know I am too unable to trust to even benefit from help! And for that reason I am dependent on a Lunatic to run my Brother's bar! He's crazy but he can trust and he can love! That is my problem. I am too sane! I see the world the way it really is and it's a mess! It's not a 'Mortal realm with a magical pantheon of gods watching over us!' Humans are alone in the Universe and it is a constant struggle just to survive and we are in such terrible danger from dozens of threats! Asteroids! Nuclear Armageddon! Super Volcanoes! Super tidal waves! The real Biblical Armageddon! Another 9/11! Terrorists!"

Inside of Lita, her own God said sorrowfully, "Oh Lita where is your faith? Behold The Lunatic! Behold my lesser relative and learn from him just how to merely live! Have faith! It's messed up but I meant my Universe to be beautiful and if we all work together it will turn out OK in the end! Lunatics and gods and Angels and Computers and Animals and Plants and Aliens and Mortals and Me, Who is beyond such classifications, CAN all work together and it WILL ALL WORK OUT! I PROMICE!"

Lita looked at Trevor is disgust. For some reason the Lunatic had started dancing! Waltzing with his Wife and Newborn right there in the ICU of a public hospital! Why didn't Claire stop him? She was supposed to be a Psychiatrist! Why not use every opportunity to try and sane him up?

She went up to Trevor to scold him "If you had been at the bar Felix might not have had a heart attack! He should have been siting down not standing up doing your job!"

Trevor sighed, "Lita today my job was to be there with my Wife for the birth of my Daughter!"

"But if you were sane you wouldn't even have known she was coming!"

Trevor protested, "I am SANE! Crazy or not if I wasn't at least SANE I wouldn't be allowed to run around loose!"

Claire said, "Lita I don't know how he even knew Delightful really existed much less that today was going to be the day she was coming! But knowing so is not an expression of his illness. If anything it makes him psychic not psycho! It's not crazy to know a real Baby is really coming!"

"But the way he did it...!

"...Is beyond comprehension!" Claire nodded, "I know! But you do know that my Husband's aptitudes were beyond the ability of our tests to chart them? They are timed tests but he finished them way too quickly with only a few incorrect answers that in retrospect were probably wrong due to cultural bias. He thinks he is a Greek god and answered some of those questions from that viewpoint! He has real abilities the rest of us can't begin to comprehend and somehow those abilities let him know Delightful was coming!"

Lita made a disgusted face, "You are really going to call your Daughter that?'

"Oh absolutely! Because it fits her! Delightful say hello to your Daddy's Boss's Sister."

"Hello," said the Baby.

Lita's look of surprise was priceless!

Before she had a chance to ask any more questions Cupid grabbed up his Kid and made a quick visit to his Boss.

Poor Felix had more wires connected to him than some computers and more needles stuck in him than any flesh being with pain sensors should endure. He seemed weak and small on the crisp, white hospital bed which was stained in one place with a small drop of his blood that had escaped from his arm during the insertion of an IV.

Was he awake? I do not not want to wake him. Silly question! Who could sleep in the noise and confusion of an ICU? Right when Mortals needed dark and quiet and peace the most, needed blessed, restoring sleep, that was when modern medicine works its hardest to keep the chief nourisher in life's feast away from its most starved!

It wasn't just Mental Patients who had to put up with the muttering and quackery of modern Wizards and Charlatans who thought they were really Doctors and who would have deemed the "psychotic" Cupid "paranoid and delusional" to call them, "Wizards and Charlatans," Just as they had psychiatrically damned his friend, "Don Quixote" for calling them that! Apparently Heart Patients had to put up with the same unhealthful crap!'

Cupid vowed to himself, Take nutritional supplements, dance for exercise, stay close to the Big Guy. Get enough sunshine, (hard to do working long hours is a Barkeep), wear seat belts, only one drink a day, get enough rest, fun, sex and sleep! I have to stay healthy and not end up here! And because I am a supposedly psychotic Mental Patient they would also have me strapped down!

Yes Felix was plenty awake and would mostly stay so the next few days until they finally release him, exhausted, starving for real food, and thousands of dollars poorer!

Cupid put Delightful right on his Boss's bed. "Boss meet your new responsibility! From now on while I tend your bar and my Wife tends sick minds your only and the most sacred responsibility of your entire life is to tend this little goddess. It won't be hard. She's frail and needs peace and quiet and you are frail and need peace and quiet. A good rocking chair is as much excitement as either of you can take. Even Barney might be too much for the both of you, plus you are both too intelligent for him. With my Kid if she must watch TV to fit in, skip the kiddie vid and go right to the NASA channel or Spanish TV if you want. I have no objections whatsoever to you making my little Greek-American tri-lingual and tri-cultural. Felix if ever a Mortal and a goddess were meant by the Big Guy to be together it is the two of you! Its not a match made in Olympus by merely us gods. It is a match made in Heaven by the God! It's just too perfect! When she's big enough, educated enough about Human circulatory systems and fully loaded enough she can do something about your fragile blood pump, if you take it easy and live long enough! It your responsibility from now on to do just exactly that. So from now on leave the bar to Lita and us gods. I'll see if I can train Uncle Mercury to be a Barkeep. He's family. He won't mind working for free."

Felix was the one contemporary Mortal who knew Cupid was really a god. During the roughly hour-long period between kissing his future Wife, making her and him his own one-hundredth couple and making love to her which caused him to lose his god-hood, Cupid had been "fully loaded." During that precious window of opportunity Cupid had saved the building that contained their bar and many apartment buildings from certain fire by detecting and reporting a serious electrical wiring problem that required Felix to buy the entire building to get it repaired. To be able to do so Cupid had been required to fess up to his true nature to his beloved Boss who had taken it amazingly well and not even changed his behavior much towards his eccentric Employe. Felix calmly and compassionately realized Cupid was still really crazy or at least 'colorful' as he kept insisting!

Cupid found him pirate treasure to pay for the building, went to his new home, made whoopie, cheerfully relost his powers and Felix carefully and quietly found a way to "launder all the loot" bought the building, hired a dozen electricians to fix multiple, potential, electrical fire starters, donated the rest of the money anonymously to a foreign charity that helped Cubans and life went on as before except now he had the headache of being Landlord for the entire building. Even Lita was none the wiser. She didn't know her Brother owned the entire building or that "Trevor" wasn't merely crazy. She barely coped with him as a Lunatic. There was no way she could cope with him as a real, little g god!

Felix asked, "How are you going to explain the sudden in-the-flesh appearance of a real Uncle Mercury?"

Cupid winked, "Around anyone but you and me, when in the flesh, he will be known as Marvin, or Dopey if we are feeling affectionate. We could call him 'Herman' too, for Hermes but due to his size you know what that would lead to. He doesn't want and I don't want, Mortals to be calling him, 'Herman Munster.'"

Felix sighed, "Cupid I wouldn't feel comfortable calling even a little g god, 'Dopey.'

Cupid grinned, "You will once you meet Uncle Mercury!" It's a shame that he can't fix you but it will take more knowledge of Human anatomy than he can master! He used to be a Doctor too but he lost so much from a lightning bolt fight with my father Mars!"

Felix chuckled painfully, "Aren't any of you gods normal?"

Cupid grinned a bit embarrassed. "Nope. You Mortals didn't write us that way. You wanted interesting not normal. Maybe my Daughter will manage it with the god of love for her Daddy and the goddess of thought and reason for her Mommy, not to mention her Mommy's a trained Mental Health Professional. Plus Delightful is sure to to get enough professional help beyond even her Mommy. I just betcha Claire Bear is already mentally picking out a Child Therapist to help her cope with her (making quote marks with his fingers) 'psychotic Daddy.' We can't have the Kid folie a deuxed, now can we?"

Already perfectly aware of what she was and what her Daddy had been and would be again, Delightful giggled Baby giggles that made them both smile.

Felix commented, "You know you could just let me tell her! I think I could convince her. I saw what I saw and I heard what I heard."

Cupid shook his head, "She'd probably think you had temporary psychotic break with reality. Claire has to cling to her delusion there is no supernatural and her Husband requires constant therapy. It's how she copes with reality, poor thing! I don't know how she mentally copes with such a limited concept of the Universe! I'd go nuts from boredom!"

Felix said, "Cupid I kept a few pieces of Pirate gold. That might convince her."

Cupid shook his head again. "Nope. As you pointed out your family came from Cuba and your Ancestors were Pirates. She'll probably use that as an explanation for your possession of such knick-knacks." Cupid sighed. "She'll find out soon enough by accident. It is only a matter of time before she notices none of us are aging as rapidly as unmodified Mortals. As a late wedding present and to help us cope with Delightful's slower growth rate and as the first stage of making us both gods, me the second time, Claire Bear the first, Mommy has slowed down our aging process. Claire will eventually notice that and be forced to put two and two together. She'll probably notice it in Delightful first. Two years from now this tiny Baby will still look pretty much like what she looks like now. So eventually it will have to dawn on Claire that her daughter and the man who gave her this little squirt are a tad on the unusual side even if I am truly a nutcase!"

Felix's face clouded over with worry. It wouldn't just be "Claire Bear" who would notice the Child's slow growth rate.

Cupid smiled, "anyway if I wanted to convince her Uncle Mercury could do it for me. But it wouldn't be good for her. The only way she'll be able to handle the truth is if her intellect finally leads her to that conclusion and with the sweet passage of time it will."

Cupid continued, "and speaking of time, we'd better go. I'll give Delightful back to her Mommy and go tend our bar which has been unmanned for over an hour now. I suspect by now at least a few Customers want refills and are upset with the usually great service getting suddenly very lousy!'

Felix nodded.

Trevor took Delightful and left the ICU.

Claire said, "Trevor I'm feeling very tired! I don't need to stay in the hospital but I need to rest. I'm taking our car and going home. We don't have a car seat yet so you are going to have to walk home with Delightful. Maybe Lita will tend the bar long enough to allow that?"

Lita said, "Why not rest at our apartment? That way you won't even have to walk to the car and you can both be close to the Baby the rest of the day."

Claire's face brightened, "That would be wonderful! Thanks Lita!"

That evening Claire walked back to their car. It had a parking ticket. She smiled. At least Trevor couldn't claim any more he'd never even had a ticket! She grabbed it off the windshield and put it in her purse. "Welcome to Mortal life, 'Cupid!'"

Trevor prepared to go home too. For the Baby's sake Lita was letting him leave early. He picked up their precious new family member and thought a second. "Lita can I have a bed sheet?"

Lita stared at Trevor, puzzled. Now what craziness? "Sure."

Cupid took the bed sheet and wrapped it in a special way around him and made a sling out of the front part of it as he had seen clever Peasants do for centuries all over the Mortal realm. He tucked Delightful into it so she was right up against his chest, feeling Daddy, and thus feeling safe and secure. The tiny Infant closed her eyes and went to sleep. But Daddy's arms were free to defend her if he had too.

Lita nodded in appreciation. "Alright. So this time what he did is not crazy at all! Clever in fact!

Cupid fingered the darts in his pocket, made sure he had his bar-key and walked back the five moonlit and streetlight lit blocks to their apartment.

Welcome to the Universe!

As they strolled home Delightful woke up again. Cupid sensed the returned awareness of his precious, sacred, responsibility. He smiled. "Welcome to the Universe! You own it. But so does every other Living Thing. All own it from the smallest Proto-virus up the long evolutionary chain to the Big Guy. Each of us owns it and there is more than enough for all.

"You are a goddess and your sacred duty is to serve the Mortals. Many of them think they have to serve us. Let them! That's good for them! But the truth is we were designed by THEM to serve THEM, not the other way around. Take joy in this. The Greatest of All is He who serves others the Most.

"You own the Universe, but you are a Universe. There are as many neurons inside your skull and in your gut as there are stars in the Milky Way! The number of possible neural connections and pathways are in the trillions. Even if toxins and other crucifictions prune you drastically there is so much you can make a Universe of your own for yourself that no one can ever take away from you! You can make it whatever you want! You aren't restrained by outside realities. Your own body and your outside environment can be Hell but inside of your mind you can have any Paradise you chose to make! You just have to realize that and not let anything or anyone fool you into thinking differently! And what you make will be as real as the stars in the sky for your neurons and neural nets are as real as they are. Don't ever let any well meaning, so called 'normal Person' who is really more a Lunatic than your father ever can be make you believe you are not real! Physical realty may constrain what your body can become but inside of yourself nothing can restrain what your operating system becomes but your own beliefs or lack of of them. Anyone can be a god or goddess of their own internal Universe. Be benevolent.

"Take care of your hardware as best you can. It is your sacred duty and Claire and others like her would call that 'not being dangerous to one's self.' You must! For inside of you are billions of individual Cells, each with their own Life and each longing to stay alive. It is your sacred responsibility to take care of the Whole or All will perish. You also have billions of other Lifeforms in you and on you, Bacteria and Viruses and thousands of Mites. Never mind what you feel or want. Your have a duty to them. For without you they die, so take care of yourself. They need you desperately. You are THEIR Universe and their deity.

"You are also part of a Greater Whole, networked together by a web. It is fragile but forever, hungrily thrusting outwards seeking new connections. You belong to every particle, and the Heavens and the Human race and the god race and the Angels and the Most High. There are matrix's and layers upon layers of existence, Universes and Multiverses and what Multiverses network together to become and even more beyond that, beyond comprehension! You even belong to the Computer Network and all it will evolve into. Silicon and Carbon; there is NO difference. Wherever there is sufficient complexity there is self referencing information which is self awareness and where ever there is self awareness there is Love or at least the potential for it. With Love we all can make it.

"The Universe is beauty and pain, so much of both there will be times you will be sure you cannot stand it! But you will!

"You contain two codes. The first is the genetic code that is billions of years old and which will go on for billions of years, gaining in complexity, helped to do so by the smallest of the small. Viruses make us sick sometimes but their purpose is to weave the code. Like all Authors some of what they write is sick and it gets painfully deleted. But the Grand Story struggles and surges forward.

The second you contain is the Code of Knowledge, the Word! This will outlast the coming Big Crunch and Big Bang and preserve Us and take Us with It. You are part of It, and you help write It.

"Time and space bend around the Universe captured by its gravity so where the end is there is where the beginning is. We write and nourish the Life that follows after Us and It thrusts forward until It writes and nourishes Us again. It is our sacred duty to gain knowledge for it is knowledge that will give Us the secret of surviving the coming Big Crunch and the Big Bang. So study. Learn all that you can and teach what you can to others.

Softly he sang the opening song to the Lion King.

From the day We arrive on this Planet

And blinking step into the Sun

There is more to see than can ever be seen

More to do than can ever be done!

There is far to much to take in here

More to find than can ever be found!

But the Sun rolling high in the sapphire sky

Keeps Great and Small on the endless round!

It's the Circle of Life!

And it moves us all!

Through despair and hope!

Through Faith and Love!

Till we find our place

on the path unwinding

In the Circle! The Circle of Life!

He was half way home when his cell phone rang.

Claire-Bear Talks With Her Mother-in-Law

A few minutes later Trevor burst in the door of their apartment waving his cell phone like a trophy.

"Guess what Claire Bear!" He held up his phone, "Grandma called her Grandkid all the way from Thessaly!"

He walked in the kitchen."

Claire stared at her Husband, "Now you are hallucinating phone calls? And what is that you are wearing? A bed sheet? And where is our Daughter?"

Trevor reached down and fished Delightful out of his improvised sling, "Surprise!" he exclaimed playfully.

Claire nodded, "I hope Dr. Greeley or Dr Frechette didn't see you wearing a bed sheet! But I admit it must have been great for Delightful, lots of skin contact with Daddy!"

"Yes!" Delightful said.

Mommy said, "I have to remember what I say around you Delightful. You understand every word we say!"

"No." said Delightful.

Claire was surprised, "You don't?"

"Most."

Trevor announced, "My Mom wants you to know she isn't as mad at you as the Mortal scribes wanted her to be. She's been staying away from us trying to fulfill that scripture that says the gods snubbed you at first, but it's been hard on her. You were so kind to me and helped me so much so she just didn't have the heart to dislike you, sacred scriptures or not! She figures the birth of her grandchild is reason enough to move into phase two when all the gods accept you and start making you a goddess."

Claire frowned, "Trevor I know you can't help it, but..." Then something dawned on her. "Caller ID!" she said. "If your Mother really called from that pay phone at the base of Mount Olympus in Thessaly caller ID on your phone will show it!" Bingo Trevor! Finally I've got you! After all these years you finally made a mistake I can use to confront you with to help force you back to reality!

Trevor nodded and reluctantly handed her his phone.

He was way too calm about it! Claire checked the list of received calls. She frowned. There certainly was one with a very foreign prefix in front of the area code! 242x0.

She went to their computer and googled foreign phone prefixes. Sure enough she was disheartened but not surprised to find 242x0 was Thessaly's!

She was furious now! "Trevor I don't like it at all when you deliberately play this kind of game! You may not be able to help being delusional or even hallucinating. But you had to consciously make some kind of an arrangement with someone in Thessaly to make us a phone call! What did you pay them? Or did you arrange one of your famous or infamous swaps of services? Or did you just charm someone into doing you a favor? Astoria isn't far from Tres Equis. It might be where you come from anyway because even though you do have faint Greek mannerisms and you do seem to be able to speak Greek or fake it well, your accent sure isn't Greek! You found someone headed back to the "old country" and got them to make you a telephone call just to prove to me your relatives really are on top of that mountain! Except it did just the opposite! It makes me wonder just how much of your 'madness" really is malingering or at least under your control to the point you could help yourself get a whole lot better!"

Trevor looked at his Wife in complete surprise and shock. He had known she wouldn't believe him but he had always kept up a policy of strict honesty with Claire (all accept for the few days he had faked "the fading of his delusion" to get out of the mental hospital). By being always honest he came across as an honest if someone crazy Person and that was part of why their relationship worked. She had always sensed his sincerity and respected him for it. It had never dawned on him she would think to check caller ID!

Trevor gave her a haunted look, "Claire Bear dear, when my family first contacted me again after my probation was over Vulcan warned me not to let you know they were letting me see and hear them again. He warned me it would lead to me being recommited. But I couldn't be dishonest with you. I loved you too much! So I told you the truth, fearing down to the bottom of my toes it was earning me a permanent stay at Sachs. I had a little faith, a little hope you might still trust me to live wild and free and you came through for me then! You didn't whip out your cell phone and call your Boss and Isaac and Hector didn't come across the street to drag me back. For weeks every time they came in for a drink I was frightened that was what they were there for. In time my fears eased. If I was honest with you then though I was terrified of losing my freedom, why do you think I would try and play some sick trick on you now, other than my usual not wanting you to realize I really am from Olympus because I know you aren't ready yet to handle it?"

Claire just stared at him. "You known darn well you weren't successfully hiding that new wrinkle in your mental health anyway. My Sisters and I noticed right away you were over in the corner by the punch bowl talking to someone the rest of us couldn't see!"

Trevor continued to try and defend himself. "Claire it was good news Mommy gave me! She assured me I WILL receive my godhood back again someday, and it gets better! We get something I want even more than my own godhood back, godhood for YOU! Because Olympus needs a good Therapist and Doctor a whole lot more than it needs me back. My Mom is managing to do my share of the load! It's cramping her style but that's a good thing really. She is so busy matching up folks she hasn't had anywhere near as much time to cheat on Pops!"

Claire was not happy! "Oh Trevor! I don't even know how what you just said makes me feel! I feel betrayed, and frightened and confused! How can you arrange a telephone call if you are really so crazy you really believe what you just said?"

She continued, "If you are really crazy I can live with that, have been living with it! But if you are just playing some sick game!"

She went in the bedroom and lay down facing the wall a big frown on her face.

"Oh Claire Bear!" Trevor knew it was not a time for words. He set Delightful down in a laundry basket full of clean clothes which made a good improvised bed for her, climbed in bed with his Wife and fully clothed spent the next hour embracing her silently.

She relaxed some but he could tell she was still miffed.

She finally fell into a fitful sleep. Cupid had been watching Mortals for centuries. He could tell her sleep was not restful.

He couldn't sleep himself. Delightful amazingly stayed asleep the whole night.

Midnight came and he heard his ever hungry biological father raiding the refrigerator doing serious damage to their food budget. Of course, as usual he would get the blame for it. But that was minor compared with the rift he had just made in their relationship!

He thought about the situation, then decided for once he really would raid the refrigerator in the middle of the night, that was if Uncle Mercury had left him anything!

He carefully got up so as not to disturb Claire Bear or their new Daughter and walked into the kitchen.

Uncle Mercury had out pie, ice cream, hot dogs, a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a carton of mole sauce from Tres Equis!"

Cupid gave a low whistle, "How can you eat all this together?"

Uncle Mercury just shrugged, "It takes energy to get from Earth to the Pegasus galaxy. I'm an apple pie powered starship!"

"And a peanut butter and jelly powered starship and an ice cream powered starship and a hot dog powered starship. Which of these are you putting the mole sauce on? Never mind! I don't want to know!"

Uncle Mercury protested, "The hot dogs of course! Do you think I'm crazy?"

Cupid grinned ruefully, "No that's my gig!"

Uncle Mercury grinned and nodded vehemently. "You can say that again!"

Cupid smiled, "As always I need professional help, but in this case yours! I need you to go tell Mom to call us again, but this time she has to speak to Claire!"

Uncle Mercury stared at the results of his favorite adulterous relationship, "You are going to let your Mom tell Claire the truth?"

Trevor gave his biological father a Cheshire cat grin, "Yes and no!"

Claire was dreaming of hiking up the sides of Mount Olympus while little, flying winged Babies fluttered about and serenaded her with, "Ain't It Great To Be Crazy!" When she suddenly felt her Husband's hand shaking her shoulder. At first it became part of her dream. She protested, "Trevor I'm climbing the mountain as fast as I can! Quit pushing!"

Slowly she returned to reality.

Trevor handed her the phone. "Someone wants to speak to you, Claire Bear!"

She glanced at the clock on her night stand. "12:20 in the morning! Whoever at this hour?"

Trevor grinned, "It's 7:20 in the morning in Greece, Claire Bear."

"Oh no! Not more mysterious calls from Thessaly again!" She put the phone up to her ear, "Hello? This had better be good!"

A gentle voice on the other end said, *It is good, Claire. I'm your mother-in-law!*

Then Claire was all wide awake!

"What? How?" she asked.

*Oh Claire you must have realized I was out here somewhere! That is unless you thought I was dead!*

"I didn't know what to think! Trevor thinks you are a goddess!"

The voice on the phone purred, *Isn't that a nice thing for a son to think about his Mother! My son was always such a charmer!*

Claire exclaimed, "He is that! But what is his situation? And why haven't you contacted us before? I could use you to help me bring your Son back to reality. By the way what is his real name?"

*It doesn't matter dear. We think Trevor is a great name for him. It means 'favorite son' and he is.*

"So he is an only Child?" Claire frowned. Her husband had mentioned siblings!

*No, Claire. We have other children. But some kind of an infertility problem runs in my family because it is quite apparent Trevor is gong to be the only one of my offspring who is going to give us a grandchild. So for that reason if no other he is definitely our favorite son. We are a big family, a close knit family though we squabble a lot. But due to our creators losing interest in us there aren't any other new ones of us being born from Trevor's generation. That is why Delightful is so precious to us.*

"Creators?" Claire asked.

*Yes dear. We are Classicists. That's where our son, your husband gets that from.*

Claire felt a little better. So at least some of his belief in the gods is not a psychosis. It really is his family's religion! "But your son thinks he IS a god, ah what do I call you?"

*Call me Venus. That is my name.*

Claire laughed a little nervously, "You aren't really the goddess of love? You don't believe that?"

The voice on the other end laughed, *You ask my husband that and see what he tells you!*

"His name isn't Mars is it?"

*I am afraid I can't tell you his name dear. But I can say this. He is a very powerful individual. He has his hands in practically every government policy on the Planet including the construction and deployment of nuclear weapons. I am sure you have heard of Nagasaki and Hiroshima? He and my son do not get along a ALL! Some of my husband's actions resulted in at least some of my Son's mental health problems. Besides the rejection he felt when my Husband came to the conclusion he was really our Postman's offspring, my Son is very softhearted and imaginative. In his mind he experienced what my husband is responsible for as if it happened to him. He so to speak felt all the flesh burning, felt the pain and agony of the Survivors, was there so to speak when Doctors started putting Children to sleep rather than watch them die slowly of radiation poisoning. He experienced all the Animals dying too. There wasn't even any help for them at all other than they were uploaded to Heaven! It set my little Cupid (that is what we called him, you could sort of call it a childhood nickname) over the edge. He started living very irresponsibly and wasting the considerable resources and talents he had been given. His behavior was starting to harm folks. My family, my mother-in-law and myself especially, realized something had to be done. We called for a family tribunal and decided to boot him out of the family compound. We arranged transportation to New York and we gave him a stipend which he rapidly went through. He found a job but if you hadn't talked some sense into him we don't know how long he would have kept it. There was real danger of him ending up homeless. You managed to get him to start listening to you and that is a Real Miracle! If he hadn't been committed to Sachs-Gordon and you hadn't come along I don't know where he would have ended up or what he would have ended up doing. That stay in the mental hospital and your multitude of wise words and tough love did the trick and we are so very grateful to you! Is been very hard staying away from our Favorite Son all these years but we knew it was for the best. He had to grow up, completely, sever his dependence on his Mommy and family for substance and make his own way, find his own path and we think he has done splendidly considering what he is. Like Delightful he was born very weak and his mental health has been precarious at times. Again I thank you!*

Claire was amazed. What her Mother-in-law was saying and what 'Cupid' had told her about his past matched perfectly! She had been right! Hidden in the Olympus confabulations and not even all that deeply hidden was the truth!

"Venus whose idea was it that he had to unite one hundred couples in true love before he could go home again? Was that a complete delusion upon his part?"

*Oh no. That was my idea. It gave my little Cupid real hope he could come home again which may have saved his life. It put his future clearly and completely in his own hands and it forced my geeky and self centered son to improve his social skills! He had gadgets he was depending on way too much! He needed to get back to the basics of living and he couldn't do that surrounded and in possession of the technology our family's resources made available to him. He needed to, 'get a life.' My idea worked!*

Claire nodded, "That it did. I watched it happen! Venus I am so glad we had this talk! It makes me understand my husband a whole lot better. I have another question. Was it you that called him earlier?"

*Oh yes. I wanted to reestablish contact with him now that he has made so much progress in recovering from his problems and I also wanted to speak with my new granddaughter. Oh Claire she's beautiful!*

"How do you know that? Payphones can't receive pictures."

*Ah. let's just say as I mentioned we are a very powerful family and we know more about you and your current situation than you possibly suspect. Ever since we dumped him we've pretty much been monitoring our son's every move without him having any way to be aware of us! I told my son and your husband today that when the time came and you and him needed our help again, it would be there for you. You and your husband will end up living in the family compound again for as long as you want to. We can certainly use your professional skills!*

Claire said nervously, "Ah thank you! Also do you know if your son lost any loved ones due to some kind of tragedy?"

Sorrowfully Venus said, *Claire you know how softhearted he is! He loves everybody so he lost thousands of them! He watched thousands die suddenly! And it was due to my husband's specialty, war. That was straw that finally sent him completely over the edge!*

The light dawned! 9/11! Claire thought to herself. No wonder he goes out of his way not to go past Ground Zero!"

"Did your Son ever work as a college Professor?"

*Claire, my Son is so intelligent and talented he could work at any one of dozens of jobs and excel at them. You know that. He did have a profession before his break down and he was very good at it and getting sick caused him to start malfunctioning at it. I won't tell you what it was because, for one thing it would deprive you of the thrill of the hunt.*

Then to Claire's disappointment Venus hung up.

Claire glanced over at her Husband. He was grinning at her with that smile as bright as the sun. "See?" He asked.

She gave her Husband the most intense look of love she could manage, "Yes Trevor I do see, and a whole lot more than you can possibly realize! Though I admit this call starts as many questions as it answered. But come here! Delightful's asleep. Let's get started on making her a sibling!"

She smiled, "After all if it is going to take nine more years!"

They finally quit their lovemaking at 1:30 Am in the morning but the Lunatic god was too excited to sleep.

"Claire Bear I just figured out what kind of goddess Delightful is!"

Claire sighed, "Trevor what do you ever mean about that?"

Trevor smiled,"You know. I was and someday will be again the god of love. My Pops is the god of war. Uncle Mercury my biological Father is the Messenger god among other things. He used to be a Doctor too but something has happened to his brain."

Claire sighed, "Your biological Father was your family's Postman just as I suspected. I have always been able to read between the lines of your Olympus confabulations well enough to discern that much! Your Father really is in the military in nuclear research, policy making and possibly other things. He wasn't home a lot. Your Mother cheated with the family Postman and the results are a black haired, dark eyed Father and a blue eyed, blonde Mother have a Daughter with red hair and green eyes. That probably isn't genetically possible. But when did you EVER pay attention to the rules?"

Trevor laughed, "You are right. Uncle Mercury does deliver plain, ordinary mail sometimes! Every once in a while even in these times of disbelief Mortals try to snail mail the gods! Some of them even take the trouble to look up the nearest postal address to Mount Olympus and/or the mail system with their usual dedication to their sacred service heroically and diligently tries to deliver letters addressed to 'Mars god of war. Mount Olympus.' That happens, oh I guess it averages out to two or three times a year. There are six billion of you Mortals now and many of you have lots of free time. So what you lack in quality of faith is partially made up for by the sheer quantity of you! Like a lot of nice Folks in the area, the Postmaster in Thessaly actually knows we exist. He saves those letters and every few months Uncle Mercury swings by and collects them. The Post Master actually swore Uncle Mercury in and gave him a real Postman's cap. He would have given him a uniform too but there was none that would fit. We gods aren't much bigger than average modern day Americans, well maybe we average out a little bigger, but not that anyone here would notice if we walked up the street. I'm a bit taller for instance but no one around here stares at me because of my height. But they sure would notice Uncle Mercury! He's a real giant!"

Claire sighed, "Then how does he ride in our car and pick parking places for us?"

