-1Hi all! So this is fairly self-explanatory; a one-shot that takes off after Jim's interview in The Job. It struck me that when he was asked where he saw himself in ten years, he really struggled to answer. So this answers that question in 5 different ways! If you read, review!
The Long Haul
He thinks about it.
Long after the interview is over and he is sitting in the lobby once again, not yet ready to go outside and track down Karen, Jim's mind is occupied - no, haunted, he is haunted - by that one simple question.
Where do you see yourself in ten years?
It shouldn't be so hard to come up with an answer. Most people - most normal people, and Jim has always prided himself on retaining a sense of normalcy while working in the asylum that is Dunder Mifflin - have some idea of where they want their lives to end up. Happily married or partner at a huge law firm or whatever. People usually know what they want.
Not him. He's just a guy who took a sales job right out of college because the pay was good and, hell, he was bored. And for a while he didn't mind it, and then they hired this new receptionist with curly hair and the most fascinating laugh, and then he had to get out.
But where can he go from here?
XXX
He doesn't get the job.
Karen doesn't either and Michael ... Michael never had a chance, not really, but who is Jim to judge someone for clinging to a hopeless cause? It goes to some other applicant, somebody who probably doesn't know what they're getting into, but Jim can't muster up much disappointment.
He's been in Scranton so long, he can't imagine being anywhere else.
Pam's still there, too, although he can tell she's getting anxious. She's started wearing heels to work sometimes, straightening her hair a few days a week. One day, he wanders over to her desk and finds her signing up for art classes at the local college.
"Planning on a career change?" he asks, and there's a desperate edge to his chuckle that he knows she can hear, too. His fists clench and he would reach for a jelly bean but she's stopped refilling the jar.
She jumps, looks a little guilty. "Maybe." There was a time when she would have elaborated; confessed how nervous she was or maybe asked his opinion on which pieces she should include in her portfolio, but it's not like that between them anymore. "We'll see, I guess."
Later, in the breakroom, Karen makes fun of his ham and cheese sandwich; teasing him about growing up and trying new things. She mentions his hair, too, and he's just starting to feel defensive when Pam comes in and goes straight to the vending machine. He raises his voice to ask Karen where she wants to go for dinner and pretends not to notice that Pam doesn't even glance in his direction.
She still brings yogurt every day, but it's always different flavors now. None of them in the berry family, and he can't imagine how it would taste to lick lemon or peach off her lips.
XXX
New York is a big city and he wasn't lying in his interview, it has this energy about it that is almost contagious. He'll never tell, but that's the reason he takes the job. Not because of the "career opportunities", not because of his relationship with Karen, but because he desperately needs some kind of enthusiasm in his life again.
Climbing the corporate ladder is easy for both of them; they're the freaking Brangelina of the Dunder-Mifflin social circle. He knows all the best jokes and she looks great in a cocktail dress. They find a decently-priced apartment and he hosts a weekly poker game and maybe it's not the life he'd always imagined for himself, but it's something.
When the time finally comes to close the Scranton branch, he thinks the least he can do is tell Michael in person. He makes the four hour drive in three and pretends it's because he just wants to get it over with.
"Welcome to Dunder-Mifflin," says a matronly woman seated at Pam's desk. She smiles at him like nothing is wrong, like his whole damn world hasn't just caved in. "How can I help you?"
He and Michael trade bad news quickly. Scranton is being shut down and Pam gave her notice months ago and for once, neither of them have anything funny to say. They shake hands at the end and then Michael grabs his shoulder and says, really seriously, "She did miss you, Jimbo. We all did."
Jim doesn't know what to say to that, so he just nods and gets into his car. Karen is waiting for him in New York with takeout pizza, but he takes his time driving back to the city he still doesn't call home.
XXX
Jim gets the job and Karen takes him out to celebrate. She kind of ... glows all through dinner and he knows it has nothing to do with his promotion. She's been looking for a way to get them out of Scranton for a long time.
The first few months are good - the work is actually a little bit of a challenge, which is a nice change of pace, and Karen isn't any challenge at all, which, you know, is a big step up for him. No more grasping at straws and sentences that trail off awkwardly. He's Well-Adjusted!Jim now and he's got the business suit and serious haircut to prove it.
They break up about a year into it, for the most mundane reason he can think of. "We've changed," Karen tells him gently over pasta that still crunches a little when he bites into it. For an Italian, she's a pretty bad cook. "We want different things now, Jim."
