Dear Finnick,

I miss you. I miss you so much. So I thought I'd write this letter.

I know you'll never actually read this or see this or even know that I wrote it, but it still makes me feel better to pretend that - just for a moment - you're reading this. It makes me feel like you're just gone for a while - that you'll be back by next week.

A lot has been happening lately. You should see Altum. I swear he's you back from the dead - he gets more and more similar every day. Despite being a carbon copy of you in looks, he has that same spark that I always loved you for. That thing…I don't know how to describe it. But I know you get it.

He's gotten so big. You'd think that ever since his growth spurt, he'd have stopped eating so much. But I swear he's eaten enough food to feed half of Panem! I didn't know fifteen year olds could eat that much, but he proved me wrong. I love him so much. He's such a blessing after all that's happened.

Everyone is doing well. Katniss and Peeta are expecting their first child - Peeta thinks it'll be a girl, but Katniss insists that she'll have a little boy. Haymitch doesn't care just as long as they never ask him to babysit. They miss you just as much as I do.

Panem is so much better than it was before - you'd be proud. The Districts have all been united together, and the Capitol has been abolished. It's amazing to see the changes in people - they stand up a little taller, smile more often. I guess they're all just comforted by the fact that better days are ahead of us. Plurtach is a fine president.

But that's not really what matters to me. Only you ever really mattered.

I'm just so confused. Everyone around me seems to be getting on with their lives - forgetting the death and the Games and all the pain we've suffered. Everyone's leaving it behind for the future, and I'm the only one left in my sadness.

I need you. And it makes it hurt even more to know you are never going to be there for me again.

I'm in a bad place, and I don't know how to get out. I can feel the depression, but I don't know how to fight it. I need you so badly, or else I'll die.

I try to pretend for Altum and all of our friends and everyone around me, but the falseness just makes it hurt more when I let out my true feelings. I have no one to protect me from myself, and I think that's the scariest thing I've ever experienced - even in the Games and the Rebellion, I wasn't alone. But now I am, and it's horrible because now I see everything for what it really is, and I don't like it at all. I much prefer being mad.

And I know that's where I'm going. The dreams are coming back, and they're worse then ever. I have to muffle my screams so Altum won't here. Every night, I'm either in the Games, surrounded by water and blood; or I'm in the Rebellion, watching my friends die one by one. Watching you die. Sacrificing yourself all for nothing, because all I have now is pain and lonliness!

It's you, isn't it? You're hurting me! You're making me feel this! Why did you leave me? Why did you hurt me? This torture is because of you! I hate you! I HATE EVERYTH-

Please come back to me.

It appears that everyone around me's life is sunny, but all I see ahead of me is black.

Love Always,

Your Annie