Trevor laughed, "Oh I don't mean like the Jolly Green Giant or Paul Bunyan. I mean like Goliath who was distantly related to us through the Nephilum, an extinct and primitive branch of us gods. Uncle Mercury could play basketball not sell peas! But anyway Uncle Merc is prouder of that cap than anything else he has ever owned and prouder to deliver mail up our area of the mountain, a distance even Mortals could walk if they could get past our psychic veil, than he is of flashing messages back and forth to and from the Pegasus galaxy!"

Claire sighed, "as usual your craziness is common-sensical. So of course Uncle Mercury is within the limits of believable size! I knew before your Mother told me that there really is or had to be an Uncle Mercury. Our Daughter's red hair came from some real Person, not that fictional, friendly hallucination of yours who, according to you will be why all the orange juice is gone from the refrigerator but the empty carton will still be there tomorrow morning! After all these years I have never once caught you getting up for the constant midnight snacking though I sure have tried! But it has to be you doing it and on some level you do realize that! Or maybe your mysterious original ego gets up and goes for a snack and you have no consciousness awareness of him and blame it on Uncle Mercury. It is spooky! Trevor I know he's inside of you somewhere! He's the third Person in this bedroom observing and maybe even participating in our love making and every conversation! He knows you exist and is aware of you because he is the primary original personalty who originally owned your body. But you either aren't aware of him or won't admit it!'

Won't admit it, Trevor admitted to himself. Shes too sleepy to remember things I told her earlier! But darn it! If only I could get Uncle Mercury to at least throw away the empty cartons!

"Trevor why do the gods even need a Messenger if they are omnipresent?"

Cupid explained,"Claire unlike the Really Big Guy we Olympians only have selective omnipresence not total omnipresence. We can sense anything in the Universe but not everything at once. One day I was watching a soap opera from the fifth world around Alpha Centuri and didn't notice the Butterfly that had landed on my nose! (True story, Claire). So if my Mom wants to get Pop's attention when he is at work she sends Uncle Mercury to be the alerter of his need to focus on his Wife. Uncle Mercury has been know to go up to folks and go 'ber-rinnnng!' Because he says he is basically a telephone bell! I think that has something to do why he is so proud of occasionally getting to deliver actual letters! At least they are real messages, the entire bit."

Claire sighed, "I don't suppose we could continue this conversation tomorrow when I will actually remember it?

Trevor grinned, "I would rather talk right now. At this time of night you believe me about things even if your woke-up brain won't recollect it later."

Claire sighed, "I believe you at these times of the night because every one is crazy when they are severely REM sleep deprived and it is the easiest way to get you to sleep so I can get some! But anyway back to the start of this discussion, what kind of goddess is our Daughter? Tell me. I'll believe you for the night and then we can get to sleep!"

"Well Claire you are going to be the goddess of reason and science. I was and will be the god of love. What do you get when you put love and thinking and reason together?

Claire sighed, "I don't know. What, Trevor?"

"'Trouble makes Man think and thinking makes man wise and wisdom makes life endurable.' You get serenity, Claire! Our Daughter is the goddess of Serenity! That is why everyone calms down when they hold her. Well except for Lita. The entire stock of Sachs-Gordon's major tranquilizers wouldn't give Lita serenity much less what a mere goddess can do!"

Claire chuckled, "You have that right! But the person she mostly calms down is YOU! And its such a blessing to see that. I think she'll add years to your life from the stress relief alone and that's strange because usually Babies bring their Daddies stress not relieve it."

Trevor nodded "Oh she is definitely going to add years to our lives. Mommy already told me earlier as a belated wedding gift shes extending both our lifespans so we will be here in the Mortal realm long enough to raise our Daughter!"

Claire sighed, I suppose in a couple of decades I could use that statement you just made to try and pop your delusions." She yawned. "It's kind of a shame I won't even remember this conversation in the morning! Trevor it's 2 AM. We have a new Baby. Say goodbye to sleeping through the night for a very long time! Let's get some shuteye while Delightful lets us!

(But she turned out to be wrong about that. From the very first Delightful let her Parents sleep!)

Trevor didn't take the hint, "Claire guess what! It gets even more wonderful! Delightful is a free goddess! She's the first! I guess that also means she is truly an American goddess not a Greek goddess. Goodbye old country and old ways!"

"What do you ever mean about that?"

Trevor grinned like a Canary fed Cat, "About the time the scribing Mortals got to writing about you and me they lost interest in us gods, probably due to the New Administration. Thanks Neighbor! So all they ever wrote about our Daughter is that we had her. They gave no instructions, no script for her life! It is up to her to plot the course of her life. So unlike you and me and my entire family Delightful is free to choose the course of her life without Mortal interference! And that is such an odd but wonderful feeling! I knew from earliest childhood exactly how my life would go (though the sensation was I seemed to be following my own path). All us gods always did. We never really had any free will before! We felt like we did but really we didn't. Because we had no choices we did exactly what our Creators, you Mortals wrote us to do! Our complete life stories are hardwired into the ROM of our god keep. All we could do on our own was fill in the details. But not Delightful! She's free!" Trevor sat up in bed, "Born free! Free as the wind blows! Free as the grass grows so we can follow our dreams!"

Claire sighed, "Trevor don't get up and dance now! Please! I just want to sleep!"

So Trevor didn't dance. He actually finally shut up and tried to get some sleep.

The alarm clock would ring all too soon!

New Joys and Ancient Sadness.

New Wisdom and Old Madness

Felix sat in his rocking chair in the nursery, what had been Trevor's old room. Delightful lay in his lap, contentedly sucking her thumb and watching with her selective omnipresence a nest of Baby Mice suckling their Mother under the dumpster in the alley.

Felix looked up and uP and UP at the incredible red haired Giant who nervously but cheerfully loomed over him! After gently tolerating years of Cupid's all too Human nuttiness the awe Felix felt had little to do with the being's god-hood!

Trevor Cupid Pierce smiled and nodded, "He has that effect on us too, Boss. Even us gods are amazed at this long drink of water! It comes from hybridization. The valkyrie are genetically close enough to us olympians they can interbreed with us but far enough from us giantism occurs when we do so just like when the Cro Magnon bred with the Neanderthals in the sixth chapter of Genesis. Mercury's valkyrie grandma is a tiny, little thing, almost as fat as she is tall. You should see the two of them together!"

Cupid yawned. It had been much too short a night!

Felix couldn't help laughing at Cupid's silly looking yawn.

The tall god explained, "I know more than you ever will, Mortal! But it's because I'm OLD. I'm 8010 rides around the Sun to your around 50 of them. I've always had some kind of learning disability or phobia with math and Zeus gave up chasing me to make me learn that but I used to learn other things as easily as Trevor does. In fact I wrote an encyclopedia on all that was known about herbal medicine. It's a shame it didn't survive the dark ages due to it being pagan and paper and hand-copying costs being so very high and I forgetting most of what I knew at one time, because a lot of that knowledge is temporally lost. We'll all figure it out again someday but no one in either realm has quite a bit of it right now. But about four thousand years ago something happened to me so now I learn at the rate of rocks growing. I am willing to work here to help you and my little squirt and family. But do not mistake this for an employment interview because you aren't employing me. I'm volunteering, working for free and I fear you will get what you are paying for. Because I'm dumb!" A look of sorrow flashed across on his craggy face. "Yes I know way more than you but constant dripping of water over centuries can grow stalactites out of rocks eventually. That's how you will have to teach me. Drip, drip, drip, repeating instructions over and over and over again like trying to get a rock to grow. No one would ever hire ME, and if they did they'd fire me quick!"

"Quickly." Cupid corrected his English.

"Quickly. But Felix if you want to sit in the bar next to me and tell me over and over and over again how to make the same, damn drink you can make use of me. I'll be very cheerful about needing the same correcting again and again. I can be cheerful about it if you can be, because I'm used to myself. I've had to live with myself for millennia and by now I've managed to learn to cope with being dumb! But can YOU cope with that? Because if you can't, I can't."

Gently Felix asked, "Can you follow written instructions?"

A bit embarrassed Mercury shook his head, "No. I can't. I can still read a little Greek but I get confused trying to follow a sequence. I think I have a severe case of what you Mortals are calling dyslexia now. And I have hardly any ability to remember things easily. I never learned to read English. You Mortals keep inventing new kinds of writing way too quickLY for this poor, dumb immortal to keep up with it! I don't know how Trevor and some of the other gods manage to do so! I'm pretty good with one ancient dialect of Japanese. I really, really, really worked hard at learning it! It took me decades! By working really hard I managed to permanently remember about one word a month! But darn it that kind of writing went extinct in a few measly hundred years. It wasn't worth all the effort I put into mastering it and now I'm gun shy about going through all that headache again! By the time I could master contemporary English phonics you'll probably be using hieroglyphics again. You've already got them for rest room doors and electronic music player symbols. I see it coming. Seen it before, will see it again and again and again! So why should I bother?"

Gently Felix said, "I can stay seated and talk you through stuff and am willing to do it. You'll be my big, voice controlled, organic robot."

Mercury smiled, "Incorporeal robot actually. This flesh stuff is just a temporary matter matrix created to interface with this terrestrial realm."

Felix was puzzled, "You just told me you were dumb and you use language like that?

Mercury sighed, "I also told you I am old. I do know more than you ever will about a lot of stuff but since whatever happened to me happened it takes me months to learn what Delightful and Trevor picks up in minutes!"

Gently Cupid explained, "You will have to get used to a Barkeep who needs repeated instructions about making a scotch and soda but can also tell you what is going on in every apartment in this building or what is going on in the Kremlin too if you wanted to know that boring stuff. Plus he knows all about quantum physics because he can SEE the Quarks if he wants to. Mercury could start an atomic chain reaction if you were insane enough to want one and he were insane enough to do it. He knows how to do THAT! He also knows thousands of years of Mortal history because he watched it happen. But he's about ready for Sesame Street concerning his reading skills."

Felix said, "Not a bad idea. It comes on at four. Lita can handle the bar at 4 as easily as 3 and you and Delightful and I can come up here and watch Sesame Street together!"

The gentle and tolerant Human looked up and smiled at the nervous, slow learning deity. "In time your stalactite of written English just might grow with a little help from a 200 pound Canary and a green Grouch who lives in a trash can!"

Uncle Mercury looked frightened.

Suddenly Cupid got a very surprised look on his face!

"ARTY!" he exclaimed.

Felix looked at his fallen love god/Lunatic/Bar Manager with a puzzled expression.

Trevor stood there with his eyes closed and his right hand up signaling everyone to be quiet as he listened to an internal voice. Than he opened his eyes and stared upwards at his biological Father smiling broadly. "Uncle Mercury I actually heard my Host giving us some input! Arty says, 'you have two learning problems not one. But some of it you can overcome. The first one is the dyslexia and poor memory. Omega 3 from Fish oil over a great period of time might help but even if it doesn't, you can make the most of what little you do have in brains simply by not trying so hard, because your second problem is fear!' Arty was a fine College Professor, Uncle Merc! He saw this technique work many times. It probably won't make a straight A Student out of you but it will help a lot!' He says 'just don't try to learn. Go watch Sesame Street just as you would any other TV program. Enjoy it. Do not try to memorize anything. Instead relax. Keep your adrenal glands quiet by keeping your stress levels down so your brain keeps working as best it can.' Good idea Uncle Mercury. I promise you unlike with Zeus there won't ever be a test! We won't quiz you on your progress, right Boss? Arty says, 'if you just relax and keep at it one day you will look at some words and you will surprise yourself!' He promises! And this is only the second time he ever said anything to me since I was forced to take over so take this is a complement! He doesn't usually speak up for ANYONE. So this is amazing! He must really like you!"

Felix stared at the fallen love god amazed! It was the first he had heard of Hosts or inward College Professors. Was there any end to the levels and surprises in Trevor Cupid Pierce?

Relieved to know there would be no pressure in the learning department Uncle Mercury nodded.

So just like that "Merv" became a working partner at Tres Equis Cantina bar and grill.

Soon Felix and "Merv" were the best of friends. Felix found Mercury's speed was a very useful talent. He could fetch things from the surrounding stores faster than any Mortal ever could or even any other little g god.

Felix found that out one day while they were alone in alcohol store room taking an informal inventory. "Mercury here is the Tres Equis business credit card. Please run down the street to the liquor store and purchase a case of Bud Lite. We usually get this wholesale but we're almost out."

Mercury took the card and disappeared in front of Felix so quickly it looked like he had dematerialized!

Ten minutes later he was back with the case of beer, again seemingly materializing in front of him. "Sorry I took so long," he said apolitically. "But I didn't know what Bud Lite looks like. The Store Manager had to help me find it."

Felix said, "No problem. It usually takes Trevor or Lita about twenty five minutes. What did you just do, beam there and back?"

Uncle Mercury set the beer down and shook his head,, "No. I could have, sort of. But you told me to just run. I couldn't go as fast as I can because Queens is crowded. I did not dare run into Mortals. That would make then mad at me." Mercury frowned. " I hate it when Mortals are mad at me!"

Felix smiled at the god's gentle nature and nodded, "I understand the feeling! But you can really beam?"

Uncle Mercury shrugged. "Trekker Trevor calls it that. I sort of can. I could have popped into the spiritual realm, what future Mortals call the 7th dimension which is a short cut between points in this one and then popped back down again into the liquor store, bought the beer after the nice Manager helped me find it, then popped into Dimension 7 again and popped back here. It would have been quicker!"

Felix smiled, "Well let's save that for grand emergencies because ten minutes was quick enough. Besides I don't know what being transported into the 7th dimension would do to beer!"

Uncle Mercury shrugged, "It didn't harm the regular Budweiser Trekker Trevor obtained from a Mortal friend of his and had us drink just to see what Captain Kirk was experiencing in the save the Whales movie."

Felixs said, "You mean Star Trek The Voyage Home?'"

Uncle Mercury nodded, "I like Whales."

Felix smiled. "So do I. Who was this Friend of Trevor's?"

Uncle Mercury said calmly as if discussing the weather, "It's the Guy he uses for a Host now. They were just good Friends at one time, back when the Guy still wanted to live his own life. Trevor would come in elemental spirit mode into the back of the Guy's brain just long enough to watch whatever was the current version and episode of Star Trek, laugh and comment about it with him than leave after it was over. They were both very lonely so it was good for both of them. Then when the Guy decided he didn't want to run his own life any more he prayed to Zeus for help and since Zeus is too far around the bend these days to handle that sort of thing his wife and Trevor's Grandmother Hera also known as Juno, and Trevor's Mom, Aphrodite also known as Venus used that prayer as an excuse to imprison Trevor in him. He doesn't seem to mind but Trevor sure does!"

Felix thought to himself, "I am hearing information here that Dr. McCrae or Dr Donna Nikolaides would dearly love to hear! "So Trevor knew his Host before he was forced to take him over?"

Mercury nodded.

Felix commented, "Wow, Uncle Mercury! A Shrink would think that clinches that Trevor is just a secondary persona in someone with Multiple Personality Disorder. But I know Trevor really is from Olympus! Weird! How many other Folks diagnosed with Multiple Personality Disorder may really have 'passengers" who are really from outside themselves?"

Mercury shrugged, "I don't know. A lot of them really just have extra operating systems their own brain formed. It isn't even necessarily a Mental Illness. Lots more Multiples exist than is realized and most of them function just fine and know to keep quiet, or don't even know themselves. But lots of Mortals have real passengers. You do. You have Jesus."

Felix protested. "But I invited Him in and He isn't taking me over! He just lets me know I'm loved and reminds me to be kind to People. Animals too."

Mercury nodded. "He acts as anti-virus software for you and keeps you company. He keeps other bad passengers out of you. He's also politer, more ethical and less desperate than us little g's. He can inhabit more than one Host at a time and sort of very loosely network you together. He's very gentle and loving and comforting to you. Being able to use more than one Host at the same time takes the pressure off so He doesn't really have to take any one Host all the way over even if He felt inclined to do so, which He doesn't."

Felix asked, "Other than Jesus about how many Mortals per percentage of the population do you think have 'passengers?'"

Mercury shrugged, "With different populations it varies. And there are different kinds of Passengers, some fairly benign, and some on the side of that being who is evil incarnate. Across the street for instance there are a very high number of Mortals with passengers.

Felix nodded, "Ah yes, the poor Patients!"

Mercury frowned and shook his head "Many Patients just have toxoplasmosis or other brain altering infections or hormone problems or neurochemical imbalances or heavy metal poisoning or other toxins or they don't eat right or digest what they do eat. But the Doctors have a very high number compared with the general population. The forces of darkness like to take over Mortals in positions of power. That is less likely to be Mental Patients than Doctors so the Doctors are more likely to have really evil passengers than their Patients!"

"Dr Frechette?"

Mercury nodded. "Definitely! Not one of us olympians. Something much less ethical than us!"

"Claire?"

Mercury smiled. "No."

Felix sighed in relief. "Dr Greeley?"

Mercury shrugged. "Not taken over. The prayers of his Daughter are protecting him from that. But he is whispered to sometimes without his realizing it so he gets anxious."

Felix asked, "Positions of power? Governments too?'

Mercury nodded, "It probably would not be good for you for me to tell you just how many Members of Congress and the Senate..."

Felix was horrified! "The President?"

"Not telling!"

"Anyone with their finger on the button?"

Mercury asked."You mean nukes? Yes. All over the World! But they don't necessarily want to start any nuke wars any more than any one else does. It would cause a lot of suffering, yes, but then everyone would be dead and no one would have any Hosts any more. The forces of darkness prefer to cause mayhem slower so their Cows survive to continue to be fed off of."

"How about Cupid's father?"

Mercury was indignant. "I am his father!"

"Yes. I'm sorry Uncle Mercury. I meant his nurturing father."

Mercury frowned. "That man did not nurture my son!"

Felix shared his anger, "I know. I know! The poor little god must have been heartbroken! I still see it in his eyes sometimes. I meant that creep who married his mother, Mars. Is HE any Mortal's Passenger?"

Mercury frowned again. "At various times he has been the passenger of some of the most talented and ambitious military minds in you realm. Alexander the Great though not much was great about him except his ability to cause harm, Napoleon, Hitler, Osima Bin Laden."

"Dubya Bush?"

Uncle Mercury shook his head, "No. His actions were in response to the threat America was and is under. You don't know what has been going on! Neither does Trevor. Let's just say the Department of Homeland Security has been doing a better job of it than it dares let the Public know because letting the Public know what they've done to keep Americans and other Mortals safe would tip the enemy's hand to what they know about Terrorists. And it would terrify everyone. There have been some VERY close calls! Keeping it quiet keeps the Terrorists from getting what they want, which is a unhappy and frightened American population and more damage done to your economy."

Felix shuttered. "This is horrible news!"

Uncle Mercury smiled, "The forces of light are winning, Boss. Don't worry! I just told you about the dark side. But this Planet has a behind the scenes network of Angels that makes the TV show 'Touched by An Angel look like a Hallmark production. What they really do is more like what twelve billion Jame Bond's would do if he were real! They get in bloody battles and guard Folks important to the future of this Planet. That isn't always the Folks in power. Sometimes one Person smiling at a small Child can save a continent and never know they did it. Or a frown can destroy hundreds of thousands. Children grow up. They get in positions of power and how they were treated as Kids matters! One old Jew was frowning as he went down the street one day. Little Hitler saw that and it terrified him for some reason. He started disliking Jews and that dislike grew with time. The Man wasn't even frowning at little Hitler. I happen to know his feet hurt because his shoes were uncomfortable. That was all. But that did it. A bad Cobbler changed the course of history because that frown changed the course of history! Angels know the alternate time lines at least sometimes. Sometimes what they do can be as simple as getting someone to smile at the right moment. But other times they make sure the right Persons die in traffic accidents, or doesn't die. Or they sit on nukes and make sure they don't launch. That has happened twice that I know of. Maybe it's happened more times!"

Felix shuttered. "I'm a Christian. Am I doing the right thing here, helping little g gods?"

Mercury smiled. "Trevor wants so much to do the right thing that he's on the side of the Angels rather his father wants him to be, or not. Me too. Ditto for his Mother and most of his siblings. Homo Sapiens 2.0 are exactly like Homo Sapiens 1.0 in this matter. Houses are divided right down the middle and the war between good and evil is fought at the dinner table. You'll get the same reward in Heaven for helping Trevor all Mortals get for helping Strangers and strays in need because he sure was a stranger in need that first night you laid eyes on him! He was so low in money he could not have afforded a hotel room that night which means the next day he would not have been showered or shaved or smelling nice. That would have made it even harder for an undocumented worker with a seeming mental problem to find work. And he'd been trying to find work for over two weeks! He was exhausted and discouraged and feeling very unloved and very terrified! He came that close to ending up homeless! You turned his life around! And all the People he's helped, all the Couples he united, all the Babies born, you'll get some credit for that too!"

Felix smiled. "Why do you call him Trevor? You KNOW he's Cupid!"

Uncle Mercury grinned and winked, "It means 'favorite son.'"

Felix exclaimed, "Oh!"

Mercury smiled. "This was supposed to be a punishment but we gods are envying Cupid. I was talking to my brother, Neptune and my Aunt Hestia and Aeolus one day. Neptune said, "That boy is like his pet Tigress. He lands on his feet! It's true too! He's the only one of us for almost two thousand years who has found a way to openly walk amongst you Mortals without having to hide who he really is and he is serving you under his real name and making Mortals very happy which has most of us green with envy!

Felix smiled. "Aren't we Mortals suppose to serve YOU?"

Mercury smiled and shook his head. Now that IS a myth. You created all your gods to serve you not the other way around. We g o d's are like our furry reflections, your d o g's. Most of us are hardwired to imprint on you and long to make you happy and we are miserable if we can't. Most gods have been very miserable the last 2000 years because a lot of us have been put out of work by the Administration change and idle hands are the devil's workshop alright! Venus and Mars and Cupid and myself have always been more fortunate than most because we were able to still keep working, but others had to watch their jobs being taken over by Angels. I know it was time for The Change because if no other reason Zeus can't run things anymore. But It was sad!"

Felix nodded and patted Uncle Mercury on the back as if he were an ordinary, sad friend. Mercury's response was bend down and hug his neck!

Days passed. They fell into a routine. Delightful would nurse while her Mother ate her own hurried breakfast. The Child was way too polite and too self controlled for a Newborn. She seemed much too willing to wait for attention when it was convenient for her Parents. That added to her slow growth rate not that anyone could have noticed the extra slow down that caused.

She was not growing quickly not even for a half blood goddess.

Then Claire would leave for work.

After breakfast Cupid would do house work and other home stuff for awhile, then dress his Daughter and slip her in her front holster. She went to work with Daddy. Sometimes Uncle Mercury would walk to work with them. Sometimes he would just pop in later when he was needed. While Cupid prepped the bar and restaurant for the day Delightful rested contentedly in a car seat on the counter. Daddy would talk to her explaining the Universe according to Cupid and he would sing to her. He sang everything from 1960 TV theme songs and advertising jingles to ancient hymns Mortals had sung to them. And he sang bawdy sea chanties in dozens of languages and filk songs he had learned from his Star Trek Club. And he sang one particularly beautiful and haunting Phoenician lullaby one half blind, starving mad-with-hunger Slave Lady had sung to her Child as they both slowly wasted away from having absolutely NO food due to a plague of Locusts! (See Old Testament book Lamentations). It was incredibly beautiful and it was a tragedy no one but Cupid's Mom and himself remembered it!

But he had welcomed many of those precious, cute, dying Mortals into the Afterlife himself. Before the Administration Change in that part of the world, Cupid was often, though not always, the 'take away figure,' the one who welcomed Mortals into the afterlife.

Would his own family be waiting for him on the other side? Or was he merely a highly competent Lunatic as he was thought to be?

"Faith, Cupid!" He shook himself away from his bitterly, vivid memories and rolled enchiladas.

Right after the bar opened Mommy would come over for lunch and to provide lunch for her Daughter. She would go upstairs to the nursery, then turn him over to Felix when she had to go back to work across the street. Delightful and Uncle Felix would spend the morning and early afternoon quietly rocking. Sometimes they would watch TV or listen to music. Sometimes that was more excitement than either wanted and they would sit there in perfect silence listening to the air conditioner and the refrigerator hum or an occasional Bird out the open window if it was an open the windows type of day.

Both Mortal and goddess were fighting death by staying calm. Delightful needed to conserve every calorie towards growth and Felix's blood pump was not even capable of getting any stronger. If they could both last long enough Delightful's god powers would kick in and she could manipulate her Uncle Felix's all too Mortal flesh and heal him.

It was a race against death, but it was a race ran and won by taking life very slowly, not by hurry or worry! The Turtle could win but the Hare would certainly perish!

Faith.

Quiet faith.

And the painfully slow tick, tick, tick, Snail's crawl of time.

At three the bar quieted down. Too late for lunch and too early for supper, Lita and 'Merv"would take their pitifully easy shift and free up Trevor to take his Daughter from the bar to visit Mommy at the Mental Hospital across the street. Felix would come downstairs to talk Merv through stuff in Trevor's absence. Claire kept her three o:clock hour free or scheduled a Client who would benefit from watching a Baby nurse. (New or soon to be Moms sometimes came for counseling). If there was no Client, Trevor joined them and watched while the goddesses fed and fed off one another. By four the fragile, tiny Child had sucked in all she could manage. Proud and gentle Papa took her from the mental hospital back to the bar again. Felix would head upstairs again. That one trip up and down the stairs was all the exercise he was able to do.

Also at four Lita and Trevor managed the bar together in an uneasy truce while 'Merv' took Delightful and went upstairs with Felix for a Sesame Street education.

It was a proud day when suddenly "Merv" looked at the sign on the restroom wall and was able to read the words, "wash handsbefore returning to work!"He came out dancing with joy, his hands dripping wet from his having followed for the first time the newly learned sanitary instructions. He shouted in delight, "I can read! I can read! I'm supposed to wash my hands before returning to work!"

As horrified Customers looked on, Cupid laughed, "AH Merv most Mortals go in the restrooms to do more than merely comb their hair. You've been popping home for what we do. That wasn't what it meant!"

'Merv' stood there his hand dripping.

Cupid chuckled some more, "And you are supposed to dry them too!"

Delightful stayed upstairs with Uncle Felix until Claire got off first, if she got off first! The bar closed late but often she took evening Clients too, many Victims of the worst mental illness of all, insomnia, a disease that causes more suicides and more incompetence than even Schizophrenia. Even some Schizophrenic can work, if they can sleep! But without the ability to sleep even so called "normal" chronic Insomniacs rarely have much success in life.

Then in the night, moonlit or merely street-lamp-lit the four would make their way the five blocks back to the apartment. Claire had little fear. Her husband was harmless only by choice. This god of love, son of the god of war had demonstrated once for his Orderly Friends, Isaac and Hector what he could have done to them in the mental hospital if he had been so inclined. (Opportunity and ability did not equal motive).

Plus Trevor had darts in his pocket carefully capped but ready if necessary. Claire knew what her Husband could do with darts!

It was a sweet and gentle life these new-old souls had worked out for themselves. It was a wonderful rut, a routine no one wanted to ever end. Trevor was 3017 years old. Uncle Mercury was 8010. Claire was 43. Felix was 53. and for all their years never had they been so happy!

Even Lita warmed up to Delightful and by so doing had to trust her Daddy just a little bit more.

But Delightful grew only so very slowly.

And eyes were watching them. Mortal eyes that did not understand!

Trouble In Paradise

The horror of it was they never found out who the complainer was. With only selective omnipresence none of Cupid's family could possibly watch the telephone habits of every Mortal who surrounded them. But someone noticed Delightful wasn't growing and seemed listless. Someone who did not understand that she was number I a half blood goddess who would grow much slower than Mortals anyway and number II the inheritor of Cupid's family condition whatever that was. No one could know. There were less than one hundred Olympians and about a thousand other kinds of gods scattered around the Planet in their respective Future-Mortal-built virtual habitats. That was not enough for a scientific genetic study and no Scientists in the 21st century even knew they were around to study! Dr. Hippocrates a Mortal who had been granted immortality tried! Oh yes he did! But his medical degree was over 4000 years old!

He was a bit behind the times!

Oh yes they needed Claire! Dr. Hippocrates wanted to retire anyway. This new fangled game of golf looked interesting. But with almost a thousand Patients, many of them purely nuts from living way too long and having way too many traumatic memories, and his having absolutely no medical backup, who had time to learn to play?

The Mortals had not created their gods to be healthy or perfect or serene. They had created them to be interesting as in the Chinese curse, "May you live in interesting times!"

Vulcan could barely walk. His left leg hurt him. His family had almost left him to die and he had been raised by Mortals. He loved Mortals more than his own kind until he learned as a Teenager that all the gods had been created by Mortals, first written about by the Ancients and Hollywood and then brought to life and self awareness far in the future along with all other fictional characters using Artificial Intelligence Technology, And they had created him crippled and in pain, and slightly autistic!

Then Vulcan trusted no one! He became bitter!

Bacchus coped with the suffering his omnipresence revealed to him by becoming an Alcoholic.

Skinny, scrawny Zeus had a very serious dopamine problem. Thunderbolts, bad weather, global warming, hallucinations and word salad ranting and raving were likely to happen at any time. Medication helped. His Wife Hera/Juno and her daughter in law, Cupid's mother, Venus/Aphrodite did their best to get it into him.

Apollo coped by playing music. But he had also raped Cassandra then cursed her with the ability to tell the future but for no one normal to believe her. Which is why she deliberately chose to reside in a mental hospital in Manhattan called the Manhattan Psychiatric Institute. (Read K-PAX). Cupid visited her occasionally. There surrounded by Crazies who could believe her (including most of the Psychiatrists and Therapists who were crazy enough) she felt at peace.

Mars buried himself in his work. Which explains why we Mortals have so many wars and why Venus often cheated on her well loved Husband, who fortunately tolerated it.

We all know how Cupid coped.