He nods and chews his linguine and thinks, no, he still wants what he's always wanted. But then, he guesses that's the real problem.
She packs her things and he helps her carry the boxes to a waiting cab. They hug good-bye. It's so amicable that no one at work picks up on their separation for at least two weeks. Jim doesn't exactly relish being a bachelor again, but his heart isn't broken either, and he doesn't want to think about what that probably means about their whole relationship.
Weeks go by, then months, and he starts to date again, but it's never serious. The women in New York are too tall, too loud, and they'd all rather eat at an expensive restaurant than be served his grilled cheese while watching reality TV.
He's not trying to recapture anything, but it's missing just the same.
XXX
Karen gets the job and it's not like Jim is relieved, but he does feel like, okay, yes, the pressure's off. She asks him to move with her, like they'd discussed, but he hesitates a beat too long and her eyes darken. He stays quiet on the drive back to Scranton and she doesn't ask again.
Pam comes by his desk the next day, after Karen has come in to gather her things, and tells him, "I'm really sorry you didn't get the job."
He fiddles with his pencil and then he sets it down, very deliberately, and says, "I'm not."
They start officially dating a week later and a collective sigh of relief breathes through the office staff. With Jim back for good and Karen gone and Pam smiling again, life gets a little easier for everyone.
A few months go by and Pam gets offered a job at a graphic arts firm in Connecticut and Jim says, "You have to take it. We can do long-distance." She doesn't look convinced and he wraps his arms around her. "We can do anything."
So she goes and he stays and it works for a while. Gas prices are a bitch and his phone bill goes through the roof, but it's bearable because every weekend he gets to watch as Pam changes with the New England seasons. Her hair gets lighter, her wardrobe brighter, and the distance between them grows and grows.
Jim gets offered a promotion and, that weekend, shakes his head at her over their coffee and bagels. "If I take it, that's it," he says. "I'm stuck."
"I remember that feeling," she laughs, squeezing his shoulder. "Want some more coffee?"
She gets up and busies herself at the counter, clatters some dishes around, starts to hum. None of the noises can drown out what she didn't say, what he'd been hoping she'd say. They've talked about him moving in before, but she keeps avoiding the issue. It's a lot like before, the back-and-forth dance they perfected in the past, except things have changed now. She has changed.
He takes the promotion and doesn't put the pay increase towards gas.
XXX
The interview ends and Jim jumps into his car, starts driving without even being aware of where he's going. When he hits the highway, he dials Karen on his cell phone and starts to apologize profusely. She hangs up on him thirty-seven seconds into the call and the dial tone in his ear sounds a lot like a wake-up call.
He arrives at the office just as dusk is setting in, but he knows somehow that Pam is still going to be there. Sure enough, she's in the conference room filming a talking-head, her back to him as he approaches. "Pam. Hey." He spares the camera a single glance. "Sorry. Are you free for dinner tonight?"
She flounders for a second, then seems to find her voice. "Yes."
"Great." It's all he can do not to jump for joy. "Then it's a date."
They leave straight from the office, taking separate cars to an Italian restaurant he's always passed by but never actually been in. He tries to bribe the host with a single dollar bill and Pam's silent laughter makes her shoulders shake next to his. When they're finally led to a table (though not the corner booth he'd been aiming for), he pulls out her chair and she beams at him like he's just invented the wheel.
They agree not to talk about work at all and share a slice of chocolate cake for dessert and he pretends not to watch as she licks the fudge off her lips. He walks her to her car and they linger in the parking lot, laughing over the latest episode of The Apprentice and Jim's dead-on impression of Donald Trump.
"I had a good time tonight," Pam finally says, fiddling with her keys and looking up at him through lowered lashes. "I guess ... I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Yeah, definitely." Jim grins and stuffs his hands in his pockets to keep from grabbing her. "Tomorrow."
Pam nods and gets in the car, toys with the radio dials for a minute. Just as she's about to pull out of the parking space, Jim knocks on the window and gestures for her to roll it down. "Forgot something," he says, and then he's bending himself in half and molding his lips to hers, putting everything he's never said into the kiss.
XXX
"Jim?" Frowning, Pam waves her fingers in front of his face. They're having lunch on the roof of the Scranton office, hiding out from Michael. They've been dating for a month, but their boss still hasn't grown tired of making inappropriate sexual innuendos every time he finds them together. "Earth to Jim. Where are you?"
He shakes himself out of his reverie, grabbing her hand so that he can bring her knuckles to his lips. "Exactly where I want to be," he says, and smiles.