Disclaimer: I didn't write 'Twilight', which ends with 'Breaking Dawn'. If Mrs Meyer had continued the story it would NOT have gone like this.

Author's Note: This story is a spank-fic. It contains domestic discipline. If you would rather not read such depraved nonsense, please look away now.

Alice and I were at shopping together, when I first realised that something was wrong. One moment, we were going through a rack of children's clothes, arguing about whether yellow would look good against Renesmee's hair, then the next moment Alice had a vision.

"You're not going to like this at all," she told me, "our husbands are about to get themselves into trouble."

"What kind of trouble?" Alice didn't look worried, and she would certainly be worried if anything bad was about to happen to Jasper, or to Edward for that matter.

"Either dragged out of the hospital by Carlisle, or moving out of state, trouble," she said, "our problem is that, either way, we're talking about scolding-from-your-wife-trouble. I don't much like doing it; but it's your first time, so you're not going to like it at all."

While Alice was talking, I had quickly slipped the yellow dress to the back of the rack. "Has it happened yet?" I asked, turning back towards her.

Alice rolled her eyes and found the dress again, "not yet. But, there's no point trying to stop them. I thought about it this morning, when they first started planning, and it would only have encouraged them to go further."

"Oh." I wondered if it was worth debating that issue with Alice. Surely it was worth at least trying to warn the boys. Still, if that debate was anything like our little tussle over the yellow dress, I may as well save my breath. She was already halfway to the till.

"So, what are they doing, or about to do?"

Alice grinned at me, pleased that I'd given up on trying to resist the dress. I could always encourage Renesmee to paint whilst wearing it. She handed over her card.

She replied in a low tone, too quiet for us to be overheard. That wasn't a good sign. That must mean that our husbands hadn't gotten themselves into normal, human-style trouble. They'd pulled a full-on vampire stunt. "It's best if you let Edward confess. He deserves the chance to earn a few mitigating brownie points by coming clean. I'll let you know if he leaves anything out!"

"I can give him brownie points for honesty whether I already know what he was up to or not."

Alice nodded, "but, if you know in advance, he won't get the full-on Bella fury, and he definitely deserves it. I don't want you to have any time to get used to it before you see him."

I laughed, "Alice, are you trying to get Edward into more or less trouble?"

She tapped the card machine and watched as her payment was processed. "I want him to see how shocked you are. Then I want him to impress you by being completely honest. It's the best thing for your long-term relationship. You should know by now, Bella, I like to plan long-term."

As we walked out of the shop, I turned to face her, "I guess we'd better head back, then. No more shopping for us."

"Not so," Alice winked, "they've got to misbehave, get caught and get dragged home by their ears. It'll take them between forty and sixty minutes. We can do one more shop, and still arrive home just behind them."

I sighed, one more shop, it was.

We didn't spend too long in there, not by Alice's standards. Soon enough we were driving home, with three bags of clothes for Renesmee and a little something for each of us.

"Do you want help with Edward?" Alice asked me casually.

"What do you mean?"

She frowned, "we did discuss this once before the change, do you remember? Because we can't reveal our nature to humans, we tend to try and provide our own private policing. That means that when someone crosses the line, the family step in and provide a consequence. All the couples tend to deal with these things privately. So you have every right to punish Edward yourself. But, since you've never done it before and might not know what you need to do to make an impression on him. I was wondering if you would like some help."

I wasn't sure how much of this I remembered at all. But, I probably would have tried to block it from my mind!

"Do I have to punish him?"

Alice shrugged.

"What happened before I was changed? You know, if Edward 'crossed the line'?"

"Ah," she pulled a face, "last time Edward really needed disciplining, Jasper did it. That wouldn't really be suitable today."

"But, Carlisle . . ." Alice cut me off before I could remind her that Carlisle was Edward's father.

"Will offer. But, Edward would far rather it was you."

I found that hard to believe.

Alice swung the car onto the Cullens' drive, we were almost there.

"Just remember," she said, "you're all he's got. There's no police, no judge, no court. Either you give him consequences, or he gets away with it."

She'd pulled up outside the house before she spoke, so I knew that the whole house would have heard Alice's parting shot.

Sure enough, Edward moaned, "thank you, Alice, that's very helpful," as we walked into the house.

Alice smirked at him.