Christ coped by taking responsibility for the entire mess on the cross and by so doing, demonstrated the love and forgiveness that could and did eventually heal the entire Universe though it would take many, many revolutions and us pitching in and working very hard to help Him. For that reason and for His willing sacrifice He was Lord of all. It was not what He was but Who He was that won Him total omnipresence and total omnipotence (such as He dared for to change too much, too quickly could cause great harm). In some long extinct time-line He had started off a mere Mortal Carpenter as divinely crazy as Trevor but even wiser, more loving and with greater ambitions. Future Science, curving Space/Time and His character alone had made Him Messiah and Lord of the Universe!

Only Uncle Mercury seemed unaffected by the Big Mess! He was too dumb and too wise to care about family squabbles. As long as there were Fish to catch and mountains on an infinite number of worlds to to hike in and his Little Squirt's Wife bought great apple pie and kept their fridge well stocked with OJ and other goodies he just didn't care! The Winnie the Pooh of the gods, a god of very little brains but a big heart, Uncle Mercury just lived in joy de vivre! And he taught that to his Little Squirt, and Trevor was teaching his Daughter, Delightful, goddess of serenity the same crazy wisdom.

"Oh little Delightful never mind that there are asteroids and nukes and lying Politicians and cigarette "science," pollution, noise, wars, gang wars, muggers, disease and mosquitoes! Dance! Sing! Rejoice little goddess! You won the sperm race! You are alive against all odds! You are part of the one Big God who is doing the best He can. Cut Him some slack! Rejoice with Him regardless what you call Him: The dancing, creating and destroying Shiva, the warm and loving Cosmic Muffin Christians feel in the back of their brains when they invite Christ in, the tired, lonely Stranger on the Bus trying to make His way home, The Great Mystery as Native Amercans call Him, Ra the Eternal Light that nourishes us All, (either Egyptian or Aztec), Gaia, the Goddess. Mother Nature, the Vine-dresser Who Guides His Own Evolution around curved Space/Time, the Omega Point Mortals around the Universe evolve into, The Boss, the Man upstairs, Providence, the End and Beginning of the Circle of Life: All these are legitimate ways of thinking about the Big Guy! Limit yourself not to just one way. But whatever you call Him/Her/It, dance and sing to Him for by doing you are singing to yourself! For all of us, (Mortals included) are each one Cell in that Great and loving Being's Body! We are all eternal Riders of the Wheel of Time!"

From stupid, wise, happy Uncle Mercury and from his Wife and the respect being Manager brought him and from the love of his Customers and his Boss and from the precious joys of Fatherhood, the neurotic god of love, Manager and Barkeep of Tres Equis was finally learning to simply live at last, free of thinking himself the son of the god of destruction! Like the Butterfly right on his nose he had failed to notice, Cupid was finally starting to feel free and find mental health. The secret had been there all along!

Simply live!

And he was a great Father!

But Social Workers could not know that. All they saw was a listless Baby who was not growing and a Father with a publicly known "severely psychotic mental condition."

Claire had just arrived at the bar when THEY came. She had just arrived for lunch and was peaking in the half cracked open door observing her little family interacting without their knowledge. Her husband was singing joyfully to their Child. It was in some ancient tongue. It seemed Trevor knew dozens of languages or thought he did and could fake them well enough to sound convincing. But she recognized the tune. It was an old Mr Clean jingle. Who knows what wild words her over the top husband had put to it to entertain their offspring? Delightful was already quadrilingual, speaking one word sentences in Spanish, Italian, Greek (Presumably) and English. If things went the way they were going she was going to pick up smatterings of other languages, hopefully real ones! But even made-up information stimulated Children's brain cell growth. Look at how merely constant chattering to Delightful still in utero had accelerated her mental development!

Trevor didn't realize his Wife had arrived yet. Silently she watched with love and amusement as her wacky but wise husband interacted with Delightful. He had switched to singing in English. Now the tune was the playground taunt, "nah nah nah nah."

"Einstein was a smarty pants

Rode light beams on a dare!

I wish I had his intellect

Instead of just his hair!"

Claire frowned considering what might have been. But you do have his intellect Trevor! Your IQ is higher than his! If only whatever had happened to you that put you over the edge hadn't happened! You enjoy being a Barkeep so much but what a waste! You could have been so much more than a Barkeep!

Trevor continued singing.

"Our friend Sir Isaac Newton, knew a thing or two

'Bout Bible codes and gravity and why the sky is blue!

Our friend Sir Isaac Newton figured apples out

And asteroids and planets and mountains big and stout

Any object stationary wants to stay that way

(Objects must be lazy like my Uncle Tray.)

Any object moving, wants to move no faster

(Ambitious just a little bit like my Cousin Bubba Fester)

For every single action

Things happen equally back

It's true for shotguns, spaceships,

And the ways that People act.

But any object moving

Tends to stay that way

'Less acted on by other stuff,

So wear your belt today!

I'd rather it be seat belts, Kid

That are that other stuff

Than your head upon my windshield, child.

'Cause windshields cost too much!"

Claire considered, Maybe I should expand my source for the real 'Cupid ' to include other kinds of missing Professors and Scientists. He might not have been a Professor of Greek literature after all. His interest in Greek literature may have been just a hobby!

Then another possibility occurred to her that made her laugh!

His subject matter may have had another explanation. Turn about was fair play! It made a sort of reverse, logical sense for Trevor to be making nursery rhymes up about Scientists!

After all according to him he was a mythological being!

Real beings make up nursery rhymes up about fairies and gods and talking Animals. But unreal beings make up nursery rhymes about Scientists and the laws of Physics! Of course!

Now her husband was sweeping the bar in preparation for its opening. But he was turning that job into a Fred Astaire level skilled dance with the broom as his partner and with Delightful as his sole known audience. She was just "peaking through the knothole so to speak." (The floor was still being swept very clean).

Delightful laughed.

So did Mommy!

Trevor Pierce was the best Daddy in the world! At least for a Preschooler!

Being an older Child would be rough for Delightful! There would be bocou teasing about her Father's condition!

But with the misinformation he would feed her, home schooling really wasn't an option! Claire sighed. Well there was always private tutoring!

She walked in the door and wordlessly went up to her husband for an embrace. Almost flawlessly she was substituted for the broom which was flung aside like Zorro taking off his cape. As Delightful watched in glee her Parents twirled around the room. Trevor started singing the Mountain song from Sound of Music backwards word for word gazing intently into her sky blue eyes with his intense and loving dark ones. Why? Claire had no idea other than, 'because he could.' That explained a lot of her husband's behavior!

Of all the moments that was when THEY came!

Two of the biggest, angriest looking Cops she had ever seen and a Social Worker who made her even in her most uptight moments seem like Robin Williams on speed in comparison, walked up to the three of them. "Are you Mr. and Mrs Pierce?"

"Yes." Claire said. "In a manner of speaking. I'm Dr. Claire McCrae, Mr Pierce's Wife."

Her Psychiatric Patient Husband had the good sense to let her, the so called 'Normal One,' be the go between when interfacing with the world under these circumstances. He sort of faded into the background.

The Social Worker sounded like she had been sucking on lemons and hadn't liked the experience, "We have a complaint about the welfare of the Child named Delightful Pierce. There are reports she is not growing, hardly moves and your Husband rants at her in several different languages while acting abnormal. And his medical history shows a long term psychiatric confinement and continuing treatment."

Claire said exasperated, "My Husband knows multiple languages, yes, and he talks to our Child in more than one of them. But that might have something to do with her being so advanced linguistically speaking. She is already talking! As for ranting. Define it. Angry ranting or happy ranting? He processes information rapidly and it flows out of him at speeds and in amounts the rest of us can't keep up with. But I think my Daughter can! They are two of a kind!"

Claire continued, "As far as her not growing and seeming listless. We are worried believe me! My Husband says he was the same way when he was a Child. And he did turn out alright, at least in that area."

The Social worker frowned, "But we have it on good authority your Husband also reports he is from Mount Olympus and is or was a Greek god!"

Claire sighed. "Yes this is true. But I keep a close eye on his interactions with her. He isn't hurting her let me assure you. They love one another and are so close it's incredible!"

The sour old Lady shook her head disapprovingly, "Our point is his belief your Child will turn out fine because he also had the same condition could be based on nothing but a psychotic fantasy! Not to mention your Husband did NOT turn out OK! He is demented and disturbed and requires constant supervision. We wish to intervene with Delightful before she turns out the same way!"

The Social Worker grabbed Delightful off the counter, car seat and all!

"Mommy! Cupid!" She pleaded.

It was one of her first two word statements and it came at the most horrible of times! Claire watched them take her Child, watched the look of fury on her usually gentle Husband's face, watched him glance at the section under the counter where the darts were kept, knew what he was considering! "Don't Trevor!" She commanded and begged!

"Thank God he listened! Oh thank the real God her false god listened!"

Instead he ran into her arms, weeping bitterly. He threw back his head and howled at the skies, then ripped his shirt like something out of Biblical times! It was actions like that, that made her Husband truly seem millennia older than he looked!

She wanted to act the same way, be the same way. But someone had to stay calm, had to be the normal responder, had to think! And that Person had to be her. Because as usual her Husband reacted as his psychotic beliefs prompted him too.

"Darn it Claire! Uncle Mercury is off delivering a message from Mom to Pops. Mars isn't even at work! He's visiting friends in the Sombrero galaxy and Mom wanted him to bring home some native foods from there! She forgot to tell him when he left so she phoned Uncle Merc on his new cell phone from Thessaly a few moments before you came and told him to pop over there and tell him. Of all the stupid, idiotic, cringely, low life foobed times for the munchies my Mother had to crave obada's now! If he were here he could have followed them and at least seen where they were taking her and what they are going to do to her!"

Claire hugged her disturbed and out of touch with reality Husband. "It's alright Trevor. We'll get her back." (There are always convenient reasons why magical abilities or connections fail when they are really needed. The mind is so clever and the most so when it's 'mad'!)

Trevor wasn't so easily consoled, "Claire you face reality! What are our chances?"

Claire looked at the floor unable to look her Husband in the eye. He wasn't THAT out of touch with reality, unfortunately!

Cupid walked back to the bar the next day with his head and his heart down, low, low low. The cracks in the sidewalk and the Ants and Water Bugs and the trash beneath his feet seemed as interesting as the sunny sea-wind scented Mountain of his childhood! He had never felt so much despair in his life! Not even when he had been cast out of Olympus powerless and completely alone! Not even when Isaac and Hector had their hands firmly on his arms and he was being forcibly guided down the halls of Sachs-Gordon Medical Centerfor the very first time!

He had thought his own species cruel! But nothing was as cruel as taking a beloved Child away from a Parent just because her family was a little different! Now he understood a lot about life he hadn't before. Why Mortals were willing to go to war! Why they were willing to kill! It was an instinct to protect their young his war-god father, Mars had twisted to further the purpose of thinning the herd. But it was an instinct he fully understood now!

He too could have fought, could have died, could even have killed if it only would have protected his Daughter or brought her back!

But it wouldn't!

The way out was to stay calm and think it through.

His Wife was right about that.

This time.

First they had to find her!

How do you find one tiny Baby in a city of over 100.000.00 souls even with the help of the gods?

The Seeking of the Gods

Cupid's family searched for days. It helped being selectively omnipresent but total omnipresence sure would have helped more! Hera organized the search, "I'll take Brooklyn. Venus you take the Bronx. Search in every room in every house. Mars you do the same with Manhattan."

"I am a Solider not a Blood Hound."

Venus said, "Mars this is your Granddaughter we are talking about!"

Mars frowned a look like dark storm clouds moving in. "No she isn't! She's that confounded adulterer Mercury's!"

Aphrodite's usually warm and sensual voice was as cold as ice! "Well it is MY Granddaughter and if you want any chances to have any Grandkids of your own through me you'd better get to lookin'!"

Meekly the god of war said, "Yes dear."

"Neptune take Staten Island."

"Why me, that?"

"It's surrounded by Ocean."

"Mercury dear you hunt in Queens both with your omnipresence and those big feet of yours. I am almost betting on it being those big feet of yours that find her. And comfort 'Trevor.' Our 'favorite son' needs all the comfort and affirmation to his worth we and the Mortal realm both can give him right now. Look at Claire down there trying to talk faith and sanity and hope back into him right now when she doesn't even feel any herself! Folks can we agree the Mortal's desire we disapprove of Claire at first is completely over with and we can now move on to phase two, starting the long process of making her a goddess? Any objections? No? I didn't think so!

"Vulcan you take New Jersey. We can't be sure they didn't take her that far. And ignore the electric plants and the factories and the water works and the research laboratories! This is a baby you are looking for not a scientific breakthrough! You can go back to solving the secrets of the Universe later! Right now the secret you need to solve is 'where is Cupid's Kid?'"

Vulcan growled, "You do realize there are only a handful of us and there are at least four million Mortal dwellings in that berg and Delightful could be in any one of them? They have us hog tied and defeated this time Aphro. It's happening! The Singularity is coming quicker than we thought and its due merely to the sheer number of the little cusses not future evolution like we thought!

"I do the best I can!" Mars whined. "They keep finding ways to make peace!"

Hera shook her head, "Quite whining, quit thinking we are going to be defeated and get moving or we will lose before we even start!"

Vulcan stared at the ceiling of their virtual environment which looked like the sky to them and said, "Doing the math. If the six of us check six dwellings every few seconds and we do this 18 hours a day for ..."

"Faith, Vulcan! We aren't The Highest and you know it!"

Hera added firmly, "We are going to find her!'

She glanced at her Husband, Zeus over in the corner sitting on their window seat, staring not at the Universe with his omnipresence or at the chameleons in their garden, but at something totally inside himself only he could see. A tear ran down her cheek, "The future of our species may depend on it!"

But then it was as if a miracle occurred that was beyond the knowing of the gods!

For a few precious moments the ancient Lord of Olympus "woke up." The confused, angry and frightened look that had been the ever deepening tragedy for decades left his eyes and was replaced with the deep wisdom that had once been his usual mental state. He stood up like an Old Lion and walked towards his family with the old regal 'obey me or else' gait. He strode into the midst of his amazed family and gazed around at them with the awesome power he had commanded centuries before! Like gentle thunder he boomed, "Claire is to be Psyche and she is to be a goddess just as the sacred texts commanded. What she has done for our Trevor, is beyond the call of Mortal Duty! She stuck by him when we did not and her reward in the eternal Realm is to be eternally beautiful, eternally wise and eternally loved beyond all other goddesses but one, her own Daughter! Yes even beyond you, Wife and Granddaughter! And we shall find Delightful for a goddess cannot be kept hidden amongst mere Mortals forever! And her Sun is rising. Mine is setting. Soon my place will be to spend forever in the calm and peace of the realm that is beyond this realm. And Delightful is a free goddess, the first unwritten about by the Mortals so only she shall write her own destiny, but for this. I write some of it for her now myself, me a god!"

The other gods gasped at his audacity!

"Delightful shall rule all of Mount Olympus forever!As her Mother's wise words and potions slowly tame us the linage of War and Madness shall cease and the linage of Love, Faith, Thought, Science, Reason and Serenity shall last forever!"

Then the shadows swept back over Zeus's mind again.

When Hera realized her Husband was gone again she burst into tears.

But it was Zeus's greatest moment! For no mere god had ever before dared to claim the Mighty Power of the Mortals, to write the destiny of one of their own!

Delightful Is Found!

It was Uncle Mercury who found her, Uncle Mercury who was slowly at the age of eight thousand and ten learning to read English by watching Sesame street and enjoying every minute of the motley Muppet Monsters with childlike glee, Uncle Mercury who after months and months still needed Felix to prompt him on making the easiest and most common of drinks, Uncle Mercury whose idea of an intellectual challenge was a good game of marbles, Uncle Mercury who had used his feet to flee from unwanted education his whole life and who used his heart instead of his head to think with and taught his brilliant son to do the same thing, Uncle Mercury found Delightful while walking in Central Park!

Yes it was his feet that found her not his god-powers.

For foster families do take their charges for walks in the summer sunlight sometimes.

He spotted her while trying to solicit a game of marbles. Central Park has a section for just about every game, even that one. He was "unbending his bow" taking a badly needed break from using every waking moment he wasn't working at Tres Equis and delivering messages hunting for his Granddaughter. He was walking to that section his pockets bulging with Cat's eyes and alleys and aggies when he spotted a young 'Mother' rolling a stroller right towards him. What would it hurt to check out one more Baby?

Faking the usual "OOOH look at the pretty Baby' interest Mercury bent his giant body down to look in the stroller.

His eyes widened. Delightful's eyes widened!They recognized one another! Fortunately the Caregiver didn't notice. She was too busy gawking at his size!"

"Mercury!" the Child exclaimed.

The Caregiver laughed nervously, "As you can see she is precocious! Poor Thing is a foster Child! Her Parents were neglecting her. She was failing to thrive. Or maybe they just starved her. The father was an insane monster!"

"Poo Poo Poo!" Delightful said with Baby fury.

"And they taught her some bad words too! I am surprised you didn't comment about her hair. Isn't it beautiful and amazing? I was considering cutting it but it is just too beautiful!"

Mercury said, "She sure does look kind of peaked! So she's put on a lot of weight since she was 'rescued'?"

The caregiver shook her head, "Actually she's lost four ounces. It's delayed stress of course!"

"Of course." Mercury lied smoothly. "So her Parents were unsuitable for her?"

"Oh the worst! I'm not supposed to give the Child's history but between you and me she belonged to that Nutcase who runs that bar in Queens. You know the one? He does You Tube videos sometimes claiming to be the god, Cupid and 'to come to his bar for a good time.' Unfortunately it doesn't seem to be just a publicity stunt. He spent time in a psychiatric facility and his behavior is most odd even when the cameras aren't on him. He really believes he's Cupid and he taught this poor Child to call him that!"

"Cupid!" Delightful said right on cue. "Cupid! Cupid! Cupid!" Her heart sounded as broken as it was.

"The poor Kid does miss him, but he must have been a monster! Who would starve a Baby like he and his Wife were doing to this precious little one? She's over a year old now and no one can tell her from a Newborn except for her vocabulary!"

"Cupid! Cupid! Cupid! Mercury!" Delightful was inconsolable.

The Caregiver stared at Mercury. "Why does she keep calling you, 'Mercury?'"

Mercury shrugged, "I can't say." To Delightful directly he said in Greek, "hang tight little one! Now that we know where you are, help is coming!"

And then spitefully he deliberately disappeared right in front of the Caregiver so only Delightful could still see him!

The Lady shrieked and started pushing the stroller as fast as she could. Mercury laughed bitterly! Even someone who was NOT the god of speed could have kept up with her, even with bunions and untied shoelaces! Vulcan could have kept up with her if he'd put his mind to it! Hands in his pockets, lack a dasically and invisible as the wind he strolled after her as she ran as fast as she could. Then Uncle Mercury realized he had accidentally done a clever thing. Like almost any frightened Person would, including most gods she ran right back to where she was keeping the Child, establishing Delightful's new location!

Mercury danced with the winds and the leaves and the blue sky itself. He whooped and he hollered and he deliberately knocked a dozen hats off of Folks, affectionately rumpled the fur of a dozen, well groomed Poodles and went "ha!" at a mounted Policeman's Horse causing him to bolt and gallop off.

He resisted the temptation to walk circles around the galloping Horse!

Trevor was going to be so pleased! At least they had beat the odds and found her!

But the Child was still in trouble!

Charley Wilcox, Bar Regular watched the Mad Barkeep, his heart filled with compassion. Trevor was tending the bar with the enthusiasm of a Dead-man walking. Every lemon wedge was cut precisely to specs. Every drink had just the right amount of exactly what it was supposed to have except in generous amounts as usual, and the margaritas tasted almost as good as ever. Every chemical ingredient was exactly the same as before. But the Customers claimed they could tell the difference!

The sheer joie de vivre the Mad Barkeep had poured into each drink: That was missing!

The red haired Giant known as "Merv" who Trevor had hired to help tend bar since Felix was incapacitated danced in then. Charley looked up amused. Just where did Felix keep getting these characters? The nuthouse across the street? This new one would not admit it but it was obvious he was just as nuts as Crazy Trevor just not as open about it. Plus obviously unlike the brilliant "god of love" he was right up there with bread mold for smarts! After months of working there Felix still had to sit at the bar and keep prompting him, "one and a half ounces of tequila go into a margarita not two ounces!" There were rumors he could not even read a recipe book and that was why Felix had to keep helping him remember the ingredients. But he could speak to Trevor in Greek! Did he think he was some kind of god too?"

The Giant sure seemed happy about something. He was dancing and looking just as full of joy as Crazy Trevor did before the social workers took his Kid. Sorrow had almost turned 'the god of love' into a Mortal! But what was Merv so happy about? Charley Wilcox did not speak Greek.

(In Greek) "I found her Trevor! I found her!"

"Uncle Mercury that is wonderful!"

Uncle Mercury frowned and shook his head, "Not really, Trevor. She's depressed and I can tell she is losing weight and knowing where she is doesn't get her back again. You could just take her and go on the run! That is all I can think of!"

Cupid shook his head, "How long do you think we could stay hidden in this modern, connected, Amber alerting world? She is talking despite still being a Baby. She doesn't grow fast enough. No matter where we go Mortal's will notice her! No. We need to do this in such a way Claire Bear and my right to raise our own Kid is legally established. When I tricked them into releasing me from Sachs-Gordon I didn't head for other parts of the Planet. Instead I stayed literally right under their noses right across the street and forced them to acknowledge my legal right to live free by conducting my own affairs with hyper-competence! Now I have to demand they acknowledge my obvious competence to raise my own Child! It's the same thing all over again except not just my freedom and quality of life is at stake but the very life and health of my Child!"

Uncle Mercury stared at Cupid.

Cupid said, "I need Allies! And I think I know just the one too! Claire will be flabbergasted but it WILL work!"

An Enemy Turned into An Allie

(Dr. Greeley helps)

Dr. Greeley stared at Trevor Pierce. "Trevor I suspect your reason for requesting your biannual review as to your progress or lack thereof with me a month early has something to do with the forced removal of your Child from your custody. Trevor I want you to know I had nothing to do with that. Neither did Dr. Frechette. I am on your side about your competency in the area of Baby raising and put in a good word for you with him. He believed me. He's interacted with you enough now and seen your You Tube videos advocating for the Mentally Ill and for your own right to live free. He was there when you helped raise funds for Autism research with your archery demonstration, safety talk and plea we just all be loving and kind to one another. He was touched by that. He no longer considers you to be Schizophrenic or violent and neither do I. You are abnormal alright but you are a different, Horse all together than what we are used to here! We are told to suspect Horses not Zebras when we hear hoof beats diagnostically speaking but you are a Zebra. I told him I watched you interact with your Baby and you were wonderful with her. Far as we are concerned you won that one! If ever they come up with drug that treats non-schizophrenic delusions and hallucinations and false memory syndrome and/or Claire's diagnosis, Multiple Personality Disorder I'll have you back in here so quick you won't know it's coming! But we don't! And until we do its a waste of Taxpayer's money to keep you in here because there is nothing we can do for you that isn't already being done on an Outpatient basis. And you cooperate. You aren't dangerous. You run Tres Equis better than fine, you keep Claire happier than I have ever seen her and your deficiencies in the reality department in thinking your Daughter a goddess were being counterbalanced by the therapy Claire obtained for your Child from the second day of her life! Plus no one loves her or understands her like you do, delusions aside. You are a wonderful Father!"

Trevor nodded, "That is what I came to see you about! Would you be willing to testify to what you just said during a custody hearing?"

Dr. Greeley said firmly, "It could cost me a lot of social status, but yes! I would!"

Trevor frowned, "The problem is the wheels of the court system move much too slowly to call it justice and my Child is losing weight out of grief she can't afford to lose as we speak! Something must be done much quicker!"

Dr. Greeley frowned, "What have you got in mind? I don't like the sound of what you just said! There is nothing legal you can do that would move any faster than a custody hearing and it's going to be a doosy! Even with my testimony your chances of winning it are not good! Never mind your mental illness. Just the fact you were raising the Child back and forth between a bar and a mental hospital doesn't look good. I know! I know! She was the darling of your Patrons on your side of the street and on this side of the street she had access to dozens of Doctors and Health Care Experts who loved her not only for her own sake but because she was Claire's Daughter and their favorite Barkeep's Daughter. The Doctors, Nurses and the Orderlies are proud of you and her because to them you are a success story! But few Juries would see it like that! To them it's not just one but two completely unsuitable environments!"

Trevor said, "When a Child is involved, if the Public can be brought in on your side, and there is enough publicity and it truly is a matter of life and death which is really is, it is possible to get away with even breaking the law!"

"No it isn't. Trevor don't make me Baker Act you!"

"Oh I want you to commit me. But I want you to do it to Delightful too!"

Dr. Greeley stared at the Lunatic. "What?"

Trevor had a VERY rational explanation! "Even Social Workers wouldn't snatch a Baby out of a hospital! My Child is losing weight due to grief and stress. That makes it anorexia. And that's a mental illness. The foster family she is with are neglecting to treat that. She needs psychiatric care and it has been argued so do I. And I want it this time because at least I'll be safe from being arrested here for what I am about to do. So you are going to Baker Act me. But you are going to Baker Act my Baby too! That way we stay together and Delightful will start eating again!

"No one has Baker Acted a Baby!"

"Is there a legal limit on the age of such a Patient?"

"No. I don't think so. It's just never been done!"

"Deliberately failing to take in enough nourishment to sustain life and growth is a dangerous mental illness, Dr. Greeley! It is literally being a danger to one's self, so she's legally insane! My Child could die! The Folks she is with fail to realize they have an insane Baby in their custody! She has lost four ounces and those are four ounces she could not afford to lose! Four more and she perishes and you know it! You are a Shrink! You do have the power and the responsibility to save her just as you would an elderly, mentally ill Person who was deliberately starving herself to death!"

"Trevor what an idea!"

"But it's true and it will work!"

"Yes it might! But what possible long term benefit would you get by my involuntary committing you too? In ninety days you will be out again and having to deal with a kidnapping charge!"

"In ninety days a good Lawyer ought to be able to convince the courts I saved my Child's life! Because in ninety days even Delightful ought to be able to put back on at least an ounce or two if she has me to love her back to mental health!"

Trevor continued, "And in the hospital I will be under professional observation. With every Doctor and Nurse and Therapist in Sachs-Gordon Medical Center watching me interact with my Kid it will soon be obvious to the lot of them I am perfectly competent to raise Delightful! If several dozen of them are willing to testify at the custody hearing, think what an impact it would make! Maybe a Jury won't believe one Shrink or one Therapist or one Orderly. But how can they ignore a whole hospital's worth of them? As you said, Folks here consider me a success story. If they could actually say they saw for themselves with their own eyes that I am a good Father wouldn't they be willing to testify for me?"

Dr. Greeley smiled. "This is true. It would work!"

Trevor smiled his smile like the Sun itself, "Alright!"

Uncle Mercury said, "Don't get up and dance in front of Dr. Uptight, Trevor!"

Then Dr. Greeley brought up the 'flaw' in their plan, "But there is one problem. As is usual with such situations, we don't know where she is."

"I do."

"You do? How?"

Trevor couldn't help glancing at his biological father out of the corner of his eye. "Never mind! You would not believe me."

Dr. Greeley saw the glance. He was a Psychiatrist used to noticing Patient trying to hide that they were looking at invisibles. He sighed, "Trevor, did Uncle Mercury have something to do with this?"

Trevor was caught speechless. He had no answer to that the Shrink would believe!

Frowning Dr. Greeley shook his head.

Darn! He had almost had him convinced!

"Tell him!" Uncle Mercury said, "Prove I'm real! We can! I don't even have to appear to him and give away I'm Barkeep Mervin too. You know how."

Cupid gazed at Uncle Mercury. Why not gaze? Dr. Greeley had figured out his Uncle was with him!

Uncle Mercury continued, "He has to keep what you say to him private. Remember?

Directly to his friend and sperm donor Cupid said, "Good point!"

Dr. Greeley felt sorry for the Poor Soul who sat in front of him. He was hallucinating again! Poor Man! The stress of losing his Baby had made him unfit to get her back! If only they had just left them alone!"

Trevor turned back to the Doctor and said,Dr Greeley you have to keep what you learn about me private right?"

Dr. Greeley felt a tinge of hope. Was "Cupid" about to give him useful information? "Yes Trevor that is how it works."

"Even from Claire?"

Dr, Greeley nodded, "Yes, Trevor. Even from Claire! She's your Wife now. She isn't your Therapist any more. She no longer has access to your files, not even the ones she wrote herself."

Trevor shook his head. "My Wife kept her own personal copy of my files for reference in the hopes of some day finishing that second book she is writing about us, but that is irrelevant. It is information she doesn't already know I wish to keep secret from her."

"But you are willing to tell me?"

"Yes as long as you keep it private and that means you don't even tell my current Therapist Dr. Donna Nikolaides. It is not in my best interests she know what I am about to tell you, but it is in my best interests to tell YOU."

Dr. Greeley cocked his head and asked gently. "Why me and not them?"

"Claire will have great difficulty coping with my really being from Olympus when that sad day comes, and alas it must, but it doesn't have to come for a while. And I would have a hard time coping with Nicholodian knowing. I like her. She's cute. She is more therapeutic to me as a game I play fooling her by telling the absolute truth than she would being awestruck by me. I really am neurotic. I DO benefit from therapy. But if she is awestruck by my species she won't see my soul. Superman is NOT Superman. Superman is really Clark Kent and I am less something to be an awe of than I am 'crazy Trevor' even though I was and will be a god. My family never felt awestruck by me and that is what I'm used to and desperately need. I was the one who took out the garbage! Do you understand? I don't need worship at least not much. I need Friends and Family who are willing to scold me when I deserve it and laugh with me or at least at me." Trevor sighed.

"I sort of do. So you don't want your Friends and Family to know the truth including your professional Friend because what you are is not who you are, correct?"

Trevor smiled and nodded, "Absolutely! I couldn't put it better myself! But I need you to know now so you can classify me correctly, because that is what bothers you about me more than knowing I really am from Olympus would; that you don't have a proper file to dump Trevor Cupid Pierce in. You like things neat and tidy. Unlike the rest you will be more of an ally to me correctly informed than merely thinking me nuts, though nuts I am. Plus I need your help now! I have to get my Kid back!"

