Counseling
It was getting late. He should have turned in for the night, just so he could rest his body to prepare for whatever new problems Republic City presented the next day, but Aang found himself unable to fully calm his soul. So silently he sat beneath the pagoda on the far end of the island, his hands folded in his lap and his eyes closed in concentration.
Breath in. Breath out. Yet nothing seemed to change, his mind turning back to his talk with Katara only hours earlier.
"It really won't be that bad," Katara had assured him earlier. "Maybe… maybe we just haven't tried hard enough yet." Maybe that was the case, maybe they really hadn't tried everything, but Aang could not shake the feeling that nothing would change.
And why am I still worrying like this? Aang sighed and furrowed his brow, trying his best to regain focus and meditate in peace.
"Frustrated?" a voice said. Aang opened his eyes and saw a woman seated in front of him. She was dressed in green and brown robes, her face painted with a mixture of white, red, and black makeup.
"Avatar Kyoshi," Aang replied, giving his head a little shake. "I suppose I am a bit frustrated… at myself, mostly."
"Even the greatest of us have our moments of self-doubt," the former Avatar said, nodding her head in agreement. "But tell me, Aang; what is it that is truly troubling you?" Aang chewed his lip for a moment. He respected Kyoshi greatly, but more often than not her advice on his tasks as Avatar had been less than stellar.
No, she can help you… he thought.
"Well… It just seems that everything I've tried to do for the world and the United Republic keeps running into problems," he began. "Some in the Earth Kingdom haven't exactly forgiven us for what they see as 'stealing their land', and there's that issue with the triads that Toph keeps warning me about."
"I know," Kyoshi closed her eyes. "Order and chaos are closely tied together, but I have faith in your friend's ability to make an impact on the triads. But that is not what is troubling you, is it?"
"… No." Aang admitted. "But those things certainly haven't done wonders for me. Really… My problem is my son." There was a long pause as Aang waited for Kyoshi to speak. When it was clear she was holding back to allow Aang to continue, he did so. "Today, Katara decided to test Bumi to see if he was a Bender… You know those kinds of tests, right?" Kyoshi only nodded.
"So, she performed the tests, and…" Aang chewed his lip again. "… She's pretty sure Bumi isn't a Bender." There was another pause before Kyoshi spoke.
"And this is what's troubling you?" Kyoshi asked.
"Yes, but I don't know why." Aang hung his head before continuing. "Part of me wants to justify it, saying 'You're the last Airbender; you need to make sure the art doesn't die with you'. But then I just end up hating myself for it. Bumi's my son; I shouldn't judge him on whether or not he's a Bender, but…" Aang sighed. "But I just… do."
"And you feel that this makes you a horrible person?" Kyoshi asked, as if to finish Aang's train of thought. Once Aang nodded in confirmation, Kyoshi continued. "You are not the only person to have had such worries. It is only human that we wish for our children to continue in the paths we have followed."
"But I still think about everything going wrong," Aang said, looking back up at Kyoshi. "What if I have more children who are Benders? What if I start favoring them over Bumi? What if-"
"Aang, I'd advise you to calm down," Kyoshi said quickly. "You are acting like my second husband when I had the first of our children." Aang quieted down as Kyoshi continued. "You are not the first person that has thought about this problem. Roku sought my advice when his daughter was born, and I myself faced the same dilemma more times than you realize."
"So… you can help me?"
"Of course. As one of your past lives, it is my duty to guide you in the face of adversity."
"Well… I do remember the last time I asked you for advice, you said I should have killed the Fire Lord." At this Kyoshi frowned.
"I fail to see what that has to do with your children." She replied. "Now focus, Aang; what I'm about to show will hopefully provide all the answers you need, but only if you are willing to accept them." Aang was silent, but he did nod and focused his energy. He could feel calm flowing over him, his body tingling as his perception of the world around him changed.
