Confessions
Songs in this story: "I'll Stand by You" (I prefer the Carrie Underwood version, but either works.) "Arms" by Christina Perri and a reference to "It must have been love" (featured in Pretty Woman) by Roxette
Penelope tells Derek how she feels at Karaoke Night.
Penelope knew better than to make a bet with Reid, especially when it was not about technology or pop culture (unless it was Star Trek…he was slightly ahead with his memory….and engineering PH.D). She had gone against her better judgment and bet him that Nurse Ogawa was finally called by her first name in "Identity Crisis". But that was when she got her last name. Her first name was actually revealed in "Clues", and Penelope felt doubly stupid as "Clues" was one of her favorite episodes. She knew that Reid would give her a dare that she would be totally against, she just didn't realize how very much she was against it. They had stopped betting money, when Hotch caught them betting about a case and firmly told them to cease and desist. Now they would bet on random life things and make the loser do a dare. The dares usually made one uncomfortable, and the other almost giddy. Penelope had made Reid go on a date with another technical analyst, one that she knew he was completely incompatible with, when he lost a bet about Hotch dating again. Which Boss Man would probably not be too happy to find out they were betting about his personal life. She was prepared to step outside the box, but what Reid had planned for her was way beyond what she was willing to do.
"You want me to WHAT?" Penelope tried to keep her voice down, the door to her office was shut but voices carry.
"Confess your feelings to Morgan….at Karaoke night." Reid calmly repeated.
"You want me to get up on stage, reveal not only that I sing…why can I not keep a secret in this place….but I have to put myself out there, like that, in front of everyone? How can I trust what he said? He would say yes, to a relationship, and that he's in love with me, even if he isn't, just to save me from embarrassment. I don't think I could handle it if I got my hopes up, and they later came crashing down. I don't want to be Roxette singing about lost love. I don't think I could look at him after seeing his face, telling me he didn't really love me like that. Reid, this is too much, please don't ask this of me." Penelope got more frantic as she rambled on.
"Garcia, calm down…It won't be bad. Trust me, this is what I do. Morgan is just as much in love with you as you are with him." Reid put his hands on Garcia's shoulders and told her to breathe because she was scarily close to a panic attack.
"You are a great singer. That was the best part of that horrible date you punished me with, going to that bar and hearing you sing Karaoke.Think of this as cosmic payback for that date, at least you will have better results. I also think that it would be good for all of us to go out again, it's been a while. What a great surprise for the team, I'm sure it would make them very happy, might even get a smile out of Hotch." Reid knew he had her now; she was always a sucker for putting a smile on everyone's face.
Garcia sighed, she hoped he was right, but dreaded that he had mistakenly seen Derek's affection as truly being in love with her. At least this way she would know, move on if she had too. There could/would be other Kevin's…an occasional bed warmer that keeps the loneliness at bay. She knew that she would never marry, or want to have children with any man that wasn't Derek. She told Reid to help her get the team to the bar tonight and exiled Reid from her office, she had to plan.
She grabbed the phone and called J.J.
"Hey, Garci, Got any good gossip? These files are seriously bringing me down." J.J's heart was heavy and Penelope could hear it in her voice.
"Sweet Pea, I have the ultimate gossip for you, but it's more of a show than a tell kind of thing" Penelope realized she could not have planned this better if she had tried. "I think we need to get the team out for drinks tonight. We are all dragging and we need a night away, a night of drunken, sweaty fun. And Reid found this great new place that we HAVE to go to. "
J.J. certainly agreed with her on the night out, but told Pen that she would have to convince Hotch, he was always the hardest to get to let loose.
"Don't worry about Hotch, I know exactly what I'm gonna do about Mr. Fussy Pants, leave him to me."
"As long as you don't call him that to his face, you are probably the only one that COULD get him to say yes….he doesn't like making you unhappy." J.J. knew that everyone on the team felt the same way. Making Garcia unhappy was like kicking a puppy.
Garcia told J.J. to talk to Emily, Reid and Derek and get them on board (which she knew wouldn't be too difficult) and decided to take on Rossi and Hotch together. J.J. hung up, totally forgetting that she didn't get any more out of Pen on her "show, not tell, gossip". She hurried out of her office to grab the others and plan their night out.
Garcia knocked on Hotch's door, and when he called out for her to come in, she was pleased to see Rossi already in his office.
"Garcia, what can I do for you?" He already knew she wanted something, he could tell by the extremely innocent look on her face. She only had that look when she had done something or when she wanted something. Since the team had not recently acquired any high-dollar equipment, he decided it was the latter.