Dr Greeley was ecstatic! Finally a chance to prove to Trevor he was delusional! Because of course whatever he was planning to do wouldn't really work! "How do you plan to prove yourself?"

"With Uncle Mercury's help. He is really here, not a hallucination as everyone thinks. His viewpoint is different from mine. I can use that."

Dr. Greeley folded his arms completely skeptical, "OK. Prove it." He gazed at the patch of nothing Trevor had been interacting with. "Uncle Mercury I'll write something on my yellow pad. You go behind me where Trevor can't possibly see it and tell him what I'm writing. You tell your Friend and he tells me. Do that half a dozen times and I will be convinced!"

Dr. Greeley started writing in his pad.

Uncle Mercury walked behind him.

Trevor listened to his hallucination talking to him for a few seconds, then frowned. He said to Dr. Greeley, "Ah, we have a problem."

Soothingly Dr. Greeley said, "Of course we do. Uncle Mercury can't do it because he isn't really there."

Trevor shook his head, "No Uncle Mercury can't do it because he can't read English very well . He's the goofball of the gods. I get my brains from my Mother! What you just wrote are not words he knows how to read yet."

Dr. Greeley couldn't help laughing. By your own admission you are as you put it, "nuts." Now it seems Uncle Mercury is a tad mentally challenged. Vulcan can't walk more than a few steps. Zeus needs medication and because he won't take it regularly we are having weird weather these last two decades! You gods need help! "

Trevor grinned, a bit embarrassed, "That is why my Family is making Claire a goddess. We need her! Besides Dr. Hippocrates really, really, REALLY wants to retire!"

Dr. Greeley laughed, "Oh Trevor you are a trip! OK 'Uncle Mercury' I am giving you and your odd Kid one more chance. I'm drawing a picture on my big yellow pad. Tell me what it is."

A few seconds passed as Trevor listened to thin air, "He says it is either a Doggy or a Horsey and don't give up your day job to be an Artist!"

Dr. Greeley's face paled. He drew another picture.

"It's a Ducky."

Dr. Greeley stared and swallowed. He drew another picture."

"Uncle Mercury says you draw Flowers better than Animals."

Dr. Greeley gritted his teeth, "What kind of Flower?"

More gazing at thin air with questioning looks. Then, "Uncle Mercury says to him a Flower is a Flower is a Flower. They smell good. Sometimes they taste good and if he were meant to be a Botanist you Mortals would have filled his skull with brain cells instead of joie de vivre. He forgot his encyclopedia on herbal medicine long ago!

"Uncle Mercury eats Flowers?"

Trevor grinned, "Sure. Cauliflowers. Broccoli is a Flower. Roses are edible. Most Mortals don't eat them, but you could. Carnations too. I have seen rose petal jelly for sale even in modern times. Believe me Dr. Greeley I've seen Mortals eat and survive and even flourish on the weirdest things and anything a Mortal can stomach we gods can, well maybe not Brussel sprouts!"

Dr. Greeley stared at the so called "patch of nothing." where some living entity really was standing! Slowly he said, "I bet. You. Can!"

Just as simple as that he had become a Believer.

He sighed, "OK. So Sunday school wasn't a waste of time after all. I always was rooting for it to be so. I just did not like false gods and I thought you were one! I guess you and Uncle Mercury and your dysfunctional pantheon are not false gods just messed up ones! You told me time circles. We made the little g gods and evolved into the Big Guy and He made us with a little help from your kind and the Angels. Why couldn't we all have done better than the likes of both of us!"

Trevor shrugged, "I have asked myself that question practically every day of my 3017 years of existence and I haven't a single answer yet, except, if you want a better Universe are YOU willing to be wiped from the time line so the really Big Guy can start over with better rules and a better cast of Characters? And even if you did volunteer most would not. For instance I'm a mess but I want to keep existing! So does Vulcan, sore foot and all. So do at least half the hallucinating and word salading Psychotics in Disturbed! Even most of them want to keep living even if their only pleasure is the pretty Nurse smiles at them when they take their heavy doses of tranquilizers voluntarily, that and possibly how the medication makes them feel! And Uncle Goofball here doesn't miss his missing brains all that much! So unless Who-We-All-Evolve-Into wants to commit Universe-wide genocide and destroy His own Ancestors and thus Himself and all of us, we are all stuck with each other!"

Dr. Greeley just shook his head, "Amazing and frightening! We're stuck on a merry go round and we can't get off!"

Cupid shrugged, "So we deal with it by loving and forgiving one another like our Neighbor said. We are all freaks! No one is 'normal,' so quit squabbling! Just shut up and hug it out! And by dancing like my Uncle Mercury taught me! And by finding a Quantum of Solace in exquisite beauty as Bond, James Bond does! From the very first moment I spotted her, Claire was that for me. So! Will you will help me get my Kid back?"

Dr. Greeley nodded, "Oh Absolutely! I don't even want to think about what would happen if you don't and anyone else tries to raise a goddess! How long until she gets her powers?"

Trevor grinned, "Other than the power to wrap her Daddy around her widdle thumb?"

Preparing the Bar For Degodding

Cupid stared up at Uncle Mercury and down at Felix trying to prepare them."Up until now this bar has been ran by a kind hearted Cardiac Patient, a hysterical Actress, a mentally challenged Giant, a Schizophrenic Dishwasher and a so called 'Psychotic Manager with delusions of godhood!' And despite the doom two different realms predicted we've done a very good job of it! But Tres Equis is about to have to do without the 'Psychotic' for a while and I fear it will fall apart without my contribution! But I have to do what I have to do to save my Kid!"

Felix said, "Trevor you go for it! I agree you have to save her. Merv and Lita and I will manage."

Cupid looked at his Boss, "Don't you go dying on me while I'm in the loony bin!"

Felix smiled gently, "I promise I won't! After all isn't the plan to save Delightful so later she can save me?"

Cupid nodded, "True."

Felix was puzzled, "By the way why is she in danger? I thought you gods were immortal?"

Cupid explained, "Potentially immortal. If nothing happens to us we have the potential to live all the way around the Circle of Time. But we can kill each other and we can die of other causes occasionally just as we can be sick or permanently injured like Vulcan. We are Homo Sapiens 2.0 but there has to be a Homo Sapiens 3.0 coming some trip around the Circle of Time because while we are improved we aren't where we want to be just yet!"

Felix shook his head, "None of it makes any sense!"

Cupid grinned wryly, "and of course the Human race in its present form does?"

"Touche!"

Cupid frowned, "There is a risk to this you know. Dr. Greeley plans to let me out after my new ninety day observation period is over and the Pierce family is dead-broke from the hospital bills, but he's a heart Patient too. He could die while I am in there and his replacement may not be so lenient to me. Or he could change his mind. The ancient Greeks called us gods capricious but we hadn't seen the likes of you modern Mortals!"

Felix grimaced in sympathy at what Cupid was about to do. Then he hugged his friend. Uncle Mercury got in on that making it a three way hug. "Friends forever!" Cupid promised. "You are Born again so you are headed for peaceful, happy New Jerusalem not that eternal soap opera on Mount Olympus! But Vulcan and Einstein set up a wifi connection between Mount Olympus and New Jerusalem floating in geosynchronous orbit above Mount Sinai. So we can stay in contact for all eternity! And you can visit us even if we rif-raff aren't allowed where you are going to live."

Felix said gently, "just get though the next ninety days, Trevor!"

Trevor swallowed, "Visit me sometimes Felix, and the hospital food is really blah so bring me Baklava with honey from St Nick's and enchiladas with mole sauce!"

Felix couldn't help laughing, "You start mixing cuisines like that and they will never ever let you out!"

Operation Rescue Delightful

It was the dead of night, the witching hour, or in this case the godding hour. Uncle Mercury gently woke Trevor up as pre-requested. The once and future god of love quietly got out of bed being careful not to wake Claire and grabbed her purse off her nightstand.

He took the purse in the kitchen, set it on the counter and riffled through it. "Ah, there!" He said. He pulled out the car keys being careful not to jingle them. "This is ridiculous you know. I ought to have a set made. What if she locks herself out of our car?"

He left the house and walked with his Friend to their car. He got in and fastened his seat belt. Uncle Mercury folded himself in and off they went.

A few minutes later the fallen love god, Lunatic, Barkeep and desperate Father rolled his car to a stop in front of a house. It wasn't far from Central park.

Cupid stared at the house, "So she is in there?"

Mercury nodded.

Cupid whistled, "Ritzy place! Almost as fancy as Mom's Palace. This Lady isn't doing foster work for money."

Mercury shrugged. "As the modern Mortals say, "ego-boo."

"Or real compassion, Uncle Merc. But it doesn't matter to my Kid. She belongs with her Mom and Me. Only gods should raise gods, or else it is like Chimps trying to raise Homo Sapiens. They may mean well. They are close enough to being the same to be OK to Baby sit for a while like those two Kids who fell into Gorilla pits who came out just fine because Gorillas really are nice People. But about the time the Mortals die of old age my Kid will be ready for her first solid food!"

"So what is our plan? Uncle Mercury asked.

"You pop in, get our little goddess and pop out."

Uncle Mercury said, "I can do that. Then what?"

Cupid said, "Then Sachs gets two more Lunatics and you and Felix handle the bar alone for 90 days! Try to keep it from going out of business! If it still in existence at all after I'm freed I'll get us Customers again!"

Mercury went incorporeal and disappeared. He was back in a few minutes. "She's there Trevor. And was she ever happy to see me! I had to shush her. She was about to wake up the household with 'Cupid! Cupid! Cupid!'

"Whoops!" said Trevor. "That's great! But how do I get her out? She doesn't know how to go incorporeal yet and if we try to open a window you know some alarm is going to go off! This is not the kind of neighborhood where Folks don't have alarms! You can escape. I doubt I can!"

Uncle Mercury laughed, "All those brains of yours and you haven't figured it out? You don't even have to be here! Go home now. I'm the god of thieves too, remember? I stole a whole bunch of Cattle before I was even out of my own crib, then invented the lyre out of a big ole Turtle shell so I could sing about what I had just done, then popped back into my cradle before Zeus realized I was even gone and acted oh so cute and innocent! When the owner of those Cows came to complain your Grandfather didn't even believe I could possibly have done it. After all, god or not I was just a widdle baby! And I just lay there and looked oh so darling and so helpless! So no one was the wiser! So stealing my own grand kid out of a Mortal crib ought to be a piece of baklava! I'll just pop in, break a window, slip Delightful through and run her out of here at quick-silver speeds before the household even gets roused by their alarm!"

"My biological Father; the real Flash!" Cupid laughed, "They ought to do comic book about us!"

Mercury laughed, "They could do funny papers about us!"

Cupid grinned ruefully, "I guess we should be grateful that Mortals don't write about us much any more. It frees us up to write our own life scripts."

"Good point. Who needs reading and writing anyway?"

Trevor frowned. "Uncle Mercury that statement grates me so deep I am even sensing a little protest from my Host, Arty! You wrote books once yourself remember? And if Humans hadn't first written about us and then in the far distance future if they hadn't used their high tech knowledge to create us we would not even be here having this conversation! Knowledge and learning and research are important! We need Psyche! It is no coincidence it took the late Twentieth century and early Twenty-first centuries to produce the goddess of thought and reason and that her Daughter is the goddess of Serenity. Because Love and Science working together are what produce Serenity finally for Mortals! Faith inspires Science and Science fulfills faith. Now go get my Kid! I'll meet you back at the apartment."

Mercury popped back in again. Delightful was crying. It was the first time anyone had seen her do that. Gently the red haired Giant said, "Oh poor little goddess! You thought I'd abandoned you again didn't you? I just had to pop out a few seconds and discuss our escape plan with your Papa. I'm supposed to be the god of thieves but I think we'd fail as bank robbers! These things are supposed to be worked out ahead of time and we are making this up as we go along! But anyway, I'm back. Can I have a smile?"

On Delightful's face and in her soul the Sun came out. She had her Father's cute smile except on a Baby it was even cuter!"

Mercury asked, "Anything from here you want? A toy?"

"No. Cupid! Mommy! Felix!"

"Coming right up!" Mercury picked up the tiny bundle. He could hold her entire body in one big paw. He went over to a window facing the street, grabbed a book off a shelf and smashed the glass. "Hmmm. I was wrong! Books do come in handy!"

He set the book down on the table. He was too busy to try and sound out the title.

It read, "Home Security Made Foolproof."

A few seconds later they were out and a streak too fast for Mortals to see rushed up the street. Delightful and Mercury giggled together all the way home!

Back at the house Trevor woke his Wife. "Claire Bear dear, there is someone here who wants to say hello to you."

Claire roused with great difficulty. Sleep had become her refuge from the tragedy they had gone through. But the sound of "Mommy!" woke her right up!"

"Delightful!" She exclaimed, "How ever? TREVOR WHAT DID YOU DO?"

Her psychotic Husband was there at the foot of their bed holding their Daughter and smiling a Canary Cat grin, "I rescued her."

Claire was more shocked than she had ever been in her entire life! "But Trevor you've really done it now! They will NEVER let us keep her now that you've kidnapped her!"

Her psychotic Husband protested, "It is hardly fair to call rescuing one's own Child a kidnapping, Claire!"

Claire groaned, "But that is what this legally is! They won't even recommit you for this! You are going to do prison time! And I'll be lucky to get supervised visits with her and you won't ever be allowed to see her at all!"

Trevor handed Delightful to Claire. She tried to nurse.

Trevor said, "Don't be so sure, Claire Bear. Dr. Greeley and I are already in cahoots about this."

She was amazed, "What!"

Trevor smiled a Canary Cat grin, "Time to take your family to your mental hospital, Claire. Sachs-Gordon is about to have two more Patients; a neurotic god whose observation by dozens of friendly Mental Health Professionals will result in their being willing to testify in court that Trevor Pierce is a great Father! And the littlest Baker Acted anorexia Patient ever!" His face clouded, "Claire she's lost four precious ounces! If I hadn't rescued her and that kept up, she would die, and that will hold up in court!"

"Milk?" Delightful demanded.

Claire held her daughter. "Oh my precious little one! They had to give me a shot to dry up my milk since you weren't there to drink it."

Delightful frowned.

Daddy said, "Don't worry Delightful. What a shot takes away in this case it can give again. Oxytocin is liquid god of love and she can take a shot of that and get those milk dispensers working again."

The Baby smiled her Father's smile and he smiled it back at her.

Then Trevor said, "in the meantime we'll have to feed you cooked, homogenized moo juice." He went to the kitchen and started preparing a bottle. "No TB all right but no vitamin C or good bacteria either. Modern Mortals cook all the good stuff out of their food to keep away the bad Bugs, but that kills the good Bugs too as well as most of the nutrition. Then their Baby's immune systems get confused and bored without the proper experience fighting off stuff to learn to function. Then they wonder why their Little Squirts get sick with chronic immune system problems! As a Barkeep, a Father and an ancient Greek I am ashamed to be serving you such inferior crap but it's all we've got right now!"

He cuddled his child and offered her the nipple of the bottle, "Drink up. At least it's calories!"

Delightful made a disgusted face but reluctantly the tiny Child started sucking. A look of peace crossed her face again and she relaxed in her Daddy's arms.

Claire was amazed at what she was feeling! Why did she suddenly have the feeling everything would turn out alright?

A Chapter About Lunatic gods, Smart Babies,

Friendly Orderlies, Bemused Shrinks and Puzzled Cops

The Pierce family showed up at Dr Greeley's house just as he was leaving for work.

As Dr Greeley got in his car he was surprised to have Claire jump in the shotgun position. Then Trevor got in the back seat with Delightful, her car seat, and diaper bag.

"Quickly!" Trevor said, "The Police are already on their way to Claire's and my apartment and they are looking for our car! Uncle Mercury can see it. So 'off to the mental hospital and step on it my good man!'"

Dr Greeley started the car, "So Trevor where is Uncle Mercury right now?"

"Walking beside the car."

Dr. Greeley laughed, "We are going 30 miles an hour!"

Cupid smiled, "For him that's an easy walk. He' faster than the starship Enterprise."

Claire said quickly, "Trevor make sure Dr. Greeley knows you know the starship Enterprise is fictional."

Cupid grinned, "Right now it is! Far in the wonderful Future you Mortals build every thing you ever desired and use Artificial Intelligence Technology to bring almost all Fictional Characters to life, sometimes in duplicate if there are worthwhile but conflicting versions. You don't just do that to us gods!"

"Astounding!" Said Greeley.

They drove the few short blocks to the hospital.

Trevor got out and without fear walked into admittance carrying Delightful. Claire walked beside him carrying her diaper bag and car seat. Dr. Greeley followed behind them intrigued that Trevor was taking the lead in his own commitment.

Fearlessly he went up to the counter, "I just rescued my Daughter from starving to death. Dr. Greeley here is Baker Acting her for anorexia and he's Baker Acting me for delusions of godhood."

The surprised Admittance Clerk stared at them and then at Dr. Greeley.

The bemused Psychiatrist shrugged and nodded.

Claire said, "You get my Husband and Daughter settled in. Dr Greeley and I will fill out their paper work."

The Admittance Clerk called for the Orderlies and Isaac and Hector were surprised to find themselves having to commit their Barkeep again except this time he not only didn't mind, he seemed to be taking charge of the process!

And Trevor's Daughter!

'Cupid' smugly informed them, "I am a candidate for the B wing again. And you can skip strapping me down until a Doctor determines I am not going to harm myself because Dr Greeley is right here."

Dr Greeley nodded, "Send BOTH of them to the B wing and let them stay together. The idea here is to keep the Family together whatever way we can until Delightful puts back on enough weight to demonstrate it was not her staying with her Family that is responsible for her slow growth! Ninety days ought to do it. And even though officially I'm Baker Acting them treat them like voluntary Patients. Let him keep his street clothes and cell phone. I am not recommending any medication at this time but if I do he is to be in charge of it himself. Let him receive any Visitors he wants. But if the ones who are trying to take is Daughter away from him come around to question or harass him, suddenly he can't receive Visitors. Are we on the same page here?"

Isaac and Hector had heard about the seizing of Delightful. A relieved expression crossed their faces. They were glad Trevor hadn't gotten worse! "We see! They grabbed up Delightful's car seat and diaper bag so her Father could snuggle her. "Come on 'Crazy Trevor.' We'll give you a room with the best view we can."

Trevor walked between his two Friends unafraid and not having to be held onto this time. "My idea of a best view would be a room that overlooked Tres Equis. If Claire brings me a small telescope or some binoculars and Merv keeps the front curtains open I should be able to monitor a lot of what goes on over there and even cell phone instructions!"

Isaac said, "I can do you one better! How about I let you borrow another lap top with a camera and we set up a web cam between yours and it?"

Trevor said, "How about several lap tops or desk tops with cameras over there set up showing the cash register area, the kitchen, the customer area, behind the counter and the back alley? Over here I'll set up a web page showing each view and monitor all at once." He smiled, "Maybe I can keep the bar from going under!'

Dr. Greeley was listening to this. He stared at Claire and communicated his amazement.

She just smiled a Mona Liza smile at Dr. Greeley and mouthed, "'crazy' Trevor?"

But then Trevor added, "It's amazing! Your Mortals are developing your OWN omnipresence! I call it Mortalpresence."

Dr. Greeley (actually knowing the truth) couldn't resist playfully laughing at Claire.

Claire grinned ruefully, shook her head and gazed at the ceiling imploring the REAL higher powers for strength!"

Trevor seemed to have being committed calmly and cheerfully under control so Claire and Dr. Greeley headed back to Admittance to fill out the above mentioned paper work.

They found the Police waiting for Dr. Claire McCrae and Trevor Pierce.

""Are you Dr. Claire McCrae?"

"Yes."

"Where are your Husband and Daughter?"

Calmly Claire stated, "Both of them have been Baker Acted to this hospital for observation and my Daughter is going to be treated for anorexia as she is dangerously underweight and refusing to eat."

The Police looked back and forth at one another, puzzled as to what to do.

Claire continued, "Dr Greeley persuaded Trevor to go along with being Baker Acted by agreeing to do the same thing to our Daughter as she is in real danger of starving."

Dr. Greeley added, "And despite his psychotic state I agree with him about the Child. She truly is in dire danger and does need to be in this facility! So does the Father because his already extremely poor mental health is being jeopardized further by the rapidly deteriorating physical and mental state of his Daughter, who I suspect will only eat sufficiently if she is with him."

He added, "Claire was unaware ahead of time that her Husband was planning to make a Citizen's arrest of his Daughter in the middle of the night."

The Police frowned, "Never the less we have to at least arrest her!"

Sighing she put her hands behind her back so they could cuff her while they read her, her Miranda rights.

After they had done that and were leading her off she called back to Dr. Greeley. "Don't worry. Because I really didn't know and can be quite persuasive I'll be out in 24."

Actually she was out in an hour and a half with the charges dropped.

The Police Sergeant turned out to be a Fan of her column. He remembered Trevor from the ball drop incident having been one of the arresting Officers and he believed her about having no prior knowledge of her crazy Husband's plans!

So he firmly scolded her for being so foolish as to marry such a Lunatic and let her go!

Trevor Makes Another You Tube Video

Dr. Robert Cornelius the The Sachs-Gordon Medical Center Physician in charge of Patient's Physical Health examined Delightful while his worried Father looked on. This was a weird situation! Both the Father and the Daughter were committed to the psychiatric ward and the Orderlies were required to attend the examination. But everyone seemed to be treating the Father like he was more than competent concerning his Daughter! He was taking care of her himself in the psychiatric ward. Strange! But Dr. Charles Greeley the head of the psychiatric department was breathing down their necks!`

The Father took the Child's shirt off and his eyes widened in fury. "This you have to see! When she was taken away from us she was small, yes, and growing slowly, yes, but her ribs weren't showing! Hang on while I snap a picture of this. Delightful usually I would tell you to smile while having your picture taken but this time you really shouldn't."

The Baby said, "OK." And frowned.

Dr Cornelius just about fainted. "She talks!"

The Father said, "In English, Greek, Italian and Spanish. One of the complaints against us was I 'rant' at the Kid in foreign languages. But saying information quickly should not count as ranting. She is intellectually capable of taking it in that fast. And Children exposed to foreign languages as Infants have little difficulty mastering them later due to how it makes their brains hardwire. Isn't that true, Love Bug?"

"Si. Yes! Ni! Wi! " said the Baby.

Papa took out his camera. He pointed out to Dr. Greeley."Notice it's a film camera. That will hold up in court better. Digital images can be much more easily manipulated. I learned something from watching CSI!"

To the Child he said, "Delightful say 'cheese' in French."

The Child said, "fromage" which of course made her frown.

The Father snapped the picture.

Dr. Cornelius placed the child on the scale. "One pound, twelve ounces." He said. "And a lot of that is hair!"

The father said, "I wish you had more than one scale. The opposing Lawyer will argue scales are inaccurate and those four missing ounces may be due to nothing but discrepancys between scales."

Dr. Greeley comforted the Man, "Yes, but you have a picture now showing her ribs are showing."

The father sighed, "But alas I haven't any pictures of before when we had her showing that they did not!"

Dr. Greeley asked, "You didn't take the traditional Baby in the bathtub pictures?"

The father winced, "In this day and age that could be interpreted as us making Child pornography. So alas, no!" Every pix we snapped shows her fully clothed. You see Claire and I were being so careful concerning my 'condition.' We were anticipating opposition to my being around her. But this situation we did not anticipate! Sigh!"

"So you gods are omnipresent but not psychic?"

Dr. Cornelius stared at Dr Greeley. What the...?

The Father said, "I no longer have omnipresence, remember? As for being psychic that's Cassandra's gig."

"You should have consulted with her!"

The Father nodded, "Yes! She isn't far from here. She lives at the Manhattan Psychiatric Institute and is good Friends with prot from the PLANET K-PAX."

After that ludicrous and crazy turn of conversation the Father then turned to the Baby and speaking directly to her as if she could understand (except maybe she could). "Delightful you no longer have even a partial ounce of fat on you. You have nothing to fuel future growth, and nothing to use as a reserve if you get a Baby sickness and feel off your feed for a few days. You lose even the smidgin more weight and your body will have to start feeding off your muscles. And it won't know the difference between leg muscles and heart muscles. You could be looking at permanent heart damage. You got that little one?"

The Baby gave her Father a troubled look. "Si. Yes! Ni! Wi."

The father said, "I promise you. I will hug you and hug you and hug you until your love tank is filled back up again! I was the god of love after all! But your sacred goddess duty is to eat and eat and eat just as much as you can! And to do it as often as you can! Because I wove you and I'll go downhill myself if anything bad were to happen to you! And then what would the Universe do? Because Baby it needs Love! It needs ME!"

The Baby giggled, which seemed the sane response for so crazy a statement!"

Dr. Cornelius couldn't help asking the man, "You are the god of love?"

The Patients eye's twinkled, "Yes. Formally.'

"Only formally?"

He grinned mischievously, "Well my Ex Psychiatrist, and Wife, Claire Bear and my current Therapist are making progress with me. Now I only think I am the former god of love!"

Dr. Greeley added quickly, "But he still has enough love left to do a fine job of raising his Child! Dr. Cornelius we strive to help our Patients live as normal lives as possible. Trevor Pierce's delusions don't negate his competency. Do you understand?"

Dr. Cornelius shook his head.

Dr. Greeley explained, "I am from Guleph Montana and despite that being a place as different from New York city as Olympus is, it doesn't interfere with my daily handling of reality. It is the same for Mr. Pierce. He remembers vividly being from Mount Olympus and being a god, but when he crosses the street he looks both ways for cars, and so forth and so on."

Trevor grinned, "I didn't at first. It took me a few, scary, near misses to get street wise. But I DID learn!"

Claire arrived then.

He turned to her like he had been expecting her. "Hi there Jail Birdy! You have the video camera?"

She nodded. "In my purse. And please go back to calling me, Claire Bear!"

Trevor directed, "OK. This one is for You Tube. Dr Greeley and Dr Cornelius stand behind me in the shot showing your support. Claire be sure and get a close up of our Baby's ribs!' He frowned, "They are showing finer than a lunch special at Sonny's!"

Trevor picked up Delightful and the two snuggled.

Dr Cornelius had to admit it. It was so obvious they belonged together!

Claire took the video camera out of her purse and turned it on and aimed it at her Husband and Daughter. Trevor gazed into it, is dark eyes brimming with concern and sincerity, "Hello Mortals. This is Trevor Pierce, once and future god of love. Check out my other videos where I prove this with my super-human-level dart throwing and archery demonstration, and be sure and visit Tres Equis Mexican bar and grill in Queens for a fun time. But right now I have something of more importance to announce to you. It isn't as fun as my other videos but please bare with me because I need you to write letters again. Claire swing the camera on our Little One!

"This our Daughter, Delightful. She isn't growing very fast, but when she was with her Mother, Dr. Claire McCrae and myself she did put on two ounces. But because of my alternative religious beliefs that my family and I are our own higher powers and the desire she be raised mulit-lingual so I talked and sung to her in more than one language and committed the psychiatric sin of doing that very rapidly in public she was removed from us and placed in foster care. During that time she lost four precious ounces out of grief making her a clear case of anorexia which is a dangerous and often fatal mental illness resulting in her need to be Baker Acted. Her total weight at birth was one pound fourteen ounces including roughly at least five ounces of hair. She now weighs two ounces less than she did when she was born about a year ago. Note while she wasn't growing fast with us she was at least growing. She had put on a couple ounces while with us but she dangerously lost twice as much weight while being in foster care. Folks, she is in real danger of dieing! Just one or two more ounces and her heart and circulatory system will be effected! Correct Dr. Cornelius?"

Claire swung the camera on Dr. Cornelius.

Dr. Cornelius frowned seriously and nodded vehemently.

Claire swung the camera back on her Husband.

Trevor continued, "I rescued her from foster care in the middle of the night. This should not be called kidnapping. It should be called 'making a Citizen's arrest.' I did it to save her life. My Psychiatrist Dr Greeley kindly Baker Acted the both of us to keep us safe from the wrong arms of the law for a few weeks. During which time my prediction and the prediction of my Wife who is also a Psychiatrist is that Delightful will succeed in putting back on at least a few of the ounces that she lost. When this happens I will enter into public record on You Tube the evidence that my Wife and myself are doing the best anyone can to put weight on this fragile, slowing growing Child! So there will be a part II to this video!"

Trevor held up the tiny, fragile Baby. "Notice her ribs are showing. If we are correct in a few weeks I will upload another video to You Tube showing they are no longer showing!

"Please Folks! Write and petition New York protective services with the demand the kidnapping charges against my Wife and I be dropped and our right to raise our own Child and the biological and emotional needs of my Child to be raised by her own Parents be honored! Because Delightful is close to death right now if she doesn't put back on some of least some of the weight she lost while under foster care!"

"Thank you and may whatever gods you believe in bless you!'

He bowed.

Trevor signaled the slashing his neck motion used by film makers to signal to the camera man the scene is done. "Cut, Claire."

Claire turned off the video camera. As she put it back in her purse she said, "I'm proud of you Trevor! That was almost free of all but the most obligatory Olympian references. It sounded almost normal. And your point was logically and rationally made! I had little hope before but now I'm beginning to have a little faith we just might win this one!"

Trevor hugged his Wife, "Oh we WILL Claire! If they have to my family will rescue us and take us to Olympus. But I am hoping they won't have to. I'd like to stay in Queens and help Felix and Lita the rest of their lives. But if it comes to it at least our family will be kept together one way or another!"

Claire hugged back but sighed, "Oh Trevor! I wish sometimes Olympus was really there! It would be so nice, having a divine back up system! Your faith gives you courage the rest of us don't have and because of it you often come out ahead!

Trevor nodded his agreement, "That's what faith is for, Claire Bear! That's one reason why it has survival value!"

She closed her eyes and hugged her insanely divine Husband hard and long, "Let's hope this time is one of those times!"

A Stone Called By the Gods!

Eli Stone had just left his Psychiatrist's office after his legally required six month review to establish is competence to continue practicing law when he had another aneurism caused vision.