…
When he opened his eyes, he no longer found himself seated on Air Temple Island. He was seated inside a dojo, the walls lined with various weapons and armor. At the center of the room was a collection of young girls, all of them dressed in identical green and brown uniforms. Before them stood Kyoshi, the past Avatar pacing before them. She looked older than she appeared in her spiritual projections, her face lined and her hair showing several streaks of grey, but every step she took revealed the power and dignity of the Avatar.
"Remember, girls, to allow your energy to flow into each of your positions." Kyoshi said, taking up a stance before unfurling one of her fans.
"But what if something blocks us, Master Kyoshi?" one of the younger girls asked.
"Fighting is all a matter of redirection, Lin," Kyoshi continued. "An enemy blocks your strike, you shift to get under his blade. A fortress stalls an advance, you move around to where it cannot guard. By allowing your energy to flow through your body like water," Kyoshi took a few steps forward, changing the position of her body and fan as if she were dodging an enemy's strikes. "You can do all these things quicker than the enemy can respond." With that, Kyoshi snapped her fan shut, twisted around, and threw the fan out towards a nearby tree. The fan sailed through the air before burying itself in the trunk, the impact knocking a few flakes of early snow from the branches.
"That will be all for today, girls." Kyoshi said as she turned back to her awestruck students. "We'll continue with the same drills tomorrow." With that, Kyoshi bowed to her students, the girls doing the same before they began to file out of the dojo.
"You've never truly seen much of my life, have you?" the astral image of Kyoshi said from Aang's side as they watched the Kyoshi of memory retrieve her fan.
"Other than when you defeated Chin the Conqueror, no." Aang replied. "I've been meaning to brush up a little, but with all the turmoil in the world I don't really have the chance to."
"Fair enough." Kyoshi replied with a shrug as they followed her memory out of the dojo. "I gave up my position as Grand Secretariat of the Earth Kingdom shortly after my third marriage. For the last forty years of my life I stayed here, helping Kyoshi Island grow strong while checking to make sure that the Earth Kingdom did not slide back into old habits." There was a long pause. "I… suppose I should have been more vigilant."
"What happened with the Dai Li wasn't your fault," Aang said to reassure his past life. "There's no way you could have foreseen it falling like it did."
"True…" there was another pause. By now the memory of Kyoshi had wandered into town. It was smaller than Aang remembered, with even fewer buildings than when he had first visited, but there were still plenty of people milling about.
"Avatar Kyoshi!" Kyoshi turned as two men carrying a piece of parchment hurried toward her. "Sorry for disturbing you, but we have a finalized version of your statue, if you would like to review it."
"Of course," Kyoshi took the scroll from the man. "But you know you don't have to do this for me. The small museum you made in my honor was enough."
"But this is to show our appreciation for your protection and service of the community," the man replied. "We still cannot express our thanks for all that you have done."
"If you say so." Kyoshi unfurled the scroll, scanning it while Aang looked on. It was much the same as the one he remembered, Kyoshi standing proudly with one fan over her chest, the other held out to her side.
"Wouldn't putting it up so high make it difficult to maintain?" Kyoshi asked.
"Well… yes." The man replied, sheepishly massaging the back of his head. "But anyone else can put a statue on the ground. No, this is a centerpiece for the island, to show our devotion and love for you."
"You flatter me." Kyoshi rolled the scroll up before handing it back to the man. "All appears to be in order. I'll still be around for the next month if you need any more input."
"Of course. Thank you, Avatar." The man said quickly, bowing before departing with his comrade.
"And you don't have to call me 'Avatar' all the time!" Kyoshi called after him, though she knew it would be fruitless. With a small chuckle she continued, skirting the edge of the crowd so she did not make too much of a fuss.
"I don't want to sound ungrateful," Aang said, turning to Kyoshi's image. "But this doesn't really seem to be telling me a lot."
"Actually, I think this should be very familiar," Kyoshi countered. "From your experiences as the Avatar, you know of the reverence people will give you if you even so much as walk through a crowd. As one of the oldest Avatars of the era, that was a continuous aspect of my life… and sometimes a detrimental one."