"Boss man, we need a night out…plus you are going to want to see the reason for my next request. I need you and Rossi to help me out with The Ice Queen if my night goes like a fairy tale."Garcia bit her lip and waited for the questions to begin.
"Ah, Kitten, are you finally going to tell your Adonis how you are madly in love with him?"Rossi smiled at her with a confidence that set her teeth on edge.
"I will say this again….sometimes I really hate profilers. Am I that obvious? And if I am that obvious, why has Derek never seen it, or commented if he had? He wouldn't have ignored my feelings and continued to flirt shamelessly with me if he didn't feel the same." Penelope was once again uncertain of whether to proceed or run and hide under her covers until tomorrow…and deal with Reid then.
Hotch saw the anxiety on Penelope's face and jumped to eradicate it. "Derek hasn't seen it for the same reason that you never realized that he loves you just as much. Neither of you think that you deserve the other. You think you are not in his league, that he could only love a certain type of woman. Derek thinks that you need someone that is more whole, not damaged goods. He wants you to be with someone that is safe and will keep you safe. You stay in your easy, but complicated, little friend zone because you are both too scared to lose something so great."
Rossi jumped in and added, "You have nothing to be scared of Bella…tell him how you feel. I bet you anything that you will get your fairy tale ending."
"Humph, no more betting for me, that's what got me into this mess." Penelope quickly clapped her hand over her mouth, she mentally kicked herself and prepared to be chewed out.
Hotch and Rossi exchanged a look that Pen couldn't decipher and Hotch said, "Well, I'm guessing that you learned a lesson, and I should have no worries about hearing that you and Reid are betting on things in the future, right?"
Pen knew she was getting off lightly, with Hotch anyway, and quickly agreed. Hotch and Rossi confirmed that they would go wherever she asked them; no way would they miss this because it would be a memory to tell the kids. She gave them the address of the bar and told them to be there no later than 7:30.
Pen left Hotch's office and passed through the bullpen, getting a thumbs-up from the other team members and giving them one in return. She hurried to her office to shut down her babies for the night. She needed to go home and decide what to wear, how to do her hair, and oh crap, what song should she sing to confess her love to Derek?
Banana Joe's Bar
"A karaoke bar? Really?" Derek said, surprised and intrigued.
"What's wrong Morgan, afraid to hear drunk people sing horribly? Or are you just scared that after a couple of beers that you will get up there and embarrass yourself?" Prentiss teased Derek, earning a withering look and a quick reply.
"I have no problem with people letting loose and singing, even if they are terrible. If they are really drunk it just becomes funny. And for the record, if I was to get up and sing…all the females would swoon at my feet."
Garcia, Prentiss and J.J all rolled their eyes and Rossi snickered at his ego.
"I just cannot picture Reid coming here, for any reason. Why were you here Pretty Boy?" All eyes turned to Reid curious to hear how he stumbled upon this place.
"I, uh, was on a date and she brought me here. The date was horrible, but I enjoyed some of the singers I heard" Reid, very carefully, kept his eyes focused on Morgan as he answered. He knew that if he glanced over at Garcia, the table of profilers would jump on it like sharks smelling blood.
"Well, I for one couldn't care less were we went tonight, as long as there are cold drinks, pretty ladies and music to dance for." Morgan turned the topic back around because he knew Reid got nervous when talking about his personal life. He wanted this to be a carefree night with everyone happy.
"I used to sing…back in college. I might surprise you all and sing something myself." 6 pairs of eyes all turned to Hotch with his startling revelation.
They were stopped from bombarding him with questions when the DJ called for Penelope. She gave the table a quick wink and sashayed up to the stage, knowing that Derek was still watching her with his mouth hanging open.
Penelope took the microphone from Sam, the DJ, and turned to face the audience.
"My first song tonight is dedicated to my superheroes…all of them."
Oh why you look so sad
The tears are in your eyes
Come on and come to me now
Don't be ashamed to cry
Let me see you through
Cause I've seen the dark side too
When the night falls on you
You don't know what to do
Nothing you confess
Could make me love you less
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
So if you're mad get mad
Don't hold it all inside
Come on and talk to me now
Hey, what you got to hide
I get angry too
Well I'm a lot like you
When you're standing at the crossroads
And don't know which path to choose
Let me come along
Cause even if you're wrong
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you
And when, when the night falls on you, baby
You don't know what to do
You're feeling all alone
You won't be on your own
I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Won't let nobody hurt you
I'll stand by you
Take me in into you darkest hour
And I'll never desert you
I'll stand by you
Oh I'll stand by you
I'll stand by you
Penelope finished the song, gave the mic back to Sam, and headed back to her seat. J.J. and Emily both had tears in their eyes and the guys all looked touched.