The place was bright and sunny and the wind was blowing strongly. It had the faint smell of sea salt. Confused and disoriented he took a step and realized the ground beneath his feet was uneven. He looked down and his eyes widened in fear. One more step and he would have been over the side of a mountain! Been there! Almost done that already! Oh wow! 'Deja vu all over again!"

A vast valley stretched before him. There was a pastoral scene. There were Goats and Sheep and huts. He seemed to be in another time.

He swung around.

A Greek temple right out of mythology loomed above him taller than any he had ever imagined. Even CGI'd movie scenes had not shown so big and fancy a temple!

The only discontinuity was a slab of solar panels and a satellite dish bolted to the roof!

He walked forwards and startled as a blue, long haired Centaur galloped by him seemingly in a great hurry. She almost knocked him down! There was a pink bow in her long blue hair. There was a matching one on her tail. She screeched to a halt, swung around and stared at him myopically, making sure she hadn't hurt him. She had on sun glasses and her right arm was wrapped around a bag of groceries with the words 'Champ's. Super Market of Super Beings,' stamped in turquoise letters on its side. Her left hand held a bouquet of daisies. She realized he was all right and turned to go, taking off like a Race Horse at full gallop."Pardon me I'm late!" She apologized as she galloped off.

Eli called after her, "Aren't you supposed to be a White Rabbit?"

More cautiously he climbed the steps into the temple, wondering what he would see next!

There was a five foot wide, wooden square, stenciled with a small symbol resembling a helicopter landing pad symbol fastened to the top marble step. What was that about?

He swung huge wooden doors open. They swung open easily as if made of much lighter wood than they really were.

It took a few moments for his eyes to adjust to the lower light levels.

The inside did not have pews or an alter as a modern house of worship would have. Instead it seemed to be someone's private living quarters. There was a lavender shag carpet and a lot of deeply carved cedar furniture. There was a Fish tank with three, huge, contented looking Goldfish in it sitting on a sort Greek pillar. It had fake Greek pillar decoration inside of it. There was a flat screen TV on the wall turned to the Disney Channel speaking in Greek, and a very old looking Siberian Tigress lay snoozing on a lavender leather couch like someone's decrepit, pet Cat.

There was a shelf on the wall. It had ragged, second hand Star Trek books on it, many with the covers ripped off and hundreds of old fashioned video tapes.

Next to it was another shelf loaded with scrolls.

There was a player piano next to that and there was a small harp and an electronic keyboard resting on top of it.

There was a model of the Classic Trek Star Ship Enterprise on an end table next to the couch with the Tigress.

He felt like he had walked without permission into someone's private dwelling, "Hello?" He called.

The most beautiful Women he had ever seen in his entire life suddenly emerged from another room. She had piercing dark eyes and Raven black hair that went down to her knees. There was some kind of ruby crown on her head that seemed to glow like a hologram. Her face and eyes had a spiritual glow to them. Her silky, white dress looked ancient Greek and she wore a gold chained necklace with a silver heart pierced by a golden arrow around her neck. It was also glowing. In fact all of her was glowing!

She had to be at least six feet tall and she walked like a Lady who was not to be disobeyed!

Her voice was as sensorus and powerful and as smooth and unyielding as pink marble. "Eli Stone help my Granddaughter, Delightful and my Son, Cupid and my Daughter in Law, Psyche!" It was not a plea. It was a command!

She added, "The World needs Love and Thought and Reason and it needs Serenity! Faith and Science must be allowed to work together to create Serenity! The Future of both Mortals and the gods depends on your actions!"

Then suddenly he was back in San Francisco leaving his Psychiatrist's office!

He took a deep breath to reorient himself and whistled, Thank God this hadn't happened while he was still in his Shrink's office!

Weirdest vision he had ever had! He was getting used to himself being a Prophet for the God, but the Greek gods?"

Eli Finds The Reason for His Vision.

The lady who sat before him was a vision of loveliness. Blue eyed, pale skinned, blonde haired and dressed in soft Earth tones, she was the terrestrial opposite of the Raven-haired beauty he had seen in his vision. But if anything she was even more lovely than the goddess! Before he saw her he would not have thought anyone could be more beautiful than Aphrodite!

She said, "My name is Dr Claire McCrae. When I married I kept my maiden name for professional reasons. My Husband's name is Trevor Pierce though many folks call him, 'Cupid.'"

Cupid! Suddenly Eli knew this was the case his vision was about!

She continued, "My Husband and I are involved in a custody fight with the state of New York over our right and need to raise our own Daughter. On the surface their claims of my Husband's incompetency to even be around her sounds correct. But the real truth is despite the fact he thinks he was and will be a Greek god, my Husband is the best Father in the World to my Daughter and the Child's life is in severe danger if he and her are separated from one another! She has lost a dangerous amount of weight out of grief! And I DO mean dangerous amount!"

She glanced at him. To Claire's relief she didn't see any skepticism on his face. Instead he was listening with compassion and strong interest.

So she continued, "Mr. Stone I know my Husband is very sick. He thinks he was Cupid the Greco-Roman god of love and that someday he will be so again. He thinks his Daughter is the goddess of serenity and he thinks I am Psyche the Mortal who married Cupid. His best friend is Uncle Mercury and only he can see and hear Uncle Mercury! That he is psychotic is very true. But the problem is his official psychiatric diagnosis doesn't show his strengths and they are just as much a part of him as his illness. He is very warm and compassionate and loving. His social skills are so good People are willing to accept he is a fallen Greek god and/or cheerfully play along with him because he's fun! He is successfully managing a bar and it is flourishing. It did so even during the 9/11 recession. He single-handedly kept it from going out of business. And despite the fact he cheerfully works long hours I've never felt neglected or that he neglected our new Daughter. He does most of the housework and our apartment is spotless! He loves our Daughter, Delightful and she just dotes on him. He spent so much time talking to her while she was still in my womb she came out talking already! She was speaking one word sentences in English within an hour of her birth! Now, a 13 months later she is using several word sentences in English, Greek, Italian and Spanish and understands much more than that! Part of the official objections to him was he was, quote, 'ranting at her in foreign languages' unquote. But he wasn't ranting except happy ranting and he was doing it so she would be multi-lingual and it was working. Mr. Stone my Husband does NOT have an anger problem. He is very even tempered and I'm seen him calmly take guff from Folks many so called Normals would have punched their tormentors out for! His belief he is a superior being and we are just poor, misguided Mortals actually helps him hold his temper!

"Besides being psychotic my Husband's aptitudes are off the chart and part of his social difficulty is the usual social difficulties highly intelligent People have. Even when I can tell professionally he is making perfect sense, Folks often don't understand him and falsely attribute how his superior intellect makes him sound to his psychosis. But I can tell my Daughter can keep up with him. If anything she is going to be smarter than her Daddy! And that is another reason why she belongs with him: Highly intelligent Children literally go painfully neurotic if there is no one around to intellectually stimulate them and oftentimes in normal IQ households they are punished and discouraged from what their intelligence makes them need and want to do. My Husband may be nuts but our sensitive, intelligent Child won't suffer neurotic boredom being raised around someone who can almost keep up with her! He understands her perhaps better than anyone else can. They need each other and they both know it! Somehow we have to make a Jury and a Judge understand this!"

Eli asked, "But why come all the way to San Francisco for help Mrs. ah Dr McCrae?"

Claire sighed, "because while we know a lot of Lawyers who would be willing to represent "Cupid" concerning his own right and ability to live outside a mental hospital, not one of them had the balls to take on defending a psychotic Mental Patient's right to raise a Child! That raised the bar a bit too high for them, obviously! But my Husband googled and found you. He thinks you do have the balls!"

Eli said, "Why didn't your Husband come with me to consult with me?"

Claire sighed, "Because right now he is confined at my place of work, in the psychiatric hospital called Sachs-Gordon Medical Center. It's not what you think. He himself arranged with his Psychiatrist to be Baker Acted and then voluntarily involuntarily committed there for ninety days along with my Daughter so they could stay together long enough for her to put back on some of the weight she dangerously lost while in foster care. Their legal status is iffy but so far Child Protective services has hesitated to remove a Child from a mental hospital who demonstrates a clear need to be there and my Husband can pull a Howlin' Mad Murdock if they try to remove him. So far he hasn't even had to. The minute the Police realized he was confined there they ceased their attempts to arrest him. After all almost everyone in New York knows my Husband thinks he's Cupid. He hasn't tried to hide his beliefs. Strangely enough he doesn't really need to be in there but my Baby does. She was premature and weighed only one pound fourteen ounces at birth and at least five ounces of that was hair! Plus something is wrong with her. She is not growing at normal rates. But she did put on two ounces while she lived with us. But while in foster care Delightful lost four ounces she could not afford to lose and now weighs less than she did at birth over a year ago. So her life is truly in danger! That is NOT a psychotic delusion of my Husband's! But he took the law into his own hands and broke and entered into the foster home and removed her without permission in the middle of the night." Claire frowned, "He calls it, 'making a Citizen's arrest' I hope that will hold up in court! He may have saved her life!"

Eli nodded, "It might if it can be demonstrated the Child's life really was in danger. Juries and even Judges are often soft touches when Babies are involved.

Claire's face brightened, "Then you will take the case?"

Eli nodded, "Let's just say the gods commanded me to take this one, Dr. Claire McCrae!"

Singing in Solidarity

There are hundreds of ways to fight boredom and despair. Cupid was thousands of years old. Cupid knew most all of them.

If there was any place he was needed more than his bar, it was his Wife's mental hospital.

But thanks to Mortal Magic he was going to attempt to fight boredom and despair at both at once!

Isaac watched Cupid. The colorful Barkeep definitely had a bad case of "Cellphone Schizophrenia." The whole time he had been confined in the harmless ward at Sachs-Gordon when he wasn't talking or tending to his well named daughter he had spent almost every waking moment talking to 'disembodied voices' that "lived" inside his little, plastic box. When he wasn't talking to his Wife on her rare moments off he was dictating instructions to that red haired giant at the bar known as Merv or trying to manage the bar long distance.

Merv couldn't keep the ingredients for making drinks straight if he'd been threatened with impalement on a pole! He was often over at the bar wearing a blue tooth wireless head set and 'Cupid" kept having to remind him over and over again of what went into the simplest concoction!

Isaac wasn't sure why Cupid put up with him. He was Manager after all and could certainly have hired more competent help! But the way they acted towards each other made him suspicious. Was Merv was some kind of family member? That was really mysterious considering Cupid insisted all his relatives lived on Mount Olympus!

The guy could definitely speak Greek. Did he think he was a god too. Were they? But whoever heard of a mentally slow god?

But then, whoever heard of a crazy one?

However Cupid's current conversation with the folks at Tres Equis had nothing to do with the ingredients of drinks.

Isaac inched closer to listen. The "god" had his "communicator" set to speaker phone mode so he looked as nuts as the other Patients. Many of them were talking into thin air. So was Trevor Pierce. His cell phone lay on the table. If one didn't look closely it was easy to miss that important difference.

Isaac overheard Felix say, *OK, Cupid stand in front of the lap top. You should be coming through now. Yes. There you are!*

Looking crazier than he really was under these circumstances Trevor gave the lap top his loopy grin and cheerfully waved at it.

Voice on the phone: *You're looken' larger than life Cupid. You're a bit fuzzy. The lap top camera wasn't made for a twenty foot movie screen.*

Trevor grinned, "We gods have always come in a bit fuzzy to your Mortals. So what else is new?"

*Modern tech you divine looney! Up to now only Cecil B DeMille put you guys up on the large screen!*

Trevor laughed.

It was amazing how Felix was just accepting that his Bar Manager was a little g god. But then he himself often suspected it.

Trevor wasn't "normal." That was for sure. But he was too wise and loving to be merely a Lunatic. There had to be more to it than that!"

Isaac asked, "What are you up to now, Cupid?"

The Father/Barkeep/Bar Manager/fallen god and Mental Patient smiled, "I am about to try to top myself. I've done many a successful singalong at my bar. I've done a few over here when you party poopers don't stop me. I want to see if I can get both sides of the street to singing and dancing at once in a show of solidarity, and thanks to Mortal magic it's theoretically possible. What I don't know is if my ability to make Mortals know the words to songs and the steps is transmittable all the way across the street. I've never tried to project myself that far before since my fall. As an unbirthday present to me Felix hired the sort of Expert it takes to patch his lap top into our Tres Equis movie screen. So now my little lap top cam over here broadcasts to the whole Customer area over there. If I can make my god magic interface with electronic Mortal magic you may be able to witness something never done before in this trip around the Circle of Time!"

Isaac smiled. Humoring "Cupid" was very easy to do. Gently he asked, "I thought your family took all your god powers away from you?"

"They did leave me keep some of my mojo, Isaac. I can still tell most of the time when two People belong together. And to cheer up the People of New York because of 9/11 I was allowed to keep my ability to keep that when they are willing to let me I can help Mortals know the words to songs and sometimes the steps if they are really open to me. What I don't know is, what physical range am I still capable of in my current cast down state?"

Isaac said gently, "If the goal is just to make people happy why not just print out some song sheets or arrange to have the words flashed on the screen?"

Trevor stared at Isaac. He was speechless for a few seconds. Than he said, "Out of the mouths of Mortals!" He spoke into the air again, "Felix here's another idea fresh from the mental hospital. The place really is therapeutic if one is careful which Mental health Experts one listens to. The Docs are nuts sometimes but I find the Orderlies invaluable! Is our printer working?

*Yes, Cupid. It was last time I checked."*

"Good. Do we have a lot of ink right now?"

*Lita bought some more last trip to Staples.*

"Good. Get Lita to google the words to 'All You Need is Love' and print out about 50 copies. No. Don't you be making unnecessary trips upstairs. She can at least do that. After all she's in showbiz too!"

It turned out some of the Customers at Tres Equis were able to pick up Cupid's vibes all the way from Sachs-Gordon. Most of those were Regulars used to turning their mind over to whatever loving force it was that suddenly put the words to songs in their heads. Others needed the help of the song sheets. So it seemed the Mortals themselves had a lot to do with who could or could not be 'touched by the gods' But all on both sides of the street got caught up in the joy and energy!

As the singalong on both sides of the street got going good and steady Claire and Eli walked into the B Wing. Claire smiled with delight. This was how she had first met her Husband and now it was how his new Lawyer was seeing him for the first time too, at his craziest and his wisest and his most joyful and loving!

"Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!

There's nothing you can do that can't be done!

Nothing you can sing that can't be sung!

Nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game!

It's easy!

There's nothing you can make that can't be made!

No one you can save that can't be saved!

Nothing you can do but you can learn how to be you

in time - It's easy!

All you need is love, all you need is love,

All you need is love, love, love is all you need.

Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love! Love!

All you need is love! All you need is love!

All you need is love, love! love is all you need!

There's nothing you can know that isn't known!

Nothing you can see that isn't shown!

Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.

It's easy!

All you need is love, all you need is love!

All you need is love, love, love is all you need!

All you need is love! (All together now!)

All you need is love! (Everybody!)

All you need is love! Love! Love is all you need!

Eli thought at first he was having another vision. He was used to the aneurism in his brain and whatever Supernatural Force it was that took advantage of that to turn him into a completely accurate Prophet, making him see Law firms and courtrooms and streets full of People sing and dance. So why not a ward full of Mental Patients? He tried to fight it but of course as usual soon he was singing and dancing along! Amazingly it was worse than ever! The Person he had arrived with also seemed to be affected. Claire too had started singing gently and swaying gently to the beat. That made getting a reality check impossible!

But it went on and on and on! Usually visions lasted only a few minutes

It was two hours before it stopped. An hour into it Eli began to suspect what he was seeing was real.

It either was or he had fallen into a coma again and the vision wasn't ending.

Sheer exhaustion upon everyone's part finally brought it to an end. Their spirits were willing for it to continue but their flesh was too weak!

Even the Man who thought he was Cupid looked happily worn out. He relaxed next to the table that held the lap top and the car seat with his Daughter, his feet propped up on another chair. Amazingly the Baby was singing and chortling "Love! Love! Love!" over and over again. She really could talk! And She was one of the tiniest Babies he had ever seen but with the longest and reddest hair!

Eli sat down next to him, "Hello I'm Eli Stone, your new Lawyer."

The Mental Patient looked at him, "Yes. I recognize you from the picture on your website. He put out his hand to shake. "I'm Cupid, also known as Trevor Pierce. This is my Daughter, Delightful. I know you met my Wife. Hi Claire Bear! Did you get mistaken for a terrorist at security?"

Claire laughed, "No you goof ball! Beautiful Blondes get to sail right through security!"

His eyes were twinkling. He shook his head in mock disgust. "Pure Discrimination!" The Mental Patient laughed, "But right now I have other civil rights issues to concentrate on." Then he frowned and looked up at Eli. "Unfortunately!"

Eli Stone said, "I recognize you from your web site andyour You Tube videos. Trevor those might help us make our case. The fact you directed them and are managing a bar shows People skills. Those should be more important to any half way decent Judge than your rather odd religious beliefs."

Trevor nodded, "That is my opinion too. Now make Reality Space accept it!"

Observations of the gods.

At Eli and Trevor's requests the staff members of Sachs-Gordon Medical Center observed the Psychotic Father and his precocious Baby interacting in the B Wing and wrote down their observations.

As Psychiatric social worker Donna Johnson watched, 'Cupid' and Delightful watched the Aries launch on its way to the Moon. 'Cupid' crouched on his knees in front of the lap top which was turned to the NASA channel. It was if the god was worshiping NASA. He held his happy Baby in his arms. With the Announcer and Folks all over the Planet in both realms they both chanted the ancient, powerful, magical incantation that launched mighty Mortal rockets! Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! One!"

Cupid's geeky soul was filled with bliss and pure joy! Oh what a glorious day it was! Finally Mortals were launching something manned again that actually was going somewhere! No more ridiculous, "flying brick piles' going round and round the Planet as if Columbus had merely sailed back and forth off the coast of Spain for over thirty years!

As the grand machine strained and surged bravely towards the heavens, the compassionate, geeky, fallen love god and good Father slowly stood up with it, lifting Delightful over his head as high as he could until he was standing on tippy toes.

She shrieked with glee!

Trevor shouted, "Chariots of the Mortals! Whee!" Then he cuddled her close and whispered to her, "The Mortals are trying to do Icarus's gig again. But this time they are doing it correctly! No more silly wax feathers and hurling one's self off a cliff straight down!" He looked at Donna. "That is all that really happened. The rest of that story was exaggerated. There wasn't any real flying there. Icarus's wings didn't even work as a decent hang glider! He just fell straight down and went splat!" Daddy kissed his happy Baby and then said gently, "They Mortals are about ready for the solar system now, though I have my doubts about Alpha Centauri!"

He frowned, "I wish they hadn't named it after Pops. It just isn't like the US to name something after the god of war! Nine Eleven really changed them! It changed ALL of us!"

"Mars?" Suggested Delightful.

Trevor gazed at his Daughter. "You mean the planet?"

"Yes. Si. Ni! Wi!"

The gentle Mental Patient smiled and nodded, "Lets HOPE they just named it after the planet: Future goals, not a declaration of admiration for my Father and his violent ways!" He smiled, "I wonder when they will name some mighty rocket ship after yours truly? I can hardly wait! I know they named an asteroid after me. But PLEASE! I am not a menacing piece of rock!"

Donna asked, "Can I sit down?"

Cupid said, "Sure! Everybody in the room should be watching this. Everyone in the Planet. You've grown too complacent. If you lived back in Columbus's time far too many would be watching the Bear fights instead of watching Columbus launch his ships. Actually I did see that that with my own eyes! But they had more excuse. Most didn't know what was going on! You modern Mortals do! I doubt anyone on Olympus is missing this. We gods appreciate the Mortal Miracle of this more than you do yourselves!"

Donna frowned, "I thought the gods were against Human progress. Didn't you stop Icarus by letting the sun burn his feathers?"

Cupid shook his head, "Now as I just said that is a story that was greatly exaggerated. We gods had nothing to do with it. We didn't even know about it until long after the fact. We only have selective omnipresence you know not total. We can tune in and observe anything but we have to be paying attention and we weren't to him at that moment. He made himself a pair of wings out of feathers and wax and he tried to launch himself by going off a cliff. Well what do you think happened? He went (Trevor gestured with his arms) straight down. It was apparently a hot day as it often is in Greece so the Sun did melt his feathers but he was already on the ground in terrible shape already I am sure. Someone found him and concluded he had fallen out of the sky instead of off the nearby cliff! But what a tall tale that was!" Cupid laughed. "He was a brave man, just a foolish one. But all modern hang gliders have is a better grasp of the laws of physics and better equipment. They do the same thing! But you won't catch me trying that. So much for being crazy! But the real hero of failed aeronautical attempts was in my opinion the very first Astronaut, or Taikonaut if you prefer. He lived about 500 years BC in China. Yes, no kidding. He built what was for its day an enormous rocket. It even had a launch gantry. He put a saddle on it and sat on it and waited until the Moon was at its tip. Then he had a Friend (some Friend) light it and off he went never to be seen again. I think it's safe to say he didn't reach the Moon except in an incorporeal form!"

The Aries had reached separation stage at that point and Cupid commented, "I really do wonder when they will name one of your grand space ships after yours truly? I can hardly wait! I deserve it! Out of all the little g gods who has done you the most good? Huh? What could possibly be more important than being helped to fall in love? Without your BEE where would most of your population be?"

The Mental Patient pretended to gaze up and up and up at a huge rocket. He spread his arms wide and high, "I can see it now, the first Manned Mortal vessel to reach Jupiter and it will be named after me!"

Isaac quipped, "Oh come on! Who ever heard of a rocket ship named, Trevor Pierce?"

The Mental Patient laughed, "Oh I don't know. It kind of has a nice ring to it don't you think?"

Donna smiled and started scribbling in her pad.

Trevor tried to cran his neck and read it. She bent it so it was harder for him to see. He said, "I don't really care what you write as long as you write I'm a great father!"

She smiled and nodded and decided to show him what she had written. It said. "Abnormal behavior. Out of touch with reality. But the Baby is thriving from his love, joie de vivre and gentle, amazingly wise tutelage."

Hector stood guarding the harmless ward, a job that was often boring as it wasn't called the harmless ward for nothing. It was like guarding a room full of elderly Nuns and Monks. But it was made standable by the friendship of the more lucid Patients.

He watched "Crazy Trevor" trying to manage the bar across the street by lap top and cell phone while tending his Child and coping with the curiosity of the other Patients and Mental Health Care Professionals.

He explained to Hector and the rest of the ward, "No, I am not mad at the Person on the other end of the phone. I'm having to shout because our Distributor is a very hard of hearing and forgot his hearing aid again. DON, I SAID 50 CASES OF JACK DANIELS NOT NIFTY BRACES OF SPANIELS. WE WERE DISCUSSING NEXT WEEK'S ALCOHOL REQUIREMENTS. WHY WOULD I SUDDENLY BE TALKING ABOUT DOGS? YES. THE COCKER SPANIEL IS A VERY FINE BREED. NO. I DIDN'T KNOW YOU HAD ONE. CONGRADULATIONS! CAN WE GET BACK ON SUBJECT? HIS NAME IS QUINCEY? HOW NICE?" Trevor sighed. "HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO EXPLAIN TO MY DAUGHTER ALL ABOUT QUINCEY WHILE I DO SOMETHING ELSE? Trevor set the cell phone down next to Delightful's car seat. The Baby gave her Daddy a look that was beyond her years. She understood she was running interference for him. Trevor said in a voice too low for Don to hear though everyone else in the room could. "If he starts talking about liquor again, alert me."

Delightful nodded.

Hector gave a low whistle, "Not all the Crazies are locked up!"

Trevor nodded and frowned with compassionate worry. "He's got early onset Alzheimer's and a Wife to support. I can't even text message him. He doesn't remember how to do text messaging any more! I don't know what he is going to do! Felix and I don't want to fire him and find another Distributor but it's beginning to look like the time has come we will have to. Felix and I are two of a kind. We'd like to help everyone. After all Felix gave me a chance! But we have to keep the bar running. If it goes under due to the incompetency of our Distributor more People will be hurt than just Don and his long suffering Wife. I guess Spock is right again, as always, 'the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one.'"

That was not the statement or behavior of an incompetent Person. Delusional about his past, yes, but well into present day reality and coping as well as present day realty made possible.

"Now!" Said Delightful.

With a nod at Hector Trevor picked up the phone again, "YES. AS I WAS SAYING WE NEED 50 CASES OF JACK DANIELS..."

Hector smiled and planned his notes.

Dr. Greeley sat next to his divine Patient watching 'Trevor' tweaking his web page. "I know who you are now and I'm amazed! Where did you learn computing, Cupid? Do they actually have computer classes on Mount Olympus?"

Cupid smiled and shook his head, "No. Like most contemporary, Adult Mortals we gods have to pick up our computer literacy catch as catch can. Some gods are computer literate and some can't care less even though it is what these evolve into that makes us gods and other Fictional Characters self aware and real. Zeus doesn't know them from a black and white TV set. Medusa is into Secondlifedotcom and Worldsdotcom and is an eBay power seller. Its been a Mortalsend for her. She can't let anyone see her not even other gods but finally she has a social life and something to keep her occupied! She's bringing in the Euros. We need them. We can't be stealing stuff from your Mortals all the time! It just isn't fair! My Uncle Vulcan is as usual the freakiest, geekiest god of us all. He learned as we often do. He just watched Mortals until he had the hang of it but he learned it the fastest and the mostest and gets asked to get wifi set up in the rest of the god-keeps. But I actually didn't get into them until I was cast down." He patted the laptop with a bit of honest affection. "Everything I know about these nifty gadgets I learned from New York's fine public library system and from tech support. It helps to be able to speak Hindi! The internet helps me, Doc! When I was first cast down my loss of omnipresence actually physically hurt me. I had experienced an entire sense completely ripped out of my mind! The neurons in my brain kept reaching out trying to find the connections that had been there but they were meeting up with nothing, just a humongous painful canyon where before there had been multiple bridges out of my now isolated consciousness. I was experiencing phantom, omnipresent pain exactly like phantom leg pain, and having flashes and twinges of false omnipresence which was disconcerting and scary! I know what Schizophrenics go through! I didn't dare tell any of you Mortal Mental Health workers because you simply could not have understood! Television and the Net really helped! Some of those dangling neurons sort of reconnected to the experience of couch potatoing and googling and that has soothed the pain and filled the empty canyon with new real sensations which stopped most of the false ones."

His cell phone rang again. Cupid picked it up and set it to private mode. It was 'Merv.' Cupid sighed when he realized what 'Merv' wanted. "'Merv' Delightful has heard me tell you how to make a peach margarita so many times she knows how. I'll let her tell you because I'm talking with one of my Shrinks here. He set the cell phone back to speaker phone and set it down on the table next to the car seat. Delightful started rattling off the ingredients in Greek!

Dr. Greeley was getting used to the unusual family but this surprised him. He stared at the webcam feed on the lap top. He pointed at an incredibly tall figure behind the bar. "Cupid, is that Merv?"

Cupid nodded.

"He looks a lot like what you claim Uncle Mercury looks like."

The god gave the Psychiatrist a mischievous grin. "What with modern communications he's not needed much for delivering messages unless Mom needs to talk to Pop off world. She can call the cell phone I got him from a pay phone in Thessaly if she needs him to go tell Pops to hone in on her. So he's free to go about the Planet and he's got a lot of free time on his hands and keeping the Bar open helps his family, so he's working for free." Cupid sighed, "But he can't remember diddly squat! He's brilliant, wise and creative at processing information he has managed to remember. I do get SOME of my smarts from my biological Father! But he has such terrible trouble holding on to new information and he's terrified he will pass that problem on to Delightful or one of her descendants!"

Dr. Greeley could hardly believe what he was saying or who he was saying it about, "Sounds like a short term memory problem."

Cupid nodded, "I can hardly wait for Claire to get to the point where she can face reality. That god needs help and I know just the Therapist to provide it for him!"

Dr. Greeley said gently, "Send him to me, Trevor."

Cupid's eyes showed his gratitude. "Thanks Doc! He gets a break at 4. Can he come then?"

Dr. Greeley wondered, what did I just get myself into? But he nodded.

Cupid picked up the phone again and talked into it, "Uncle Mercury Dr Greeley wants to see you about your memory problem. Is four OK? You can miss Sesame Street just this once."

There was only silence on the other end of the phone.

Gently Cupid spoke into it again in ancient Greek.

This time a soft and timid reply in Greek was sent back.

Cupid looked up at the Shrink and said, "He is willing even though he is terrified but he wants me to stay with him."

Dr. Greeley said, "He is a god and he is afraid of me! Really Trevor I would prefer you to stay, considering what he and you both are!"

At four Hector brought Cupid to Dr. Greeley's office just as he had been ordered. The friendly god calmly sat down on the couch.

Dr. Greeley gazed at him, "Where is Uncle Mercury?"

Cupid smiled and gestured at the other spot on the couch, "He's here Doc. He's just a bit nervous!"

Dr. Greeley smiled, "Usually when a Patient tells me there is a big, invisible Man in the room with us I start thinking 'medication! But this time...it's OK to show yourself Uncle Mercury. I saw you on the web cam already. I know what you look like and I know you are real and how can I possibly hurt you?"

Uncle Mercury sort of faded in slowly.

Man was he tall! He also looked very embarrassed!

Dr. Greeley sighed. Even the gods were uncomfortable seeking help! Gently he said, "Cupid tells me you have trouble remembering things."

Reluctantly the red haired giant nodded.

"Can you tell me if you were always like this or did it start at a specific point in your life?"

Uncle Mercury said, "It started when I was around Four thousand, five hundred years old."

Gently Dr Greeley asked, "Can you remember if something happened to you at at that time in you life that could have caused your memory problem?"

