My second attempt to write something in English. Tell me what you think :)
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be…
Chapter one
It was a cold winter night in Detroit. The stars were shinning bright like a sharp silver blade upon a pitch black piece of fabric. Their glow was the only bright thing in the night sky. Darkness had covered every corner of the city. It was late. Really late and everything was quiet. Andie's eyes hovered in the endless sky searching for the moon. After a while, she found it trapped between some big grey clouds. 'Trapped' she whispered to herself. That's how she felt… Trapped and miserable. She shivered as the freezing cold breeze messed her hair up. Brown curls were whipping her smooth face hard. She didn't try to stop it, she didn't even move.
'' Babe? What are you doing? Come back to bed. '' Jack's sleepy voice broke the silence. He sounded confused; he couldn't understand what she was thinking. Andie didn't answer. On Jack's face appeared nothing but terror. He knew something was wrong; he felt it.
'' Andie? '' He asked again. But he received no answer. Jack jumped off the bed throwing the covers on the wooden floor. He took slow steps towards her and when he was finally close enough, he sat on the window sill next to her.
'' Are you ok? '' He asked. His voice was deeper than usual. He was really upset but tried his best not to show. For a moment that felt like ages Andie kept looking at the sky; quiet and motionless. After that moment, she finally talked…
'' Why wouldn't I? '' She said looking straight into his blue eyes. Her crystal voice indicated nostalgia. Nostalgia for something not even she knew what it was. Jack stayed quiet for a moment. Waves of thoughts flood his mind as he desperately tried to understand why she was acting like this. Her face seemed completely emotionless. It was a frightening thing to stare at.
'' I don't know. You tell me. '' Jack lowered his voice, it was really smooth now. His long fingers started running up and down from her shoulder to her palm. Her skin was cold as ice, pale as death. Instead of answering, Andie glanced away from him again. '' Let's go back to bed. It's freezing cold up here. '' Jack had never been so worried about anything or anyone in his entire life.
'' I don't feel cold. '' Andie whispered, so low, she sounded to Jack as if she were speaking from the bottom of the abyss. Then she continued. '' I don't feel anything. '' He could barely hear her.
'' But I do. Come on, let's go inside. Do it for me. '' He had to get her inside. He had to do it; with or without her will. Andie cracked a smile and turned her head to face him.
'' You're lying. '' Her voice sounded husky as if she were sick.
'' I'm not. '' Jack replied trying to sound as honest as he could.
'' You're just afraid that I'll jump and kill myself. '' She stated the obvious. That was exactly what Jack was thinking. He couldn't lie to her, but he didn't give up trying.
'' What? Baby no. I know you would never do that. I know you would never hurt me this way. '' He wanted to believe that. He wanted to believe she knew how important she was to him. Without her he was just a fucked up kid trying to be a rock star. Without her he was nothing. He loved her more than he loved his own life. She lowered her head and smiled a little. Jack took her face in his hands and looked her in the eyes. '' Please. '' He begged her as if his life depended on it. Andie felt her eyes filling with tears. He was the only person she had. The only one she cared about. Dark clouds had covered his beautiful face. He was sad. She felt disgusted; disgusted with her own self.
'' Ok. '' Before she could even realize it Jack was inside her room helping her get off the window sill. When she was finally safe, he closed the window and wrapped his strong arms around her waist. He was only inches away from her now. Andie felt her breath catch in her throat as his blue eyes bore into hers. Before she knew it he was cupping her cheek with his hand, his head slowly leaning in. Andie closed her eyes; her heart was pounding in her chest. Every kiss was like their first kiss. Jack's lips touched hers. His touch was soft and passionate. Andie felt his other hand against her back, pulling her closer. Their lips melded together perfectly as if they were meant to be. When they finally pulled away from each other Jack intertwined his fingers with hers and held her hand up, kissing it gently.
'' You scared the crap out of me, you know. '' He whispered. They were so close; she could feel his sweet breath on her lips.
'' Sorry. '' Andie said, playing with his golden hair.
'' Promise me you will never do this to me again. '' He said in a serious tone. Their eyes were still locked together.
'' I promise. '' She mumbled behind her teeth.
'' Sorry, I didn't hear you. You promise what? '' Jack teased her. He really wanted to make her laugh. He felt like she needed it. They both needed it.
'' Oh shut up. '' She punched him in the chest and slightly pushed him away.
'' You're going to regret this. '' The instant these words left his mouth, Jack lifted her from the ground; toss her over his shoulder and started walking towards the bed.
'' Put me down! '' Andie screamed. No matter how hard she tried to make herself sound mad at him, she couldn't make it. She gave up the act and started laughing in hysterics.
'' As you wish. '' Jack said as he threw her on the bed. He lay on top of her; his face was a few inches from hers. They both stared at each other for a moment. Neither spoke, because neither had any breath to speak with. Andie wanted to kiss him and then slap him. SLAP HIM HARD. She was under his dominion and that made her furious. She had to take the upper hand.
'' Surrender. '' Jack muttered in her ear as if he knew what she was thinking.
'' Never! '' Andie shouted angrily. She tried to move but she couldn't. Jack had straddled her hips to prevent any escape.
'' Is this your last word? '' He asked in a sexy voice.
'' Never, never, never! '' Andie screamed in his face again.
'' Very well… '' He said with a cheeky smirk playing on his lips.
Now, if there's something you should know about Jack is that he loved to tickle girls. Yes, he LOVED to tickle girls. It was his biggest turn-on. Tickling Andie has been the one thing he loved and the one thing she hated. With both hands, he grabbed her waist and began to tickle her intensely. She writhed and giggled as she tried to move away from him, but she felt so weak in his hands.