"I can see that," Aang looked back as Kyoshi's memory approached a smaller house near the southern end of town. "But I guess that there's more here?"
"Yes." Kyoshi closed her eyes as her memory entered her home. "If I was troubled by what people saw of me as the Avatar, imagine the stress that would be imparted on my children."
"Koko, I'm home!" Kyoshi called as she stepped into her home. When there was no answer, she merely shrugged and pulled out her fans, setting them down on a rack with a few other weapons she owned. "Did you have a good day at school?" she called, but once again there was no answer.
She can't be very far away… Kyoshi thought. Probably just playing. Thoughts of play were dashed when Kyoshi listened and heard… crying. Everything around her blacked out as Kyoshi rushed towards the sound, energy building inside her in case her daughter was hurt or in danger.
She did not have to get far, for her daughter was seated just out the back door of the house. She was a small girl, not much older than five, her hair cut short and held in place by a headband. She had her back to Kyoshi, and sitting before her was a rock about the size of a bucket.
"Koko?" Kyoshi asked, calming her energy as she made her way to her daughter. "Sweetie, what's wrong?"
"Momma… I-I-I can't…" the girl stammered through her crying. "I can't do it."
"Can't do what?" Kyoshi asked. Koko did not answer her immediately, instead standing up and pushing her hands towards the rock. She did this several times, her actions becoming more rapid with desperation, but the rock refused to budge. Finally, the girl gave one final, feeble push before collapsing, a fresh stream of tears running down her face.
"I can't do it, Momma. I can't Bend…" Kyoshi sat in silence, her energy dropping into a pit in her stomach as she watched her daughter's despair.
"Koko, you can't know for sure," Kyoshi began. "You're still young; maybe your powers just haven't-"
"No, I can't do it!" Koko cried. "You said you could Bend when you were a baby, a-and I've always tried to Bend whenever I could. B-but nothing ever happens; I c-can't even move a pebble. I-I-I can't do it." The young girl continued to cry, and Kyoshi chewed her lip for a moment before kneeling and pulling Koko towards her, holding the child close to her body to calm her down.
"Shh, it's okay…" Kyoshi said, running a hand down her daughter's back. "It'll be alright."
"No it won't," Koko replied, her face buried in Kyoshi's shoulder. "I can't Bend, a-and no one will like me… You won't like me." Kyoshi furrowed her brow at this before pulling Koko back slightly, so she could look the girl in the eye.
"Now where did you get a ridiculous idea like that?" Kyoshi asked. Koko sniffed before speaking.
"Y-you're the Avatar, and you're this great Bender who can do so much. Y-you said you really liked other Benders, b-but I can't Bend, so you won't like me anymore." Kyoshi frowned. Was that really what Koko had reasoned about her?
"I said I greatly respected other, capable Benders," she said, reaching up to dry some of the child's tears. "Just because I respect them does not mean I look down upon those that cannot Bend. Do you ever see me treating your father or my students lesser because they cannot Bend?"
"N-no… But wouldn't you want me to be a Bender? You'd like that, right?" Kyoshi was silent for a moment, her mind a flurry as she tried to pick out the right thing to say to Koko. The young girl stared up at her, eyes sparkling with tears.
"Truly… I don't really care if you are a Bender or not." Koko raised an eyebrow at this.
"Why?" she asked.
"Because Bender or not, you are still my daughter." Kyoshi pulled Koko closer to her again before continuing. "The day you were born was one of the happiest days of my life, and you continue to amaze me with how beautiful and intelligent you've grown." Kyoshi looked down at her daughter. "Nothing could change how proud I am to be your mother, and nothing will stop me from loving you."
"B-but I'd still like to be a Bender…" Koko mumbled.
"Many people would," Kyoshi agreed with a shrug. "But if I was given a choice between you and my powers, I would not hesitate to give them all up for you."
"Really?"