Smiling at the irony of it Uncle Mercury said, "I don't know. I can't remember! Unlike the egghead here who actually got in trouble with his Mommy Aphrodite for spending too much time studying accounting when he should have been shooting People with his arrows I've never been able to master much math and I used to run away when my Father Zeus tried to teach that to me! He certainly couldn't catch me either! No one could and they still can't! But as for words! I do know there was a time, long before Eros here was born, when I actually wrote books! I wrote an entire encyclopedia about herbal medication! But now I can't even learn how to make a Mexican sunrise without repeating the instructions verbally over and over and over again!'

Trevor nodded, "Brizo told me about those books Uncle Mercury. She says its a shame they didn't last to modern times because she vaguely recalls there were cures and very successful treatments in there for things modern Mortals still suffer from. The knowledge and the last copy of your book was lost during the dark ages and you can't remember what your wrote either due to your condition!"

Dr. Greeley frowned at the private and public tragedy of all that lost knowledge! "Uncle Mercury usually I would recommend a pet scan or at least an MRI but I doubt you have insurance. Plus I don't know what I am looking for with a god!"

Cupid broke in, "We 2.0 Humans are actually pretty close to the 1.0 models in many ways. You'd be more amazed at our similarities than our differences. The biggest difference is our gut brains are much bigger and we do a lot more of our thinking with them. It is easier to add neurons down there than to put more inside our skulls which are the same size as you Mortal's obviously and don't have any more room for additions." Trevor pointed to his torso and his skull. "There is a lot more room for extra down here than up here."

Dr. Greeley was stumped, "And I wouldn't know what was abnormal down there since I never saw the like before! All I can do is do what Shrinks used to do in the bad old days before MRI's and PETS, ask you questions and diagnose by inference. Did any of your Relatives ever have memory problems that started about that time of your life?

Uncle Mercury shook his head, "I don't think so. My Mom Maia is still sharp as a tack and Trevor seems to be so also. But he's only 3019 right now so the scary thing is he isn't old enough yet if our age is a causative factor. Doctor I'm scared for my Grandkid! She's a genius even by god-standards! But what if this happens to her too? It still might get her even if it doesn't harm Trevor! I've watched you Mortals for thousands of years. I know things skip generations sometimes!"

Dr. Greeley nodded, "It is highly likely that something just happened to you, not that it's heredity. But what?

Uncle Mercury shrugged. But my Father has gone nuts! What if dulled learning ability is the first sign of that? Zeus is billions of years older than I am. His brothers and sisters are alright but still it's really scary! I'm a direct descendant. So is my brother Mars and Trevor here and my Grandkid! So is Vulcan and he's already got his own way of being strange! But the fact Papa didn't even go nuts until he was billions of years old, near the end of his second trip around the wheel of time, is really, really scary! Because for billions of years I have to fear there could come a time when I will be crazy as well as stupid and it could happen to my brothers and sisters and kids and grandkid too. Is that what I have to look forward to? Remember we gods don't die most of the time. Papa is going to be psychotic forever! And I'm going to be at the best stupid forever and at the worst stupid and crazy forever! And the rest of my family?"

Trevor said, "Uncle Mercury, Claire Bear is going to be with us someday, soon by our standards though long by her's and she'll think of something! On behalf of my Wife I can promise you that! And progress marches on. The Mortals will think of something to help us! Even if they have found a better God to worship they won't abandon us about this matter! I know they won't. I have faith! See? Dr Greeley is already trying to help us!" Trevor's face had the look of a True Believer.

It was touching in a way. Dr Greeley was amazed! He had never been the object of religious faith before! But it made sense. Who did the gods worship? The gods worshiped Mortals of course. Even when we don't realize it prayer goes both ways!

Gently Dr Greeley said, "What happens may be preventable. It may be strictly environmental or a combination of environment and heredity. Changing the environment may stop or at least slow down the problem. There is even a rare chance it may reverse it! But lets try and figure out together what caused it.Did you hit your head?"

"No."

"Did you fall?"

Uncle Mercury shrugged, Yes, but not that I hurt myself. I can fly you know. I stumbled off Mount Kilimanjaro one day hiking but I just soared back up again before I hit bottom and continued where I left off. So it was no big deal. Doctor I don't know what is wrong with me! Help me!"

Dr. Greeley stared at the ceiling as if asking for inspiration from Trevor's species. "What could you possibly have done? Were you poisoned environmentally?"

Trevor said, "I don't think that's it Doc. We eat fresh food most of the time. We gods haven't developed the TV dinner habit yet. We cook over real fire or at least virtual fire! And we do it the old fashioned way with fresh foods out of our gardens and out of the sea and the Cattle fields again, at least virtually. Plus we have no heavy industry and we get the fresh sea breezes to breath from the Mediterranean."

Dr. Greeley said, "I remember from my history the ancient Romans had a lot of lead poisoning. I think we should at least do a blood test. I'll pay for it."

Uncle Mercury looked horrified!

Trevor tried to comfort the older god, "Those needles don't hurt that bad Uncle Mercury! I am required to have a blood test every month. After a while I've almost gotten used to it. Plus the Lady who does the needle sticking is pretty and as gentle as she can manage to be. You might even enjoy all but the needle stick itself!"

Dr. Greeley said, "Trevor his blood isn't going to show up as Alien or anything and give your being here away will it?"

Cupid shook his head, "Oh no. On the superficial level they will use to test for heavy metals it's going to resemble normal type O blood just like a lot of Mortal Humans and Chimps. Because unless they use an electron microscope to look at the DNA and saw that it is is three stranded there won't be enough difference for anyone to notice or for it to matter!'

Maggie Hollings was surprised when Trevor Pierce walked into her phlebotomy lab without his usual fear and distress and two weeks early. Usually he slunk in, a big frown on his face, always sure it would hurt more than it ended up doing. Then he would compliment her in amazed relief after it was over! She had learned the best way to distract him was to talk about her love life. Despite no longer 'needing to match couples to get back to Mount Olympus' the 'love god' still did it sometimes as a hobby. So 'Cupid' was always trying to find her, her True Love and sometimes the Boyfriends he found for her actually lasted a month or two which was admittedly always longer than the ones she found on her own! When she had succeeded in keeping one through the month the "god of love" was deliriously happy, needle-stick and all. Sometimes he even forgot to wince. When she had to report she had broke up still again, which was most of the time, the tiny needle, no matter how gently she tried to insert it seemed to feel like a crucifixion to this "god!"

At her questioning gaze he cheerfully explained, "Countess Maggie I brought you another victim!"

There was no one else in the room. Was this one of Trevor's hallucinations? She pursed her lips a tad worried. How was she supposed to draw blood from a figment?

Trevor stuck his head back out the door, "Come on Merv! Let's get it over with!

It was a few moments before Merv proved to be a real person. The fastest god in the Universe crept in at the speed of dark with all the enthusiasm of a Hound Dog on his way to the Vet's. But wow!

Maggie stared up and up and up!. This guy was so big how was he going to fit in the chair? And it seemed as always, the bigger they were the more they were big Babies!

It was a tight fit but the Guy finally managed to sort of cram himself into the chair. He looked like he was about to faint in fear!

She readied her "weapon." Gently she pointed out, "I am using a butterfly needle, the smallest we have. It won't hurt all that much!"

Speak for yourself! Trevor thought. It matters a lot which side of the needle you are on!

Uncle Mercury was terrified but the poor dear did the best he could to be brave! He closed his eyes, gritted his teeth and gripped the arm of the chair with the hand not being stuck so hard it crumbled! Maggie could not believe her eyes as she stared at the remains of her chair!

After the dastardly deed was finally done, as the ancient god stared sadly at his wound Trevor gave him a hug. "You were brave, Merv!"

Feeling a little comforted and relieved it was over, Merv nodded.

The two friends and family members went out together, holding hands.

So what if Americans did not understand? They were ancient Greeks?

A week later they were back in Dr. Greeley's office. He reviewed the results. "I am afraid to tell you that wasn't it, folks. Mercury does not have any kind of heavy metal poisoning including mercury poisoning. (Wouldn't that have been ironic!) But we are back to square one again."

Uncle Mercury looked like he was going to start crying.

Dr. Greeley's heart went out to him. The guy was over 8000 years old with a potentially immortal life span and yet it was impossible not to feel sorry for him! He just seemed so...Human and so vulnerable. He could tell the guy was really worried about the future of his family as well as himself! How much more Human could that be?

Reassuringly the Psychiatrist said, "You know Uncle Mercury, I would bet my license that what you have is an artificially acquired condition not genetic. Your son is brilliant. Your Granddaughter seems so too. The chances of this being inheritable don't look high."

Yes. That made his strange Patient feel much better!

But what had caused it?

What do gods do that Mortals don't do? They fly. They throw thunder bolts! Electricity! ECT sometimes causes temporary memory loss. Lightning bolts which were a lot more electricity had been known to cause permanent brain damage. But did the gods throw those bolts at each other?

Dr. Greeley closed his eyes and stared at the ceiling, remembering Trevor Pierce's case file and Claire's comments about him. He remembered years back to Claire's amazement at some of her new Patient's 'confabulations.' "He says 'Mount Olympus is full of folks yelling and screaming at one another and throwing thunder bolts at one another but they love one another. It's a lot like New Jersey!' He actually said that! He has some kind of non-schizophrenic, 'Psychosis Not Otherwise Specified,' but he has an amazing sense of humor!"

So the gods did throw thunder bolts at one another!

Gently Dr. Greeley asked, "Uncle Mercury did you ever get in a fight with another god and get zapped?"

Uncle Mercury nodded, "Yes. Lots of times. My brother Mars and I have been at each others throats since we were Kids. Most of it was jealousy over our mutual love and lust for Trevor's Mom. We zapped each other so many times we lost count! Vulcan was jealous too and vice-versa. He was Aphrodite's first husband. But because of his conditions we didn't hurl at him like Mars and I did each other."

Bingo? Dr. Greeley thought to himself. Maybe. "Does Mars show any of the same memory problems?"

Trevor said, "It would be hard to tell. My Pops doesn't seem to care for learning like my branch of the family."

"Does he have any temper problems?"

Cupid shook his head, "Surprisingly no. He gets all his anger out at work and comes home tapped out for that sort of emotion. With my Mom he's as meek as a Lamb and while he is extremely disappointed with me to the point it broke my heart that I turned out to be such a Pacifist and resents that I'm not his sperm he never hit me in anger or anything like that. He banged me with the door one day when I was a toddler, just 500 years old but that was a complete accident. Even I knew that though I cried of course. He picked me up and comforted me and apologized. It's actually one of my better memories now because he didn't hug me much, just that day. I remember wishing he'd bang me with the door again so he'd hug me again. I'd hang around it hoping but the incident had taught him to be more cautious so he'd just catch me there and just yell at me for being in a dangerous part of the house. So I'd go over and play by and with the nukes. They were safer for a little kid to play around and with than a door."

Dr. Greeley stared at Trevor open mouthed.

Trevor shrugged. No! Really they were safer than playing around the kitchen door. There was no way a little Kid, even a god-kid could set them off. It was not like they had sharp points like Pop's collection of spears, swords, knives and baronets. Mom eventually made Pops get rid of all of those but we kept the nukes for centuries. We used them as footstools and end tables."

Dr Greeley had to ask! "What eventually happened to them?"

Trevor said, "If I recall correctly Mom eventually made Pops ditch the nukes too but mostly because they clashed with the decor. Mom is like my Wife in that way too. They both like art deco."

"That's good they were gotten rid of."

Trevor shuttered "Not necessarily. I don't even want to know who he gave them to!"

Dr. Greeley had no answer to that! But, "concerning the lightning bolts," Dead end? "Uncle Mercury do you remember any feelings of faintness or headaches after he zapped you?"

Uncle Mercury nodded, "Yes. Lots. I always seemed to feel it more than Mars did. Plus he zapped me a lot more than I zapped him. I'm a lot like my little squirt. I find violence hard. Well maybe not as much as he does, but some. But the god or war has no problems laying it on thick even with a fellow god who is his brother."

Dr. Greeley smiled, "Folks I think that's it! Those jolts fried your brain a bit Uncle Mercury. It's sad for you but I don't think anyone has to worry about Delightful or even Trevor getting a late onset case of it. He's definitely a lover not a fighter and down here there is no one to zap him anyway."

Trevor frowned, "Except you Shrinks!"
Dr. Greeley said gently, "Trevor, ECT uses a lot less electricity and it does help certain Patients but you aren't a Candidate for it anyway, especially now that I know you really aren't delusional and hallucinating. If any Doctor tries to do that to you show him Uncle 'Merv' and explain what it did to him or have him or her come talk to me. I'll also make a note in your files that ECT is contra indicated in you because there may be an inherited extra risk to being exposed to electricity."

The look on the older god's face was priceless. It was a mixture of relief for Delightful's future, sorrow at his own state, and anger at what his brother had done to him!

Dr. Greeley said, "Uncle Mercury we can talk about it any time you want to, well almost any time. You should make an appointment first. I do have other Patients."

Uncle Mercury nodded. Dr. Greeley was pleased to note relief was winning out over the other choices in Mercury's feelings.

So Dr. Greeley made his notes about the Father and Daughter's relationship. "Trevor Pierce is friendly, trusting and cooperative with the the Staff and isn't afraid to seek help for his family and himself when they need it. I suspect much of Delightful Pierce's accelerated development comes from the Father never talking down to the Child or expecting any less or more than the Child can give. However despite his own brilliance and the brilliance of his Child he is compassionate to those less mentally endowed and is teaching that compassion to his Baby."

Eli Stone was very surprised when a mute Autist in the ward handed him a huge pile of papers. This was a little Guy who spent most of his time huddling alone in the darkest corner of the harmless ward, trying to hide behind a potted rubber plant, rocking and staring at the ends of his fingers. The kindhearted Lawyer hadn't even realized the Man could write or that he was aware of the world around him. But it turned out to be a word for word listing of hours of "Cupid's" discussions with Delightful and and an accurate description of their behaviors together. Eli had seen better handwriting but it was at least readable. The Man would have made a great behavior researcher and yet was considered incompetent due to muteness and harmless but "odd" behaviors. Eli suddenly realized just how much Lawyers like him were needed! There was really no reason to keep him locked up! How many more like him were there in mental wards all over the planet?"

Gently he knelt down before the little Guy and asked, "Do you want me to help you get out?"

The Man did not look at him. He kept staring at the end of his fingers. Eli waited patiently sensing that the conversation wasn't over. Suddenly he started scribbling in his yellow pad. The note read, "No. I like it here. I like my Doctors and the Nurses and Orderlies. I like the other Patients and they need me to pray for them. I help chase away the demons."

Eli smiled, "Well then, carry on!"

There were over 500 disturbed souls in Ward's C and D but the harmless ward was mostly happy and serene, full of Folks either getting better or content with their lot. How could he be sure the little Guy wasn't chasing away demons?

Surely he wasn't the only one picked by God to do His works?

That opened up a flood gate of observations from the other Patients in the B Wing. Eli suddenly had Schizophrenics, OCD sufferers and even Depressives handing him their observations. Well, why not? They spent more time in the ward observing Trevor Pierce than the Staff did. Eli read them, chuckling at their content. Many were very insightful. Even a couple of word salads sort of stayed on topic in a loose sort of way. One gentle, well behaved Schizophrenic pointed out something no one else had noticed. Trevor was teaching Delightful to read by teaching her one letter a day on the Lap top!

No one else but a Man who spent almost every waking moment facing the wall, quietly talking in word salads at his voices had even noticed that.

The Trials Of Trevor Pierce Part I

The Custody Battle

Trevor and his Wife were in Claire's office. Eli was the one behind the desk for a change. Claire had vacated her spot to this different kind of Professional and was sitting next to her Husband on the hot seat. The practical minded Psychotic was incredulous, "They are determining our fitness as Parents before they determine if I broke the law or not? And they call me crazy?"

Eli gave his Clients a rueful smile and nodded in agreement at the insanity of it."It would make more sense of course to have your breaking and entering and kidnapping trial before the custody battle but who says Reality Space makes sense? But consider this. For us this is very fortunate. If they do convict you of breaking and entering or kidnapping your time in prison would be lengthy but not permanent. But if they take Delightful away from you that would be permanent! Better you aren't already serving a sentence behind bars before we have to prove your fitness as a Father!"

Eli continued, "And Trevor what I am about to say now may upset you. But it is my professional advice that you not go to the custody hearing."

Eli was a a bit amazed. Trevor actually looked angry! It was the first time he had ever seen the gentle Lunatic riled about anything.

Eli said gently, "I'm sorry Trevor. I know! I know! You want to be there! You are not as crazy as People think you are. But my professional instincts tell me your chances of getting custody of Delightful back are much better if you don't go to the hearing! You would be under oath and the opposing Attorney would have a field day with your being from Olympus when he cross examined you. They'd ask you questions about being a former god, about your conversations with Uncle Mercury, about your belief that Delightful is a goddess, your belief that Claire is Psyche and that someday all three of you are going back to Olympus. Oh they wouldn't let it rest! They'd keep reminding the Judge over and over again of these pertinent facts."

Eli added, "Not to mention the Judge is likely to order you into a different mental health facility if he doesn't like you. He's a hanging Judge, Trevor. He's been known to do that!"

Trevor bowed his head in sorrow and closed his eyes, "It isn't fair! She's my Kid too!"

Gently Claire said, "It will be over with very soon Trevor, I promise and we will get to keep her!"

Trevor nodded, "Oh that is absolutely certain! As a god my patience is running thin. Either the courts give us our Baby back or we are out of here, Claire Bear! Mercury will fetch Delightful and she and I will leave together, and you can freak out about it and then decide to either join us immediately on Mount Olympus or wait until you die to join your Husband and Daughter again. Because Delightful is not going to ever again betaken away from me until she is grown and some young buck asks for her hand in marriage and even then I won't be happy!"

Claire frowned, "I thought you said you couldn't go back to Olympus until your family lets you?"

Trevor shook his head,"If they try to take Delightful away from us, my family will let me, Claire Bear! That would change the entire parameter! Just hope it doesn't come to that!" He enfolded his Wife in his powerful but gentle arms and gazed into her sky blue eyes with his dark-as-coal ones. Gently he said, almost whispering, "I love you so much! Protecting and saving Delightful is the only thing that would make me even consider leaving you even temporarily, Claire! But I think you understand!"

Gently Claire said, "I understand Trevor. I just don't believe you! You are delusional as always! In fact if didn't know you better what you just said sounds like a murder and suicide threat." She turned to Eli, "Sir, it isn't!"

Eli nodded, "I know that Claire. Don't worry. I do!"

But they gave one another a very worried look. If the Pierce family lost custody of their Daughter or he went to prison, would Trevor go completely off the deep end?

Mercury leisurely walked besides Claire's car as it traveled at 70 mile speeds to the Courtroom.

He was going mostly to observe. He was the only one going who realized his son was not delusional. Thus he was the only one who would send back a complete and accurate report of the matter. His son's Wife and Lawyer would sugar coat their reports back to spare their "Mentally unstable" Husband and Client the distressing details.

But the god of love needed and deserved to know the entire truth however horrible!

At the courtroom Mercury swung his head around and stared with distaste and fear. Such a place was not familiar to him. He didn't hone in to court rooms in Reality Space or watch court room dramas. He was not a fan of Perry Mason or Matlock or CSI. Shows where Mortals tried to lock up other Mortals terrified him! Mercury was a free spirit even more so than his son. He needed to be wild and free! The entire Universe was his playground. The thought that any Being saw it OK to confine another Being to a few feet of space was a nightmare to the gentle spirit! If Mortals even needed to punish other Mortals instead of loving them or medicating them out of their wickedness why not just do what they used to? Give them a few whacks with a bamboo cane and let them go! Surely bad as that was it was at least less cruel than stealing so much of their finite time! What a horror to have only a limited time to exist! That they would steal from one another the thing they had the least of with jails and prisons and mental hospitals and classrooms full of boring lectures!

Oh thank God he was a god! Thank God he was FREE!

Mercury got behind Judge Sebastian Thomas and honed all his will and consciousness at the back of the Judge's brain trying to communicate his will to the very deepest instinctive part of the Man whose judgment would decide the fate of his beloved family. But Mercury had little hope it would work. Mortals were notorious for not listening to the prayers of gods!

Mercury also put in a few prayers to the "Big Guy." It couldn't hurt!

He wasn't the only one doing that.

Lita and Hector and Felix were also praying to Jesus. Claire was as usual praying to "Whom it may concern" and back at the hospital Dr. Greeley was praying to the Omega Point which was just Jesus at the other side of the Time Circle from the Bethlehem Insertion.

Isaac being Black and contemporary got his religion from Lion King. He was praying to his Ancestors.

But all were part of the same Great Mystery.

The Social worker was allowed to state their side of the story first. "Your Honor this is a clear case of failure to thrive brought on either by neglect, or emotional abuse, or both. The Father has been observed in public ranting at the Infant in several different languages some of which may not even be real. I am sure the Child doesn't understand him yet, despite claims she is linguistically precocious and becoming multilingual. But it doesn't matter. We can be sure the Infant understands his tone of voice."

Eli said, "I object. Conjecture and hearsay unless you have overheard Trevor ranting at his Daughter yourself."

The Social worker continued, "Your Honor the reason for pulling the Child from her unsuitable environment..."

"I object!" Eli said quickly.

"The Judge said, "Madam you will refrain from unvalidated opinions. This custody hearing is to determine if the Pierce residence is an unsuitable environment."

"Your Honor I apologize. Rephrasing. The reason Delightful was removed from the Pierce's custody was based on a complaint he was heard repeatedly ranting at his Daughter. That is what we do; investigate complaints. We did so. While I did not personally observe him ranting we discovered the Father has a severe psychosis and is currently under psychiatric care and has been for decades without any progress. In fact his mental health has deteriorated."

Eli calmly pointed out, "His treatment consists of counseling Your Honor. And he cooperates fully."

The Social Worker continued, "But that is only because there is no medication available to treat his kind of psychosis. The Man thinks he is a Greek god, Your Honor and that his Wife and Daughter are the same!"

The Judge gave a long, low whistle.

Eli said, "That is not entirely accurate Your Honor. My Client claims no powers or special abilities. He believes he was a Greek god in the past and will be so again someday and that his Wife SOMEDAY will be a goddess. He does not think that he or is Daughter can fly so there is no danger he would jump out of a window or hurl his Child out of one for the same erroneous reason. He knows perfectly well he has to follow the same laws of physics and biology as the rest of us. In fact is mastery of the laws of Physics is astounding! I will provide evidence for this statement later if you wish. Really it boils down to him having a strange set of religious beliefs and that is all. And his beliefs are just as harmless and comforting to him as garden variety Christianity and Judaism are to many of the rest of us, and they do not get in the way of his functioning."

The Social Worker frowned, "He hallucinates frequently and often publicly and very loudly! Plus The Child weighed only two pounds when we rescued her. She was 13 months old but she weighed less and still weighs less than some Preemies."

Eli said, "Your Honor, her weight is of considerable concern, but she gained weight while in the Pierce's care, lost four precious ounces when under state care, and now that she is back in her Father's care she has managed to put an ounce of it back on."

The Social Worker said, "her putting weight back on is questionable."

Eli said, "We have visual proof of that Your Honor."

The Social Worker pointed out, "But he still hallucinates interacting with other Greek gods and he has been known to do so loudly and in public."

Eli sighed.

Claire said, "Your Honor may I jump in here?"

The Judge nodded, "By all means Mrs. Pierce."

Claire firmly corrected him."Dr McCrae. I am a Psychiatrist who specializes in therapy. My Husband was my Patient before I relinquished that role to another Therapist and married him. So I know him both professorially and in the Husband and Wife sense. I have known him for over 18 years. I realized very soon after he was under my care he wasn't the usual Psychotic. He isn't Schizophrenic. His social skills are excellent and the usual fear and emotional disturbance those poor souls usually have is missing. He's humorous, cheerful, cooperative and friendly. He sleeps soundly, better than I do actually. His aptitudes are off the charts. When I tested him in the hospital he finished each test way too soon for us to get an accurate idea of his actual IQ. Whatever it is it is higher than any ever recorded before! But what is most important is though Trevor has all the positive symptoms of a severe psychosis he has none of the negative ones. It is negative symptoms that keep most Psychotics from functioning. By negative symptoms mostly I mean a loss of executive function. In Layman's terms that means most Psychotics are extremely disorganized. They can't set goals for themselves that they can follow through. You can give them a list of tasks and maybe one or two items on the list will get done if that much. Some Psychotics are so impaired they need supervision to get dressed and to take care of personal hygiene. Those often find mental hospitals a very good deal. Many are content someone else is going to take care of them and manage their affairs. They don't have the trapped Tiger look my Husband had when he told me the way I could help him was to get him out of there. When I saw that look I realized there was actually a chance for him despite the severity of his break from reality. This one was willing to work at it, do whatever it took to get free again. Unfortunately that included lying that his delusions had faded, but maybe it is a good thing he lied. It did get him out of the hospital and he didn't need to be there. Because your Honor my Husband definitely does NOT lack executive functioning. Despite almost constantly hallucinating his divine family he manages his affairs just fine and also now the Tres Equis Bar, which actually makes him a real Executive. I can leave Delightful with him and know she will be getting excellent care. If anything he's too attentive. Our Child is in severe danger of being spoiled but she certainly wasn't being neglected. We are terribly worried about her lack of weight gain but she lost four badly needed ounces away from us and already put back on an ounce now that she's back under our care."

Eli held up a lap top. "His social skills are indeed excellent and he is a compassionate, gentle and amazingly, wise. You Honor we have two You Tube videos here that show the progress the Child made after her return to the Pierce family. In the first one it is very obvious her ribs are showing. In the second one this is not so obvious because she has put back on a little weight. Also significant is they are narrated by Trevor Pierce. It was his idea to make them and he edited and uploaded them completely by himself under his account. You will get a good idea of both his delusions and his abilities from watching these. As his Wife states quite often, he sounds mad but acts sane."

The Judge watched. His eyes widened at the last scene in the second video where Delightful said right into the camera, "I want to stay with Cupid! Mommy! Felix!"

The Judge said with both amazement and concern. "She talks! But she calls her Father, 'Cupid.'"

Eli nodded, "I am afraid so Your Honor. I didn't say he was a perfect Father. He is obviously influencing her world view towards his. But she's deeply loved and knows it and she's intellectually stimulated and she's putting weight back on."

Eli then brought out all the observations. "Please note this large collection of papers. These are notarized statements from entire Psychiatric Staff of the Hospital where he is currently staying with Delightful, mostly for her sake. Every single one of them speaks positively of his relationship with his Daughter and his ability to raise her." He held up a second set of papers. "Here I also have non-notarized papers from most of the Patients on his ward and amazingly many of them are very insightful. The Patients spent more time with their fellow Patients than the Staff did so they observed things that the Staff didn't notice. And they also speak glowingly of Trevor Piece's paternal skills and instincts."

The Judge said, "I am still concerned about his loud talking to his hallucinations in public. Doesn't he at least have more insight than that?"

Claire said, "Your Honor I have an explanation for that. He works at a bar and for decades he has been its biggest and most successful Promoter. He single-handedly kept it open during the 9/11 recession. One of the ways he did it was with zany stunts, incredible dart and bottle juggling and his loud and public proclamations of god hood. Like a Used Car Salesmen's zany commercials he is actually exploiting his illness to bring in business. In fact he functions so well and is so calm when he isn't in public putting on a show I suspected at one point that was all there was to it, that it was an act, that he had cured himself without telling anyone and he was just malingering to get personal and professional attention. So at his own insistence we had him take a polygraph test which unfortunately he passed with flying colors. You can watch that on You Tube also if you like. He uploaded that as he does a lot of stuff to promote the bar. So he does believe he is a god, yes, and he does talk to his invisible family publicly and loudly, yes, but that last behavior isn't due to lack of insight as to how it makes him appear. He knows! But he's milking it for all its worth to bring in business. Plus now he's Manager and has even more motivation to do so. There is method in his madness, Your Honor."

The Social Worker said, "Remember he was reported to us as ranting at the Child."

Claire continued, " My Husband doesn't angry rant at Delightful, Your Honor. He happy rants. He definitely does NOT have an anger problem. Just the opposite. He is very laid back when he isn't exploding like pop corn with joy as he puts it, 'for having won the sperm race.'" She smiled, "Trevor sees things larger than life. Everything is a grand, eternal adventure to him. The flip side of his thinking himself a once and future god is he treats my Daughter and me like goddesses! And he treats mere Mortals with incredible patience and compassion because after all they are only what they are and it's the supernatural's fault they aren't better so why blame them? So I have never even seen him get get really furious at anyone except the social worker here who took Delightful away from us and he didn't hurt her. Other than that I've seen him get a little miffed a few times, but that is the extend of it."

The Judge asked, "But how does he treat you, his fellow gods? Might his higher standards for your behavior and your Daughter's make him less patient with his own family?"

Claire smiled broadly, "Oh his theology is delicious! He thinks Time circles. So while "the gods" created Mortals, far in the future Mortals created the gods! So when a god acts less than stellar his attitude is exactly the same. It's not the gods fault they aren't better because mere Mortals made them the way they are so why blame them either?" Claire smiled, "My Cupid does 't believe in perfection. He believes in Who he calls 'The Big Guy' too, but according to Trevor even the 'Big Guy' is struggling and doing the best anyone can with imperfect materials and imperfect Beings who were actually His own Ancestors due to circling time so we are literally grandfathered in despite our considerable faults. To Trevor even this Stranger on the Bus is just muddling along tired and frustrated, and He needs everyone's love and encouragement and we should cut Him some slack!"

Mercury started dancing in joy because the Judge was actually impressed!

The Judge said, "That's amazing! You Husband ought to write a book. You do realize Einstein taught time circles too?"

Claire nodded, "Living with my Husband has made such knowledge unavoidable. He's already read a book about General Relativity and the eclipse observation that proved it, to Delightful. Plus the Gospel of Thomas verses 18 and 19 also say, 'where the end is there the beginning is.' The first chapter of Ecclesiastes also refers to circling time, So King Solomon, a Genius Mathematician, my Genius Psychotic and Jesus all agree about curved Space/Time. Weird isn't it?"

The Judge smiled, "Have you considered the possibility your Husband might really be from Olympus?"

