It was the night before his sister's wedding and Luke was caught between
delight that his sister and best friend had finally found happiness with
each other, and.....something else. He did not understand why he felt this
deep sense of loss and sadness, or why he feared his twin's coming
nuptials.
"Get a grip Skywalker," he admonished himself as he climbed out of bed, too wound up for sleep. "Why am I sad about the most wonderful day of my Leia's life? Gods above, she deserves it." Looking at the picture he had of his "family" he smiled to himself. They were there. All of them. Han, Leia, Chewie all smiling back at him, while the droids stood behind them, Threepio looking just as miserable as ever.
He had never had a family before, not really. His Aunt and Uncle had tolerated him, liked him even, but always there was that underlying feeling that he did not belong. Even Camie, Fixer and the gang had never really accepted him. He had always been different, someone to humour, just "wormie". And then he had met Leia and for the first time he had felt real love. True, he misinterpreted his love for her in the beginning, but always there had been a strong bond that nobody without hindsight could explain.
He had felt needed. After the destruction of her home planet, Leia had needed him. When Han was frozen in carbonite, Leia had needed him. She had needed him when she learned the true identity of their father, and when she had had to face the agonizing choice between Han and Isolder.
The split second in which he realized what this sad emotion was hit him hard. He was scared of being needed no longer. Now that Leia was getting married, surly the hard times for her were over? Would he ever be needed again? He grew angry with himself. "My sister is getting married, she is finally finding happiness and I'm sat here wondering how it will affect myself," he thought, furious at his selfishness.
The door opened. Luke quickly jumped under the sheets and looked at his sister's petite frame silhouetted against the door. "Sorry to bother you Luke" said Leia sitting down on the end of his bed. "I just could not sleep.is something bothering you?" Luke smiled, hugged her. "Just hoping I don't mess up my best man's speech tomorrow" She kissed his forehead, and Luke could sense the excitement inside her, the heartfelt happiness and nervousness. "You don't think I believe that do you?" Leia asked with an impish smile. "There's something else isn't there?" Luke looked at the floor. She would not let it drop, he knew her well enough to know that. "Leia" he began slowly "Will you always need me?"
Leia looked back at him in surprise. "That's a strange question" she stated and looked him in the eye. He turned away, unable to meet her gaze, ashamed of his foolishness. "I'm sorry," he whispered. Leia did not have Skywalker blood her for nothing, and she sensed what was wrong. Cupping his face in her hands, she forced him to look at her and said softly "No Luke I probably wont always need you in the way I have before. I may not need you in my life, but I will always want you in my life. You are my brother, my twin, my best friend and my soul mate. Nothing, not even death will change that"
Luke felt a warm flush run through his body. He was wanted. Never before had it occurred to him that people might be around him because they simply wanted to. Always, there had been a reason, they had needed him. She wanted him in her life. His sister, his friend for life, would not desert him even in the realms of matrimony.
Holding her close to him he felt a feeling of contentment. His "family" would be even closer after tomorrow, and he was wanted in it.
"Get a grip Skywalker," he admonished himself as he climbed out of bed, too wound up for sleep. "Why am I sad about the most wonderful day of my Leia's life? Gods above, she deserves it." Looking at the picture he had of his "family" he smiled to himself. They were there. All of them. Han, Leia, Chewie all smiling back at him, while the droids stood behind them, Threepio looking just as miserable as ever.
He had never had a family before, not really. His Aunt and Uncle had tolerated him, liked him even, but always there was that underlying feeling that he did not belong. Even Camie, Fixer and the gang had never really accepted him. He had always been different, someone to humour, just "wormie". And then he had met Leia and for the first time he had felt real love. True, he misinterpreted his love for her in the beginning, but always there had been a strong bond that nobody without hindsight could explain.
He had felt needed. After the destruction of her home planet, Leia had needed him. When Han was frozen in carbonite, Leia had needed him. She had needed him when she learned the true identity of their father, and when she had had to face the agonizing choice between Han and Isolder.
The split second in which he realized what this sad emotion was hit him hard. He was scared of being needed no longer. Now that Leia was getting married, surly the hard times for her were over? Would he ever be needed again? He grew angry with himself. "My sister is getting married, she is finally finding happiness and I'm sat here wondering how it will affect myself," he thought, furious at his selfishness.
The door opened. Luke quickly jumped under the sheets and looked at his sister's petite frame silhouetted against the door. "Sorry to bother you Luke" said Leia sitting down on the end of his bed. "I just could not sleep.is something bothering you?" Luke smiled, hugged her. "Just hoping I don't mess up my best man's speech tomorrow" She kissed his forehead, and Luke could sense the excitement inside her, the heartfelt happiness and nervousness. "You don't think I believe that do you?" Leia asked with an impish smile. "There's something else isn't there?" Luke looked at the floor. She would not let it drop, he knew her well enough to know that. "Leia" he began slowly "Will you always need me?"
Leia looked back at him in surprise. "That's a strange question" she stated and looked him in the eye. He turned away, unable to meet her gaze, ashamed of his foolishness. "I'm sorry," he whispered. Leia did not have Skywalker blood her for nothing, and she sensed what was wrong. Cupping his face in her hands, she forced him to look at her and said softly "No Luke I probably wont always need you in the way I have before. I may not need you in my life, but I will always want you in my life. You are my brother, my twin, my best friend and my soul mate. Nothing, not even death will change that"
Luke felt a warm flush run through his body. He was wanted. Never before had it occurred to him that people might be around him because they simply wanted to. Always, there had been a reason, they had needed him. She wanted him in her life. His sister, his friend for life, would not desert him even in the realms of matrimony.
Holding her close to him he felt a feeling of contentment. His "family" would be even closer after tomorrow, and he was wanted in it.