AN: This story-ish thing has been written by two people (This Losing and .Will.) who have known each other for a heck of a looooooong time, so ignore the varying sentence structure and other so-called randomness.

Disclaimer: Neither one of us are JKR, and if she was… well I would be holding her hostage till she made more books, then I would pawn them off as my own so I could get my own fricken mansion. We aren't Stephanie Meyer either... although a battle-royal between the two would be awesome. JKR would totally kick some arse! Nor Joss Whedon, or anyone else remotely famous/recognizable.

ON WITH THE STORY!

"Once there was a boy… (dun dun dun…)

He was kind of an idiot, but we'll get to that later.

We start this horribly in-joke story with said boy in the Slytherin common room."

Prologue

Blaise sat in the common room waiting for anyone remotely interesting. It was a slow night, lacking any sense of entertainment. The fire was crackling but that's not very interesting, is it? There were few people in the room, but the ones that were present were squealing like pigs about the new perfect, sparkly, dazzling, alluring (what did he just think alluring??), et cetera et cetera exchange student from Beauxbatons, Edward something-or-other. (This is Stephanie Meyer u can tell by our overuse of big adjectively wordssss). So absolutely nothing was happening, if we haven't sufficiently covered that already. It was just when Blaise was considering turning his wand on himself that Draco Malfoy sauntered through the mysteriously unknown entrance to Slytherin, smirking.

"I am the great Fabio! No mere mortal girl can resist my dashingly good looks!"

Now Blaise was wondering about Draco's sanity. Who the heck was Fabio anyway?

"Umm?" Blaise questioned, no longer suicidal.

"I have conquered the beast! She was hard to break, but I finally got her wrapped around my finger." Blaise rolled his eyes at this statement, muttering something resembling conceited peroxide-head. Right about then he fell into an unfortunate bout of coughing.

"Jealous much?" Draco teased.

"Jealous," Blaise smiled, mulling this over, liking the sound. Draco knew his friend was slow to anger, so when his eyes immediately brightened he took a step back.

"What are you thinking, Zambini?" he asked a little wary.

"So Fabio, no mere mortal can resist you? Would you care to place a bet on that?" Blaise's eyes glinted sending shivers down Draco's normally irresistible spine.

**pause we're making green mustaches now!**

"I say, bring it on Be-otch. Name your terms." This was exactly what Blaise's temporarily insane mind longed to hear.

"Excellent..." Things were definitely looking up for Blaise in the entertainment department.

AN: No, we aren't on crack.... Sugar yes. It is still legal in most states. Peace Out!

Oh... and please review. Criticsm is welcome, but flames will be happily sent back or refunded for chocolate cookies for the good reviewers. Be warned, we know where you type. Haha paranoia paranoia everybodys commin ta get me...

But really, this will have a plot, we just have to give the bunny carrots!

~LBW and This Losing~