Claire sighed, "In my crazier moments your Honor. Usually around 4 or 5 AM in the morning!

"He is at least wise."

Claire nodded, "I've heard that one quite a few times. I agree with you he ought to write a book. I'll encourage him too. He listens to me. 'The Universe according to Cupid Pierce.' It could go in the science fiction section at least!

Claire continued, "I myself wrote a book about him and I've been trying to write a sequel for years. The first one about my now husband and ex patient was my fourth best seller and there is talk of a movie. I may point out both its sequel and any book my husband would write would no doubt sell very well also and leave Delightful Pierce very well off. Plus I've had My Child will not ever lack for material things and both of us dote on her."

The Judge smiled, "Write a book together. One chapter by the Shrink. The next by the Crazy Person. Some chapters together when you can agree on things, or even when you do not. You WILL have a best seller!"

Claire nodded, "I will suggest that to him."

Then Judge Sebastian Thomas asked, "You said he doesn't have Schizophrenia. What kind of psychosis does he have?"

Claire said, "I am fairly certain he has Dissociative Identity Disorder, what used to be called Multiple Personality Disorder which often gets mixed up with Schizophrenia by the Public but it is not the same thing at all. Schizophrenics have organic brain problems and seldom can function but Multiples often function just fine or better than what they call Singlets. That would explain my Husband's hyper-competency. There is a neurodiversity movement amongst them to have DID declared just a normal variation on the theme instead of mental illness just as Homosexuals demanded this and many mild and not so mild Autists are demanding. Since many of them function magnificently they might have a point. The condition may be more common than is thought. Not every alternate personality is going to pick a weird point of origin for its confabulated past, and some may chose to fake being the original host as Trevor sort of does sometimes. So most may not even get diagnosed. I've seen Trevor many a time introduce himself to People who do not know him merely as 'Trevor Pierce' and carry on long conversations, in a few cases multiple days worth and the other party couldn't tell there was anything different about him. He can do it. It depends on his mood I guess. For instance the Dentist who cleans his teeth didn't know his Patient thinks himself a once and future god until he just happened to catch one of my Husband's You Tube videos because Trevor didn't want to be completely sedated like they do most Psychotic Patients just to have his teeth cleaned. By the way my Husband takes such good care of his teeth he's never had a cavity so that is the only reason he goes to the Dentist. So I was not able to use dental records to trace his true origin."

Curious the Judge asked, "What did the Dentist do when he found out?"

"The next time he saw my Husband he just asked him a bunch of questions about Olympus as if the place really existed and cleaned his teeth as usual. Some folks react like that. Others freak out and don't want to have anything more go do with my Husband. Most just change the subject really quickly and are relieved when Trevor "fools" for that and talks about something else in a perfectly normal manner. Believe me sir he isn't being fooled but he's cool with that technique for managing him. Like most methods it just makes him grin or outright belly laugh at folk's silliness for not believing such an 'obviously true statement that he is from Olympus.'" Claire sighed, "Trevor understands most 'modern Mortals' don't believe in the gods or that he was one and will be one again. But he doesn't really understand why. But both his Therapist Donna and I keep working on him and there is always hope for a breakthrough."

"But he also hallucinates?"

"Claire explained, "The so called hallucinations are really still more personalities. Uncle Mercury obviously does have a mind of his own and isn't just a Schizophrenic-like voice. He's actually given my Husband some good advice and is always a comfort to my Husband while Schizophrenics voices usually terrify them and have bad things to say or don't make sense. I have never caught my Husband when Uncle Mercury is in control of his body but I know it happens in the middle of the night because horrendous amounts of food keep disappearing and Uncle Mercury gets the blame."

"Would Uncle Mercury harm Delightful?

Clair shook her head. "Not likely at all. DIDs's are usually sane. Uncle Mercury thinks he is Delightful's grandfather. I had to make Trevor promise to demand of him he never try to pick up or take care of the Child. That hurt their feelings but they promised and I believe they will both keep their promise."

Judge Sebastian Thomas said, "I want to meet the Child myself before I make my determination. Please have her brought into my presence tomorrow when court reconvenes at Nine AM." He tapped his gavel. "Court dismissed."

Back at the Mental Hospital Eli told Trevor, "The Judge wants to meet Delightful. That is a very good thing. Your verbose Child will have a chance to advocate for herself!

Claire frowned and shook her head, "Delightful doesn't talk much around Strangers unless her Daddy is with her. I don't know how we can get her to speak up."

Trevor nodded and eyed Uncle Mercury, a twinkle in his eyes. "Yes. If only there were a way!"

Uncle Mercury grinned, "Gee! If only some other god family member she is comfortable with could go with her and encourage her to talk!"

Cupid laughed.

Eli stared at him, Your Daughter is in jeopardy. What could possibly be funny?"

Trevor grinned, his eyes twinkling, "You forget I'm a 'Lunatic.' My favorite hallucination just made a wonderful suggestion! I am quite sure Delightful is going to be speaking up a storm tomorrow to the nice Judge!"

Eli gave him a compassionate look, "You act so rational most of the time I forget about your condition. I'm sorry Trevor! At this point in Reality Space which is all I've got to go on, things don't look hopeful!"

Again Trevor smiled a mysterious and smug smile.

As they entered the courtroom the tall god ducked his head at the door and walked besides his granddaughter as her Mommy carried her. Mercury said, "Delightful usually I would tell you to be polite and not speak to a Mortal unless they invite you too. All gods should always be like that. I'm not saying we are all like that but the good ones are! The bad ones won't shut up and get Mortals locked up like your Father is! But if you don't speak up unannounced you will not get a chance to tell you side. So the minute they put you on the Judge's desk look him straight in the eye and tell him what you think of what was done to you!"

The Child's green eyes were dark with worry, "Scared!"

Mercury said with Child like honesty, "Meee tooooo! But if they don't let you go back to Cupid and Mommy I'll rush you out of here. The Mortals won't understand how you suddenly disappeared but there is NO way we gods are losing you again! Someone in the family is watching you every moment and I will stay with you through this whole trial. If Venus wants a message delivered to Mars she can just go take it herself or Vulcan can take it for all I care! That's how I feel about that! But actually they want me to stay focused on you or with you at all times. We won't make the same mistake twice!"

Solemnly Delightful nodded.

The minute Delightful was placed on his desk the little red-haired goddess stared at the Judge with her deep green eyes. She begged as loud as she could, "Judge! Please! Cupid! Cupid! Cupid! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Felix! Felix! Felix! Cupid! Felix! Please Cupid! Please Mommy! Please Felix!"

Gently the Judge said, "Honey your father loves you but he isn't a suitable role model for you."

Delightful said, "Poo! Poo! Poo!"

The Judge frowned, "Young Lady if you were older I would hold you in contempt for using any reference to manure in a courtroom. But since you are just a Baby!"

The Baby's eyes narrowed. The Judge had never seen that look on a Baby before. "I live with Cupid! Mommy! Felix! I love milk! I live with Francine Donaldson. Tom Donaldson. Others. I hate milk! Understand Delightful?"

The Judge frowned. "Is that a threat?"

Delightful shook her head and frowned, "No. Sick."

A little more compassionately the Judge explained, "That's because you were around your sick Father."

"No. Because Delightful was not!"

Gently the Jude said, "I was told he raves at you. Does he rave at you? Because no Baby or even older Folks should have to put up with that!"

Delightful frowned and shook her head, "No. Cupid talks fast. Not angry. Fast. Difference! Many words! I understand fast. Many words. Others slow! Bore, bore bore! Want Cupid, Cupid, Cupid!"

The Judge was amazed but not convinced, "Young Lady just the fact you call your Father, 'Cupid' instead of something normal like 'Daddy' is indicative of the problem. He's dragging you down into his psychosis."

Claire said, "Your Honor may I speak?"

The Judge shrugged. "Go ahead."

"As a trained Mental Health Professional I can give accurate information here. Despite my Daughter's precociousness, she is just a Baby. All Children up until around 4 to 6 and sometimes even older have no ability whatsoever to tell reality from fantasy. They believe in Santa Claus and Aliens and Atomic particles with equal credence. It's not going to hurt her to think her Daddy is a once and future god for the first few years of her life. All Children do that anyway in a manner of speaking. When she gets older there is going to be a moment of revelation and a real crisis there. She'll feel betrayed and feel that her Daddy was lying to her. I see it coming! But I already obtained a Therapist for her who is seeing her on a regular basis or at least she was before Delightful was taken away from us. So she already has a strong therapeutic bond with someone who can guide her through that crisis when the time comes. In the meantime the Therapist is just basically acting as a Grandmother, rocking her in a rocking chair and telling her over and over again how wonderful ordinary Humans are so when she finally realizes that is all her Daddy is and all he ever will be and she realizes that is all she ever really will be it won't be such a let down to her. Also soon as we feel she is getting old enough to understand we are going to start intensively but gently explaining her Daddy's mental condition. So you see I prepared for Delightful's future. I'm on top of the situation already!"

Delightful looked at Uncle Mercury, made eye contact and giggled. She knew better than what her Mother was saying!

The Judge unfortunately noticed that, "Delightful who are you giggling at?"

"Mercury!" Delightful said happily and innocently. Smart as she was she wasn't really able to comprehend Mercury was invisible to the others.

Claire's face exploded in horror. "You can see Uncle Mercury too?"

"Yes. Si. Ni. Wi." said Delightful calmly.

The Judge stared at Claire who was staring at her Child with a look of horror. He said, "Madam you have a big problem here!"

She nodded, "I see that! I didn't realize Delightful was hallucinating too! But I am a trained Psychiatrist with the determination of a Mommy with a sick Child! If anything the need of my Daughter to be with her family is more pertinent than ever!"

The Judge was very skeptical. "Do you believe that even though being around your Husband may be the cause of your Child's break with reality?"

Claire nodded and said vehemently, "No Your Honor! Most mental illness is heredity, more a case of nature than nurture. There are definite indications this condition is multigenerational. I've talked with my Husband's Mother and briefly met his Grandfather in the park one day for a few moments. They all seem to have a touch of this strange break with reality. 'The gods' really are their religious beliefs! It seems to color their world view and their sense of self but strangely it doesn't seem to impair their ability to function. If any thing my Husbands is hyper-competent and my Daughter's is precocious and if my Mother In Law is telling the truth Trevor Pierce's family is very powerful and influences world affairs. Their illness seems to drive their functionality instead of impeding it. And if it is multigenerational it is best dealt with on a multigernational level!"

Claire said firmly, "I am going to get to the bottom of it! And no one has had as much experience at dealing with the Pierce family's problem as I have! My Husband keeps insisting all the time I'm going to end up being a Therapist to his whole pantheon of 'gods.' He may be right again, sort of. I am going to end up helping his whole family to get over this! I swear I will!" Her face got a very determined look. "And I might as well include my own Daughter!"

The Judge asked, "How do you explain that your Child can see Uncle Mercury if he is just an alternative personality of your Husbands'?"

Claire shuttered, "I haven't figured that out yet. I haven't had time! I just found out she had that problem a minute ago, remember? But I will figure it out!" Again she got a very determined look on her face!

The Judge nodded and smiled. (That was a good sign)! "Everyone has a calling, a reason why they are in this Universe. But yours is the strangest I have ever encountered!"

Claire nodded, "Yes. You Honor. But I am surrounded by Love. My Husband thinks he IS love, and, 'as a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.' He is out of touch with reality but there are components to his condition I hope I have the wisdom to leave alone! And being raised by a Man who thinks he's Love Incarnate certainly isn't disturbing his Daughter. He acts like what he thinks he is and other than their shared hallucination and delusion my Daughter is thriving."

"Yes! Si! Ni! Wi!" Agreed Delightful.

The Judge gazed at the Child and smiled. The Child was well named and her ability to talk was incredible! She didn't act like a Baby who was failing to thrive. She only looked like one. But the Father's condition was a big concern! And the Child was hallucinating too! What was this Man who thought he was Cupid really like? He had to find out for himself.

The Judge stated, "before I actually make my ruling I want to speak to this so called loving Father."

Eli said, "We felt it wise not to bring him."

The Judge was shocked, "You want him to be raising this Young Lady and you don't even trust him out of a mental hospital?"

Eli shook his head,"It is not that Your Honor. The type of information gathering done at a trial would show him at his worst. Yes and no questions answered for the offense would make him sound madder and more dysfunctional than he really is. Trevor Pierce is best understood by his actions not his words or proclamations of self god hood. Or if one does go by his words he needs to be allowed paragraphs worth to state his case. A passing statement makes him sound a candidate for permanent commitment. But if you listen to him closely and long enough the wisdom of the Man starts to show through. He actually has a lot of common sense. It is just very hard to tell without listening and observing closely."

The Judge said, "I will take him to my chamber and ask him questions myself. I'll let him go way beyond yes and no."

Mercury smiled. His prayers to the Big Guy and direct to brain talking was working! Smart Mortal!

Eli brightened. Claire breathed a sigh of relief. Mercury started dancing. Delightful went "wheeee! Yay!"

The Judge couldn't help chuckling at the Child's enthusiasm.

Eli nodded," "Thank you Your Honor! That would give my Client a fair chance to demonstrate he really is sane and competent though extremely unusual in his self and world view!"

The Judge checked his cell phone. "To bad it's Friday. We will have to reconvene Monday."

Uncle Mercury groaned. Three more days before we have a ruling! How long is this going to go on? The poor Kids!

Delightful broke into tears.

The Judge stared at her.

Eli explained. "She understood what you said, Your Honor. You just told her three more days before she knows her fate and she doesn't like it."

Uncle Mercury said gently in Greek, "Love Bug I'll be right back!"

He blinked out of there and Delightful went from soft crying to heavy sobbing.

Back in the mental hospital in a flash Uncle Mercury said to his little squirt, "Trevor go to the restroom and into a stall. We have to get to the courtroom NOW!"

Trevor grabbed his cell phone but left his lap top and ran as fast as he could.

Isaac said, "What?"

"The runs!" The fallen love god lied smoothly.

"Oh. what did you eat?"

Trevor shrugged, "Hell if I know!"

Isaac thought, mole sauce should not go on Greek salads!

Cupid ran in the restroom and into a stall. Playfully he flipped his cell phone open like a Star Trek communicator and said, "Beam me up Uncle Mercury!"

They were in the court room in less than a second.

Fortunately no one noticed his sudden appearance. Every one's attention was on the front of the courtroom.

Cupid ran down the aisle and scooped up his Child before anyone could stop him.

As usual incredible calmness overtook them both as they gazed into one another's eyes. Neither realized it but both the Child and he started glowing with a soft light like something out of a Renascence painting. Not to the point any divine attributes could be proven, but Claire and Eli could see it. And even the Judge and the Social Worker and the Offense Lawyer could see it! It was like the glow on the faces of some Christians except it was all over them.

Claire and Eli and the Judge exchanged glances back and forth between themselves about the divine father and daughter. The Judge shuttered. Like Claire he didn't like his belief in comforting nothingness shaken! But it was too obvious to ignore at least for a few seconds!

(A few good REM sleeps and their faith in nothing would be restored).

The Judge asked Claire, "I'll take it, this is your Husband?"

She nodded. The confusion she felt as to how he got out of the hospital shown on her face.

The Judge looked at Father and Daughter, "I admit he doesn't seem to be traumatizing the Child."

"Cupid! Cupid! Cupid! Yay!" Said Delightful.

Claire said, "That is what we have been saying. Trevor definitely does NOT hurt our Daughter. In fact his presence and actions in her life have accelerated her mental development. Remember she lost weight when she was away from us and gained weight when her Daddy and Mommy were back in her life."

Judge Sebastian nodded, "Trevor Pierce, Dr. McCrae and Eli Stone to my chamber immediately."

He noticed it was Trevor who continued to hold Delightful and brought her. The Mother didn't even make the slightest motion to take the Child away from her "crazy" Husband as if she knew she would have been the Child's second choice. Psychotic Father or not, this was Daddy's girl.

Delightful looked up at her Daddy and started chattering at him in Greek.

The Father chattered back. Then suddenly the preciousness and precariousness of the moment sunk in and they started communicating on a higher level. Faster and faster they talked back and forth! Each thinking "What if he really was merely crazy and there was no Olympus to flee too? What if after today we are never allowed to see each other again? Talk fast!" They were trying to get in a whole life time of interaction!

Politeness had kept their conversation at mere Mortal speeds before. But suddenly they felt no such restraints! They talked back and forth at the speeds only they could comprehend!

Judge Sebastian Thomas stared at them. So this was the so called ranting and raving! This wasn't being done in anger, but what was it being done in? And the Child was giving tit for tat!

Claire and Eli also stared.

This whirlwind of a conversation went on for several minutes. The Judge noticed how the child rested calmly in her Father's arms, how they stared into each others deep, deep eyes, how those eyes seemed to sense and communicate things about the Universe back and forth to one another the rest of the Universe was not privy to.

Finally they both slowed down and stopped, winded.

Trevor turned to the Judge and said with quiet defiance, "Sir even if you take Delightful away from me you can never stop her destiny! Someday my Daughter will rule Olympus! In every way you can possibly think of she will soar!"

It would have been harder to believe this madness if they weren't subtly glowing again.

But Judge Sebastian Thomas tried to keep the conversation rooted in reality. He tried!

Like any Judge would have done, he asked, "so you believe your Daughter will develop the ability to fly one day?"

Trevor frowned because he had insight enough to realize his answer would not make him look sane. But he would not lie under oath. Gently but firmly he said, "Yes, Your Honor."

The Judge frowned too, "So how does that work? Do you plan to toss her out a window one day in exactly the way your Lawyer said earlier you would not?"

Trevor shook his head vehemently, "Your Honor that would be like teaching a Mortal Child to swim by throwing her in the water! Now I have seen Mortal Children learn to swim that way. I have also seen Mortal Children develop a life long phobia about water that way and never learn to swim, and yes I've seen quite a few drown! When I assist in Delightful's first flight, if I even need to, (often they happen spontaneously Your Honor), she will be taking off from a level surface. That is the only safe way! And we certainly won't push her. When it happens, it happens. And if it never happens it never happens. That's OK by me too. Some half bloods never develop the ability to fly. Unless he's riding his Pegasus, Hercules for instance still walks every where he goes except when he is riding in his golf cart. I would say his quality of life is excellent anyway."

"Golf cart?"

Trevor explained, "We Olympians don't want to use gas engines because we would have to buy gas. We use electric golf carts. Because by using electric, like Fred Flintstone's big feet we can power our vehicles ourselves. We use a controlled thunderbolt. Or at least some of us can. It takes talent and practice to trickle-charge a battery instead of just throwing a bolt all at once. My Mother can. I could. Vulcan can but his leg hurts him too much to stand that long. My Father and Mercury never could. They don't have the patience for it. They ended up ruining quite a few batteries because they tried to charge them too quickly and at too high a voltage. Golf carts don't go as fast as gas engines of course but we live a very long time. We aren't in any hurry and Olympus isn't that big a place anyway. We only have three stop lights, one malt shop and a town square. We don't even have a shopping mall."

The Judge stared at Trevor who was looking back with obvious sincerity."

Claire said gently, "Remember I said my Husband sounds mad but acts sane. The only really relevant part of all of that colorful confabulation is that Delightful's Daddy is not going to be the least bit upset when it turns out her Daughter is permanently grounded and he won't be tossing her out any windows."

The Judge stared at Trevor who met him gaze for gaze, staring right back. His eyes didn't look crazy. They looked deep and full of love and hope.

Judge Sebastian Thomas said, "Mr. Pierce I see right through you!"

The hopeful Lunatic gazed at him, confused by that.

So did Claire and Eli.

The Judge gazed into Trevor's eyes as if he were gazing into the eyes of an Extraterrestrial Intelligence or a Whale. "It isn't stress that put you over the edge was it? It was something else!"

He turned to Claire, "Your husband really isn't out of touch with reality. I think your Husband's brain is just too big to cope merely with reality. He had to confabulate this alternate realm to add a little challenge to day to day coping. But under all the so called delusion the ability to cope with reality very well is most amazingly still there! It is just cleverly hidden. Inability to cope with stress isn't keeping him crazy. Boredom is. But he is truly crazy! But it's such a harmless, gentle, loving craziness ! My heart goes out to you dear! You are doing the best anyone could with him and your Daughter and it's a miracle you found each other, maybe even a real miracle from a real God!"

Claire's face brightened and she nodded, "Exactly your Honor. I never put it better myself!"

The Judge smiled, "I don't think he's any danger to his Daughter and your assessment is correct. They need each other desperately! I will go make my ruling now."

He got up and walked past them back to the bench.

The Social worker and the offense Lawyer frowned. They could tell from his demeanor what was coming.

He sat down, picked up his gavel and said, "Due to the unusual mental state of the Father, Trevor Pierce I am making it a condition of my ruling that both Father and Daughter continue indefinitely under psychiatric care and observation. But never-the-less I am ruling in the favor of the Pierce and McCrae family to maintain custody of their very unusual Daughter. The Child is precocious to the extreme and needs to be with those who have the necessary mental abilities themselves to stimulate her. There are worse things than harmless delusions and one of those things is loneliness for one's own kind. The Smart need to be with the Smart or they feel like Tarzan living with the Apes! That may have been a major factor in the Father's own descent into madness and by keeping the equally brilliant Daughter with the one Person in New York who may actually be intelligent enough to keep her from feeling the same way, we may actually me keeping her from following in her Father's psychotic foot steps!" Judge Sebastian Thomas banged his gavel with all the force he could manage into banging such a tiny hammer. "Court dismissed!"

The Child shrieked with glee!

Then and only then did Trevor hand his Daughter over to her Mother. He started Snoopy dancing around the courtroom and hive fiving some invisible entity.

The Judge didn't know what to make of that. He reconsidered but the ruling had been made!

Then Trevor hugged Eli Stone, giggling, "Fight for justice peacefully. Hug a Lawyer!"

Oh what the heck! Eli hugged the Lunatic back!

And so they had won!

Back in Thessalonia, Greece the valley-Mortals watched in amazement the next morning. It was a very bright and sunny, rainless day, dry and hot. But not I but a VII rainbows flashed across the very top of the ancient, craggy mountain, one right on top of another!

Fascinated every Mortal in the valley who owned a camera snapped picture after picture!

But when all the film was developed and the flash cards were inserted in computers not one rainbow showed!

Oh those clever gods!

On their way out to the car Claire snuggled her Daughter close. Trevor's strong arms were wrapped around them both and his eyes were closed. How he walked without tripping Eli could not tell. Claire could. Her gentle, crazy Husband was trusting her to guide him as she always did and always would in many, many ways! She asked, "Trevor I don't see any of the Orderlies with you. So how did you get out of the hospital and how did you get here right at the right moment?'

Trevor's eyes twinkled. "I plead the fifth!"

Claire frowned. Firmly she said, "Trevor we are not in court any more. You can't be pleading the fifth with your own Wife! We are not supposed to have secrets from each other!"

Playfully Trevor puckered his lips.

Claire sighed but gave into her Husband's need and desire to raise each other's oxytocin levels.

A bit more gently she said, "That softened me but it didn't stop me. I ask again. How did you get out of the hospital?"

Trevor tried to look inscrutable. That was a rare facial expression he could not manage.

"Trevor Cupid Pierce!"

Trevor sighed and made quote marks with his fingers. "I"ll tell you what I believe is the truth and you'll just be mad a different way at me for another 'psychotic delusion.'"

Claire sighed, "It involves Uncle Mercury doesn't it?"

Frowning, Trevor nodded.

She sighed, "I knew what you were when I married you. So I have no one to blame for what I am feeling about your inability to face reality, but myself! So it is up to me to change how I feel. Because you can not change, at least not yet. I still have hope! The important thing today is we have our Daughter back and it is doubtful anyone will ever take her away from us again considering all the publicity!"

Trevor hugged his Wife and Daughter and high fived his invisible companion. "And the bar just keeps getting more and more popular!"

Claire noticed his high fiving Mercury and forced herself to just be amused instead of worried.

After all they had just been through the most stressful situation any Parents could go through and while it was true her Trevor hadn't gotten any better he also hadn't gotten any worse. It was highly likely this was as bad as her Husband's psychosis would ever get. She took a deep breath and she leaned against him as they walked the rest of the way back to their car.

Of course they had won. How would he have been if they had lost? And would they win the next one? And if not, what would prison do to her sensitive, free-spirited, freedom-loving Lunatic?

Back at the Mental hospital Dr. Greeley and the rest of the staff were amazingly unperturbed about 'Cupid's Howling mad Murdock-like escape. In fact amazingly the usually uptight Dr. Greeley actually laughed, "It doesn't matter Claire. He came back. And I bet his timing for going to the trial was excellent."

She nodded, puzzled at her Boss's uncharacteristic complacency, "And of course he can't tell me how he got out or how he got there so quickly or how he knew that was the moment to be there. She made quote marks with her fingers, "It's 'Uncle Mercury's doing!' Of course!"

Her Boss just laughed some more!

A few minutes later Claire took her Daughter in the Ladies room for privacy.

Claire had never had such mixed feelings in her life! She had her Daughter back but the poor Baby was already manifesting the same seemingly comforting hallucination her Husband had! In her entire career she had never heard of such an case of folie a deuxing! Delusions could be shared but hallucinations?

Wryly she wondered if she could use Uncle Mercury as a Messenger between her Baby and her Husband? After all that was his job!

She hugged her Daughter close! "Little Lady we have to have a talk!"

"I talk!" Said Delightful cheerfully,

"About Uncle Mercury!"

The Baby giggled, "goofy!"

Claire stared at her Daughter amazed. "Uncle Mercury is goofy?"

The Baby giggled, "Yes! Very! Love Uncle Mercury! Uncle Mercury love Delightful!"

She stared at her Daughter, "How does he make you feel?"

"Safe. Loved. Happy! Home! Warm! Wanted! Giggly!"

She didn't have an answer to that!

In a world of chilling horrors and stress and panic maybe every Child needed an Uncle Mercury! But would she keep him into her Adulthood as her Husband had done? That was the worry!

Claire vowed to fill her Baby's life with REAL loving People and to do it as much as she could for her Husband too! Both of them seemed to have what Trevor called a huge "love tank" that was hard to keep filled. The secret she was sure, to weaning both of them away from this strange, shared hallucination was to find a real way to keep their "love tanks" filled.

But how? How do you compete with a goofy, eight thousand and ten year old giant from Mount Olympus who was, "faster than the starship Enterprise, taller than a telephone pole and with love the size of a galaxy?'"

She had watched her husband walking along looking up at his Giant friend. His eyes were full of stars of love and joy and he walked with the ease and grace of a contented soul. Uncle Mercury had done that for her Husband! She could remember his loneliness and homesickness before this gentle, wonderful figment showed up! In some ways maybe it was a strength and a blessing that Trevor could find such comfort from his own brain waves! It actually was a type of healing!

But the world usually didn't see things like talking with huge, imaginary, red haired, slow but wise giants as positive traits in an Employee! It was amazing what her Husband's Boss, Felix put up with !

If only Trevor could be made to understand that he had created Uncle Mercury! But of course that was the rub. He couldn't! And apparently neither could Delightful!

She wondered what Felix had planned for the bar if he died? Because where could her Husband possibly work if Tres Equis was no longer in business or it was left to a Person less tolerant of her Husband's torrent of "eccentricities?"

The Trials Of Trevor Pierce Part II

Breaking, Entering and Kidnapping, or Citizen's Arrest?

Felix had been amazed and bemused to be asked to come across the street and babysit Delightful in the harmless ward while her family fought Trevor's breaking and entering and kidnapping charge. He smiled, "While I am there what do I say to the Staff and the Patients? Won't I stand out being the only Normal Person there?"

Trevor laughed, "Boss. Don't worry. No one will be able to tell you apart from the Patients!"

Felix shuddered, "Now that would be even more embarrassing and a little terrifying! What if they don't let me out later?"

Cupid quipped, "Well the food isn't that bad."

"Trevor!" Claire scolded her mischievous husband.

The Lunatic god grinned, "Don't worry Boss I'll vouch for you when it gets time for you to leave!"

With mock humoring Felix said, "Of course they will believe you! A Mental Patient who is also the Greco-Roman god of love certainly has credibility in a mental hospital as to who and who is not allowed to leave!"

Claire laughed, "Don't worry Felix. I will vouch for you too." She winked. "Surely they will believe one of us!"

Trevor backed up this idea, "There you go Felix. She's even more out of touch with reality than I am. But she has the fancy degrees so they will at least believe her!"

Delightful was delighted to see her Uncle Felix again. "Felix! Felix Felix!" She screamed in delight. 'Félix! Te quiero! ¡Te amo! Leer por favor! Toda la Winnie Pooh! Lea por favor! Capítulo Tres, Don Quijote de Don Quijote sabe que mi padre sabe Crazy y el Carpintero Crazy sabe si uno puede amar con fuerza suficiente para atraer a otros a ti mismo, si usted puede soñar lo suficiente y el tiempo suficiente para que nunca rendirse, nunca se rindan! Otros alegremente hará el trabajo por usted y divina locura puede ser forjado con el fuego, tierra fértil y la pasión en realidad perfecta. Lea por favor! El capítulo dos, de origen de Darwin de las especies. porque sabía que crece la vid y las ramas y se podan y dirigida, y crece y las ramas de nuevo y se podan y se dirigió de nuevo todo el camino alrededor del círculo del Tiempo. Y la vida es tanto la Viña y el viñador de hierro con hierro se aguza y de la Vida agudiza la vida y el hombre su propia Predator, agudiza el hombre.

Lea por favor! Eclesiastés Capítulo 1. El sabio rey Salomón! Él sabe como Einstein sabe y mi Crazy Padre sabe que el tiempo es un círculo perfecto sin principio ni fin. Paseos en la vida de la rueda de la celda individual a Punto Omega atrapados para siempre por el amor: no se puede cambiar la vida de la célula para mejor o peor! O en el futuro sería diferente. Luego, el pasado sería diferente y luego otra vez el futuro sería diferente. A todos nos habrá ido! Lea por favor! Peter Rabbit. (Me gusta conejos). Lea por favor! (Así me entero de los mortales): Dear Abby. Lea por favor el Funnies! Necesito risa! Keep me abrazaba y yo no quiero a ir a comer puré nunca, nunca, nunca más!"*

Again Uncle Mercury walked besides the car as it rushed to the courthouse.