"Wow, Garcia, I did NOT know you could sing like that" Prentiss exclaimed
"How have I never heard my Baby Girl's beautiful voice like that before?" Derek asked, moved by the words in her song and amazed at how stunning she sounded and looked singing.
"Kitten that was amazing…both the song choice and the delivery of it. You know that the same goes from us to you as well, right? Rossi wanted to make sure that she knew that she meant as much to them as she just proved they meant to her.
Hotch simply said, "That was wonderful Penelope. Will we get to hear more tonight?" He had figured out the parameters of the bet at this point and was anxious to see Derek's reaction when she poured her heart out in song.
"I am a woman of many hidden talents Em. Derek, you've just never been at the right place at the right time before and my Italian Stallion, of course I know, you guys couldn't function without me. And yes, Hotch, I will be singing one more tonight." Pen was ecstatic that they had liked it, and the way Derek was looking at her made her think that maybe things would turn out the way she wanted.
The team passed the next hour in good spirits. They never left their cups empty for long, danced often and let the stress of the past couple of weeks melt away in their camaraderie. Penelope knew it would be her turn again soon and began to get a little nervous. Reid made his way to her ear furthest from Derek.
"Stop worrying." Reid whispered in her ear. "It will be fine. Just get up there, lay it out and blow his mind away with your song."
There wasn't any more time for nerves as Sam called her name to sing again. She whispered a quick thanks to Reid and headed back to the stage. The butterflies in her tummy were dancing in overdrive and she sent up a quick prayer, asking for the best.
"This is specifically for Derek Morgan. You are my everything and I want you to know that I love you…that I'm totally, head over heels, hopelessly in love with you."
She didn't have the courage to look over at him so she closed her eyes and started singing.
I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart
But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start
You put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
You put your arms around me and I'm home
Pen opened her eyes to see Derek getting up from the table and walking towards the stage.
How many times will you let me change my mind and turn around
I can't decide if I'll let you save my life or if I'll drown
I hope that you see right through my walls
I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling
I'll never let a love get so close
You put your arms around me and I'm home
The world is coming down on me and I can't find a reason to be loved
I never wanna leave you but I can't make you bleed if I'm alone
Derek looked at her with such longing; she knew what his response was. Her confidence soared and she poured it into her singing. She couldn't tear her eyes away from his for the rest of the song.
You put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
I hope that you see right through my walls
I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling
I'll never let a love get so close
You put your arms around me and I'm home
I tried my best to never let you in to see the truth
And I've never opened up
I've never truly loved 'Till you put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
I hope that you see right through my walls
I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling
I'll never let a love get so close
You put your arms around me and I'm home
You put your arms around me and I'm home
Penelope finished the song and walked off the stage…directly into Derek's arms. As his lips met hers in a tender but passionate kiss she heard their friends cheering off in the distance.
Derek pulled back from her and gazed into her eyes.
"This has been a night of wonderful discoveries. Penelope Garcia, I love you too. In a totally head-over-heels kinda way too. Let's say our goodbyes and go home where we can 'discuss' this further."
He wiggled his eyebrows at her when he said discuss and it made her giggle and blush. He wrapped his arm around her waist and guided her back to the table.
There was a wide grin on everyone's face, but none bigger than the one on Reid's. He mouthed "I told you so" at Penelope and then turned to the rest of the table.
"That'll be 250 dollars that I will spend very well."
"Wait, what? You bet on us?" Derek asked, astonished.
"Technically, no we didn't bet on you. We bet between the five of us at who was going to be the one to get you to realize how you felt about each other. " Rossi explained with the decency to at least look chagrined.
Penelope replied,
"That's why I didn't get in trouble earlier when I let it slip about betting with Reid. You couldn't say anything without being hypocritical. Boss man, you better be glad I have a soft spot for your son."
"What bet with Reid?"Derek was still confused as to what was going on.
"Come on, my sculpted God of Chocolate Thunder. I will explain on the way home." Penelope grabbed his hand, bid goodbye to their family and drug Derek out of the bar before anyone could say anything that might ruin their moment.
The rest of the team watched them leave and turned back to each other, smiling. Hotch looked at Reid and asked him,
"Reid, did Penelope sing on the night your date brought you here?"
"Yes she did"
"What did she sing?"
"That is definitely a story for another night."