I looked around the room. Edward and Jasper would sat next to each other on a couch. Edward was scowling at Alice. Jasper was staring intently at his hands, which were held loosely in his lap. Carlisle and Esme were stood in front of them. Rose and Emmett were leaning against the wall. Rose was looking pretty irritated, but Emmett was grinning broadly. Whatever Edward had been involved in, Emmett was obviously amused.

"We sent Renesmee out with Jacob," Esme told me, "I hope that's alright, Bella."

"I said it was alright," Edward interrupted crossly.

I suppressed a smirk at his sulky tone, "don't worry," I said, "it sounds like a good plan, whoever's plan it was. So, what happened?"

Jasper looked up suddenly, "we were very stupid" he said, looking directly at Alice. "We thought that it would be funny; but we now realise that it was a very badly thought-out plan."

"You know that Carlisle's been having a lot of trouble with that new nurse," Edward interrupted, "we thought of a plan to make her move back to Seattle."

Carlisle didn't look grateful. So, I guess he wasn't involved in making this plan. In fact, he looked pretty cross.

"We decided to convince her that the hospital was haunted" Jasper continued. "We, moved things around, so that she thought there might be a poltergeist And, um . . ." he glanced at Edward, as if wondering if he wanted to take over the story. Edward scowled, but didn't speak. So Jasper carried on, "Edward told her a story about a nurse from years ago, who'd been unfairly dismissed and killed herself. And had vowed to haunt anyone who tried to replace her. Er . . . I hid nearby and amped up the fear a little bit."

"It would have worked," Edward said, "and it's not as though anyone got hurt."

"Yet," Emmett inserted.

Jasper's shoulders slumped and he looked warily at Alice.

Edward looked furiously at Emmett.

"She was very distressed," Carlisle said sternly.

"And, she knows who you are, Edward!" Rosalie added, "it's not exactly inconspicuous, is it? Don't you think that she might have wondered why you were the only one to tell her this story?"

Edward frowned, "I'd have picked up on any suspicions. She certainly didn't think that there was anything creepy about me. She thought that the hospital was creepy and their might be something in the story."

"Edward," Alice said, "you only know what she was thinking when you were there. What if she gives the whole matter a bit more thought later? It's far more likely that you're playing a joke than it is that the hospital is haunted!"

"Exactly," Rose leapt in, "and, once she figures out that this was you, playing a trick. Then she'll wonder how you did it! We don't need humans thinking that you have an uncanny ability to move objects around and flicker lights!"

"In summary," Jasper offered, "we were rather mean to this woman, and we risked drawing unwanted attention to ourselves and our abilities. I'm sorry, Alice."

Alice nodded. "Alright, does anyone else have anything to add?"

"It was kind of funny," Emmett offered.

"I don't think that any real suspicions have been raised," Carlisle said, "I stepped in before Edward's story was quite finished."

"So, we're only talking about a risk of revealing our secret. We're not saying that they actually did," Emmett clarified.

"So we don't have to move. But, there still have to be consequences," Rosalie said.

"All agreed? Jasper and Edward broke family rules and risked revealing our nature."

Emmett sighed, "yeah," he said.

"Yes," Rosalie responded firmly.

"Agreed" said Alice.

"Yes" said Esme.

"Um . . . I guess they did," I muttered, a little confused by this part of the proceedings.

"So, consequences," Carlisle continued.

"Unless there are any objections; I'll speak to Jasper about this privately. As is usual for us, I would like to punish Jasper myself. Can we consider the matter closed?" Alice asked. When she received affirmative nods all around, she turned back to an unusually meek Jasper and said, "go and wait in your study." He nodded sharply and hurried out of the room.

All eyes turned to me.

"Bella, I know that this must be very uncomfortable for you," Carlisle said, "as Edward's mate, of course we all respect your right to determine the best course of action. But, I think that the general feeling is that some sort of punishment would be suitable. If you don't wish to discipline him yourself, I would be more than willing to do so in your stead."

"Bella may not feel that any sort of punishment is suitable," Edward grouched.

"Indeed," Carlisle's eyebrows raised and Edward scowled down at his hands. "Well, Bella, what do you want to do?"

"It wouldn't be fair if Jasper was punished and Edward was let off scott free. They both did the same thing."