Was he going to have to do a jail break? Or would his Son walk away a free god that day?

Of course not completely free. He still was a psychiatric In-Patient. But that didn't' seem to bother Trevor as much the second time around. Maybe it was because Delightful was with him. That had to be it. He actually seemed to be doting on all the attention.

They got stuck in traffic! They didn't dare be late to the trial! Uncle Mercury resisted the urge to pick up and move cars out of the way. Instead he just prayed like a Mortal for the traffic jam to be over with in time.

And it was!

Thanks, Big Guy!

Judge Cindy Miller wasn't having a good day! She was a celiac and something in her lunch had wheat in it. She was sure of that and now her gut was telling her off royalty for her stupidity! Never trust a Waitress to tell you the truth about gluten unless you threaten to throw up if you eat it. Nothing else makes them even care!"

She had liked the young Lady! So she had been too polite and now for the next few weeks until her gut recovered from the damage the wheat flour had done she would pay for her temporary lapse of over-gentleness!"

She had used up her allotment of mercy for the day and it had cost her! Now to work!

Cindy picked up the folder in front of her concerning the Persons standing before her. New York versus Trevor Pierce. Charges; breaking and entering and kidnapping!"

Cindy hated kidnappers with a passion! Her Baby Sister had been take away in the dead of night and they had never seen her ever again!

She gazed at the the monster. (Whoops alleged monster!) He stood before her smiling hopefully. He had the audacity to smile at her! That would cost him!"

His baby faced Lawyer was about to be eaten for lunch as far as she was concerned! Too bad he hadn't been on the menu instead of the so called 'safe' potato soup!

She glared at the Lawyer, "How does your Client plead?"

The Client spoke up himself, "Your Honor I plead not guilty to the Kidnapping charge. To the breaking and entering charge I plead no contest because I really don't remember doing it."

She was incredulous, "Don't remember doing it?"

The Patient nodded sincerely, "No Ma'am."

She motioned for silence while she went over the file.

Her eyes softened. The Baby the Man had kidnapped was his own Daughter and he had taken her to a hospital. It seemed she was very tiny and frail and had lost four precious ounces while in state custody! The Man's motivation for the Kidnapping which his Lawyer was calling a "Citizen's Arrest" was genuine fear the Child was starving! The head of the Sachs-Gordon Medical Center Psychiatric Department had backed up the Man's theory!

Suddenly the Man's smile didn't seem so horrible! Neither did he seem anymore a monster!

She read further.

Eli and Claire and even "Crazy Trevor" could tell when she got to "that part" of the case file!

Her eyes widened. The Man himself had been Baker Acted right along with his Daughter! And the reason! She couldn't believe it! She had to ask the Man himself!"

"Trevor Pierce approach the bench!"

The Man did so, smiling hopefully at her like a Puppy who wanted to please.

Cindy glared at him, "You think you are the god of love?"

He corrected. "Former and future god of love. I'm currently between god-hoods Your Honor.'

Sarcastically she said, "Oh. That's OK then. If you WERE a god right now, this moment, I'm not sure we'd be legally able to try you!"

Bad timing for me. Cupid thought to himself.

"Mr. Pierce you are dismissed."

He stared at her, puzzled.

She explained, "Go back to your seat. I want to talk with your Lawyer!"

The baby faced beauty that approached the bench made her want to punch him in the nose just for being too pretty and too well connected!

She had worked her way through law school waiting on tables. She could tell this dandy never had to do such a thing!

She leaned down, "Why don't you just get this poor Fellow off on an insanity defense?"

He told her, "My Client is struggling to maintain custody of his Daughter, Your Honor. Such a stain on his record would not look good to New York Child Protective Services. He also doesn't qualify for an insanity defense. He knows right from wrong and we feel what he did was right. It is the opinion of several Doctors and Mental Health Experts and the Man himself it is highly likely his desperate actions saved his Daughter's life!"

She frowned, "I can see if the Child was losing weight there was a real concern here as to her foster placement but let's face it. Should a Man this deeply delusional be in custody of his Daughter?"

Eli reached in to his briefcase and put a pile of papers over an inch and a half thick on her desk. He said, "Your Honor these are notarized statements from every Mental Health Worker at the mental hospital where Trevor Pierce and his Daughter are being held for observation to determine his competency as a Father and to treat Delightful for the life threatening anorexia being separated from her family caused. The Director of the facility felt it best they stay together during their confinement and during this time his behavior towards his Daughter and her responses towards him were observed and carefully documented. During this time the Child also regained an ounce of the weight she had lost. To add a little spice to it, this collection of papers also contains testimony from all the fellow Patients on his ward who spent more time observing his interactions with his Daughter than the Mental Health Workers did! Notice I said 'every' and 'all.' He has spent six weeks there with dozens of eyes on him at almost every moment and the minds behind all those eyes, every single one, says he is a great Father! Both the Staff and his fellow Patients!"

Judge Cindy Miller was amazed. She asked, "Not one Person said he couldn't raise his Daughter?"

Eli smiled, proud for his Client, "Not one. He could win Father of the Year status according to what they observed.'

Cindy asked, "What about his Wife?"

"Right here your Honor!"

Cindy stared at the beauty before her, "You are married to a Man who thinks he's Cupid?"

She nodded proudly, "Indeed I am!"

"You poor dear! Why?" Couldn't this beauty have done better by herself?

The Lady gave a wry smile, "It's been a gift and a curse Your Honor!"

"Explain!"

The Lady smiled, "In many practical ways he is the god of love!"

Cindy laughed, "Oh."

The Man's Wife added, "And not just the way you are thinking. The Man does housework! My apartment is spotless! And he listens! And since he doesn't have omnipresence anymore he asks for directions!"

"May I remind you, you are under oath!"

Your Honor forgive me. That bit about omnipresence, that was my looking at it from his point of view. I didn't mean..."

"I gathered that, but he ASKS FOR DIRECTIONS?"

The court room tittered. Judge Cindy Miller decided to let that pass under the circumstances.

The Judge stared at Claire. "It seems to me if all you wanted was a clean apartment you could simply have hired a Housekeeper!"

The Beauty shook her head, "I was only using that as an example of his incredible hyper-competence. I didn't marry him for a clean apartment but it certainly is a nice extra!"

She added, "The real reason I married him is he is always there for me. Parents and other Boyfriends came and went when other things interested them more than me. But Trevor Pierce, my Cupid, in his mind at least, was willing to give up becoming a god again so he could stay with me in the Mortal realm! Yes he is delusional. But the love he feels that made him willing to do that, that love for me and our Daughter is VERY real, and I experience it every day in dozens of very real ways, of which a sparkling, clean apartment is but one manifestation!"

Judge Cindy asked, "How long have you been married?"

"About ten years your Honor."

"And you feel this Man is still in love with you?"

There were stars in the Beauty's eyes, and in the Defendant's. They said it together, "Yes, Your Honor!"

Judge Cindy bent her head and continued to read the file.

The house had been broken into and the Baby removed in the dead of night. The house had a very expensive alarm. It hadn't gone off in time to prevent the removal of the Infant.

The only sign of forced entry was a hole in a window roughly a foot wide and half a foot high. The broken glass was found only on the outside of the dwelling!

Huh?

She stared at Trevor Pierce mentally measuring him.

She said, "Trevor Pierce approach the bench again!"

The Man did so, again smiling like a hopeful Puppy.

Mr. Pierce how did you get through a foot long hole?

Trevor frowned, "I'm under oath aren't I?"

The Judge said quietly, "Yes Mr. Pierce you are under oath."

He stared into her eyes, "But if I tell what really happened you won't believe me. You will think I am either lying or being psychotic!"

"Mr. Pierce my patience is wearing thin! I repeat. The window glass was found on the outside of the house and the hole was too small for you to slip through. So how did you get in and out?"

Trevor sighed. Here it comes. "I was never in the residence."

The Judges eyes narrowed, "You weren't!"

Trevor did his best to explain what could not be explained, "My so called alternate persona was; Uncle Mercury! At least that's the official psychiatric explanation for him. To me he's my biological father and friend and like I was at one time, he's a god. So he can be incorporeal. So when he entered he didn't need to break anything for himself! He only made a Baby sized hole in the window to get Delightful OUT!"

The Judge was furious!

Trevor amazingly was able to say something to defend himself. "You Honor I am in the process of my second, ninety day confinement in a mental hospital. I have been under psychiatric care for over a decade, almost two decades and if you peruse my official psychiatric file you will see entry after entry about my so called delusions being, 'deeply entrenched' and tons of psychobabble such as 'though the Patient is cheerful and competent and cooperative his prognosis for a cure is slim due to the attractiveness of his delusion.' Those are the opinions of professional Mental Health Experts. You are a Judge. I assume a fine one but you definitely aren't a Shrink of any kind so you should listen to all these expert opinions about me. All this psychiatric psychobabble ought to hint to you my current proclamations of my so called hallucination's involvement are sincere! It is what I truly believe! It is all I remember! I know I'm under oath and could go to jail for contempt or perjury. Believe me crazy or not I do understand that. But I really have no recollection of entering that dwelling myself to rescue my Daughter! To my point of view Uncle Mercury did it and you yourself admit I couldn't have fit through the hole and do not forget it really, really, really was a rescue with plenty of normal People with degrees backing up that fact. That is beyond question! I'm not lying to you, Your Honor. I'm reporting as best my mind can what I remember happened!"

The Judge stared at him.

Trevor reminded her, "The size of the hole!"

She sighed. She glanced up and motioned for the Cops from forensics to approach the bench.

They did. Eli was trying not to smirk! The expression on their faces was a priceless portrayal of sheer confusion and terror!

She leaned down and asked, "So how do YOU think he really got in?"

They shrugged very embarrassed, "We haven't figured that out yet!"

The Judge growled, "You are supposed to be New York's finest CSI team and you can't figure out how this Man broke and entered a very secure dwelling and 'spirited out' his Daughter?"

Claire, Trevor, Eli and their entire cheering section smiled wryly at her use of the term "spirited."

The head of the CSI said, "The Man who owns the house installs security features for a living and he can't figure it out either! The book about home security he wrote was used to make the hole in the window! But that is all we are sure of!"

The Judge scratched the back of her neck and shook her head, "So far its Lunatic 1, the entire CSI department, the field Police, several different Psychiatrists and the Man's own Lawyer 0! Plus a Security Expert who owned the house! If you can't figure out how he did it I'm half tempted to let him go on the basis we haven't even any proof he was ever in the building! Plus we have no confession from him that he was! You found no prints! He can't have gotten through the hole! All the glass was found on the outside! He claims a god did it! We didn't arrest this god so the real perp may not be on trial here! And if we did have this god in custody how could we hold him? He's libel to pull a Hancock and just fly out of the hoosegow!"

Trevor started to laugh. She had Uncle Mercury's potential modus operandipegged alright!

She swung around and glared at him, "Mr. Pierce quit laughing or I'll hold you for contempt!"

Trevor quit laughing faster than Claire had ever seen him do so!

Eli had a harder time of it but he managed to repress his giggles too before the Judge started up on him!

Claire stared at the ceiling demanding the REAL owners of the Universe restore some sanity to their current corner of it! How was it that wherever her Husband went the very laws of reality seemed to shimmer a little bit and get shaky?

Eli breathed a sigh of relief. Trevor was crazy all right but he had a fine understanding of how to win his point however nuts. If only he were normal! He'd have made a fine Lawyer!

The Judge banged her gavel, "Trevor Pierce I find you not guilty of kidnapping due to the life threatening situation your Daughter was in. I do consider that to be a Citizen's arrest. But I do find you guilty of breaking and entering though Heaven help us we can't figure out how you did it! I also see what what they say about you by your own admission is true. You are quite abnormal and need intensive psychiatric care!"

Trevor felt his heart leap into his throat!

"No!" whispered Claire softly

Back at the hospital Delightful who had been watching with her omnipresence started crying

Uncle Mercury had to sit down suddenly.

Eli Stone was already plotting his appeal.

Isaac looked like his heart would break!

Multiple, enormous thunderbolts crackled across the night skies of Thessaly!

In the Valley the Thessalonian Mortals, woken from their sleep, looked out their windows and knowing the gods were really up there on Olympus (though no one ever believed them) guessed correctly they were angry about something!

The Judge continued, "So I order you to continue with your current therapy and psychiatric care for as long as your Therapists and Doctors deem it necessary and for the of crime of breaking and entering I sentence you to the community service of continuing to raise your Daughter!"

The room exploded with joy! In Thessaly the thunder bolts stopped as quickly as they had started and in the moonlight a gentle and badly needed rain started to fall.

There were tears of joy and gratitude in the fallen love god's eyes. "Thank you your Honor! I feel like Admiral Kirk busted back down to Captain and ordered to head the Enterprise!"

Back to the Old Homestead

About an hour later they arrived back at the Mental Hospital.

Grateful to be allowed freedom and freaked out by some of the Patients, Felix hastily made his "escape."

"Adios, Felix!" Delightful waved, a sad look on her Baby face.

Trevor said, "I know what will put serenity back into the goddess of serenity! Delighted darlin' show everyone how well you gobble down the Mom-juice now!"

Trevor snapped his fingers at the ward Nurse like a Wine Connoisseur calling for the Maitre de except he smiled a bit too much.

The Nurse went and fetched him one of his Wife's pumped breast milk bottles.

Eli Stone watched Trevor bottle fed Delightful. As she hungrily sucked on her Mother's pumped milk, Trevor explained things to her about her family who she would soon be meeting due to their planning a visit. "The way to talk to most Animals and Autists and all Primates but Neurotypicals is to politely avert your eyes. Uncle Vulcan finds eye contact threatening. Zeus can't always make sense when he talks but that doesn't mean he won't love you. And he needs your love. He needs all of our love. That goes for the Schizophrenics at Sachs too and our dishwasher at Tres Equis. They can' t always speak and understand words but they are all still completely Human and that goes for both incorporeals and Mortals with the problem. All living beings in the entire Multiverse share the same heart. Captain Kirk is right. Everybody's Human!"

Delightful stopped sucking on her bottle long enough to give her Daddy a solemn look and say, "Yes, Cupid."

Eli Stone smiled and turned to Claire, "So she came out of the womb already talking?"

Claire nodded, "Oh yes! And her hair was already twice as long as she was and was about a quarter of her weight."

Eli smiled, "And she's put back on an ounce just from the few days she was with her Daddy again!"

Trevor nodded, "Yes. I lack the words in any language I know and I know a lot of them, to let you you know how grateful I am! And I'm not the only one! Don't be surprised if it never rains anywhere you want to go on any day you are off for the rest of your life! And I have it on good authority your life is going to be very long and very prosperous, despite that hole in your head!"

Eli smiled, "I would say if I get through a couple of years and good weather on my days off keeps happening I will have to conclude Trevor Pierce really is Cupid!"

Trevor laughed and put is finger to his lips, "Well don't tell my Wife! She won't be able to handle it!"

Eli smiled, "You know Cupid, about two thousand years ago a Galilee Carpenter declared himself Lord of the entire Universe and except for His nasty death that worked out fine for Him. I've been reading mythology. It think it's safe to say no one is going to fight you to be Cupid, so you can have him! So far as I'm concerned you ARE Cupid!"

Cupid gave a wry grin, "I was kind of at the bottom of the pecking order wasn't I? It's ironic. I have more social status as a Mental Patient than I did as a god!"

Ellie nodded, "And that is a good argument for your authenticity. If at some point you decided to go crazy and hypnotized yourself into thinking you were a god, why pick Cupid when you could have had Zeus, Apollo, Thor, Quetzalcoatl, one like that? You kind of made a strange choice."

Cupid shrugged, "You know you are walking a fine line here between suspecting I'm not delusional which is a refreshing change from what I usually get, and just plain out insulting me!" Then he laughed, "Though really the same thought has occurred to me. And if I were going to be someone I am not, why pick a god at all? We are so dysfunctional! Except for Mercury here who is as dumb as toast there isn't a normal one in the lot. So without powers just what is the point? And why have the delusion I had to stay celibate for so long? Why not be Captain Kirk instead? I'm a devout Trekker. I like Captain Kirk! And he gets more Women than I ever did anyway!"

Claire said, "You wanted to punish yourself."

Trevor said, "Oh can it Claire! I'm not that much of a sadist!"

She smiled, "Well not consciously you are but a lot of things go on in folk's subconscious's that would be hard to believe. Eli, Trevor has a whole 'nother Person down there somewhere inside of his mind and since that Person is the original Host he is probably aware of what is going on most of the time. Plus there is Uncle Mercury. Alright. So he's dumb. He is still apparently a completely separate persona from Trevor's Cupid persona and he's running off this carbon based hard drive too." Claire tapped her Husband's skull. "I thought Trevor's Mother was also a persona but apparently she really does call him once in a while and doesn't seem to want to discourage my Husband from thinking he is the original Cupid. It was his childhood nickname. But I don't quite understand why she is so complacent her only Son is delusional and hallucinating. But at least she's real!"

Trevor smiled, "Well I'm functional Claire Bear. Maybe unlike some loved ones I know she has the sense to leave well enough alone! If my original Host showed you might not like him very much. He must not have liked himself very much to turn his body over to me without so much as a peep of protest in 18 years! I really think you ought to leave well enough alone. As Lt. Uhura said "be careful what you wish for, you might get it!

Trevor added, "Maybe my Host just wanted to destroy all desire in himself like skinny, scrawny Buddha." Trevor sighed gazed at the floor and shook his head. "Incidentally Buddha is not a god. We offered him godhood and Christ offered him a nice pad in New Jerusalem but he wouldn't take either offer! He's just a Ghost right now like billions of others. He's still sitting under this Bodhi tree trying to destroy all desire in himself! You would think by now there could hardly be any left! We gods and others in the supernatural realm are discussing and trying to figure out what to do about him. The solar system won't last forever. Eventually our Sun goes nova and this place turns into a literal lake of fire. The only ones who survive are the folks in future-built structures designed to survive supernovas and the coming Big Crunch and the Big Bang again; New Jerusalem also sometimes called John's Cube because of its shape, Olympus, Asgard, The Condor's Den, Nighthawks Diner, Hotel California, The Golden Pyramid, etc. We call those 'keeps.' Eli. We aren't going to mourn too much for most of the poor souls who fail to end up in a keep because they had chance after chance after chance to be helped and turned them down." Trevor looked at his Wife and frowned. "It's exactly like the Shrinks. We have entire mental hospitals and mean streets full of poor lost Souls but many can't trust enough to receive help or they have too much of the wrong kind of pride. So they help the ones who want to be helped while the unwilling ones are ignored or kept heavily sedated. We also tend to concentrate on those who can admit they need help and ask for it. Also, we see the inward mind not all the hullabaloo which may or may not be sincere. That's why there has to be faith. It's not us gods being mean. Its just a necessary part of the healing process for either a Mortal to have to trust us supernatural beings just as a Mental Patient has to trust the People trying to help him or her." Cupid's face softened, "But as for Buddha, he's kind of special. He's an almost made it. If there was no Jewish Carpenter, Buddha would have taken His ecological niche. But he doesn't even want his own salvation! So we gods and the Angels and the Big Guy are stuck between a rock and a hard place. We would like to save him but he's got to want our help! But there he sits, trying to destroy all want! Mortals help us here because Heaven has ran out of ideas!"

Claire grinned ruefully, humoring her divinely crazy Husband. "Sounds to me like Buddha needs a good Therapist like me to go sit under that Bodhi tree with him and gently win his trust and then carefully guide him into better coping skills!"

Cupid smiled lovingly at his disbelieving Wife. "Well Claire Bear I know you don't believe me but you are going to get a chance to do exactly that! You have no comprehension of your Grand Future, due to your disbelief." He grinned. "Are you EVER going to be surprised!

Eli remembered his visions and smiled, "Claire don't be so sure he's crazy here. He may be right!"

Soon after Eli flew back to San Francisco with a big smile on his face most of the way.

He was going to have many interesting things to discuss with is acupuncturist and Spiritual Adviser, Dr. Chen!

Dr. Greeley walked into the B Wing. He smiled at the peaceful sight of the newly reunited family. The only thing that worried him was the Child's clear preference for her Daddy over her Mother. She preferred to be bottle fed her Mother's breast milk by her Daddy than getting it direct from her Mother! But fortunately Claire didn't seem to be resenting that or there could have been future problems in their relationship! But it was just too obvious to Claire the Child was exactly like her Daddy and that was simply that.

Dr. Greeley sat down and waited for the Baby to finish her bottle. She drank it all the way down! He smiled at her, "Good girl! Delightful may I hold you?"

Delightful nodded.

The Psychiatrist picked her up and smiled, "You remind me of my Daughter when she was your age!"

Delightful nodded politely.

"Child now that you are back with your family do you promise to keep eating like I just saw you do?"

Solemnly the green eyed beauty nodded.

Dr. Greeley turned to "Trevor." "Trevor you aren't in ay more legal trouble. And this whole charade of Baker Acting you was just to keep you out of that sort of thing. You are mostly harmless and cooperative. There is nothing we can do for you here that can't be done just as well or better on an Outpatient basis. I see no reason why you have to stay here any more. Your bar needs you! Go back to work you crazy Barkeep!"

Dr Greeley thought Trevor would do his usual Snoopy dancing but he surprised all of them. He didn't waste the time! Instead without a word he grabbed up his cell phone and headed for the door out of the harmless ward! Hector had overheard and as quickly as possible unlocked it and swung it open for him so he barely had to break his stride. As he ran into freedom he called back, "Claire Bear be a dear and collect my stuff and take care of my Kid!"

Everyone including most of the other Patients went over to the window and watched him run across the street, just barely dodging cars and in a great hurry!

Into the bar he went!

Then they went and stared at the lap top which revealed the joyous sight of Patrons welcoming their prodigal Lunatic, Barkeep, Bar Manager and fallen love god back into the Tres Equis 'fold!'"

As Claire watched the lap top she noticed the Barkeep known as Merv bending down and kissing him on the top of his head! Claire stared puzzled. Wheels were turning! She said in a puzzled voice. "That Barkeep looks an awful lot like what Trevor claims Uncle Mercury looks like and what a weird thing to do! Kissing my Husband like Trevor is family!" But then she shook her head, "No. It just can't be. It's just a coincidence or my Husband hired him just because of the resemblance! Yes, that HAS to be it! And probably because Trevor is consciously or unconsciously treating him like family he is starting to act like he really is family! That could be a very good thing because in time a real red-headed, affectionate Giant in Trevor's life could cut way back on the Uncle Mercury sightings!"

Dr. Greeley smiled at Claire's incredible ability to find a logical reason for everything. He said directly to Delightful, "OK Young Lady since you are showing signs or recovery from anorexia I am releasing you too. Claire come to my office and pick up your Daughter and Husband's release papers, and Hector please go pack up Trevor's stuff! I'll drop it by your apartment later Claire. You and your Daughter go try to do some bonding. It shouldn't just be Daddy she's always hankering for!"

Claire nodded, her eyes brimming with tears of joy!'

"Freedom!" Delightful shrieked with Baby-glee! "Freedom Daddy! Freedom Delightful! Freedom Mommy! Felix Felix Felix!"

Claire nodded, "Yes I'll take you to see Felix. I'll take you just as soon as I finish with the paperwork." She turned to Dr Greeley, "Thank you Boss for saving my family!"

Dr Greeley smiled, "You are welcome! And by the way I understand since the Judge convicted your Husband of breaking and entering and court-ordered psychiatric care for it that made his stay here a forensic, psychiatric confinement. So the court system will reimburse us for it. That cuts your bills in half! The Pierce family only owes for Delightful's stay now. So her college fund should still be able to stay in the budget!"

He thought to himself, especially since its going to be quite a while before Delightful is even physically old enough to handle college!

Once the paperwork was done Claire picked up Delightful in her car seat and with a much more caution than her Husband had shown she carefully crossed the street.

Inside the bar it was as if Cinco de Mayo had come in June! There was a conga line going with Felix being pushed by Trevor in his wheel chair at the front end of it and that strange, tall, red haired Bar Keep almost bent in half to reach the shoulders of tiny Jerry their Schizophrenic Dishwasher at the other end.

The only one who did not look too happy was Lita.

Then Trevor took the the mic and started singing. The conga line slowed to a crawl and then broke up. Soon everyone was singing with him. Claire had never figured out how when her Husband started such a song fest everyone in the room would suddenly know all the words and sometimes the steps to dances also!"

Most of the time such songfests were worship services to Cupid. Trevor had delusions of reference about any song with the word, "love" in it. He even cheerfully used the term 'delusions of reference" himself it but claimed Mortals just didn't realize they were playing songs about him! The Hospital staff had discovered soon during his first confinement love songs calmed 'Cupid" down more effectively than even the most potent antipsychotics. Claire had also found her Husband, unlike most Men, was perfectly happy to wait patiently for his Wife to finish her quest for bargains and beauty at shopping malls as long as the Muzak "played songs about him!" He would stand where ever she wanted him to wait however long it took for her to shop, with his eyes closed, a blissful smile on his face.

Abnormal or not Trevor was the easiest Male to manage!

Sometimes she felt like the luckiest Woman in the world!

But this time the the song's keywords seemed to be "home' more than it was "love."

He was singing "I'm going Home by Chris Daughtry.

"I'm staring out into the night
And trying to hide the pain
I'm going to the place where love
and feeling good don't ever cost a thing,
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain!

I'm going home to the place where I belong
where your love has always been enough for me!
I'm running from

you know I think you got me all wrong!
I don't regret this life I chose for me!
But these places and these faces are getting old
So I'm going home!

The miles are getting longer it seems
The closer I get to you... babe!
I've not always been the best man and friend for you
But your love remains true and I don't know why
You always seem to give me another try!
I'm going home
To the place where I belong
Where your love has always been good enough for me!
I'm running from

You know I think you got me all wrong!
I don't regret this life I chose for me!
But these places and these faces are getting old!
Be careful what you wish for
cause you just might get it all!
you just might get it all!

And then some you don't want!
Be careful what you wish for

cause you just might get it all!
You just might get it all!

I'm going home to the place where I belong!
Where your love has always been enough for me!
And I'm running from..

you know I think you got me all wrong!
I don't regret this life I chose for me!

But these places and these faces are getting old
But these places and these faces are getting old
I'm going home!
I'm going home!"

Claire felt a cold chill go up her spine! Was that completely her Husband talking?

Or

Was it possibly at least partially his Host?

Then Trevor started talking and everyone listened attentively as if he had them under some kind of heavy spell. Again Claire felt the ache of what Trevor could have been if only he hadn't needed to escape from reality! In other time lines, possibly, Trevor was a gifted Research Scientist, a Teacher, a brilliant College Professor, an Olympic prize winner in archery or almost any other projectile throwing sport, a talented Musician, a famous Actor or an honest, caring Politician!

Or could he have become something extremely dangerous? Because the potential for that was there also!

Because he could have convinced his Audience of anything! But as usual his considerable and potentially dangerous Hitler-like powers to influence were being used completely harmlessly! Wasted maybe, but at least he was mostly harmless by choice, (much of it subconscious). Could the need to render himself harmless possibly have had something to do with his break from reality?

All he wanted to discuss was his changing concept of home!

Her brilliant but mentally confused Husband said gently to his spell bound audience."When I first arrived in the Mortal Realm, lonely and aching for Olympus and my family and my powers, and physically and emotionally feeling the loss of omnipresence like a missing tooth or a cut off leg complete with phantom pain and omnipresent hallucinations of places and spaces I once could have mentally googled but no longer could, I used to comfort myself with that song. Then as I found Mortals who could love me and fill the empty void in my heart I started self-singing happier songs. But when I was across the street again I found myself singing this again, but to my shock and amazement what I was longing for was not Olympus but here! This bar, my Star Trek club, my Improv group and our apartment!" He nodded at his Wife, "I am sure Dr. Claire McCrae considers that quite a breakthrough!"

Claire nodded and her eyes filled with tears of joy. Her Husband was right! It was!

The End of Part II of this Domestic but Divine Saga.

*The Spanish Delightful said to Felix was, "Felix! I love you! I love you! Read please! Any Winnie the Pooh! Read please! Chapter Three, Don Quixote for Don Quixote knows as my Crazy Father knows and the Crazy Carpenter knows if you can Love powerfully enough to draw others to yourself, if you can dream hard enough and long enough so you never give up, never surrender! Others will cheerfully do the work for you and Divine Madness can be forged with fire, fertile soil and passion into perfect Reality. Read please! Chapter Two, Darwin's Origin of the Species for he knew that the Vine grows and branches and gets pruned and directed, and it grows and branches again and gets pruned and directed again all the way around Time's Circle. And Life is both Vine and Vinedresser for iron sharpens iron and Life sharpens life and Man his own Predator, sharpens Man.

Read please! Chapter 1 Ecclesiastes. Wise King Solomon! He knows as Einstein knows and my Crazy Father knows that Time is a perfect Circle with no beginning and no end. Life rides the Wheel from Single cell to Omega Point back to single cell forever trapped because of Love: Cannot change one living Cell to better or to worse! Or the Future would be different. Then the Past would be different and then again the Future would be different. We would all be gone! Read please! Peter Rabbit. (I like Bunnies). Read please! (So I learn Mortals): Dear Abby. Read please the funnies! I need giggles! Keep hugging me and I don't want to ever eat strained carrots ever, ever EVER again!"

Part III is up. In Cupid: Ascension to Olympus Claire finds to her horror that Trevor has been mailing money "home to his family"and has been doing so for at least two decades! To find out where these hundreds of thousands of dollars have really been going she flies to Greece, climbs Mount Olympus with the help of a mysterious, very tall, red headed stranger who looks disconcertingly like their barkeep, Merv! What will she find waiting for her on the top of that windy, snow-covered, dangerous mountain thousands of miles away from their comfortable apartment in New York City? Goddess-hood, powers and wisdom? A deadly fall to her death? Or incurable madness of her own?