I had a hard time deciding on the ship that I wanted to write this song for, but I finally found the one that this song describes perfectly. The song I used is Talking To My Angel, by Montgomery Gentry, and it's a really good song. So enjoy, and please remember to review, my ducklings!
Disclaimer: They're not mine. I'm getting a third opinion...
This songfic is dedicated to all you fans out there of my songfics. Ya'll definitely keep me going!
Greg House stumbled into his dark apartment, whiskey on his breath and his hands shaking. But for some reason, he wasn't drunk, and he crept stealthily down the hall and into the second door on the right.
Moon beams fell onto the floor through the curtains, and House wiped at his bleary eyes, sighing quietly at the three day old stubble that covered his cheeks.
The sound of regular, soft breaths distracted him from his self loathing, and he took uncertain steps across the soft carpet on the floor.
His eyes finally fell on the sleeping form, and he blinked back tears as he laid the palm of his hand on her back gently. Her back rose and fell with ease, bringing a strange kind of peace over him, as she always did.
His head was pounding, but he ignored the pain and continued to watch the sleeping form.
"It's me again," he murmured quietly, stroking her soft hair. "I've been drinking again, and I feel so stupid. But I never feel stupid." He sighed and ran his hand through his oily hair.
A single tear slid down his bristled cheek, and he swiped at it angrily. Only she could reduce him to this. But it wasn't her fault that she drank. Far from it. It was because of her that he was trying to quit.
It's me again, with this whiskey
On my breath again
And I'm ashamed about the shape I'm in
And how bad I feel
Damn these tears, damn this habit
That I've had for years
I'm trying hard to make it disappear
I swear I will
Suddenly she let out a small cry, and he immediately reached down into the crib and lifted her into his arms, cradling her awkwardly against his chest. She cried out again, and he began bouncing her gently as he limped around the nursery.
He started humming softly, and after a few minutes, her cries stopped. He smiled when her large blue-green eyes opened and focused on him.
When he had first found out he was going to be a father, he had done the only thing he knew to do. He ran. He had gotten on his motorcycle and rode until he could go no more. Then he went even further, as if he drove far enough, he could escape the weight that had been placed on his shoulders.
He wasn't ready to be a father. Hell, he could barely take care of himself. How could he be trusted with a completely helpless, innocent, and dependant baby?
Some two days later, he had used his key to get into her apartment, knowing that she would be sleeping. He crept through the living room and into the bedroom, stopping to slip out of his shoes, pants and shirt. Once they were gone, he turned his head and stared at her sleeping form for several minutes.
Then he crawled into the bed beside her, freezing when she turned in her sleep and curled into his side. Her deep rooted trust in him amazed House, and he allowed his hand to travel downward and slip under her tank top. It came to a stop over her abdomen, and he couldn't believe that a child, his child, was in there.
He held his hand over her stomach for a few more seconds, then pulled her against his chest. She sighed softly and snuggled into his chest, and he closed his eyes and stroked her hair softly.
He opened his eyes and looked down at his daughter, who was yawning and blinking her eyes slowly. He freed one hand and pressed one long finger against her fist, smiling when her small hand closed around his entire finger.
But don't lose faith in me
I know I can win this battle, wait and see
Thanks to you, I've got a reason to believe
That I can be a stronger man
I know you need me to be a better dad
Baby, I need you to help me make it through
So I'm here talking to you
My angel
A few minutes later, she was sleeping soundly in his arms, cradled carefully against his broad chest. Her fist was still wrapped around his finger, so he gently moved her to the crook of his arm.
As he looked at his daughter's sweet face, he still couldn't believe that he had helped bring something so beautiful and so precious into this world. He had never thought that he would ever father a child, but then she had come along, changing everything he had ever thought and believed in.
He had never seen himself as the conventional type, the kind of man to have a wife, a couple of kids, and a house. But from the moment Cuddy had laid his newborn daughter in his arms, he could actually see himself marrying the mother of his little daughter.
She looked so much like her mother. She had her mother's dark curly hair, her pouty little mouth, and her quiet disposition. But she had his nose and his chin, and her eye color had been from both of them.
Holding her, he let out a soft sigh and rose to his feet, walking over to the window. Moonlight was pouring through the window, and he could see stars twinkling brightly at them. She stirred a little in his arms, and he sat down in the rocking chair beside the window, slowly moving back and forth.
Ever since he could see the small bump that she created in her mother's belly, he had questioned his abilities as a father. His own father had never shown interest in him as a child, until he started using him as a punching bag. Then as soon as he was old enough, he had moved out and never spoken to his father again, until a few years ago, when his father had called requesting to start a relationship with him.
It wasn't until he had fallen for Allison Cameron, then the first time he had laid eyes on his daughter that he finally realized that he could love and be loved unconditionally, and that he could choose not to be like his father.
He shifted her again carefully so that her tiny head rested in the crook of his neck and shoulder, and he rested one large hand on her back.
I watch you sleep, my life changes
With every breath you breath
And I want you to think the world of me
I wanna make you proud
No, it's not too late to make a man
Out of this mess I've made
To put that bottle down and walk away
I will somehow
A while later, House finally rose to his feet and walked back over to her crib, laying her carefully on her stomach. She stretched, then settled back down, and he rested his large hand on her tiny head.
"I love you, Ally cat," he whispered, stroking her soft curls with his calloused thumb. "I know... I know that I'll never be the perfect father. But now that you're here, I know I've got to change my stupid ways. And I will somehow. I just... I just need a little help."
He took a deep breath.
"You certainly deserve a perfect dad, but I'm afraid all I know how to be is me. But you need a much better dad, and I swear to you, Ally, I'll try. I'll try for you."
He watched her as she slept sweetly, her dreams untainted by the horrors and demons that he himself knew so well. Here she was, only a few weeks old, and she already had him wrapped around her little finger, just like her mother.
Finally he leaned down and kissed her soft head, then limped to the door of the nursery. At the door, he turned around, pausing before he said, "Good night, my angel. I love you."
Then he limped out of the nursery and back into his bedroom, knowing that the next day, he would be a better man than the day before. Not for him, but for his angel.
So don't lose faith in me
I know I can win this battle, wait and see
Thanks to you, I've got a reason to believe
That I can be a stronger man
I know you need me to be a better dad
Baby, I need you to help me make it through
So I'm here talking to you
My angel
Yeah, I love you
My angel
The End
A/N: Yes, if ya'll haven't figured it out by now, I'm a die-hard HouseCam shipper. And I honestly think that he would feel this way if he ever became a parent. Thanks for reading, and please remember to review!