"We could call Jasper back," Edward suggested.

Rosalie hissed. Carlisle raised his hand to his forehead.

Esme said softly, "oh, Edward."

Emmett chuckled, "give it up, boy, you are busted."

"I think that we're done discussing Jasper," Alice said, gently, but firmly; "it's time to make a decision, Bella. It can be you or it can be Carlisle, but for the sake of the whole family, someone is going to have to deal with Edward now."

I tried to get Edward's attention. I pulled back my shield and thought what do you want me to do? But he didn't respond in anyway. Maybe he didn't care.

Carlisle came over to me and put his hand on my shoulder. He guided me into the hallway, where he said, "I know that you're worried about this, Bella. You want to do what's best for him. I admire that about you, and I want to help. He'd hate it if I punished him. We've known each other a long time, and we've managed to avoid having that sort of a relationship. I know that I haven't always given him the structure and boundaries that he's needed. But, the friendship that we've developed is a strangely fragile thing. I brought him into this life. A part of him still thinks that I damned him. He cannot respect me in that way. But you . . . Ah, you've saved him in so many ways. I'm his sire, of course, but you're his maker. He would rather submit to you than me. Trust me."

I stared at him. Why had we never spoken of this sort of thing before? Why didn't we have more time to discuss it fully now? Every minute we spent discussing this, Edward was waiting miserably in the lounge and Jasper was waiting miserably in his office. I should be quick.

"I'm Edward's wife; I'm almost a hundred years his junior. Which part of that makes me more suitable for disciplining him than you?"

"You saved his life in Volterra. You love him. You became a vampire in order to be with him. You gave him a child, at the risk of your own life. He adores you. It isn't only love that Edward has for you, it's also reverence."

"You don't think that I'll ruin it all if I start punishing him?"

"I wouldn't advise that you did it too often. But, this probably won't come up again for a while."

"Alright, Carlisle. I trust you."

He smiled warmly at me and gave me a soft kiss on the cheek.

We returned to the rest of the family.

Emmett and Rosalie had gone. Alice was still there, perched on a table and swinging her legs. Esme was sat next to Edward talking quietly to him.

Esme and Edward both looked up when we walked in. Esme patted Edward's hand. He looked from me to Carlisle and back. "What's the decision, Bella?"

"You're coming with me, Edward," I said.

He nodded.

"Now?"

"Right now, you should wait in your room upstairs" Alice said calmly, "Bella and I need to do something."

Edward looked questioningly at me, but I had no idea what she was talking about. So I just shrugged. Edward sighed and left the room. What was the point in arguing with Alice.

"Alright, Bella, come on. Jazz has waited long enough, poor lamb."

"I don't think that he's waiting for me, Alice. Shouldn't I just go and talk to Edward?"

"Talking is a euphemism, Bella, everyone's expecting you to spank him. You can't possibly just talk!"

"That's what Carlisle was talking about? I can't do that! Alice! You're all crazy."

"Yeah, yeah, Bella, it's shocking and surprising. Come on, you'll be fine. You need to come and watch me punish Jasper. After that, you'll be just fine."

"No, Alice, that won't be fine. Won't Jasper hate it?"

"Mmm?" Alice looked distracted, "yes, probably."

Alice strode quickly into Jasper's office. I trailed in behind her, still wondering if she really knew what was going on.

Jasper was stood very smartly in front of his desk. Alice swung herself into his big leather chair.

"Fetch Bella a chair, Jasper," she said.

He barred his head in acquiescence and dashed off.

"Alice?" I hissed, "are you sure about . . ."

"Ugh!" Alice waved a hand in the air, "I'm always sure Bella. I'm a psychic."

Jasper returned with a chair and solicitously helped me into it before returning to his place.

"You know that pretending to be a ghost is silly. Using your gift on humans is dangerous. You could have attracted attention to us. You know how big a risk that is."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Besides which, you led your little brother astray. You ought to be setting a good example for Edward; is that what you did today?"

"No, ma'am."

"Alright, do you have anything to say before you get your thrashing?"

Jasper continued to look straight ahead and spoke very formally. "I'm sorry for letting you down, ma'am. But, do you intend to spank me in full view of Mrs Masen, ma'am?" There was a miserable pause, "I would find that humiliating."

