Game: Dynasty Warriors
Genre: Humour
Disclaimer: I don't own Dynasty Warriors just the characters I made up.
Summary: This is a little introduction to my OC's. Since it will take a while to post my stories. So my OC's are being interviewed by the original characters with hilarious results!
WARNING: Don't steal my characters! If ya do I'll come after you!
Z Star: I'm the author of Dynasty Warriors Poetry. If you haven't read my poems or talked to me before hi! This is my first DW story, I hope you like it.
New Officers?
Introductions
The whole Kingdom will go mad, for they cannot find good officers anymore…
"Ok let's try this again…" Sun Jian grumbled rubbing his temples.
"It's so hard to find good warriors days!" Liu Bei snarled leaning his head on his hand.
"EVERYONE IS BLEEDING CRAZY OR COMPLETLY… COMPLETELY… I CAN'T FIND A CLEAN WORD FOR WHAT I'M THINKING RIGHT NOW!" Cao Cao yelled loud enough for all of china to hear and slammed his table.
"The next applicant that comes in, you can have him!" Dong Zhou said.
"Shut up you big fat pig!" Yuan Shao screamed at the slob for no reason.
Everyone was stressed out… and it wasn't because of the new soldiers. Everyone in the three kingdoms army was there. Wei, Wu and Shu were there, even Zhang Liao, Zuo Ci, Yuan Shao and Meng Huo. All of the greatest leaders were there. Well… if you can call all of them great.
"Who are you calling a pig you self absorbed… Eh… Diao Chan! Make up a good insult!" Dong Zhou ordered.
"Finish your own damn sentences!" Diao Chan snapped at her fat lord. "Besides Yuan Shao has a right to call you a pig… you look like one…"
"WHAT! HOW DARE YOU DEFY ME!" Dong Zhou screamed.
"Oh come on, you know she's only putting up with you so she can have Lu Bu kill you and make her father happy!" Sun Shang Xiang pointed out in a nonchalant way.
"WHAAAA?" Everyone exclaimed looking at the Wu Princess. Among the stares was a glare coming from a certain songstress we all know. Boy was she in for it later…
"Hehe… Nothing! I said nothing!" Sun Xiang grinned covering her tracks. It would have been easier if she didn't nearly fall off her chair.
You see what I mean? With each other's hate for one another, nothing but chaos could come from this…
"Why did we have to do these interviews TOGETHER anyway?" Sima Yi growled. "I mean, wouldn't it make more sense if we let people go to the kingdom they wanted to join, instead of having to bear each other's company?"
"Yeah that would make more sense, but someone thought there be less pressure on the citizens of china if we picked the warriors suited to each kingdom! That doesn't make any bloody sense!"
"Stupid Emperor! Stupid author of the story!" Everyone whispered under their breath.
"Ahem!" Coughed the foot soldier that had been watching the whole scene in silence. "Excuse me my Lords-"
"AHEM!" All the girls snapped.
"And Ladies. But another candidate is ready for another interview." The soldier smiled.
"ARGH!" Everyone groaned. Some of them banged their heads on tables, massaged their aching heads and some of them even sharpened their weapons.
"Fine! Bring him or her in." Sun Jian said, not looking forward to meeting another officer.
"I swear if it's another Mary-Sue I cut her open!" Zhen Ji growled.
"You won't be able to with that flute." Cao Pi said above a whisper.
"What's wrong with my flute?" Zhen Ji asked.
"Well you can hardly call a flute a weapon can you! It doesn't even have a blade!" Cao Pi exclaimed.
"SHUT UP YOU INSENSITIVE BEAST! HOW COULD YOU TALK TO YOUR WIFE LIKE THAT!" Zhen Ji cried slapping the first emperor of Wei across the face. Everyone gasped at the sight. And at Cao Pi's bewildered face. "That will teach you to give me some respect!"
And she sat back down like nothing happened.
"Too bad these officers can't be more like Li Wen." Liu Bei sighed. "He never looks for revenge, he isn't a bad ass and most importantly he's NORMAL!" Everyone in the kingdoms besides Shu growled, grunted and glared at the virtuous king.
(A.N: Li Wen belongs to ecnal nogardnap.)
"Li Wen is so great! Li Wen is so normal! Why don't you just marry him!" Cao Cao spat at the green leader.
"Shut up! You're just jealous that you can't find a good officer anymore!" Liu Bei pouted crossing his arms.
"Yeah! Don't make fun of Li Wen!" Xing Cai said. "You haven't even met the guy yet you're ready to make fun of him!"
"He joined Shu though…" Cao Cao pointed out.
"So?"
"I can make plenty of insults for Shu!"
"OoO LET ME AT HIM! LET ME AT HIM!" Xing Cai growled taking out her fork and shield, but unfortunately her father was holding her back.
"Easy girl, just ignore the goat." Zhang Fei cooed.
"GOAT!"
"My lords!" A soldier interrupted.
"AHEM!"
"And Ladies." The young man sweat dropped. "The New recruits are in the next room waiting for you..."
To be continued…
Z Star: That's more of a prologue then a chapter but next chapter you'll start seeing some of my characters Ok? Please don't flame me Ok, because it will get better. This fic was inspired by my friend ecnal nogardnap. Thank you!