"Really." Kyoshi was silent for a moment, giving her daughter a reassuring smile. "Now, I don't want to hear any more of this nonsense about me not loving you because you can't Earthbend."
"But what if someone else says it?" Koko asked.
"Then they will have to deal with me." Koko gave a little frown at this, fully understanding the might of the Avatar. "Besides, there are other ways for you to grow stronger. How would you like to join me tomorrow to help train the Warriors?"
"Um… I thought I wasn't old enough." Koko started. "You said I needed to be eight before I could join…"
"You would only be doing basic drills, anyway." Kyoshi smiled again. "And you are truly an amazing young girl; I think it would be foolish for me to deny you on account of your age."
"Really?" Koko asked, her eyes brightening. "So I can help you fight and everything?"
"As I said: basic drills." Kyoshi said with a chuckle, giving her daughter a small tickle. "Now, why don't you get washed up for dinner, and we can talk to your father once he gets home." Koko nodded, breaking from Kyoshi's grasp before hurrying into the house.
"Momma?" she said, stopping at the top of the steps.
"Yes, Sweetie?"
"I love you, Momma." The girl said, giving Kyoshi a toothy smile.
"I love you too, Koko."
Aang found himself smiling as well, even as the images began to fade back into nothingness. Soon, he would be back on Air Temple Island, with his thoughts and his past life as his only companions.
…
"So?" Kyoshi asked once they returned to the present. "Does this help you understand your problem?"
"I think so." Aang replied, straightening up a little. "I might have my worries, but I need to remember that Bumi is my son first and foremost. It doesn't matter if he or any of my children can Bend, only that I continue to support them in whatever they do in life."
"Very good." There was a pause before Aang spoke again.
"Although… I'm still worried about the fate of Airbending." He admitted.
"Don't worry; I'm sure the universe would not allow itself to fall that far out of balance." Kyoshi began to fade away, but Aang could still hear her voice in the air. "Not with such a capable Avatar to guide it." And with that, Kyoshi was gone, and silence reigned once again. Aang took another breath to calm his energy, watching as the last hints of sunlight dipped below the horizon.
Have I really been out that late? He thought, shaking his head before rising. Guess time just slipped away from me for a moment. Aang dusted himself off before turning to head inside, a cool breeze wafting in from the west as he walked. It was quiet within the temple, the Air Acolytes having turned in for the night, allowing Aang a few more moments of peace as he roamed the halls.
As he walked, he took a little more time to think of what Kyoshi had shown him. It seems simple, really, to just do a better job and reach out more. Bumi was his son, no matter what, and he was not about to let his fears and trepidations get the better of him.
"Aang?" Aang was shaken from his thoughts by Karata's voice. She was standing just outside a nearby door, a concerned look on her face. "You're out pretty late. Is something wrong?"
"No, nothing's wrong," Aang replied, crossing over to Katara. "Coming to check up on me?"
"Of course. We both know you get really loopy when you don't sleep." The two chuckled for a moment before Aang spoke again.
"How's Bumi?" he asked. There was a pause before Katara spoke again.
"He's asleep now…" she said, looking down for a moment. "He might try to see if he can Bend tomorrow… I-I'm not sure what I should tell him if he can't…" Aang wrapped his arm around his wife and pulled her into a tight hug.
"It'll be alright, Sweetie," he said. "It's only Bending, after all. As long as we still show him we love him, he'll be fine."
"I know… I was just so worried about all this, I guess it got the better of me."
"Don't worry; I know exactly what you were thinking." there was a pause before Katara pulled away from him.
"Was that what you were meditating about?"
"Yeah," Aang shrugged, and for a moment he thought he saw the silhouette of Avatar Kyoshi out of the corner of his eye. "I guess I just needed a bit of counseling on a few matters."
This has been an idea that's been floating around in my head for some time. I figured I'd get it out on paper now before I end up forgetting about it.
I don't own Avatar or its related characters. Reviews and favorites are appreciated, and if I screwed something up please let me know.