Letter home

‚Okay.' He folded the piece of paper and put it in his breast pocket, where it wouldn't get lost, his probably last testament to the world.

'Is it a letter to Angela?' Brennan asked, while she carefully tied the string around his leg.

'No, for Zack.' He admitted: 'In case I'll go into shock after you've done what you'll do. I wanted to tell him something for a long time but I always told myself that tomorrow is another day.' He made a short pause. Tears of fear and pain dwelled up in his eyes.

'But the good thing is, if I don't make it you'll have the double amount of oxygen.'

'I'm not interested I surviving that way.' She gave him a half smile and switched the flashlight on.

'I'm going to make a long cut in the faszien to let out the inner pressure.'

'And how long is a long cut? You know what, don't tell me.'

'It's best if I do it fast and pitiless. Here.' She gave him a cloth to bite down on for the pain: 'Grip something an don't fight the unconsciousness.'

He put the cloth between his teeth and gripped the handles on each side of the car. She looked at him caringly and asked:

'Ready?'

He nodded and she bent down to make the cut, but then she hesitated.

'Wait a moment.' She picked something small and bright from the wrinkles of his jeans.

'What's that?'

'I know what happened with you but we'll deal with that later.'

'Okay. Here, put it between the pages. I'll look at it later.'

He was about to put the cloth in his mouth once more, but he had to tell it someone. He just had to.

'Fucking shit.'

'It's better if you don't talk anymore.'

'I'm crazy about Zack. Absolutely smitten. I stay longer in the lab when he still works. I invite him over to the house whenever I can. But I don't want to screw up what we have so I never asked him out, never really tried anything, because I don't know whether he's interested in me that way at all. I love him, there I said it loud.' He put the cloth between his teeth and gripped the handles. He gave Brennan a nod

and screamed.

'Ready?' She looked at him the wires in her hand.

'Yes.'

'Dr. Brennan, it was an honour.' Instead of saying something she took his arm and hugged him. They would most likely die but he was glad that he wasn't alone. He thought about the letter in his breast pocket and found it reassuring that no matter whether he died or not, Zack would know.

They looked at each other for a last time – the last time a voice in his mind whispered – and connected the wires.

The sound hit him first: a loud, deep, painful noise like the death cry of a dying whale.

The second thing was the pressure. It knocked the air out of him, the precious rest of oxygen that he had left in his lungs. It pressed him into the upholstery of the seat and sent a short, bright – hot pain wave through his leg.

The worst thing was the earth. It was everywhere and bit into his clothes, his hair and skin. It surrounded him completely. It felt like he was eaten and swallowed alive by earth.

He desperately moved his arms as if he was swimming. He couldn't see, he couldn't breathe, he couldn't feel anything beside the thousands tiny and hungry mouths of earth.

Something moved. He couldn't say whether it was above him or next to him because there were no directions underground.

He wanted to scream. I'm here! I'm here! But he couldn't. The earth didn't allow it, but something – hands – hands pulled at him, pulled him up.

To break through the surface of earth was better than to break through the surface of water because he had never been afraid to die in water. The sun shone and the air was stirred by a small wind. He couldn't be more in love with the sun, live, air and Zack as he was in this moment.

Zack's face was above him and he could hear Angela and felt her arms strong and warm and alive around his body.

Zack looked as if he was about to cry. Jack reached out to touch his face. Zack's hand gripped his, tightly and Jack used his other hand to pull Zack down in a sloppy, awkward – angled kiss.

He let go too soon, but he was too tired, too exhausted and his leg hurt too much.

He breathed deeply in and out. Life was wonderful.

The euphoria of the rescue didn't last very long. Once it wore off together with the adrenaline, he felt his leg even more and of course all the bruises and cuts that his brain had chosen to ignore while he was buried alive.

Endless hours of examinations, talking to doctors and nurses, treatments and when he was finally discharged he knew he couldn't go home and go to bed. Sleep was one of the last things he wanted to do right now. No, he would go back to lab and help to catch that bastard.

The paper in his breast pocket rustled. He wondered if Zack was still at the lab or if someone had driven him home.

He rubbed his thumb over his lips. He had kissed Zack and he had no idea how Zack had taken the kiss or anyone else. He hadn't come to the hospital and neither Angela nor Booth had said anything, but he was sure that they had seen it.

When he entered the lab, Angela stood there, her arms crossed over her chest.

'You should be home and sleeping.'

'I'm not tired.' He answered: 'Is Zack here?'

Her face lost some of its seriousness and she smiled:

'He is.'

'Thanks.' Her expression sad so much more than words ever could and he was glad like never before that she was his friend.

'You should go home. I can take a cab.' Zack said as soon as he came through the door. He opened his mouth to say something but Zack didn't let him:

'You're hurt and you need time to heal. If you're not healed you can't work properly and that would be a loss for the lab.

'Zack, come on man. Look at me.'

Zack turned unwillingly away from his workplace to face Jack. His dark eyes were clouded with emotions and he looked like he was on the verge of crying.

'The kiss.' Jack began but Zack interrupted him again:

'A natural reaction to an overflow of serotonin and endorphin and I was the person nearest to you.' Zack explained in a cheap fake of his usual scientific calm. Jack shook his head.

'No.' He stepped nearer: 'I wouldn't have kissed Angela, or Booth or anyone else. I wrote you this while I was buried, in case I wouldn't make it out alive. I wanted to tell you for a while but I always said tomorrow is another day. I don't want to wait anymore.' He fumbled the letter out of his breast pocket and gave it Zack. He watched silently while Zack read the letter. His face gave nothing away as he read the words Jack wrote. When he finally looked up, he looked torn.

'Hodgins, I…'

This time it was Jack who stopped him talking.

'Shh.' He crossed the left distance between them, so that merely an inch separated them.

'All I want is a chance, okay? One chance.' He cupped Zack's face with his hands and when Zack didn't move, didn't say anything; he leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss to Zack's lips. He felt him tense, then relax and then there was Zack's hand lightly on his arm before Jack pulled away.

He looked hopefully at Zack, who remained still, an unreadable expression on his face, but his hand was still on Jack's arm. Then he did something Jack had never expected: he pulled Jack against him, pressed his lips to his and pushed his tongue through the barrier of Jack's lips. Jack's brain needed a second to understand what was happening but then he wrapped his arms around Zack and deepened the kiss; yet let Zack have the control over it.

When they parted, they didn't let go, merely leaned their foreheads against each other.

'I'll take that as a yes.' Jack panted and grinned happily.