'' Now, I want to hear you say 'I surrender Jack. ' '' He said, still tickling her.
'' N-n-nohahahaa! '' Was basically all she could say, as she tried not to surrender. Jack smiled and added more pressure to his tickling. After a few moments of this, she caved in…
'' I surrender! '' She screamed through her laughter. But Jack didn't stop. His fingers slipped under her shirt, grazing her stomach. Andie felt his lips on her skin. He was passionately kissing every inch of her body; from her belly to her neck. His hot breath on her exposed skin made her shiver. She bit her lower lip trying to keep a moan from leaving her mouth. '' Jack '' she breathed out his name, his teeth nibbling at her neck, her shoulder and earlobe. His hands roamed across her body, cupping her buttocks and the sides of her breasts. She helped him as he tried to remove her shirt from her body. Once he did, he threw it across the room. Their lips met and started kissing hungrily. This time Andie moaned into him as their tongues battled for dominance. She couldn't get enough of him. His hands wandered to her breasts, her bra still there. Jack raised his head to look her in the eyes. Those beautiful huge brown eyes he loved so much.
'' I love you. '' He admitted. The depth of his voice made her heart melt.
'' I love you. '' She replied with a smile on her face. In moments like these she felt so happy. He was the only person who could make her forget her sadness and be happy again. They were both damaged in their own way but somehow, being together helped them get better. Jack trailed his lips down the front of her throat into her breasts. Andie threw her hands around his neck, her fingers curling in his smooth blonde hair. She wanted him to remove her bra. She wished there was nothing between her skin, and his hand.
'' Do it. '' She gasped. Her hand touched his cheek gently. Jack opened his eyes and smiled a little. But his smile died the moment he caught a glimpse on her wrist. An expression of terror appeared on his face. He wanted to speak but he couldn't. Andie's heart dropped when she realized why he acted like this. Jack stared at the purple bruises and the long scratches that covered his girlfriend's skin.
'' Jack? '' She asked tentatively. Jack got out of bed slowly. He breathed out and started walking up and down the room. He looked petrified.
'' Jack, are you ok? '' She asked again and jumped off her bed. He didn't even turn his head to face her.
'' Jack I know this freaked you out a little, but… '' He interrupted her before she could finish her sentence.
'' Freaked me out a little, huh?! '' Jack said in fury. Andie opened her mouth to speak but he interrupted her again…
'' You have no idea how this '' He made a pause pointing her wrists with his forefinger… '' made me feel. '' he continued. Andie saw the expressions on his face changing so fast; one moment there was sadness and the other anger. Pure anger. Jack screamed as he threw a pile of books down to the floor.
'' What where you thinking?! '' His voice seemed to be a mixture of pain and anger. Andie had never seen him so out of control in her life. Her eyes filled with tears. She tried to hold them back and started taking slow steps towards him.
'' Jack, everything's fine. '' She tried to calm him down but her voice broke.
'' You cut yourself Andie. Nothing's fine. '' Jack stated the obvious.
No one talked for a minute. They both seemed lost in their thoughts. Finally, Andie decided to break the silence.
'' I just lost it for a split second, that's all. There's nothing you should worry about. Really. '' Her eyes encountered her desk. She was afraid to look him in the eyes. He could always tell when she was lying.
'' You're a terrible liar. Stop trying. '' He said with apathy in his voice.
'' Please don't be mad at me. '' Andie begged him. Tears fell down her cheeks in torrents, enough to down the entire city. She looked helpless, like a little girl who lost her way home.
'' You think I'm mad at you? '' Jack was surprised. Suddenly he felt terrible for the way he reacted. He was so harsh on her. '' Baby I'm not mad at you. I'm mad at myself. '' He whispered as he took her wet face on his hands.
'' Why-y-y? '' She stuttered.
'' Because I failed. I failed to make you happy. '' He felt like a thousand knives stabbed his body.
'' I am happy. '' Andie muttered in confusion.
'' If you were happy you wouldn't cut yourself. '' Pain was written all over his face.
'' Jack this is not your fault. ''
'' It is and you know it. I never had anything for my own. When you came I promised to myself I would take care of you. I would protect you against any danger. I failed. Don't you see it? I failed! '' Jack shouted. He wanted to kill himself. He deserved it after what he –thought he- did to her.
'' Jack it's not your fault I'm a damaged person. '' Andie said touching his cheeks as gentle as she could. Jack didn't move. He closed his eyes for a second and then responded…
'' I made you damaged. I'm a screwed up bastard. I messed you up. '' He looked away.
'' This is not true! Jack look at me! '' No matter how hard she screamed he didn't seem to hear. '' You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be! '' She said through her tears. Jack turned his head to face her.
'' Don't say that. ''
'' It's the truth. ''
'' No it's not. ''
Jack moved away from her and walked towards the door. Andie followed him as fast as she possibly could. They were both in her living room now.
'' What are you doing? '' She asked in agony.
'' I need some fresh air. '' He said grabbing his leather jacket from her couch.
'' What?! ''
'' I'll see you again in some hours. '' He said as he slammed the door behind him.
Andie was left alone in her apartment. She couldn't stop the tears from falling. Everything felt wrong. She hated herself! Jack was desperate and sad and it was her fault. She felt weak; she couldn't stay on her feet and her entire body was shaking. She left out a scream as she slid to the floor, her head resting on the wooden door. This would be a long night…