Dear Angel Prologue Skitty

Disclaimer: These character's aren't mine... wish they were though!!! Don't sue me, I'll try not to ruin them!

Distribution: Take it! Just e-mail me!

Rating: PG, I think

Author's Note / Spoilers: None really, just after the sixth and third seasons.

Summary: Buffy writes Angel a letter.

Dear Angel,

It's been so long. I haven't seen you in two years. I can't stand how far apart we've grown, how much I still care for you, still love you, despite that. So I figured it was time for me to swallow my foolish Slayer pride, and fill you in.

I'm 23. I feel so old, and most strangers would think my life's just beginning. But I know, it's the beginning of the end. Two years. Two years left. My friends still act like we've got forever left. You and I know that I only have the blink of an eye in reality.

I've been fighting the forces of evil for nine years. I'm tired. I've killed demons who've killed every Slayer they passed. Except me. Seems like I deserve a night off, doesn't it? Can you imagine it? I wouldn't know what to do! Let me rephrase that: what to do that I can do, that wouldn't unleash evilness all over California. What was I saying? Oh, right. A Slayer can only do so much for so long. Everyone says I'm so productive, have I even made a dent in the demon popularity? Really?

Spike said at some point, every slayer wants out. And I guess I believe it. I didn't at first. But lately, I just don't want to fight anymore. Don't worry, I'm not gonna bare my neck to the next vampire I see. But maybe... maybe the next big battle will be my last. Maybe some of my Council renowned "spunk" (loosely translated into: that annoying quality that makes all the Watcher's go koo koo and run away, all except Giles) is fading. Someone should probably start working on getting Faith out, seeing as she's the only hope after I die, at least until she dies.

Okay, enough depressing you, on to the Scooby Gang: Xander and Anya never did get married, but they've dealt with the past enough to be sort of friends. Willow has been non-magic for a year and a half now, since awhile after I came back. She was getting out of control, and she quit for the first time. But then her girlfriend, Tara, did you ever meet Tara?, died. And you especially know how people do the wacky for love...

Anyway, she's somewhat back to Willow mode. There's guilt, a lot of guilt, trying to end the world will do that to a girl, or a guy, or a vampire, or anyone. Tara will always be a part of her, but she's moving on. Even goes on a date every once in awhile.

Spike got his soul back, supposedly to "give me what I deserve." Ironically, ever since he hasn't wanted anything more than friendship from me. A friendship I'm willing to give. Dawn also seems to have gotten over him, thank God. No matter what changes occured, Spike is NOT someone I want my baby sister crushing on..

Although she's not exactly a baby anymore. Even I have to admit that. She'll graduated from high-school in a few years, with no incidents of burning down or blowing up on or off record as of yet. So far she plans to go to UC Sunnydale, at least for the first few years. She says that she doesn't know what she wants to do, and she wants to be near home while she figures it out. But I can tell she knows as well as I do that my end is near.

Riley came back to Sunnydale, tracking a demon, though I forget which one now, and I met his wife. Since then I've gotten a few letters every once in awhile from both of them. They have a daughter Lindsey, and 2 dogs, one freakily named after me.

Giles is really important in the Council these days. He only comes back to the States when we're all gonna die, and for holidays. I miss him a lot, but I do get to see him fairly often, compared to certain vampires who shall remain nameless *AHEM - YOU - AHEM* and I've actually gotten okay at the research, so it all works out.

How's L.A.? How's everyone? How are you? Seeing anyone? No, wait, I don't want to know. It feels so strange. I remember everything about you. Even what I'm not supposed to... I've remembered since I died, the second time (obviously, it hadn't happened the first time around). God! I hate this! I've given up all hope for us, I did almost before we went our separate ways last time. But you're still the only person I'll ever love. You're my soul mate. I want to see you, but if I do I'd never be able to hold it in. So I guess I just have to accept that I'll never see you physically again. And it hurts so much.

I'd better go. But Angel, I love you. Only you. Always you. I wouldn't take back a second with you. In a weird way, we've been lucky. We found each other. We had almost 24 hours of happiness. It wasn't enough, but it was something. We got a start. Some people, never do.

I thought that we had closure, a long time ago, for 5 seconds. But then you were gone, and Riley was there, and poof, closure gone. You don't ever get closure from true love. Without any say in the matter I'm

Always your girl,

Buffy

P.S. You should call or something. It'd be great to hear your voice sometime.