I'd never heard Jasper call me 'Mrs Masen' before. He said it humbly, as though it were a term of respect. If Alice had seemed less stern, I would have offered to leave. Jasper's unhappy request was so hard to hear. But, Alice was definitely in control and I didn't think that I ought to say anything at all.

Alice seemed unmoved by her husband's request. "Jasper, because of your behaviour today Bella is going to have to put her husband over her knee for the first time ever. I am determined that you should set an example for Edward. If you can't be a good example of how to behave, then you can be an example of how to take a beating."

"Yes, ma'am." Jasper's eyes dropped down to the floor.

"Alright, Jasper," there was a softening of Alice's tone, she wasn't pleased to punish Jasper in this way, but she was quite convinced that it was necessary, "it will be over soon. Get ready."

Jasper was nervous. He fiddled with his belt, trying to undo the clasp.

There was a scratching, clinking noise. Jasper couldn't get his belt undone. He pulled at it and tugged, but his fingers were huge with nerves. The humiliation of standing in front of his sister-in-law attempting – and failing – to bear his backside for a spanking was all too much. Embarrassment made his hands clumsy and too large to manipulate the tricky clasp.

His movements grew faster and more desperate as he struggled to obey and began to panic that his slowness would get him into more trouble. His breathing became shallow and fast. I could hear him losing his composure.

"I'm sorry, ma'am," he muttered, "it's new."

Alice slipped round behind him and slid her hands around his waist. At her touch, Jasper instantly began to steady. He breathed a sigh of relief.

"It's alright, I've got it," she said, "calm down, Jazz."

Alice undid Jasper's belt for him, and stayed by his side, resting her hand on his back while he eased his trousers and his underpants down to his ankles. Jasper leant almost imperceptibly into Alice's touch. Even though he knew that she was about to spank him, her hand against his back calmed him. He completed his preparations smoothly and smartly.

He bent over the desk. He crossed his arms and leant over them, hiding his face inside the crook of his right elbow.

Alice kept her left hand resting on Jasper's back, she stepped around to stand at his side. Then she pulled back her right hand and cracked it down hard on Jasper's naked butt. The first smack sounded like an explosion.

The smacks kept coming, each loud crack following quickly after the previous one, it sounded like a firework display. After ten minutes, Jasper's shoulders began to shake. He began to whimper.

"I'm s-s-s-sorry, ma'am." Jasper stuttered.

Alice eased off.

"You're not allowed to use your gift to play pranks on unsuspecting humans." She gave one hard smack at the end to emphasise her point.

Jasper gasped, "No, ma'am. It won't happen again, ma'am."

"You are to set a good" Alice gave a hard smack on 'good', "example to your little brother."

"Yes, ma'am. I will try, ma'am."

"You are not" smack "allowed to risk drawing attention to our family." Alice added another couple of slaps this time.

Jasper whimpered before he managed to get his words out, "No, ma'am. It won't happen again, ma'am."

"I'm going to make sure of that," Alice said sternly.

Then she resumed spanking.

Jasper began to sob.

I had never heard Jasper crying before. He was surprisingly quiet and still. Only his shoulders shook as he gulped and sobbed into his arm.

Finally, Alice was done. After one final smack, she didn't raise her hand again. She left it on Jasper's still white but certainly very sore ass. I was amazed and impressed to see Alice turn her hand instantaneously from an implement of punishment to a source of comfort. As she'd struck Jasper, her hand had been something to fear, but, by not raising it again, by keeping it rested on his sore bottom, Alice had turned her hand back into a soothing reminder of her love. She kept physical contact with Jasper, reassuring him of her continued presence and support as he tried to compose himself again.

The shaking and whimpering continued for a while. We both listened as Jasper fought to regain control of his breathing.

Finally he said, "thank you, ma'am."

Then Alice replied, beginning to stroke her hand up and down his spine, "it's over, Jazz. Are you ready to get dressed?"

"Is Mrs Masen still there?" Jasper asked, in a very small voice. He sounded like a young child who's just woken up with a nightmare.

Still stroking, "yes, sweetheart, she's here."

His groan was almost completely stifled by his sleeve.

"There's not much point worrying about that now," Alice said briskly, "are you ready to get dressed?"

Jasper nodded against the desk, and began to scramble back into his clothes. He managed to fasten the fussy belt back up himself.