I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it. It's a parody, so pretty much every one is ooc, even the ocs.
Also, don't expect a lot of updates. It's not officially completed, but that's only because I might add more if I feel like it or am inspired to.
I don't own Dragonfable. If I did...well, let's not go into the myriad of things I would change.
A Bad Day to be a Villain
"Ya know, Seppy, you should be more careful where you walk." Aslynn taunted before collapsing in a fit of uncontrollable laughter.
Sepulchure was not amused, but he would not allow the small red headed imp the pleasure of seeing him get angry.
When she had calmed down enough to speak again she got up and, chuckling, said, "You alright? Usually you have a really short temper..." Seeing no reaction aside from a disapproving frown she continued, "Ah, well that should hold you for a little while, hopefully. Catch ya later, al-li-gat-or." she sang before running away, leaving an over-powered doom knight stuck in a net hanging from a tree branch.
Ten seconds later, Sepulchure over-powered the experimental contraption.
"Too good for you."
In a secret base at an unknown location...
"Have you gotten everything?" Aslynn asked The Hero.
Marron looked up, annoyed. "Don't copy the author."
"What?" Aslynn asked, confused.
Marron shook her head. "Nothing. Never mind. Everything is here."
"Let me go, peasants!" an angry voice yelled from inside one of the cells.
Aslynn and Marron ignored his ranting as they moved on to the next part of their plan.
"This is the only time I'll ever say this..." Marron said, uncomfortable.
"Yeeesssss." Aslynn prodded with clear excitement.
"...but you can now..." Marron was having trouble saying it.
Aslynn was hopping up and down, grinning widely.
"...push the red button." Marron forced out.
Aslynn gave a loud shout of excitement and ran over to said button, which was on a pedestal.
She smashed it.
Thousands of miles away, over an unknown sea, a giant, flying castle exploded.
"Sepulchure's going to be soo mad." Aslynn laughed hysterically.
Marron sweat-dropped.
"Daddy?" a tiny voice interrupted.
Aslynn stopped laughing. "Hey Gravelyn. Don't you just love explosions?" she said enthusiastically, picking the one year old up and spinning her around slowly before cuddling her.
"Daddy!" Gravelyn shouted excitedly, pointing to something behind Aslynn.
Aslynn spun around to face a very angry doom knight. "Hey Marron." Aslynn said, backing away slowly as if Sepulchure were some wild animal. She looked around frantically to see Marron passed out against a wall.
How did I not notice that?
"Well..." she trailed off, setting Gravelyn on the ground, "see ya later, Grave." she said to the child.
"Aswyn." Gravelyn said, holding her arms out to the girl.
"In our defense, we didn't kidnap her from your castle." Aslynn hastily explained. "Some cult did, and I know that cult. They experiment on children."
"I know. I'll let you off this time, but if either of you tell any one I have a daughter..." Sepulchure warned.
"Heh. Don't worry, neither of us like gossip. Well gossiping. Hearing other people's is good for blackmail." Aslynn rambled.
Gravelyn kept pulling on her pant's leg and didn't seem to be going anywhere, so Aslynn picked her up and tried to pass her to Sepulchure.
"You're coming with me." he said instead of taking the child.
Gravelyn cheered.
"But you said..." Aslynn started to accuse.
"I never said you would get away with trapping me in a net." he reminded her.
"Oh. Where would you take me?" she asked.
Sepulchure said nothing, not wanting to humor a dumb question.
"Because if it's your flying castle..." Aslynn laughed nervously, "there might be a problem."
April Fools
Aslynn was excited - beyond excited, in fact – because it was finally the day she had been looking forward to all year long.
April Fools Day.
She slid down the banister of the staircase joining the second floor hallway to the foyer. The dark colors and creaky floor boards only served to elevate her mood as she skipped into the kitchen.
"Good morning, Oishii." she sang when she saw the blue troll.
"Good morning, Aslynn. You said you wanted me to cook something extra special, so I made this!" Oishii said cheerfully. "Just make sure it doesn't touch the rhapsody pudding. I haven't made these since the first...incident. I hope nothing goes wrong." she worried.
Aslynn grinned widely. "No worries, Oishii. Your food is safe with me."
If anything, that worried the cook more. "This is for a friend, right? Maybe I should go with you."
Aslynn's grin became sheepish. "Well, he isn't exactly a friend, per say."
Oishii looked curious.
"He's more like...someone I really enjoy pranking. He's a villain actually." Aslynn admitted.
"Well..." Oishii said, still unsure.
"It is April Fools Day." Aslynn said.
"I don't want my cooking to hurt any one."
Aslynn laughed. "If only it were that easy, but no, he'll be fine."
Oishii still looked hesitant, so Aslynn leaned in and whispered mischievously, "Do you want to know who it is?"
Oishii nodded and Aslynn told her. Oishii's eyes widened comically and she gasped. Just then Marron came in.
"What's going on here?" she asked, highly suspicious upon seeing Oishii's horrified expression and Aslynn's smirk.
"I was just telling Oishii my plans for today." Aslynn replied, taking advantage of Oishii's petrifying shock to grab the food. "See ya!"
"Oh no you don't!" Marron yelled, rushing toward the teen, but she had already disappeared into the air.
"She was joking, wasn't she?" Oishii asked, hopeful.
Marron turned to her. "What did she say? She asked frantically.
The answer made her want to scream in frustration.
Aslynn reappeared in a certain flying castle and snuck around until she found the throne room. It was empty. Carefully balancing the food, she moved quickly into the space behind the throne and poured the rhapsody pudding into the large pot.
Her ears twitched when she heard footsteps and voices echoing down the hallway. She smirked madly and disappeared into the air again.
Traveling through the air was a very fast, but magically exhausting way to travel. At her magic level, Aslynn could only manage it two times a day, at the most. As soon as she reappeared in her room she collapsed on her bed and fell asleep.
It wasn't until evening that she woke up. Her eyes glinted in the fading light coming through her window when she noticed a left over land mine on one of her desks. It brought to mind a bandit named Drakath. She smirked.
April Fools Days wasn't over yet.
Reviews are appreciated, so if you feel like doing so, please do! I'm good with constructive criticism - I'm here to improve after all. Just don't flame. I can only burn so many mouse...err, marshmallows. (Viva Pinata reference. Those poor pinatas.)